Her Mirror and Her Opposite
by brookemopolitan
Summary: "You can kid the world, but not your sister"-Charlotte Grey. It's been five years, but Cassie Beckett is back in NYC, and she won't let anything stand in the way of her big sister's happiness, not even Kate herself. A BabySisterBeckett!Fic. Nominated for the the 12th Precinct's Fan Awards: Best Character Specific Fic. COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

**I will confess. I'm new to the magical world of Castle (this is my first fic in the fandom *bites lip*). As I (finally) caught up on the series on DVD, the nasty little plot bunny of this little sister of Kate's snuck into my head, and I could not dislodge it, no matter how hard I tried. She grew, and took form, and even got a name. It wasn't until one day chatting with Tadpole24 on Twitter that I became convinced that this would ever work as a story. So a MASSIVE thank you to Tad, for bouncing ideas with me, and holding my hand, being an awesome beta and for not slapping me and telling me to calm the eff down. **

**Feel free to follow me on Twitter (my account is on private, so just let me know your username so I can accept your follow request =D) and Tumblr... I'm Brookemopolitan on both. I will be tweeting pretty regularly about this fic, and I'll be using the hashtag #CassieBeckett when I do.**

**Disclaimer. I do not own Castle. I am nowhere near genius enough to come up with the visual perfection that was Always. I do not own any recognisable characters. Cassie is my only baby.**

* * *

Kate slumped against the elevator wall. She fought to keep her eyes open as exhaustion seeped deep into her bones. They'd wrapped the case, Lynchberg was in custody, and Kate was looking forward to collapsing in the shower until the water ran cold. She barely restrained her yawn as she fumbled through her handbag for her keys. It wasn't until she had the door cracked open that she froze. She could hear something from within the apartment. She was _certain_ she hadn't left her iPod dock playing that morning. Adrenaline flooded her system as she drew her weapon and slipped quietly through her front door.

She'd just convinced herself that it was possible that she forgot to switch off her stereo when she saw the figure move across the room. Years of policing instincts overtook her reaction as she levelled her service weapon and barked "NYPD. Hands where I can see them." She saw the hands shoot up into the air as the figure stilled. A chuckle echoed through the dim apartment.

"Jesus, Katie. Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?" Kate froze. It couldn't be. Kate kept her gun trained on the figure as she leaned over to flip on a lamp.

"Cassie?" Kate shoved her gun back into its holster and crossed the living room in a single stride to pull her baby sister into a bone-crushing embrace. She pressed a kiss onto the crown of Cassie's head and breathed in the scent of the little sister she'd taken to JFK airport five years ago, dual passport in hand, and hadn't seen since.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Kate inquired, her voice rough and low. She felt Cassie's arms tighten around her mid-section.

"Baseball season?" Cassie suggested. Kate cleared her throat and waited for an explanation. Cassie took a step back from Kate and dropped a hand to her hip.

"My roommate was conducting a study on law enforcement agents being injured in the line of duty. He saw something in the _New York Times_ about how an NYPD detective named Kate Beckett got shot. Naturally, this caught my attention because I have a sister named Kate Beckett who lives in the fair city of New York and works as a detective." Cassie began her story with a flourish, twisting a lock of lilac streaked hair around her finger. "Then I thought, surely, this must be some sort of coincidence. The names Kate and Beckett aren't exactly uncommon, and I'm sure that if my sister had been shot in the line of duty, she'd find a spare moment to send me a text message about it." Cassie paused for a moment, and Kate took the opportunity to pull Cassie over to sit on the couch. When Cassie continued, her voice was significantly huskier.

"I was wrong. I took a look at the picture that went along with the front-page article. Apparently the Kate Beckett that was shot in the line of duty at a funeral in New York was my big sister; and she hadn't found a spare moment to let me know that she was alive. So I packed my stuff, sold my car and endured almost thirty hours of flying and layover time to make sure that you weren't dead." Cassie finished her story quietly, and began to fidget with the silver ring on her index finger.

"Cassie, I am so sorry." Kate breathed. She reached over and squeezed her knee. Cassie nodded. Kate didn't miss her sniffle. "Didn't Dad call you?" Kate asked after several moments of silence. Cassie looked up, a wry grin twisting on her lips.

"Katie, I haven't spoken to Dad since before I left for England."

"I asked him to call you as soon as I came out of surgery." Kate pressed. Cassie bit her lip and shrugged.

"He might have called. I don't know. I answered a call a couple months ago and all I heard was someone crying. I assumed it was a prank and hung up. I never heard back." Cassie mused, running a hand through her hair.

Kate nudged Cassie's shoulder lightly before sliding an arm around her. "I cannot believe you are here." Kate whispered. "How did you get in here, anyway?" Kate asked.

"I picked the lock." Cassie replied nonchalantly. Kate raised her eyebrow. "I asked your super to let me in." Kate scoffed in frustration. Cassie frowned.

"It is ok that I'm here, right? It should only be for a couple of days. I'm sure I can find a hostel or something to crash at." Kate stopped Cassie mid-ramble.

"Don't be ridiculous. You are more than welcome here." Kate informed her. She punctuated her statement with a yawn. "Sorry kid, I am beat." Kate informed her. She gestured for Cassie to follow her through the apartment. "My couch is super comfortable, so I'll grab you linens now. Bathroom is to your right, and my bedroom is just up the stairs." Kate recited. She pulled sheets and blankets from the closet, and made her way back down to the couch, where she made quick work of making up a bed.

"You know I'm not your kid sister anymore, right?" Cassie asked. "Because I can do this myself. If you want to get to bed or whatever." She added hastily. Kate turned around, hands on her hips.

"Cassandra Viktoria. You are my kid sister, like it or not. You dragged your ass back to New York from wherever for me; so I'm going to at least make up a bed for you." Kate lectured her.

"Australia." Cassie mentioned quietly. Kate frowned. "I've been living in Australia the past two years or so." Cassie explained. Kate huffed before continuing her spiel.

"Take out menus are in the drawer by the phone, you're welcome to attack anything in the kitchen." Kate added. She paused, and then pulled her baby sister in for another embrace. "I'm really glad you're back." Kate mumbled into her hair. Cassie grinned into her shoulder.

"I'm really glad I'm here too." Kate gave her an extra squeeze before heading toward the bathroom.

"By the way… I already showered, and I used your shampoo. I hope that's ok!" Cassie called to her retreating figure.

* * *

Kate cracked an eyelid open and groaned when she heard her phone ring. She glanced over at her alarm clock. A 5.42am wakeup call could only mean one thing.

"Beckett." She groaned blearily into the phone. So much for not being on call.

"I know your team isn't on call, but all the other teams are tied up and I've got a pop and drop just waiting to be solved." The uniformed officer explained down the phone.

"No rest for the wicked." Kate yawned. She forced herself to sit up and grabbed the notepad she kept by her bed, quickly scrawling down the address. She nodded along with the overenthusiastic description the uni gave her.

"ETA twenty five minutes." She eventually cut in, before hanging up the phone. She sent a text off to Castle, figuring that he probably wouldn't be interested in such a quote "boring" unquote case, but would moan like a bear with a toothache if she didn't tell him about it. She quickly dressed and stumbled downstairs, her coffeepot the only destination she had in mind.

"Good morning, sunshine." A voice called out across the small apartment. Kate's instincts instantly went into overdrive, and she had to force herself to calm down.

"Cassie! You cannot do that to me! I nearly had a heart attack." She gasped. Cassie giggled.

"Still grumpy in the mornings, I take it?" Cassie teased lightly. Kate growled lightly as she slapped the coffee machine on.

"Why are you even awake?" Kate asked as she poured coffee into a travel mug and rummaging through her pantry for a power bar.

"Isn't that the $64 000 question?" Cassie mused. She gave Kate a grateful grin when a mug full of steaming coffee was plunked into her hands. "I've been up since just after four am. I've lost count of how many time zones I've crossed in the past two and a half days, and my body clock has gone into protest." Cassie elaborated. Kate gave her a sympathetic smile.

"I'm really sorry, Cass, but I have to go into work." Kate told her hesitantly. Cassie gave her a dismissive wave of her hand.

"All good, big sis. Catch a murderer. Make this fine city a better place to live."

"As soon as this case clears, I'm asking for a personal day. I want to know what you've been up to in the last five years."

"Sounds good to me. Now go before the perp can strike again or whatever." Cassie told her. Kate shot her a grin, and kissed her cheek before snagging her keys and handbag, and shooting out the door.

* * *

The case had been fairly straightforward. The victim was a woman going through a very messy divorce, and after a waiting for a few hours on ballistics results; they had the husband (who clearly had serious anger management issues) in custody. Paperwork was well on its way to being finished, all in time for a knock off time that was within normal working hours. Kate had her head studiously bent over her paperwork, determined to ignore Castle's squeaks of excitement as he unlocked a new level of _Angry Birds._

"It was Miss. Scarlett, in the billiards room, with the candlestick, right?" Castle looked up as he heard Kate respond to the mystery voice, and barely registering Esposito and Ryan's responses. He suddenly didn't care about beating his record.

He observed the stranger with a writer's eye. Despite the purple that was artistically streaked through the mid lengths and ends of her dark hair (Alexis would call it ombre, and insist that it was very on trend), and the piercings and tattoos that scattered her body, the girl was all Beckett; from the angle of her cheekbones, right down to the high heeled boots that covered her toes.

"Castle." He abruptly broke out of his daydream to see Kate giving him an amused look.

"I'm sorry, I could have sworn your long lost twin just walked in here." He apologised quickly. Kate chuckled.

"Not quite. Castle, this is my little sister, Cassie. Cassie, meet Rick Castle. He consults with us on cases." Cassie stuck her hand out.

"Hey, how ya doin?" She asked with a cheerful smile. Castle took her hand with narrowed eyes and shook it, still quietly reeling over this new revelation.

His suspicious gaze wandered between his partner and Cassie for a moment before he finally turned to Kate. "How do I not know about this?"

But before Beckett can answer, her sister is speaking again.

"This could totally be the jetlag talking, but I feel like I know you from somewhere. Or like I should know you. Or something. I don't know. Maybe Katie mentioned you in one of her emails. Now you think I'm a blithering idiot. I'll shut up." Cassie rambled.

"He's a writer, Cass." Kate supplied, not even looking up from her paperwork. Cassie's jaw dropped.

"No." She gasped. "You're the writer that Katie…"

"Zakonchitʹ etu frazu , i vy budete spatʹ na ulitse nochʹyu." (Finish that sentence and you'll be sleeping on the streets tonight) Kate interjected swiftly in Russian. Cassie put her hands up innocently.

"Khorosho, khorosho. Vam nuzhno otdokhnutʹ. Vash sekretnyĭ eto bezopasno so mnoĭ." (Alright, alright. You need to relax. Your secret's safe with me).

"Is it ok if I ask that we speak English, for those playing along at home?" Castle questioned, eyes alight with amusement as he watched the two sisters interact. He almost wanted to record the two conversing (purely as character research, of course), but he valued his unbroken fingers more than he wanted the video footage. Cassie perched herself at the edge of Kate's desk.

"Explain this to me. If you're a writer, what exactly do you consult on?" Cassie asked.

"I write a series based on a New York homicide detective. Your sister is the inspiration." Castle explained easily. Cassie's eyebrows shot up, and she looked over at her sister.

"You're Nikki Heat?" She asked incredulously. Kate looked up from her paperwork and shrugged.

"Did I forget to tell you that?"

"So much to catch up on." Cassie muttered. Kate put her signature onto the last page with a flourish. She stood up and crossed to Esposito's desk and swapped files with him.

"What have you been up to today, anyway?" Kate asked as she began to flip through the forms. The details had all been filled in by Espo, but she had to put her own signature on the paperwork before it could be filed away.

"Eh, not a whole lot. Unpacked my stuff. Realised what a crappy packing job I did. Contacted my friends back in Sydney about shipping the rest of my stuff over. Laundry." Cassie ran her finger over the line of elephants Kate kept on her desk, inspecting the detail of the largest ornament.

"I cleaned out your refrigerator. Threw out all that crap in Styrofoam containers you call food." Kate looked up at her, aghast. Cassie stared her down.

"How you haven't ended up hospitalised for food poisoning, I'll never know. Your body is a temple Katie, and you need to respect that." Cassie teased lightly. Kate fixed her with the Beckett stare that was usually reserved for Castle.

"Just so you know, that stare normally means you're in trouble." Castle stage whispered helpfully.

"She learnt that stare from my mother. I'm pretty familiar with it. But thanks." Cassie whispered back. She gave Kate a charming smile.

"I was fairly certain that my cleaning job was going to be given a reception like that. So I went and did some grocery shopping when I set up my new phone number. Then I made these." Cassie reached into her oversize handbag and pulled out a large Tupperware container. Kate eyed the box, and hesitantly lifted the lid to peer inside. Her face cracked into a grin.

"You made oladi?" Kate asked.

"With fresh tykva, just like Babushka taught me." Cassie chuckled as Kate helped herself.

"Oladi are kind of like pancakes. They're made with pumpkin." Cassie explained. Kate looked over at Castle.

"I haven't had these in years. Please, help yourself." She gestured over to Ryan and Esposito as well. Ryan walked over via the photocopier, holding a stack of paper with a triumphant look on his face.

"Autopsy report and results from ballistics. Case officially closed, at 5.37pm. We are homicide gods." Ryan announced around a mouthful of food, dumping the forms on Kate's desk and fist bumping with Esposito.

"We should celebrate with a drink." Castle said decisively.

"Because you worked so hard on the case, right Castle?" Beckett teased. He shrugged.

"I worked hard not to irritate you. Or we could have a drink to welcome your sister back to New York?" He suggested. Kate looked over to Cassie.

"It's up to you kid? If you're gonna crash on the bar, or wouldn't be caught hanging out with your sister and her work mates, just say uncle." Kate told her.

"I resent the implication that we aren't cool enough for a girl in her early twenties to hang out with" Ryan interjected.

"I don't know what she's talking about, bro. We are the life of the party." Esposito added on, before offering Ryan one of their patented high fives.

"That's cute, guys. Do you only paint each other's toenails when other people aren't around, or can anyone join in on the fun?" Cassie quipped with a grin. She looked over at Kate. "Katie, I'm so in. Even if it is only to watch a bromance unfold."

"You think that Lanie will let Alexis off the old ball and chain for tonight?" Kate asked Castle.

"Given the circumstances, I don't think Alexis would forgive us if we didn't invite her along." Castle answered as he tapped out a text to his daughter. Cassie picked up the container of oladi.

"Do you guys have a refrigerator I can stash these in? I'm dangerous if I'm home alone with these babies." She asked. Kate nodded, before scribbling out a note and taping it to the top of the box.

"Break room. Third door on the left." Cassie picked up the box, giggled at the note before trotting off. Kate looked over at Esposito.

"Hey Espo." She waited for him to respond. He eventually looked over at her.

"I see you checking out my sister's ass." She informed him. His slightly glazed eye expression didn't change.

"I think you should stop." She advised in a mock whisper. She suppressed a grin as she watched Esposito shake himself. Cassie returned in the room, and bent over to pick up her gigantic bag. She casually looped arms with Kate as they followed the group out of the Precinct, into a series of cabs to take them to the Old Haunt.

* * *

**Reviews really would mean the world to me. Alternatively, I will accept Nathan Fillion with a ribbon around his neck. But reviews are good too... you know, whatever's easier.**


	2. Chapter 2

**I am so pleased at the amazing response i've gotten to this fic so far. so many alerts and favourite authors! It's so flattering.**

**I just thought I'd clarify... Cassie and Kate are 10 years apart in age.. Cassie is 23, and Kate is 33.**

**Once again, thank you so much to the fabulous Tadpole24... she is amazing, and she keeps posting the cutest post always one shots that I think you all should read.**

**If I owned Castle, it would be in Stana's contract that she has to be my best friend... My best friend is from Eastern Europe, but her name isn't Stana. Do the maths :D**

* * *

Cassie breathed deeply and absorbed her surroundings as she entered the Old Haunt. She ran her fingers gently across the bar and examined the pictures of famous writers on the wall, before dropping a tip in the piano player's cup with a wink. She turned towards the newcomer.

"Alexis, meet Cassie, my little sister. Alexis is Castle's daughter, and she's doing an internship at the moment with Lanie at the coroner's office." Kate introduced.

"Detective Beckett, I didn't know you had a sister." Alexis said as she took a seat next to Cassie.

"Don't worry about it, apparently nobody did. I think she's ashamed of me." Cassie interjected cheerfully. She winked at Kate.

"The topic never came up. I never denied your existence." Kate defended herself.

"How insane is it that this is the first American bar I've ever been to?" Cassie mused.

"Really?" Esposito asked as he set down bowls of bar nuts on the table. Cassie nodded and cracked open a peanut.

"I was in Europe before I was old enough to come into one over here. And I've only just gotten back. So I guess this is my welcome into the New York bar scene." Cassie explained.

"So where were you hiding for Kate to have never mentioned you?" Alexis asked.

"I spent a year in England. Then I spent two travelling through continental Europe, and I just got back from two years based in Australia." Cassie explained.

"So you've seen basically the whole world?" Alexis asked.

"I think I went to every country in Europe except Belarus and a couple of others, which is one of the many blessings of Mom fighting for Katie and I to get dual passports. The visa thing wasn't an issue. I didn't really get to see a lot of Asia. That was next on the list, but I guess we'll see if I ever get there." Cassie said.

"Did you see much of Ireland?" Ryan asked. Cassie smirked.

"Spent Saint Patrick's day of 2008 in Dublin. I hear it was an awesome night."

"You don't remember it?"

"I definitely remember arriving there. Beyond that, your guess is as good as mine." Cassie admitted sheepishly. She reached into her bag and pulled out her iPad. She opened it up and flipped through her apps quickly before handing it over to Ryan.

"Take a look. It's my travel scrapbook." She explained. Cassie looked over at the bar. It wasn't an overly busy night, but the poor girl behind the bar was working as hard and as fast as she could. Cassie fidgeted uncomfortably as she watched the girl pour a beer for one patron, while listening to the order for another, and taking money off a third. She shuddered.

"You ok?" Kate asked her quietly.

"I can't handle watching that poor girl getting her ass handed to her over there. I'm two patrons away from jumping up and helping her myself." Cassie explained with a shiver.

"Have you bartended much?" Castle asked her. Cassie nodded.

"Six months in a bar in Montmartre, then in Romania, Russia and the last two years in Sydney. It's easy money when you're travelling, especially if you have an accent."

"What else did you do when you were overseas?" Alexis asked.

"I started out doing a year as an au pair in London. Beyond that, I tended bars, did some life modelling, picked fruit, occasionally worked in clothing stores. Anything and everything really." Cassie told her.

"So you haven't gone to college yet?"

"I had no idea what I wanted to do when I finished school. I thought a gap year might give me perspective. Five years later, I'm back home and I still have no idea if I even want to study, and I am shockingly ok with it."

"Wow." Alexis looked like she'd just found out that the world was actually flat.

"Hey, it's not for everybody, but I kinda like going where the wind takes me."

"I know this might be a strange thing to ask, but do you mind if we swap phone numbers? I'd love to ask you a few more questions about taking a gap year if you don't mind." Alexis requested quietly. Cassie typed her number into Alexis's phone, assuring her that she could ask anything she liked about living overseas, as Alexis began to explain her conflict about where to go for college.

"I think it's good for her to hear that not getting into Stanford right away isn't the end of the world." Castle remarked to Beckett.

"I'm struggling to believe my kid sister is old enough to be giving people perspective on life. Makes me feel ancient." Kate replied. She greeted Annie (now Castle's tavern running right hand) politely when she came up to the table, before slipping away and heading up to the bar.

"Annie, what can I do for you?" Castle asked her, taking in her strained expression.

"I just had another bartender quit on me. We're reaching graduation time. I need to advertise for more staff." She told him, gesturing over to the busy bar.

"Annie, you know I'm happy to follow your lead on running this place. Do what you need to." Castle told her. Annie nodded and then hurried back behind the bar.

"Sorry, did I hear you say you need staff? Do you own this place?" Cassie asked. Castle nodded.

"This place is awesome." Cassie told him as she gazed over the architecture again. She cringed when she saw the busy bar and shot Castle a charming grin.

"Hi, I'm Cassie Beckett. Did you know that I've recently moved to New York City, am desperate for a job, and I can order a beer in ten languages?" She asked him charmingly.

"Ten languages? That is impressive." Castle remarked.

"English, Russian, French, Spanish, Italian, Greek, Turkish, German, Romanian and Australian." She counted off.

"Australian doesn't just count as English?" Alexis asked. Cassie shook her head.

"No way. Aussies take their drinking way seriously. It took me ages to work out what the hell 'g'day love, grab us a schooner of New, and a middie o' shandy on VB, woudja?' actually meant, because they speak so damn fast." Cassie recalled.

"Not Fosters?" Kate asked.

"God no. One, that stuff tastes like ass, and two, no self-respecting Aussie actually drinks it." Cassie looked at Castle. "Totally no pressure, but I am serious. I would love to work in this place. It is freaking amazing."

"Can you start next week?" Castle asked her. Cassie gaped at him.

"Let me tie my hair back and I can start right now. Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Cassie said as she stood up, and began to fumble through her handbag for a hair tie.

"Cool your jets. Next week will be fine." Castle told her.

"You are actually the greatest, and if you ever need any awkward teenage stories for Nikki Heat, you know where to find me." Cassie told him with a conspiratorial wink as Kate came back to the table with a tray in hand. Cassie inspected the half full bottle of vodka, a pair of shot glasses, and two beers sitting on the tray.

"Oh, you are a woman after my own heart." Cassie informed her big sister with a smirk.

"We are well overdue for this. Vy gotovy igratʹ s bolʹshimi detʹmi?" (You ready to play with the big kids?) Kate goaded her little sister. Cassie looked over at Ryan and Esposito, who were still flipping through her iPad.

"You mind getting this on video? I'm about to school my big sister in a drinking competition." Cassie boasted as she made a show of cracking her neck.

"Speaking from experience, trying to outdrink Beckett is a really bad idea. Especially chasing up with beer." Esposito warned her. Cassie raised an eyebrow at him.

"In Russia, we have a saying. Vodka without beer is money thrown in the wind. She has no idea who she is dealing with." Cassie told him in a perfect Russian accent.

"Are you going to sit there and talk all night, or are you actually going to drink at some point?"

Cassie glared at Kate. "Pour the shots." Kate picked up the bottle of Russian Standard, and poured out two equal measures.

"We doing this like they do in the old country?" Cassie asked as she carefully picked up the shot and moved her beer closer to her.

"Is there any other way?"

Cassie shrugged as they clinked their glasses together, before making the traditional opening toast, "Na zdorov'e," (To our health).

Both sisters breathed out before throwing the shot back without breaking eye contact. Both reached at the same time to take a swig of their beer. Cassie looked over at Ryan, who was still recording the scene with an incredulous look on his face.

"And that is step one of drinking like a Russian." She declared.

"Step two, three, and four include more of the same. Lots of toasts, and you can't ever sip vodka." Kate added.

"And caviar." Cassie interjected. Ryan ended the recording and handed the iPad back to Cassie. She and Kate immediately looked at the video.

"Dedushka would be very proud." Kate decided when the video concluded.

"I feel really rude. Sorry guys, this is the only instalment of Russian cultural education you'll get for the evening." Cassie told the table.

The rest of the evening was spent with Cassie and Alexis giggling in the corner, Cassie sharing ridiculous memories of her overseas travel, while she took in the charged interactions between her sister and her new boss. Kate had a hell of a lot of explaining to do; that was certain.

* * *

Cassie woke up at about 9.30 the next morning. All things considered, that was a fairly good transition into American time. She stumbled into the kitchen and put the coffee machine on, before twisting her curly hair into a loose bun on the top of her head. She rummaged through the pantry and refrigerator, and quickly got to work. She quickly threw together her pastry, and moved onto slicing ingredients.

"Morning, Cass." Kate greeted her roughly. Cassie looked up from the tray that she was setting.

"Aw man. Are you kidding me?" She groaned. Kate glided over to the coffee machine and quickly fixed herself a cup, before turning to look at her sister.

"I was hoping that I'd be able to surprise you." Cassie explained. Kate raised an eyebrow. She spotted her (very rarely used) blender sitting on the bench, and the light coming out of the oven.

"You are not making our home alone breakfast, are you?" Kate asked as she peered into the oven.

"Oh, but I am." The home alone breakfast was a long-standing tradition with the Beckett sisters. While it had started as a morning feast for when Mama and Papa Beckett had left Kate in charge of babysitting Cassie; it quickly morphed into the meal that the girls shared without fail whenever their parents weren't at home.

The chocolate pizza that had started as a culinary experiment by a 15-year-old Kate (strongly encouraged by a 5-year-old Cassie, who had been sat on the kitchen bench to "help", and had ended up in a sugar coma after eating as many peanut butter cups as had ended up on the pizza) had quickly become a staple menu item for whenever teenage Kate was left in charge of feeding her sister. The strawberry milkshake, (made with fresh fruit, naturally) had quickly become the signature drink to cut through the sweetness of the meal.

"You are not allowed to move into some frat house, where you'll probably catch an STD from the toilet seat." Kate informed Cassie as she began to set the table.

"Because that statement didn't come out of nowhere."

"I'm not kidding. I want you to stay here." Kate told her seriously.

"I know my study isn't that big, but we can convert it into a room for you. I've lived alone since I joined the police academy, and even though you constantly scare the crap out of me, I really want you to be here."

"Gosh, Katya, you drive such a hard bargain. Frat house that is most likely a secret crack den, or East Village loft with my big sister whom I've idolised ever since I can remember. I will consider my options and get back to you on that." Cassie teased.

"All my stuff should be shipped over from Australia within a week or so, depending on customs. The only things I'll really need is a bed and maybe some furniture." Cassie told her. She grabbed her sister in an impulsive embrace from behind, before moving to the oven when the timer went off. Kate couldn't help but raise an eyebrow when she spotted the tattoo that snaked its way up Cassie's spine.

"What does that say?" Kate asked, gently touching the Cyrillic lettering between Cassie's shoulder blades. Cassie put the tray down before she moved her singlet to show Kate the entirety of the tattoo that ran down her from the base of her neck to just above where her bra strap would sit.

"It's from _Macbeth. _Babushka used to read me Shakespeare all the time, and this was one of her favourites." Cassie told her.

"Screw your courage to the sticking place?" Kate read hesitantly, silently cursing herself for being so out of practice reading Russian script. "Are the doves for Babushka and Dedushka?" She asked. Cassie nodded as she began to slice up the pizza.

"It took me the longest time to understand why they called me Little Dove. I have one for you, you know." Cassie said. She scraped her messy bun to the side of her head and pointed to behind her ear, where a small cherry blossom was drawn, the tiny branch coming off the flower shaped to look like a K.

"It looks just like mine." Kate murmured, brushing a hand over her hip where her own cherry blossom tattoo lay.

"That was the idea. I put it there so you could always be in my ear about something." Cassie explained. They both sat down at the tiny kitchen table and began eating in silence.

"Do you have one for Mom?" Kate probed, after a few moments of quiet contemplation. Cassie shook her head.

"I've drawn more designs than I can think of, but none of them ever look right; and there is no way that I'm putting a permanent tribute to Mom on my body that isn't perfect."

"I've always wanted to get one for her, but the same thing. Nothing ever seemed good enough."

"I'll find it. Someday. It's going to happen." Cassie decided, before taking a sip of her milkshake.

* * *

"You need to spill, and fast. How did one year of nannying turn into five years of travel?" Kate asked Cassie as they crawled into her bed after cleaning the kitchen.

"I'm sorry, is this how you start all of your interrogations?" Cassie asked as she spread out across Kate's bed, and pulled a pillow to rest underneath her chest.

"Did you know that Mom kept a diary?" Cassie asked. Kate shook her head. Cassie nodded.

"She was pretty prolific. Got less and less detailed as we grew up, but she documented her trip to Europe before law school in freaking minute detail." Cassie sat up and moved to sit with her back against the headboard of the bed. "When I got to England, it was a relief. I felt like I could finally breathe. For the first time in years, I wasn't poor Cassie with the poor murdered mother. I could just be Cassie, the girl who loves jamming on the guitar even though she'll never be a rockstar. Or Cassie, the girl who can't stop doodling once you put a pencil in her hand." Cassie shrugged before she continued.

"Once I got there, I started reading her journals. I got to have Mom for such a small amount of time, and I felt like I had a piece of her with me. All I could think about as I read was what a life Mom had. She really lived." Cassie scrubbed at the tear that slid down her cheek.

"All we did after her death was focus on the fact that she was taken from us. It was brutal. It was unfair, and it was awful. We got so caught up in her death that we forgot to focus on the fact that she lived. My Mommy was a person, Katie. She was allergic to shellfish, and she loved the colour green. She made the most amazing breakfasts, and she would have kicked our asses to the pavement if all we did was mourn her loss. She wanted so much for us. She wanted us to have the most extraordinary lives possible." Cassie reached out to squeeze Kate's hand, who gave her a tearful smile.

"In her Europe journal, Mom talked a lot about not knowing who she was, or what she wanted. She'd finished a history degree, and she wanted to see the places that she'd learnt so much about. I felt the same way. I didn't have a clue of who I was, because my entire life was in the shadow of such a huge tragedy. I could barely remember how to live without that albatross around my neck."

"So after I finished my year of au pairing, I moved to Paris, and bunked with a few girls who danced at the Moulin Rouge. I tended bar at the Irish pub next door. And from there, I based my travel decisions firstly on the places Mom had mentioned in her journal, and other than that, I went to all of the places that I thought would be cool to see as a kid." Cassie recounted fondly.

"And do you feel like you know who you are?" Kate asked her.

"I feel like I know that you can't take a single thing in this world for granted. I know I'm the kind of person who knows what it means to dream as if you'll live forever, and live as though you'll die today. I don't want to ever look back at my life and think I was too chicken shit to take a chance." Cassie answered.

"I do not understand how it is that you spent the last five years looking at the most beautiful places in the world and you manage to have more emotional maturity than I've had in my entire life." Kate complained.

"Just lucky I guess." Cassie said facetiously. "And excuse me, speaking of explanations. What the hell is the story between you and Castle?" Cassie demanded.

"There's no story to tell." Kate informed her far too quickly for it to possibly be true.

"Ekaterina Natasha Beckett, ne lgi mne" (do not lie to me) Cassie growled at her in an eerily good impersonation of their grandmother.

"Don't think that you can act like Babushka and get a story where there isn't one."

"Fine, I'm calling Alexis." Cassie pulled her phone out and began to scroll through her contacts. Before she could hit call, Kate had crash tackled her from across the bed and began to tickle her mercilessly. Cassie squealed loudly enough to wake the dead, begged Kate to stop between giggles, and eventually fought her off, running to stand near the door. She held up her phone, Alexis's phone number highlighted.

"I'm completely prepared to call her, and get her whole sordid story. You can save yourself if you just spill." Cassie warned her breathlessly, black painted thumbnail hovering over the call symbol.

"Alright, fine! I'll tell you! Come sit your ass down." Kate finally gave in. Cassie gave her the same cheeky grin that she'd been using to get exactly what she wanted since she was four years old and crawled back onto the bed, curling into Kate's side and letting Kate play with her hair like she'd done since they were both kids.

"A couple of years ago, there was a series of murders that followed the in Castle's books. I dragged him in to consult on the case. It was right around the time that he killed off Derrick Storm. By the end of the case, he had come up with the idea of Nikki Heat, and he decided that he needed to shadow me for authenticity. Now he's a part of the furniture." Kate told her.

"He is completely in love with you." Cassie informed her bluntly. She didn't miss the way her sister's face dropped.

"I know."

"What do you mean you know?" Cassie questioned. Kate gestured for Cassie to sit up, then unbuttoned the front of her pyjama shirt, and showed Cassie the bullet-sized scar on her sternum. She lifted the side of her shirt to expose the surgical scars along her ribcage.

"He told me he loved me when I was shot. I told him I didn't remember right after I came out of surgery. At first I thought I did it to protect him. It was an extreme situation. He probably thought I was gonna die, why hold it against him? Because he would. He is such a good man that he would hold himself to that obligation, even if what he said was the heat of the moment and nothing else." Kate paused, and placed a hand against the scar on her chest.

"I could have come clean. But I realised it was for the best. I am so hopelessly fucked up, all I will do is hurt him."

"You don't have to be perfect for people to love you, Katie." Cassie implored her.

"I have PTSD." Kate admitted to Cassie quietly. "I'm seeing a great shrink, and I'm slowly getting better."

"For your own sake, I hope." Cassie interjected.

"Yeah, for my own sake. He makes me happy, Cass. In my broken and fucked up state, he makes me happy. Some days I wonder, if he makes me happy when I'm like this, how much better will it be when I'm actually brave enough to let him love me?"

"You're such a softie." Cassie teased. Kate smirked, tugging her back into her side.

"Don't go telling anyone. I have a reputation to uphold."

"Is that why you freak out if I sneak up on you?" Cassie asked with an innocence that reminded Kate so much of the six year old who used to sneak into her room while she was doing her world history notes and would ask when she would be allowed to do cool things like homework, too.

"It doesn't help." Kate answered truthfully, scratching her nails across Cassie's scalp.

"Well then, that is rule number one of the roommate agreement. No sneaking up on each other." Cassie declared, sitting up abruptly.

"We need a roommate agreement?" Kate asked.

"Oh, absolutely. And the answer is no, you cannot put into the roommate agreement that I am not allowed to throw out your salmonella ridden takeout boxes as I see fit." Cassie informed her as she opened up a new page in her notes app to draw up the agreement.

* * *

**The pub that Cassie mentioned working at in Montmartre is a real place (O'Sullivans next to the Moulin Rouge, for those who have been to Paris, or those going to Paris someday...it is absolutely filthy and I loved every second of it. That pub is the reason I no longer drink tequila), and I based Cassie in Sydney for her time in Australia because that's where I grew up, and I feel like I can write about it like a real Sydneysider, not someone with access to Google. **

**With that in mind, if you have any amusing travel anecdotes that you wouldn't mind sharing for Cassie to experience, please, let me know. PM them to me, or pop them in my drop box on tumblr, or tweet them to me... I'm brookemopolitan on both.**

**I'm REALLY hoping a few of those alerts turn into reviews... it would make my day, especially as there seems to be some legal issues around acquiring Nathan (something about kidnapping... sounds like a technicality to me). **


	3. Chapter 3

**So.. I seem to be on quite the updating frenzy (much to Tadpole24's amusement), so roll with it while you can, guys. Half yearly exams are coming up (I'm a high school teaching), so in a few weeks I'm going to have a shitload of marking to do, so updates may slow down slightly... But I'm doing my best to stay on top of updating this baby whenever I can :)**

**If I owned Castle, there would be no seasons... Just continuous shooting and new episodes.**

* * *

Kate was finally using her much overdue days off to get Cassie settled in her apartment. Cassie's imitations of _Friends _as they moved her new furniture up the narrow stairs of the apartment building were getting mighty old, fast.

"We are carrying a flat pack containing a bedside table. It does not need to pivot." Kate growled warningly as they picked up the final box to move upstairs. Cassie rolled her eyes.

"Somebody needs to change outta their cranky pants." Cassie muttered.

"Did you say something?"

"Not a thing." Cassie replied quickly as they crossed the threshold into the apartment. The flat pack was set against the wall near Cassie's bedroom door. Cassie walked into her room and sighed as she looked at the boxes that had finally made their way from Australia. She trudged over to the largest box and tore off the packing tape that held the lid closed. She flipped the lid open and a massive grin spread over her face. She swiped the bag that sat on top of the box, and hurried out to the kitchen.

"Katie, put the coffee pot on. I need to show you something."

* * *

Kate looked at Cassie hesitantly as she ripped open the package of chocolate biscuits and explained the cultural mores attached to eating this specific type of cookie.

"And you're sure I can't just eat it… like a regular cookie?" Kate asked for the third time.

"Absolutely not. Now bite opposite corners off." Cassie ordered. Kate rolled her eyes slightly but complied.

"Now stick one corner into the coffee, and use the Tim Tam like it's a straw." Kate swept her hair back before dunking the edge of the biscuit in the coffee and sucking gently. Cassie grinned when Kate's eyes lit up at the taste.

"Now, as soon as you taste coffee, flip is around and put it in your mouth before it collapses." Cassie cried, giggling as she watched Kate struggle to put the rapidly crumbling treat into her mouth.

"Oh my God." Kate moaned around her mouthful of food.

"Didn't I tell you it was a tiny rectangle of orgasmic deliciousness?"

"I will never doubt you again." Kate declared seriously as she licked her fingers.

"I need to find out where to find these in New York. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that if and when the zombie apocalypse comes, you could use these babies as currency." There was no hint of irony in Cassie's voice.

"You probably could. But this stuff looks like congealed motor oil." Kate said, pointing to the jar with a proud yellow label across the front.

"I know, I thought that too. The first time I had it, I thought it was seriously nasty. I later found out that you don't actually use this stuff as liberally as one might use PB&J. There is a fine art to the serving of Vegemite, and it involves very hot toast, and a lot of butter, and it also acts as the world's greatest hangover cure. I'll convert you some day." Cassie reassured her cheerfully as she slid the Tim Tams in the refrigerator, the Vegemite in the pantry and her coffee mug in the dishwasher, before gliding back into her room to unpack.

* * *

Cassie straightened the last of the ornaments on her bookshelf with a smile. She was finally unpacked. She grabbed the stack of journals off her bed and made her way up to Kate's room. She knocked softly on the open door.

"Hey Katya. I found those journals of Mom's, and I thought you might like to read them?" Cassie asked quietly, holding out the stack of notebooks. Kate smiled and patted the bed, gesturing for Cassie to take a seat.

"Thanks, Cass. I've got something for you." Kate held out a yellowed envelope to Cassie. Cassie took the envelope and inspected it, drawing a sharp breath when she noticed her name scratched across the front in her mother's handwriting.

"I have one too. Mom wrote them on the day we were born, for us to open on our 21st birthdays. I didn't want to risk posting it to you when you were moving around so much." Kate explained. Cassie nodded, stroking the script on the front of the envelope carefully. She slowly opened the envelope, sliding the letter out, her mother's beautiful handwriting flowing across the page.

_My beautiful Cassandra,_

_You're finally here. You were quite the surprise, little princess. We never expected that you would come along, but oh are we glad that you did. Our family has always had a tiny hole in it, one that we never quite knew how to fill, but now that you're here, I think we might be so full we could burst._

_You've only been with us a few hours, but I already feel like I know you so well. You're my little __svobodnyĭ dukh__, my free spirit. You were always so relaxed, and never once did you drive your feet into my ribcage (unlike a certain older sister of yours who shall remain nameless). I can already see that you're going to do things exactly when you want to, and not when somebody else tells you to, including being born. You were over a week late my little gypsy, and we were all so anxious to meet you. _

_Your big sister always seemed like such a lonely girl. She always begged me for a little sister. When she saw you for the first time, you stole her heart. Treasure your big sister. She will love and protect you with her dying breath. _

_Your grandmother wanted me to give you a traditional Russian name. We were all set to greet Anastasia (or Alexei; your father was convinced you'd be a boy, but I always knew otherwise) until we saw your face. Your sister is named for Katherine the Great, and I knew I wanted to give you a name with weight, with history. When I saw your face I knew you couldn't be named for a missing princess. The name Cassandra means "she who ensnares men", and my baby girl, you already have your daddy and your grandfather wrapped around your little finger. To be quite honest, I think this entire family has been entirely ensnared by you. Such charisma is a gift, __Malenkaya (little one), and I hope that you will always use it wisely. I do not think you'll be cursed as your namesake was, you're only eight hours old and you've already made your presence (and your appetite) perfectly clear._

_My beautiful little girl, I don't care if you become a teacher, a shopkeeper, a chef, or if you walk on the moon. All I want is for you to be happy. I want to you to have the life you always dreamed of. I want you to live without regret, without second-guessing yourself. I want you to have the world as your oyster._

_I am the one to love you first, and I will love you until my last breath. I will always be your greatest supporter, and I will cherish you always. You are my missing puzzle piece, my final work. With you, I am complete, and you and your sister will be the greatest things I ever do, and my most precious treasures._

_I love you, little princess, forever and a day._

_Mama._

Cassie gently folded the letter and pressed a kiss to the page, silent tears streaming down her face. She felt Kate's arms wrap around her in a bruising embrace.

"Ya dyeĭstvitelʹno skuchayu po nyeĭ, Katie," (I really miss her) Cassie gasped out through her tears. Kate pressed a kiss to her forehead, and rocked her little sister gently, murmuring comfort to Cassie in an indiscernible mix of English and Russian.

"She was taken from us, i eto ne spravedlivo (and it isn't fair). What did we do wrong? Katie, I want my Mommy back." Kate didn't care that Cassie's tears were soaking the fabric of her shirt. She clung to her sister harder, gently scraping her nails across Cassie's scalp in an attempt to calm her down. She felt Cassie's breathing quicken, and felt as Cassie's nails began to dig into her ribs. Kate pulled away to see Cassie's face rapidly beginning to turn blue as she gasped for air.

"Fuck. Cassie, you're having a panic attack. I know you're freaking out right now, but I need you to concentrate and calm down. Hold my hands." Kate instructed. She reached out and clutched Cassie's hands in hers, refusing to wince at the iron grip.

"Ok, you need to slow down your breathing. Take a nice big breath in, and now you're going to hold it for ten seconds, can you do that?" Cassie nodded, the panic in her eyes lessening as Kate's calm tone washed over her, Kate squeezing her hands in encouragement.

"Ready? Now, breathe in, and desyat, deyvat, vosem, sem, chest, pyat, chetyre, tri, dva, odin. Now breathe out like you're blowing out a candle." Kate crooned gently, counting backwards in Russian for Cassie's benefit.

"Good girl, now, we're going to do that again. Ready?" Kate coached Cassie through the panic attack, pressing gently on her diaphragm to make sure that Cassie was breathing from the right place. Kate felt relief rush through her as colour slowly returned to Cassie's face.

"I think I'm ok." Cassie gasped slowly.

"I'm glad. Don't scare me like that, little girl!" Kate admonished her gently.

"I will do my best to time my future panic attacks for when you're at work." Cassie joked lightly.

"Not funny." Cassie grinned at her, but felt it drip off her face at Kate's expression.

"I've had a panic attack or two." Kate revealed, hand unconsciously snaking up to press against the scar that lay under her tear (and probably snot) soaked shirt. "I've only ever had them when I'm alone, and Cassie, they are really freaking scary to go through when nobody is around to talk you down."

"Sorry. I didn't mean to freak you out."

"It's fine. Just don't do that to me again." Cassie sprawled on her back, and picked up the letter. Kate lay on her side next to her.

"You were going to name me Anastasia? Jesus, Kate! Did you hate me or something?"

"I was ten years old! I was incredibly supportive of the name Beatrice. And I'd been begging for a sister to boss around since I was three!"

"I would have spent my entire life kicking people in the shin for calling me Stacey. God… that name is fucking awful."

"Oh hush. We could have called you Olga." Kate poked Cassie in the ribs. Cassie let out an involuntary giggle before slapping Kate's hand away.

"I forgot that she used to say that." Cassie commented.

"What did she used to say?" Kate asked. Cassie rolled to her side, and put a hand on Kate's shoulder, thumb pressing across her collarbone.

"Before bed. She'd put her hand on your shoulder, and say 'I love you, little princess, forever and a day.'" Cassie recalled fondly. Kate gave her a sad smile.

"My first week at Stanford, I used to call her every night, just to hear her say that to me."

"We had the best mama in the whole world."

"We really did." Cassie sat up abruptly.

"Get dressed." She commanded Kate. Kate raised a questioning eye at her. They'd agreed to home-delivered Thai food and wine, and not leaving the apartment unless the building was on fire.

"Katie, right now. I think I just worked out the perfect tribute. Wear a tank top." Cassie told her, eyes alight with excitement, before dashing out of the bedroom towards her closet.

* * *

Alexis Castle was home on a Saturday night. She was in no mood for the partying antics of her best friend, and she was content to flick around the Internet from the comfort of her bed. She was reading a blog of Cassie's (written from when Cassie had visited Jane Austen's house in Hampshire), when a new video popped up on her Facebook timeline. She clicked on the link, and her jaw dropped as the action unfolded. She unplugged her laptop and bolted down the stairs of the loft, skidding into her father's office on socked feet.

"Daddy, I know you're writing right now, but you're gonna want to see this." She gasped breathlessly. She plunked her laptop onto his desk and hit play. Cassie's face came into view, clearly recording on her iPad.

"_Hey, hey, hey, pals and gals from the four corners of the universe. Cassie here, and I'm at Fineline Tattoo, located on the Lower East Side of New York Cit-ay. It also happens to be the oldest running tattoo shop in town. We are here tonight with Mike, who was kind enough to slip us in after he had a cancellation. Mike, say hi to the camera." She flipped the camera around to show a grizzled looking man with a beard who stuck his tongue out at the camera like a member of Kiss. _

"_The camera loves you baby," Cassie's voice rang out over the recording as Mike snapped on rubber gloves and prepared the tattooing needle._

"_I'm here tonight with my gorgeous, intelligent and hilarious big sister, Kate. Believe it or not, ladies and gents, she's still single. Katie, you wanna tell the world what we're doing here tonight?" The camera panned over to Kate, who was reclined on the tattooing lounge, clad only in a black tank top and jeans. Kate rolled her eyes, but humoured Cassie._

"_Hi, world? You heard right, I'm the mature big sister, and I am apparently not as immune as I thought to Cassie's crazy schemes. We're here tonight to get a tribute to our late mother. This is something that she always used to say to us, and we both thought it would be really special if we could get it in her handwriting. To cut a long story short, I'm now sitting on a tattooing stool trying not to think about the giant needle that is going to be going in and out of my chest." Kate explained with a grin, false bravado echoing over her final statement. _

"_Katie Beckett, badass extraordinaire, who'da thunk you'd be scared of needles?" Cassie teased lightly. Kate stuck her tongue out._

"_Shut up and hold my hand, little Miss Bad Idea Bear." Cassie's grip on the camera changed, and her hand dropped into the shot. Kate nodded when Mike asked if she was ready. A loud buzzing echoed around the room, and Kate couldn't help the squeak that escaped her lips when the needle touched her skin._

"_You good?" Cassie asked. Kate nodded._

"_I forgot how much this hurts." Kate admitted; teeth slightly clenched. _

"_Keep breathing. You're doing fine. It's right on the bone, so it's going to hurt a little more. Remember, you're on the camera." Cassie coached her. Kate nodded with her eyes clenched shut. Her sigh of relief was audible when Mike pulled the needle away from her skin. _

"_Oh, Katie, it's perfect." Cassie sighed as Kate took a look in the mirror. The camera quickly focused onto the words "forever and a day", written in her mother's hand permanently branded onto Kate's collarbone in white ink. Kate gave the camera a winning smile._

"_I love it. Now it's your turn." Kate declared. She grabbed the camera off Cassie, and flipped it around as Cassie pulled off the light bolero she wore over a tie dyed strapless maxi dress, and she plonked herself down in the chair._

"_Now, Mike's off sterilising, so it is time for you to answer some questions." Kate decided. Cassie nodded._

"_First tattoo?" Cassie pointed to her left hip _

"_Lyrics from my favourite Queen song." She explained. _

"_Most painful?"_

"_Oh, my ribs, without a doubt. Guys, just say yes to the numbing cream." Cassie answered._

"_Any spur of the moment tattoos?" Kate asked. _

"_Only this one." Cassie rested her right index finger over her lip and playfully pulled a duck face, revealing the fingerstache that sat there. _

"_I was bored, and with a friend who was getting some ink done. C'est la vie." Cassie shrugged. Mike came back into the shot._

"_You ready to do this?" He asked. Cassie nodded._

"_Bring it." She shot the camera a wide grin when she felt the needle touch her skin._

"_Ooh, I love the burn." She joked. _

"_You're a machine." Kate commented from off camera. _

"_I've got a little bit more experience than you do." Cassie pointed out._

"_True." Cassie grinned when Mike removed the needle from her skin. She immediately took a look in the mirror._

"_Mike, you are a god among men." Cassie told him. Cassie then stepped next to Kate and both stood in the frame of the camera. _

"_This is Cassie and Kate, signing off." Cassie told the camera. She blew a kiss, and shut off the recording_.

Alexis looked at her father. He was completely frozen. Alexis looked at her timeline, where Cassie had uploaded several shots herself and Kate, certain to get plenty of photos of the new tattoos.

"Afraid you don't know Kate quite as well as you thought?" Alexis asked. Her father remained motionless. Alexis frowned.

"Well… I'm going to remind you that you have a deadline coming up, and you need to get writing, and leave you to that." She pecked her father on the cheek, picked up her laptop and sauntered out of the room, giggling when she heard her father scramble for a notebook and muttering about how he had to write that down before he forgot. She sat back down in her bed, and only hesitated for a moment before writing on Cassie's wall.

* * *

Cassie seated herself at the Bluebird Cafe and took advantage of the free WiFi while she waited for Alexis. She'd underestimated how well she remembered the streets of the East Village, and she'd made it there without getting lost.

"Hi, Cassie. I hope you weren't waiting long." Alexis apologised as she sat down in the booth opposite Cassie.

"Not at all, Lexi. I just got here. Don't stress. I'm pretty easy going." Cassie reassured her with a grin. "Now, what is good here?"

"Everything." Alexis told her with a grin. "I'm not kidding. You won't be disappointed." Cassie nodded seriously and perused the menu. She shot a grin at the rather hipster looking waitress who came up to take their order.

"We need to talk." Cassie stated definitively.

"Do we?" Alexis asked. Cassie nodded emphatically.

"My sister is wildly in love with your father." Cassie said bluntly as their coffees and pastries were placed on the table. Alexis nearly choked on her blended mocha.

"Excuse me?"

"Oh come on. I cannot be the only person to see this. The only person who doesn't know that Kate Beckett is in love with Rick Castle is Rick Castle." Cassie took a sip of her caramel cappuccino. "Oh sweet Jesus in heaven. There is decent coffee in New York City."

"She really loves him?" Alexis asked, breaking a piece of her almond croissant. Cassie nodded.

"And it's blatantly obvious that your dad feels the same way. I'm sure you can see the predicament we find ourselves in."

"Predicament?" Alexis echoed.

"Oh, you have so much to learn, my young Padawan. I know Katie. She's a perfectionist. She won't go anywhere near your dad unless a) she feels 100 percent together and perfect herself, and b) she is certain that your dad is in it for the long haul. My sister believes in one and done, but she's too scared to chase it with the one guy who is perfect for her, because she's violently petrified that she'll screw it up. Hence the string of short term meaningless relationships with perfectly nice, and by nice I mean utterly boring guys who will ultimately leave her unsatisfied and claiming that there's no such thing as true love. She's a hell of a lot of woman, and that scares the crap out of most men." Cassie explained.

"And that's why she hasn't gotten involved with my dad?" Alexis confirmed.

"Exactly. She's already emotionally invested. Clearly. But she's scared of him actually being the one, and she's scared _because_ she is emotionally invested, and every other person she's ever emotionally invested in has cut and run because they can't deal with her Beckett-y ways."

"Beckett-y ways?"

"The Beckett women are feisty, independent, hard headed and really freaking stubborn. We don't ask for help, and we don't take kindly to people who act like we should be any less than who we are. Try and chain us to the kitchen sink and you may end up with a meat cleaver buried in your jugular." Cassie told her.

"So where do we come in?" Alexis questioned.

"Talk to me about your dad."

"My dad… he hasn't lost his sense of joy about the world. Everything is good and agreeable to him. He sees people in the best possible light, no matter what. He sees the good in people so clearly that he occasionally fails to recognise their imperfections. Hence the two failed marriages. He is fundamentally generous, and he wants to leave a mark on the world. He's like, crazy smart. Like, could have gotten a PhD if he wanted one smart, but he's never let himself stop learning. He likes to be challenged. His family means everything to him." Alexis described him.

"Now we've just gotta find a way to line up the puzzle pieces, and convince them that the other half is there. I hope you'll accept the challenge I present to you."

"There is nothing that would please me more."

Cassie picked up her cup, and gently clinked it against Alexis's glass.

* * *

**I don't really know where this angst is coming from, either. I never used to be able to write it... but apparently there is plenty more where that came from... (although I have some cute stuff coming up too!)**

**Reviews are like Caskett kisses. No matter how many you get, you're always left wanting more!**


	4. Chapter 4

**It feels like a really long time since I've updated. Let's blame lack of motivation, excursions with high school students that finish at 1am, and dress shopping where Cassie used to live in Sydney.**

**As always, a massive thanks to Tad, and I think you ALL should go read her wonderful work :D**

**If I owned Castle... I don't really have anything snappy to say. I just don't own it. But I do own Cassie.**

**I want to warn you all... Jim Beckett's addiction is discussed at some length in this chapter. Owing to this discussion, and Cassie's proclivity for using the word fuck, I've bumped the rating up to T.**

* * *

"What the hell happened to my living room?"

Cassie shot Kate the most charming grin she could manage, before ducking her head as Kate surveyed the chaos around her. All the furniture had been pushed up against the walls, and the floor entirely lined with newspaper. Cassie was crouched over a hard guitar case at the centre of the room, hair twisted up in a paintbrush. The case had been painted entirely white, and Cassie had a palette of acrylic paint balanced precariously in her right hand. She was biting her lip and studying the guitar case with the same level of detail that Kate might study a murder board.

"Cassie, I know we agreed that this place is yours as much as it is mine, but come on. At least tell me before you start moving things." Kate complained. Cassie hushed her.

"I'll move it all back. Stop distracting me. I'm a genius at work here." Cassie told her. She picked up a paintbrush with a flourish, and began blending a shade of grey, before beginning to paint down the neck of the guitar case. Kate balanced against the arm of the couch and picked up Cassie's guitar. She began to pluck out a few notes and filled the apartment with a soft melody.

"Glad to have your guitar back?" Kate asked. Cassie nodded.

"You know, I only started playing because you did." Cassie confessed.

"Really?" Cassie looked up at Kate.

"Come on Kate. What six year old actually wants to make their fingers bleed on steel strings? I fucking idolised you. You know Mom had to talk me out of dressing up as you for Halloween two years in a row?"

"I did not know that." Kate admitted. She began to pluck out the opening chords of _Brown Eyed Girl._ While none of the Beckett sisters or their mother actually had brown eyes, all of their eyes did darken along with their mood. If Jim Beckett ever caught any of his girls with eyes that were more hazel than green, he would crank the Van Morrison song in the living room, and pull them up to dance with him, singing along loudly and badly until his girl was giggling, eyes turned green with amusement. Cassie immediately stiffened, eyes downcast as she concentrated on the Eiffel Tower she was painting.

"Dad's giving his testimony today at his meeting." Kate said hesitantly.

"I'm thrilled for him." Cassie muttered behind gritted teeth.

"I'm going to support him and we're meeting for coffee afterwards." Kate added.

"Have a swell time."

"I think you should come."

"I think I'd rather slit my wrists and go swimming with hungry sharks." Cassie retorted, her knuckles turning white around her paintbrush.

"Cassie, he's been sober for nearly ten years now. I think it might be time that you try and forgive him." Kate placated gently.

"Kate, just leave it alone."

"You're not the only one who had to deal with his addiction, you know."

"You have got to be fucking kidding me. How dare you?" Cassie finally snapped, throwing her paintbrush aside and standing up.

"Don't you dare tell me that you had to deal with his addiction. You didn't live with him. You didn't lie awake in the middle of the night, petrified that he'd choked on his own vomit. You didn't have beer bottles pelted at your head because you'd called an ambulance when you found him passed out when you got home from your school trip to DC. You wouldn't have even known he had an addiction if it wasn't for me." Cassie raised a hand to stop Kate from interrupting.

"You finished college. You moved back to the city and you dove into the rabbit hole of Mom's case. Do you know what he said to me the day that I came to your apartment?" Cassie drew a breath, and accidentally smeared paint from the back of her hand across her cheek.

"He told me that I was never supposed to be born. That he wished that I were dead instead of Mom. I was fourteen fucking years old. Terrified out of my fucking mind, I ran through New York City at night, and turned up to your apartment that was wallpapered with photos of Mom's mutilated body. I got shipped off to boarding school, and you came in on your white horse and saved Dad from himself." Cassie's cynicism echoed bitterly around the loft.

"He talks about you all the time. About how he's sorry for what he put you through. How he wants to make amends." Kate told her.

"That's really interesting. He had three years of when I was in the same city as him to do exactly that. All her could talk about was you. How you saved his life. You were so noble, becoming a detective so that nobody had to suffer the way that he suffered when we lost Mom. Never once did he even think about what I went through."

"You don't know that, Cass."

"Don't I? Did either of you think about what it was like for me? I was a kid, Kate. I was a kid and I had to parent my own father because he was too busy killing himself to notice that I was grieving too. You were so determined to solve Mom's case that you didn't even notice the hell that was my life for nearly five years. So don't you dare tell me that I should be the bigger person and forgive and forget."

"Are you really going to hold how he behaved against him? He was sick, Cassie. It was no more his fault than when Dedushka had dementia and thought we were trying to drag him to a gulag when we put him in a nursing home." Kate asked, trying desperately to reason with her emotional sister.

"Bullshit. Addiction is a disease that only ever rears its head when it is fed a substance. That is a bullshit argument, Kate. He did this to himself, and he only gave a rat's ass about how it affected you. I am not asking you to understand my position. I'm asking you to respect it. I do not want a thing to do with that man. So keep wearing the watch, Kate. You're the one that saved his life." Cassie knelt back down next to the case, and picked up her brush again, turning to face away from Kate.

"We'll be in Williamsburg if you change your mind." Kate told her quietly, putting down the guitar and picking up her handbag.

"Don't forget to lock the door on your way out." Cassie said coldly.

* * *

Kate got home to an empty apartment. The living room had been put back together, Cassie's beautifully decorated guitar case, still drying on the coffee table the only noticeable difference_._

Kate sighed, running a hand through her hair. It was likely that she'd just forgotten that Cassie was working that night. Cassie was probably the only person in the world who could rival her stubbornness. She understood all of Cassie's hurts. She really did. Cassie might appear happy go lucky and cheekily cheerful, but underneath that well crafted façade was a little girl who had been deeply wounded by her father's reaction to her mother's death. She hid behind the mask of a free spirited gypsy, but when it came down to it, Cassie was a little girl who wanted her hurts kissed better.

Kate had to face the truth. She'd been buried so deeply in her own grief at Johanna Beckett's murder that she had barely stopped to contemplate how a nine-year-old Cassie might have reacted.

In hindsight, she remembered Cassie spending a lot of time at their grandmother's tiny apartment. Their grandmother's death had been sad, but not altogether unexpected. The tiny Russian spitfire had lived until the ripe old age of ninety-seven, and had insisted in her will that all her money be spent on her granddaughters' education.

Kate had been floundering. The day that Cassie had arrived at her apartment (only a few months after the death of Babushka), hysterical but refusing to tell her what had been said to work her into such a state. Kate had unwittingly turned her tiny apartment into a live in murder board for her mother, and only ever took it down when she knew she would have guests (and even then, she avoided having people at her apartment for that very reason). Cassie's reaction to the macabre shrine had been the push that Kate needed to realise that her obsession was far from healthy.

She stored the case files and related images in her hall closet in a box that was so firmly taped shut that she needed a switchblade to open it. Kate didn't know the details of what had traumatised Cassie so severely, but it was clear that she could no longer be under the same roof as their father. Kate enrolled Cassie as a boarding student at York Preparatory School (telling Cassie that she'd won an extremely prestigious scholarship), using Babushka's inheritance and the sob story about their mother to win Cassie a place. She kicked her Dad's ass into rehab (by telling him the horror story of her own addiction to justice for her Mom), and found herself a therapist. One of the very first things she'd been able to do with the help of the fabulous Dr. Wick was invite Cassie to her new apartment, make her their traditional breakfast and apologise sincerely for failing to protect her.

Cassie was doing well at school, Jim had finally managed to get control of his addiction, and Kate was in a healthy mental space and had finally been made detective. She couldn't help but notice the irony of her becoming a detective after she'd finally laid her mother's case to rest. In hindsight, it was likely that it actually wasn't irony at all. Her superiors had to have known that Kate wasn't in a healthy state of mind, and no matter how brilliant and committed she was to the job, there was no way that they could promote her to detective unless they knew she was in a stable enough headspace to deal with the horrors that homicide detectives faced every day.

Kate honestly thought she'd acted in the best way she possibly could for all parties involved. She had no idea that Jim hadn't apologised to Cassie in the same profuse way that he had to her. She'd noticed that the relationship between Cassie and Jim was significantly fraught with tension the day that Cassie had graduated high school as an honour roll student. The next day Cassie had left for England (and it wasn't until a week later that Kate had realised that Cassie hadn't told Jim that she was going to be living on another continent for at least a year). She hit Cassie's speed dial and listened as the call rang out to Cassie's voicemail. Kate bit her lip and left a message.

"Cass. Honey, I know you're mad at me. I'm sorry that I pushed you. Surprise, surprise, I had my blinkers on, and I didn't even think about what you might be feeling toward Dad. Please, just let me know where you are. I can't help but think the worst…" Her voice broke slightly and she continued, "Occupational hazard I guess. I just got you back, Cass. I don't want to lose you again. Even if you don't want to talk, just let me know that you're okay." She ended the call, and crumpled down on the couch. She was way too stressed to even consider eating, and she was well aware that she was probably overreacting and imagining the worst. She unlocked her phone and accessed her speed dial, hitting call before she could change her mind.

"Tell me it's a juicy one." Castle's cheerful voice rang down the line.

"Castle, I screwed up really big this time." Kate admitted, her voice cracking.

"Kate, what's wrong?" She couldn't help the shiver that ran down her spine like syrup when she heard the change in Castle's tone.

"Cassie and I… we had a fight this afternoon. A pretty big one. The last time she was this mad at somebody she moved overseas for five years. I'm freaking out." Kate admitted, feeling a slight sense of relief to be able to unburden on her partner.

"So she's not at home?" Castle asked. Kate shook her head, and felt like a monumental idiot for not remembering that Castle couldn't actually see her over the phone.

"No, she's not. And I can't remember if she said she was working tonight or not."

"Alright, well, I'm going to hang up with you for just a second. It's the end of the month, so Annie should be in doing invoices. I'll call her and see if Cass is at work. Now go check Cassie's room and make sure all her things are there." Castle soothed her. Kate stuffed her phone in her back pocket ran to Cassie's room. The bed was unmade (not unusual), and her wardrobe and handbag collection didn't look significantly diminished. Kate felt the tension in her shoulders loosen slightly (but not nearly enough for her to call herself relaxed). Her phone rang.

"Cassie?" She answered breathlessly.

"Not quite. I got in contact with Annie. Cassie is on her break right now, but most of the staff have been talking about going out for drinks after the Old Haunt closes. I'll have Annie contact me if Cassie goes with them. Alexis also sent Cassie a text asking if she wants to hang out." Castle told her.

"Thank you, Castle." Kate sighed with relief, running her hand through her hair and stretching her neck.

"Always." Kate couldn't help the smile that crept across her face at the word.

"If I know you at all, Kate Beckett, you're going to wait up all night for Cassie to get home. She's an adult. Go draw yourself a bath, and get some sleep. She'll come home when she's ready." Castle advised her. He could practically hear her hesitance over the phone.

"I mean it. Go sleep." Castle told her. Kate sighed.

"I'll do my best. Thank you for everything, Castle." Kate said quietly. She ended the call, and bit her lip. What she really wanted to do was get into a cab and crawl into Castle's bed. She couldn't do that. She was nowhere near ready for that. Besides, if her argument with Cassie this afternoon was anything to go by, she clearly didn't have a grip on what was happening in reality. After all this time, he couldn't possibly feel the same way.

* * *

Cassie groaned at the sound of her phone ringing. She pulled a pillow onto her head and steadfastly ignored the tinny sound. She breathed a sigh of relief when the phone stopped ringing. She had a thirty second reprieve before the sound started up again. She groaned and picked up the handset without checking the caller ID.

"What?" She growled down the phone. She was hungover like a beast, and she was seriously contemplating reaching down the phone and choking whoever had disturbed her slumber.

"Cassie, where are you?" Kate demanded, voice frantic.

"Who the fuck are you, my mother?" Cassie shot back, pissy that Kate hadn't gotten the hint that she didn't want to talk.

"Cassie, I don't have time for this. Where the hell are you? Are you near Wall Street?"

"Why the hell would I be there? I'm in bed. I only got home…" Cassie consulted her phone for the time "two hours ago. What the fuck is your deal?"

"Cass, a bomb went off this morning." Kate told her quietly. Cassie's jaw dropped.

"What?" Images of burning buildings flashed before Cassie's eyes. She'd been a child when the attacks on the World Trade Centre happened, but the plumes of smoke in the sky, visible from the playground of her elementary school was something that would be burned into her memory until the day she died. Cassie had worked herself into a fit that day, petrified that her sister was going to have to go into the collapsing buildings because she was a cop, and she had to save the day.

"We don't know how many are dead yet, but I know that I'm on the task force to investigate this with the FBI. I just wanted to make sure that you're safe." Kate informed her. "Don't go anywhere near the bomb site today." Kate begged.

"Of course not. Kate, make sure you get the bastards." Cassie said fiercely.

"I always get my guy," Kate answered with a bravado that she really didn't feel.

"And Kate…" Cassie added, hesitance heavy in her tone. "Don't be a hero." She begged. Kate ended the call and looked at her team.

"Let's nail this asshole." She declared.

* * *

**So... As a writer, I'm a rather insecure beast. This is a world that I'm really quite new to, and I don't really know if I'm hitting the nail on the head with my writing. With that being said, it means that I'm finding it quite difficult to keep up the motivation to write, especially because I don't know what my readers are thinking. According to my traffic stats, chapter three got over 400 hits, and only four reviews. First of all, thank you SO much to the people that took the time to review. It means the world to me and then some. To those who have been reading, I really am flattered, but I would love it more than anything if you took a couple of minutes out of your day to tell me what you think (especially because I'm starting to get a little bit angsty, which is a bit scary).**

**Until chapter five...**


	5. Chapter 5

**I was SO super flattered by the amazing response to the last chapter! I think I've replied to nearly everyone (and if I haven't yet, I will! Promise!). Your responses were so lovely... I was quite scared to show what I think is Jim Beckett's darker side... especially because I do actually really like him as a character!**

**I'm breaking a personal rule with this chapter... With this fic, I didn't want to upload a new chapter until I had the next one written... So I shouldn't actually be putting this up until I finish chapter six.. But because I will be NOWHERE near my computer this weekend (I'm heading down to Sydney tomorrow afternoon straight from school to see a play, then I'm off to my parents place and then partying for my birthday), and I love you all so dearly... I wanted to give you something for the weekend :D So enjoy the rule breaking ;)**

**Disclaimer: The characters of Castle would make an excellent birthday present. But for now I only own Cassie. **

* * *

Cassie tapped lightly at the door to the office at the Old Haunt.

"C'mon in Cass," Annie greeted her. Cassie walked in and observed the mountains of paperwork around the room. Annie gave her a tired smile. "What can I do ya for, kid?" She asked.

"I'm just clocking off now, and I figured that because I'm heading over to meet Alexis that I'd ask if there was anything you need dropped over to Mr. C while I'm there?" Cassie offered, running her finger along the mantelpiece of the fireplace as she spoke.

"Cassie, I think you just saved my sanity. Can you just take these files…" Annie dumped three enormous wads of paper into Cassie's unsuspecting arms "… and ask him to sign all the spots that I've marked out for him?" Annie yawned loudly.

"You're earning your paycheck this month, aren't you?" Cassie asked as she balanced the files in her arms.

"That time of year, I'm afraid. Insurance time, we've got our annual health and safety checks, and we're working on bringing in all the changes that Mr. C wanted when he bought the place." Annie told her. "Thank you so much for taking all that paperwork for me. I might actually see my bed before midnight tonight."

Cassie waved goodbye and headed out the door. There was no way she was even going to attempt to walk to the Castle loft carrying the small forest of paperwork that was slowly but surely sending her arms numb. She fluttered her eyelashes at Lou, the new security guard (a gentle giant; but none of the drunks needed to know that), and within minutes, she was sitting in a cab.

* * *

She had just made it through bumper-to-bumper traffic and had hit the button for the Castle loft when her phone buzzed. Cassie carefully shifted the stack of paperwork to one arm and pulled her phone out.

"_I am SO sorry! Still have a little more work to do before I can leave the morgue. Extra paperwork with all the bombing victims. Shouldn't be too long. Gram is home, so you don't have to wait in the streets =D"_ Cassie shook her head and chuckled. Alexis really needed to not stress so much. She stepped out of the elevator and headed toward the Castle loft. She giggled when she could hear strains from _Everything's Coming Up Roses_ echoing throughout the corridor. She had yet to actually meet the Rodgers/Castle Matriarch, but Cassie had nothing but the highest expectations for the illustrious Martha Rodgers. She hit the buzzer on the door.

"_Honey, everything's coming up roses and daffodils!__  
__Everything's coming up sunshine and Santa Claus!__  
__Everything's gonna be bright lights and lollipops!__  
__Everything's coming up roses for me and for you!"_ Martha let the final notes of her song ring out for the entire floor to hear, before fixing Cassie with a wide grin.

"Now, you must be the baby Beckett I've heard so much about. Come on in, Kiddo." Martha hustled Cassie into the loft, seemingly heedless of the green mask smeared on her face. Her matching leopard print dressing gown and turban may well have been a one of a kind designer gown, judging by the elegant way Martha carried herself.

"Throw those files down, and come and indulge with me." Martha led Cassie to the breakfast bar, and pulled down two red wine glasses. Before Cassie could object, Martha had poured two generous servings of Merlot, handing one over with a flourish. Cassie observed that Martha couldn't do much without a flourish.

"Red wine is good for the old ticker, and drinking alone is just no fun at all." Martha declared. Cassie tapped her glass against Martha's with a grin.

"Peter, Paul, and Mary you are fabulous." Cassie breathed.

"I'll drink to that, baby." Martha rumbled.

"Now tell me, you've been living all over the world, is that right?" Martha asked. Cassie nodded.

"True story. I did most of my travel by train though, so I don't have the cool stamps on my passport to show for it." Cassie answered.

"Did you see much theatre on the West End?" Martha enquired. Cassie shrugged.

"Some. I took the girl I au paired for to _Wicked _a few times, and I saw a few other classics like _Les Mis_ and _Sweeney Todd._ Other than that, a little bit of Shakespeare. Have you ever played on the West End?" Cassie asked.

"Oh, honey, did I ever…" Martha answered. With that, she began regaling Cassie with stories about the backstage shenanigans from her theatrical heydays. Cassie couldn't stop her giggles (although Martha's generous servings of wine probably didn't help that), and she exchanged a few stories of her own (including the time she snuck backstage to see at friend at the Moulin Rouge) when the timer on the oven buzzed.

"Sorry kiddo, but I've gotta take this muck off my face before it burns my skin clean off." Martha told her apologetically.

"Go right ahead. Where can I put this paperwork for Castle?" Cassie asked, picking up the bundle of papers that she'd abandoned in favour of wine.

"His office is the second door on the left. Just put it on his desk." Martha called over her shoulder as she sashayed up the stairs. Cassie wandered into Castle's office, and dumped the paperwork onto his desk with a rather unladylike grunt. She couldn't help but be in awe of being in the space that had given birth to Nikki Heat and Derrick Storm (and yes, she had read all of Castle's novels. She'd given in after hearing Kate rave about them, and they were a lifesaver on cross-country train trips). Cassie went to leave the room, and in a move that betrayed her "I'm mostly sober, I swear" state, Cassie tripped and knocked over a remote that was sitting on the edge of Castle's desk.

"Fuck." She muttered, skidding after the remote. She picked it up, popped the batteries back in and frantically checked it to make sure that it appeared relatively unharmed. She put it back on the desk and crossed her arms immediately. She made a beeline for the door, but the gentle glow from the smart board caught her eye. Cassie did not share her sister's dedication to avoiding spoilers from the books, and Cassie was comfortable enough with herself to admit that she wanted a sneak peek into _Frozen Heat._ Cassie's jaw dropped when she saw what was on the board.

"Mother, do you not remember me telling you that I moved your stationery equipment out of my study and into the hall closet?" Castle called out as he came up to the doorway of the room. Cassie pivoted around on the balls of her feet.

"What the fuck is that?" She whispered. Castle's eyes flicked over to the interactive white board. He paled.

"I don't know what the fuck you were thinking. I know you and my sister have this weird, we won't talk about our feelings, let's live in a quasi-relationship thing going on, but I am telling you right now, this crosses the line. This crosses the line so hard and fast that I don't even know where the line is any more. That is my _mother_, not some game for you to entertain yourself with." Cassie spat. She waited for Castle to defend himself. Insist that she had misinterpreted the whole thing. She got nothing.

"Kate trusts you, Rick. She fucking trusts you! That case nearly killed her, and you think you have the right to stick your nose in it? I'm telling her. I'll tell her every goddamn thing." Cassie raged, storming toward the door. Castle caught her arm on the way out.

"Cassie. You can't tell her." He implored her.

"The hell I can't." Cassie snapped, wrenching her arm from his grip.

"Cassandra. You tell her about this, and she will end up dead." Castle told her bluntly. He put his hand on her shoulder, and carted her into the office, shutting the door behind him. He told Cassie everything. Kate shooting Johanna's assassin. Lockwood. Montgomery's dirty past. The terror he felt at the funeral. The shadowy phone calls and secret meetings.

"You see it, don't you? You see why you can't tell her?" Castle begged. Cassie felt sick to her stomach. She leaned forward and pressed her forehead to her knees, willing her roiling emotions to cease.

"I won't tell her. But you have to. If she finds out you've been keeping this from her, she will _never_ forgive you." Cassie warned him. She scratched at her arms, trying to scrape away the sticky feeling on her skin.

"I'm sorry, can you tell Alexis I can't hang out tonight? I need to go shave my skin off." Cassie muttered, before picking up her handbag and running out of the loft.

* * *

Cassie stood at the door of the apartment. She drew a deep breath and willed her inner turmoil off her face. She couldn't have even a hint of conflict in her demeanour. She knew that if she gave Kate even the slightest indication something was wrong, it wouldn't take long for Kate to pry the secrets out of her. They hadn't properly seen each other since their argument, and Cassie knew she had some apologising to do for the Houdini act she'd pulled (and she was totally expecting Kate to throw things at her for being such an unmitigated douchebag)

She took a deep breath, and unlocked the door. She raised an eyebrow when she saw Kate, clad in pyjamas, sitting on the couch, viciously attacking a tub of Ben and Jerry's with a spoon. She looked up at Cassie miserably.

"Some days I hate my job." Kate moped through a mouthful of ice cream. Cassie dropped her keys into the bowl at the door and flopped down next to her, accepting the proffered tub and spoon. She took a huge mouthful of coffee ice cream. Kate sighed heavily, snatching the ice cream back.

"If we're gonna sit around and be miserable, let me do it properly and put on my pyjamas." Cassie said. She stood up, and walked to her room to change out of her work clothes into her baggie Minnie Mouse pj pants and an old t-shirt with Turkish writing across the front. She walked back into the living room, via the antique tea trolley that was serving as their liquor cabinet. She picked up an unopened bottle of red wine and cracked the seal. She gracelessly sat on the couch with a thump, and took a healthy swig from the bottle. She wordlessly offered the bottle to Kate. Kate let out a mirthless chuckle.

"Classy, Cass." She teased. Cassie gave her a look and took another long mouthful. Kate dumped the ice cream on the coffee table and took the bottle. Cassie waited for the alcohol to loosen Kate's tongue.

"They set up the bomb to add some spice to their story. What sick asshole does that? There was a nuclear freaking threat to the city not even a year ago." Kate vented. She took another mouthful of wine, before handing the bottle to Cassie. "You don't mess with that stuff. Not in New York City. Haven't people suffered enough without people being assholes like that?" Kate wondered.

Cassie squeezed her thigh sympathetically. Kate shuddered as she forced the images of charred bodies to disappear. "It's cases like these that make me regret becoming a cop." Kate admitted quietly. Cassie knew that she wasn't expected to say anything; this was Kate's personal brand of therapy. Cassie took another drink, before handing the bottle back. Cassie leaned her head on Kate's shoulder.

"What's got your face looking like a cat's ass?" Kate asked.

"I was such a bitch to you. I shouldn't have run out like that. And then I had a truly crappy day." Cassie said, desperately hoping her evasions were going unnoticed.

"Hey, that fight was just as much my fault as it was yours. I have no idea what happened between you and Dad, and I have to respect that you're capable of making your own decisions, whether I like them or not." Kate responded. She wrapped her arm around Cassie's shoulders and pulled her into an embrace.

"What happened at work?" Kate asked. Cassie bit her lip before answering; desperately praying her voice would remain steady.

"Oh you know… guys thinking that you pouring them one beer means they can make dirty comments about head, and grab your ass. Nothing I haven't dealt with before." Cassie lied.

"Head?" Kate asked, mind immediately slipping to the obvious.

"The foam at the top of the beer. That's the head. And I give excellent, excellent…head." Cassie joked, a spark of her cheeky nature slipping back into her tone. She picked the bottle back up and took a mouthful. She offered it to Kate. Kate shook her head.

"That is it." Kate decided. She marched over and took out two wine glasses.

"We are not going to sit on the couch, drinking wine from the bottle like savages, feeling sorry for ourselves. Get up." Kate ordered. Cassie stood up with a huff, watching Kate drag the coffee table to the side of the room and connect her iPod to the dock and hit play. Cassie grinned.

"Oh you are not." She gasped as the opening strains of _Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go_ started playing.

"Oh, but I am." Kate replied, grabbing Cassie and pulling her over. It didn't take Kate long to demonstrate that she still knew every single step to the Wham classic. Cassie laughed and joined in. Dance parties had a long and sacred history in the Beckett household. Some of Cassie's earliest memories were of her Mom and sister holding her hands and dancing with her in the living room of her childhood home. She and Kate had made it their mission to nail the dance moves from as many classic music videos as possible. Cassie had been five when she'd learnt every single move to _Thriller._ Cassie Vogued her way to the stereo and plugged her iPod in. Kate frowned when she heard the opening to the song.

"Cass, I don't know this one…" She said hesitantly. Cassie shook her head.

"You don't need to. He'll tell you what to do." Cassie told her, grabbing Kate to stand next to her.

"_To the left_," Cassie began dancing to the left, pulling Kate along with her as she sang along

"_Take it back now ya'll_" Cassie pointed behind her as she began to step back in time with the music.

"_One hop this time,"_ Kate let out a giggle as she hopped completely out of time with Cassie.

"_Right foot let's stomp, left foot let's stomp_," Cassie winked at her sister when it seemed she finally had the hang of the magic of the _Cha Cha Slide._

"_Cha Cha real smooth_" Cassie grabbed Kate's hand and pulled her into an impromptu cha cha position.

"Where did you learn this?" Kate asked as they both moved to the right.

"England. I used to dance it out with Charlotte and Pierre regularly. One night I was supervising a school disco night for Charlie, and this song came on. She loved it, and we spent the next day searching iTunes for it. I became the coolest nanny in London when I found it." Cassie answered.

"As if you weren't the coolest nanny anyway." Kate joked. Cassie shook her head.

"Pierre was three, so it didn't take too much for him to warm up to me. But Charlotte hated me for months." Cassie remembered fondly. "She _hated_ me. There was some bullying going on at school. It never had anything to do with her, but one day the biggest bully picked on the kid who had a few special needs. Charlie saw red and punched the bully. She got suspended, and she came home to ice cream for dinner." Cassie recalled as the song asked them to clap their hands.

"You fed the kid ice cream after she got suspended?" Kate gaped.

"Of course. The kid she punched was a terror. I was proud of her for standing up for the kid who couldn't stand up for himself. Her dad was cool with it. We spent her suspension on the couch, watching some space cowboy TV show she liked."

"Remind me to never leave you alone with my kids."

"I am highly offended by that insinuation. I have sterling references, thank you very much, and I have every intention of taking my nieces to Paris for their thirteenth birthdays." Cassie responded primly, nose poked into the air, a slight British accent dancing across her words.

"Are you planning on okay-ing that with me before you kidnap them?" Kate asked, as Cassie's iPod changed to _Love is a Battlefield_.

"Are you really going to complain about me freeing you from the presence of a thirteen year old girl? Not that it's going to happen any time soon." Cassie teased. Kate took a long swig of her wine.

"Castle was really weird today." She admitted quietly. Cassie turned the music down slightly.

"What do you mean?" Cassie asked, desperately praying her tone sounded light and curious, and not giving away any of her knowledge of Castle's motives.

"He was really distant. I invited him out for a drink after the case, and he just… completely dismissed me. He's never been so cold towards me. I thought he was harsh after last summer. And he was strange when I was with Josh, but never like this." Kate confessed.

"Urgh, are you talking about Motorcycle Boy? He was weird because that guy looks like he could unhinge his jaw and eat the souls of small children. Katie, the guy was a douche, and Castle was probably just trying to be nice and not tell you to ditch him. Which is what I would have done." Cassie said bluntly. She sauntered over to where her phone was lying, and quickly typed a text messaged to Alexis.

**RED ALERT! RED ALERT! MAYDAY! MAYDAY! SOS OPERATION CASKETT! MUST CONFER. URGENT! URGENT! **

"I… I just feel like I might be getting there. Like I'm getting close to where I want to be. I'm so close, and he can't give up on me now." Kate admitted with a soft sigh. Cassie squeezed her shoulder.

"He probably just has PMS. I wouldn't freak out over it just yet." Cassie reassured her. She picked up her wine glass and swallowed the remaining liquid in a single mouthful. She flicked through her iPod before choosing a new track. She pulled Kate to the centre of the living room.

"But for now, we dance." Cassie declared over the opening strains of Florence and the Machine.

* * *

**And once again, thank you SO much to the beautiful Tad for taking time to beta this chap while her Mama was visiting, and she was in the midst of assignment overload. I love you!**

**I also did a short shuffle challenge fic if you want to take a look... It's called _Cut and Shuffle._**

**Reviews make excellent birthday presents...**


	6. Chapter 6

**Here we go guys. Chapter 6 :) Thanks for the birthday wishes kids, they mean a lot :)**

**Also, I'm going to do one shots for reviewers. Castlecastle, you were reviewer 50, so send me a PM with a prompt, and I'll get right to work.**

**As always, a massive thanks to Tad. You rock my world, and I'm still waiting on those superpowers.**

**I don't think the owners of Castle have 3 sets of logbooks to mark. I do. **

* * *

Cassie dressed in all black for the occasion. She stood in the shade of a large tree; Jackie O sunglasses on her face, faded purple hair twisted under a fedora, and sent a covert text message.

**I'm busting you out, Ginger Snap. Who do I need to distract?** She shoved her phone back into her pocket, attempting to look casual.

**Ginger Snap? I only take two classes this semester. I'm set to leave in 10 and head to the morgue.** Alexis replied. Cassie huffed, before shooting off a text message.

**Conferred with Chocolate Truffle. Your presence is not required at the morgue. Urgent meeting needed re: Operation Caskett. Berry Pavlova, over. **

**I don't understand why you keep talking about dessert. **

**Code-names, Ginger Snap. Just meet me at the front gate. Berry Pavlova, out.**

Cassie shoved her phone into her bag, and caught sight of Alexis's red hair as she walked out of the school gates.

"You really need to learn how to play along." Cassie complained as Alexis crossed the street to greet Cassie.

"Code names? You have spent way too much time around my Dad." Alexis asked by way of greeting. Cassie nodded enthusiastically.

"Don't pretend that you don't love the idea." Alexis raised an eyebrow.

"If we are going to do this, we are doing it right." Cassie told her.

"Fine...But I don't actually know what pavlova is." Alexis admitted. Cassie slung an arm around her as they began to walk down the street.

"Aussie dessert named after a Russian ballerina. Meringue cake, fruit and cream on top. Deliciousness in a bowl." Cassie replied. "I figure we set up base at my place. Kate is elbow deep in a case, and I probably won't see her for another few days."

"She really is a workaholic, isn't she?"

"Oh, I'll end up going down to the precinct, loaded up with food I know she can't say no to so that I can be sure that she actually eats." Cassie answered, perfectly blasé. She ushered Alexis out of the elevator, and into their apartment.

"You probably don't want to sit around in your school uniform, so feel free to help yourself to my wardrobe. Anything you see is free game." Cassie called out as she headed into the kitchen.

Alexis stepped into Cassie's room and forgot all about clothes when she saw the centrepiece of Cassie's room. The top half of all four of Cassie's walls had been completely covered by photographs, drawings, posters, stubs of tickets, postcards and paintings. Alexis took her time investigating them all. There were the stereotypical shots of Cassie next to the Eiffel Tower and Sydney Harbour Bridge, as well as various photos of people she'd travelled with over the years. There was a striking image of Cassie taken in black and white, her head bowed as she leaned against what remained of the Berlin Wall.

"You decent?" Cassie asked as she skidded into the room, hand clamped over her eyes.

"Your photos are amazing." Alexis breathed. Cassie smiled. Alexis pointed to one image. Cassie was on the shoulders of an incredibly tall guy, in a mosh pit, arms outstretched, gripping the hands of a singer.

"Is that Jay-Z?" Alexis asked incredulously. Cassie nodded; her faded purple curls bouncing.

"Funny story." She began. Alexis waved her on. "It was in Sydney. My housemates and I blew like $500 each on tickets to see U2. We were so close. Like, I'm pretty sure Bono spat as he was singing _I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For_ and it hit me in the face close. It was amazeballs." Cassie let out a little sigh.

"We were chatting to the people next to us before the show started. First rule of a mosh pit, girls make friends with guys so they don't get killed. These guys heard my accent, and we eventually got to talking about being from New York." Cassie continued.

"Anyhoo. Jay-Z, for whatever weird ass reason, was the support act. He came out, and he was fucking mental. Like, _so_ crazy good. He started playing _Empire State of Mind_, and I freaked. I'm pretty freaking psycho at concerts, but like, I went batshit-fucking cray cray. This guy grabbed me and put me on his shoulders. Jay-Z was rapping away, and came over towards where we were standing. Without even realising what I was doing, I started screaming 'I'm a New Yorker' at the top of my fucking lungs. He came over to me, and grabbed my hand as he was revving the crowd during the bridge." Cassie concluded.

"And your friend managed to get a photo?" Alexis gaped. Cassie shook her head.

"That's the funny part. Some other random got the photo. After Jay-Z finished his set, she showed me. We swapped emails on the spot."

"That is so cool." Alexis groaned.

"The funniest part is… I didn't even LIKE Jay-Z before then."

"Of course you didn't." Alexis said with a slight eye roll.

"So did you want something to change into?" Cassie asked.

"Yeah, that would actually be great." Alexis replied. Cassie rummaged through her drawers and pulled out a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt with a koala wearing overalls on it.

"Did you get to hold a koala bear?" Alexis asked.

"They don't exist." Cassie answered. Alexis frowned as she spotted a photo of Cassie, clad in a white maxi dress, a wide smile on her face and furry grey animal pressed against her chest.

"Are you sure? What are you holding there then?" Alexis asked. Cassie shrugged.

"Oh, koalas exist, but they aren't bears. Technically, they're marsupials, a family of animals found primarily in Australia, their distinctive feature a pouch to protect their young. Other examples of the species include kangaroos, wombats and bandicoots." Cassie recited with the false cheer of a tour guide, plopping down on her bed.

"Sounds like you enjoyed the tour." Alexis teased as she stepped behind Cassie's closet to change.

"Oh, my roommates had so much fun exposing me to Tourism Australia. That photo was taken at a wildlife park about an hour and a half north of Sydney. It was pretty cool. You can see all different Australian animals, and tame kangaroos and emus like wander around the grounds so you can pet them." Cassie recalled.

"I never did see a drop bear though." Cassie pondered. Alexis stepped out from behind the closet.

"Didn't you live in the city though?" Alexis asked.

"In a place called Newtown, and let me tell you, I was most disappointed to discover that kangaroos are in fact not a regular mode of transportation for the average Australian. Pop culture lied to me. It was the ultimate betrayal." Alexis raised an eyebrow at her.

"Did you really think that Australians rode kangaroos?" Alexis asked doubtfully.

"I saw plenty of people in Paris carrying baguettes and walking poodles. Cultural stereotypes exist for a reason, Alexis." Cassie reminded her with a hint of quasi-condescension in her tone as she pulled Alexis onto the bed.

"So. Operation Caskett. Talk to me Berry Pavlova."

"Oh, so now you're down with code names." Cassie complained. She gathered her thoughts before speaking. "I don't know. I just have this feeling that something has shifted. Kate's been really down lately." Cassie said.

"Dad's been weird too. He went on a European book tour a week and a half ago out of nowhere. I think the whole thing was organised in about a week or something. I don't even know when he's supposed to get back." Alexis commented.

"I'm telling you, something has shifted in the dynamic. We need to know what it is. Is there anything from your end that could give it away?" Cassie pondered.

Alexis sighed. "Ok, don't judge me, but I accidentally, totally not on purpose overheard what I'm sure was a private conversation between Gram and Dad when they were raiding the good liquor cabinet. Dad kept repeating the same thing. 'All this time, and she knew'. I had no idea what it meant, but I'm starting to think it might be the key." Alexis realised.

"Oh, fuck." Cassie groaned, sitting up. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!"

"What?" Alexis asked, shocked at Cassie's language.

"Oh this is bad. This is so fucking bad. Ublyudok derʹmo mudak trakhaet suku!" (Motherfucker shit asshole bitch fuck) Cassie cursed.

"When Katya got shot, your Dad decided it would be a good time to confess his undying love for my sister. Naturally, when Kate pulled through, she figured that it was heat of the moment, didn't want to hold him to anything, told him she didn't remember. Fuck." Cassie pieced together for Alexis.

"That happened months ago. What changed?" Alexis wondered.

"Kate told me one of the suspects she was interrogating tried telling her that he couldn't remember anything because he was traumatised by the experience. Kate was significantly less than impressed and tore the guy a new asshole about traumatic experiences. Your Dad must have overheard." Cassie realised.

"Oh, not good." Alexis muttered, eyes wide.

"You have no idea how bad this is. Kate's deal is that she realises that she's madly in love with him, but refuses to chase it because she's convinced that she's completely and utterly screwed up."

"Right…"

"Hey, this is her logic, not mine." Cassie defended. "I think her whole mentality has been that your Dad doesn't really want her, and he couldn't possibly feel the same way. Clearly, we know that he does, because he hasn't left her damn side, when really, he has more than enough research for Nikki Heat. In essence, he's been acting like a security barrier the whole time." Cassie surmised.

"She's close. She's so close. She's almost where she wants to be, and your Dad has decided now that he can't do this anymore. Karma, thou art a heartless bitch." Cassie lamented.

"Cassie, be fair. My Dad loves Kate. He loves her like he never loved my Mom, or Gina. What would you do if you found out a secret like that?" Alexis challenged.

"Secrets are bad. They are so bad. Oh God." Cassie muttered. "We need them to come clean. They both just need to come clean."

"Come clean from what?" Alexis asked. Cassie sighed. She didn't know how much Alexis knew, and she knew that Alexis probably wouldn't want to know the details.

"Part of why your Dad is still at the precinct is because he's scared that Katie is going to start investigating Mom's death again. But Katie doesn't know that." Cassie phrased carefully.

"Oh."

"And when she finds out, I'm pretty sure she's going to attempt to cut off his balls and feed them to him." Cassie concluded. Alexis flopped back onto Cassie's pillows. Alexis sighed.

"Should we really be doing this?" Alexis asked.

"Doing what?"

"This sneaking around. I don't know… it just feels…" Alexis paused as she searched for the right word, "…it feels a little unethical."

"Explain…" Cassie asked

"I don't really know how to express it. I feel like maybe this isn't any of our business. Maybe we should just leave them alone to figure it out." Cassie pondered Alexis's words.

"I can't speak for you, Alexis, but I need to do this for my sister. I know her. She has spent her whole life on a mission, and she won't stop and think of herself for two damn minutes. She's taken the weight of the world on her shoulders since we lost Mama, and she doesn't know how to let herself be happy, because she's waiting for the other shoe to drop onto her head and knock her out. And Kate deserves to be happy, whether she believes it or not."

"Does my Dad really make her happy?" Alexis asked. Cassie grinned.

"Babe, you mention his name around her and her whole demeanour changes. It's like the weight she carries around on her shoulders lightens, and she can finally stand straight. He's her one and done, and she just needs to trust that she deserves to have it." Cassie said earnestly.

"It's like my Dad has this switch in him. So much as mention Kate, and the switch flicks, and he's practically glowing like a supernova. I've never, ever seen him like this. When Dad is in his Kate zone, he looks how a romance novel makes you feel." Alexis daydreamed.

"So you see why we have to do this?" Cassie asked. Alexis nodded.

"Matchmaking always seemed like so much fun in books." She groaned.

"Oh, I agree. Why can't people be normal and healthy, and just admit when they have feelings for each other?"

"Because then we couldn't have covert operations to get them together?" Alexis suggested.

"True." Cassie twisted a lock of hair around her finger, before biting her lip mischievously.

"Alexis…would you say that you're a brave person?" Alexis looked over at Cassie.

"If there is a spider, I will scream loud enough to wake the dead." Alexis warned her. Cassie rolled off the bed and moved to her chest of drawers.

"Oh relax, nothing like that." Cassie assured her. She turned around holding several tubes and a pair of hairdressing gloves.

"No. No way!" Alexis warned her, wide eyed.

"Oh relax. I'm not going to touch your hair. I just can't reach the back of mine." Cassie reassured her.

"Are you kidding me? I can't dye your hair!"

"Why not?"

"What if you hate it?" Alexis squeaked.

"I'll wash it out with dish soap. Alexis, this is totally not a big deal. C'mon, be brave." Cassie cajoled her. Alexis cringed.

"Promise you won't hate me…" She asked. Cassie snorted.

"Lex, this is exactly like finger painting. But for hair."

* * *

Cassie walked out of the bathroom, running her fingers through her technicolour hair.

"Alexis Castle, you are a hairdressing goddess and I bow humbly at your feet." Cassie declared. Alexis had managed to artfully weave pink, purple and teal highlights through the lengths of Cassie's hair to create a curly mess of colour.

"You really like it?" Alexis confirmed.

"Oh, kid, you've just made yourself my permanent hairdresser. Good work."

"It was a total fluke." Alexis assured her.

"Now, now. Don't go selling yourself short." Cassie said teasingly.

"I nearly gave myself a hernia doing it. You're on your own next time." Alexis informed her firmly. Cassie gave a heavy sigh, before flopping onto the couch.

"Fiiiine."

"So, did you have plans for today? You know, aside from kidnapping me to discuss the sorrowful state of our matchmaking scheme?" Alexis asked. Cassie shrugged.

"Might play my guitar. Going to make macaroons, if you wanna help?" Cassie suggested. Alexis shrugged.

"Why not? I warn you, I'm the dessert queen of the Castle household." Cassie stood up and tossed Alexis an apron.

"You're on ganache duty." Cassie said with a grin, as Alexis followed her to the kitchen. Alexis sat stool at the breakfast bar as Cassie pulled out a well-worn cookbook and flipped through the slightly food spattered pages, hastily shoving fallen out pages back into the book. She found the page she was after and began quietly reading aloud to herself in French.

"Exactly how many languages do you speak?" Alexis asked incredulously. Cassie blushed.

"Was I speaking out loud then?" She wondered. Alexis nodded. Cassie bit her lip as she fished out Kate's (barely used) food processor and began to set it up.

"Russian was my first language. I had a little bit of English, but I didn't really start using it until I got to school." Cassie explained as she fiddled through the pantry, pulling out all the ingredients she needed. She began measuring almond meal and icing sugar, before placing it into the food processor, and began to pulse the machine to combine the ingredients.

"I can have a conversation in Italian, particularly if you want to talk about coffee, my German was fairly good at one stage, but because I haven't used it in so long, it's probably all gone. A smattering of Romanian, Turkish and Greek. I'm fluent in French, but I speak it with a British accent." Cassie told Alexis, adding raspberry powder to the food processor and turning it on to combine.

"An English accent? How does that work?"

"Well, usually, when you au pair, it's expected that the family you stay with give you time off every week to go do a language class for the national language of the country." Cassie began. She measured out some castor sugar and added red colouring powder.

"Clearly, that wasn't really an issue when I was living in a townhouse that overlooked Hyde Park. However, the guy I was working for was a single dad. His wife had recently lost a battle with cancer." Alexis's face morphed into a mask of sympathy, as she placed chocolate over a pot of water to melt.

"His late wife had been French, and they'd both been working hard to make sure that their kids grew up speaking both French and English. I'd taken a little bit of French at school, so I offered to go to French classes while I was there so I could continue speaking it at home with the kids." Cassie continued with the story.

"I guess I have an ear for languages, so I picked it up pretty quickly, but when I was doing most of my learning, I was hearing it being spoken by Brits, and I'd just picked up the accent without meaning to. It wasn't until I got to Paris that somebody told me I spoke French like a _Rosbif."_ Cassie finished.

"So, you're totally fluent in French, now?" Alexis confirmed, carefully stirring cream into the melting chocolate. Cassie looked up from where she was separating eggs.

"I speak and understand it aurally far better than I can read and write it. I can write an email in French, and I could probably read a fairly basic novel, but I don't think I could handle writing an essay or anything. But I'd definitely call myself fluent."

"That is so cool." Alexis sighed, turning off the heat of the stove. Cassie smiled from where she was beginning to whip egg whites, and gestured for Alexis to come over.

"This you can help with. When I tell you, add a tablespoon full of the sugar to the eggs."

* * *

Kate walked through the door to find Cassie and Alexis sitting at the dining room table, smearing macaroons with homemade raspberry jam and dark chocolate ganache, before sandwiching the two halves together.

"Aren't you supposed to be at work, Cass?" Kate asked.

Cassie frowned. "I don't want to talk about it." She muttered.

Kate sighed. "You didn't get fired, did you?" She demanded.

Cassie's jaw dropped. "I did NOT get fired. And for that, no macaroons for you. I am offended by that accusation." Cassie glared at her sister, before pulling the plate of treats closer to her. Kate raised an eyebrow.

"Annie said I had to take a few days off, after she worked out that I pulled five double shifts in a row and stayed back to do cellar with the boys. She claims I'm making all the other staff look bad." Cassie revealed through clenched teeth. Alexis burst out laughing.

"Apparently being a workaholic runs in the family." Alexis giggled.

"I do my job, and I do it well. I can't help it that half those guys had no idea how to stock a bar, let alone blow out the beer lines." Cassie complained, "And yes, that is what she said. I cannot help that I work with idiots, and if I want something done right, I have to do it myself." Cassie punctuated her rant with biting into a macaroon.

"You need to own the fact that you're a workaholic." Kate told her soothingly. Cassie rolled her eyes, and attempted to bite Kate as she snagged a cookie from the plate. Alexis looked up from checking her phone.

"I had a great time hanging out with you this afternoon, Cassie, but I'm going to have to head off. I'm meeting some friends for dinner, and I have to go home and change first." Alexis said regretfully.

"No worries, mon petit chou," (My Little Cabbage). Cassie answered easily. She stood up and walked Alexis to the door, asking Alexis if she had everything and shoving a container of macaroons in her hands.

"It was real swell hanging out with you today, Ginger Snap." Alexis pulled Cassie into a hug.

"I really enjoyed myself. And I'm glad we sorted that stuff out." Alexis replied.

"Agreed. We'll catch up soon, sweet." Cassie waved Alexis out the door. She turned around to see Kate eating a macaroon.

"If I didn't know any differently, I'd think you were trying to fatten me up." Kate commented around a mouthful of chocolate and meringue.

"I have no idea where you'd get an idea like that." Cassie answered, false innocence ringing through her tone.

"I'm hanging out with Lanie tonight. She wants pizza, wine and girltalk. Do you want to come?" Kate asked. Cassie shrugged.

"Well, I'm banned from work, so its not like I have anything else planned."

"Ok, get changed and we'll take the macaroons to go. Lanie's gonna be your new best friend." Kate teased, before heading to her room to change.

* * *

**So...there is a picture on my tumblr of Cassie's hair... just check out brookemopolitan. While you're at it, follow me on twitter (same username :D)**

**and please, drop me a review. they're just like Castle giving Beckett coffee :)**


	7. Chapter 7

**I hope I'm not the only one suffering as a result of this *insert naughty word of choice here* hiatus. I JUST WANT MY SHOWS BACK!**

**Also, I had a reviewer ask me a question about how it is that Cassie seems to know so many of Kate and Castle's secrets. I wanted to clarify this a little bit for everyone :) Cassie is the one person that can totally see through Kate's bullshit. It's very much a sister thing... i have four little sisters, and not one of them can lie to me, and the same goes for me to them. I also think that Kate trusts Cassie implicitly as a confidante, especially as Cassie is now an adult with her own set of life experiences, so Kate and Cassie confide in each other pretty heavily.**

On top of that, I think that Cassie (like Kate) is very intuitive. Kate's intuition makes her an excellent cop, and Cassie's intuition makes her able to read between the lines of Castle and Beckett's relationship, and realise what the problems are. Cassie has had her own reaction to the trauma of her mother's death, but she doesn't really have that emotional disconnect and the infamous wall that Kate does, so she's able to see the ways that Kate is emotionally crippled.

**In other news, I didn't receive a PM from my 50th reviewer. With that in mind, I'll choose a review at random from chapter 8, and I'll let you know in your review reply if you are in fact the winner of the golden ticket and you can prompt me for a one shot :)**

**As always... Thanks to the gorgeous Tadpole24 for her beta work... she also wrote me a Castle/Bones crossover for my birthday, and I think you should all check it out. Any Bones fans who might be reading... I've snuck a nice little treat in here for you...enjoy!**

**DisclaimerI have a class set of logbooks to mark, and reports due in two weeks. This is not a problem for the writers of Castle. I've also done some big borrowing of dialogue from the Limey, but I super double promise that I didn't come up wit it**

* * *

Kate and Cassie were greeted with Lanie hugs and an already open bottle of wine when they entered her apartment. Cassie expertly juggled her handbag, the pizza boxes and container of dessert to give Lanie a hug. Cassie was totally stoked to actually be invited along to a girls night. Lanie and Kate had met in their early days as working professionals for the NYPD, and had been fast friends ever since. Cassie had been trying to swing an invite to girls night since she was twelve.

"Give her about twenty minutes for the vino to kick in and we should hear all her Castle related woes." Lanie muttered to Cassie.

"Oh, Chocolate Truffle, how little you know. It's not going to take that long." Cassie whispered back, snagging the wine bottle out of Lanie's hand. Cassie sauntered over to Lanie's dining table and poured generous glasses of wine. Kate hadn't even taken a sip from her glass before her tirade began.

"I am telling you, something happened. Something changed. It's been weird between us lately." Kate ranted. Cassie and Lanie exchanged looks. Cassie took a large mouthful of Merlot and waited. She was going to let Lanie take the reins on this one.

"Lately? It's been weird for four years." Lanie argued. Cassie waited for Kate's classic response, certain that Castle was pulling away.

"Katya, can you blame the guy? He's probably sick of waiting." Cassie hedged into the argument.

"Waiting for what?" Kate suddenly felt the weight of two sets of disapproving eyes on her. She should have known better than to think this wouldn't become a Cassie and Lanie intervention of her love life.

Lanie let out an exasperated sigh. "What do you think? The guy is crazy about you. And despite your little act, you're crazy about him too." Kate shot Cassie an evil glare. It was one thing to admit something to her little sister, but she was far from impressed that Cassie had been spilling her guts to anyone who would listen.

"Was that supposed to be some big secret? Because I didn't say anything. U menya ne bylo v" (I didn't have to) Cassie defended herself. Kate's glare changed from being pissy that her sister had been running her mouth, to pissy that she was failing miserably at playing her cards close to her chest.

"Yes." She declared stubbornly. "No." She admitted to the twin looks of frustration. "Do you think he knows?" Kate asked, cursing mentally as she felt herself regressing back to being a love struck fifteen year old. Thank God Madison hadn't been able to get out of a press something or other to come along tonight. She wouldn't have been able to deal with the mortification if she'd been there to weigh in on the situation as well. She tuned back in to hear Lanie describe the Castle she'd started working with four years ago.

"He's waiting. For _you._" Cassie interjected urgently. She wished she could tell Kate the half of what Castle was doing for her. Keeping her alive, and safe. Kate bit her lip, carefully stringing words together as she allowed the words of her best friend and little sister sink into her psyche.

"But, Lanie…" Kate said quietly.

"I know. You're working through stuff, but how long do you expect the guy to wait? Unless you're ok with him pulling away." Lanie pushed. Cassie could see Kate's defences slowly crumbling.

"What if it doesn't work? What if we end up like you and Javi?" Kate wondered. Cassie scooted closer to Kate, pulling up the sleeve of the shirt she wore under her kaftan, and slipping off her bangles, exposing a tattoo.

"Carpe Diem." Cassie told her sister quietly, nudging Kate's shoulder with her forehead. "Not the most original of tattoos, I'll admit, but the meaning is pretty clear. Carpe Diem, Katie. Make your life extraordinary." Cassie whispered a quote from their mother's favourite movie in a tone eerily reminiscent of Robin Williams.

"And as for me and Javi? Well, at least we gave it a shot, and it didn't work out. Now we can move on, give or take the occasional booty call." Lanie added with a smirk. A smile crept onto Kate's face.

"I just don't want to lose what we have."

"Girl, please, what exactly do you have? Really?"

"A friendship." Kate hedged, not liking the twist in her stomach when she answered. Lanie raised an eyebrow.

"No. What you and I have is a friendship…" Lanie gestured between the two of them. "… What you and Cassie have is sisterhood. What you and Castle have is a holding pattern. How long can you circle before the fuel runs out?"

"Do yourself a favour, Katyusha, and stop pretending that Mom wouldn't totally be kicking your ass for the way you're behaving right now. My Mama didn't raise no coward." Cassie added in, leaning her head on Kate's shoulder. The ringing of Kate's phone broke the silence in the room. After a brief conversation, she hung up and looked over at Lanie.

"A body dropped." She said by way of explanation. Lanie looked at her phone to see an address texted there for her.

"Give me a chance to change my shoes." Lanie said. Kate nodded.

"I want to come." Cassie demanded. Kate raised an eyebrow.

"Everybody else has been to a crime scene. Even Alexis gets to go. This is wildly unfair. Let me come." Cassie complained. Kate sighed.

"Fine. But if you need to throw up, do it away from the body." Kate relented, not really in the headspace to argue.

* * *

Cassie pulled her coat closer around her frame as she ducked under the yellow tape of the crime scene. She had been with her grandparents the day that yellow tape had been the barrier to her mother's body, but a shiver still ran down her spine, unbidden.

"Don't think you got saved by the bell there, Kate Beckett. As your friend, I am not going to let this drop."

"So what, you think I should tell him how I feel?" Kate asked. Cassie quickly tuned back into the conversation.

"Yes." Cassie said emphatically. "You hunt murderers for a living. You can do this." Cassie nearly died when she heard Kate convince herself that she just needed the right time, and resisted the urge to squee and high five Lanie when the M.E told her there was no time like the present. Cassie swivelled around when she heard a car pull up. Castle was in the driver's seat of the flashy red Ferrari, and he wasn't alone. Apparently Castle liked a side of bimbo along with a pair breast implants that were fooling nobody. Her eyes widened, and she followed Lanie when she escaped to inspect the body.

"Has Kate taught you much Russian?" Cassie muttered into her ear.

"Only the really nasty stuff." Lanie answered, equally shell shocked at Castle's tacky entrance.

"That's all you're going to need. Morgaly vikalyu, padla" (I'll poke your eyes out, fucker) Cassie growled viciously over her shoulder at Castle's approaching form as she and Lanie set foot in the hotel room.

"Hey, Lanie, how does it look?" Kate asked, coming to kneel beside the body.

"Like you waited too damn long." Lanie answered, tearing her eyes away from the corpse to eyeball Kate. Kate glared and insisted she was talking about the vic.

"Slovoch." (Bastard), Cassie muttered, staring at the doorframe. Kate shot her a cranky look, and Lanie giggled when she recognised the word. Lanie quickly got a hold of herself and gave Kate a preliminary report on the body. Kate began to speculate about the conditions they found the body in.

"We talking about the victim, or Castle?" Cassie asked, still staring daggers at the doorframe, when the man in question walked in. "Kooshi govno ee oomree." (Eat shit and die) She spat murderously when Castle and his new squeeze approached the body.

"Cassie, stop it." Kate muttered.

"YA budu delatʹ nichego podobnogo. Idi na xuy huesos." (I will do no such thing. Fuck off, cocksucker.) Cassie replied darkly as Castle stopped by the body.

She wasn't even listening to the conversation that took place, but Cassie resisted the urge to bitch slap the tacky looking flight attendant when she interjected.

"Zatknis' na hui, tupitsa suka." (Shut the fuck up, dumbass bitch) Cassie muttered under her breath. She watched Kate barely maintain her poker face at that particular insult, because it was glaringly obvious that Cassie was vocalising the thoughts of ninety percent of the room. Cassie caught the simpering glare of the home-wreaker.

"I'm sorry, my English, it is not so good. I am saying that you are very… what is word? Insightful. The NYPD is lucky to have you here for such marvellous ideas." Cassie's false apology was given in a perfect, thick Russian accent. She even managed to give a remorseful grin, deftly ignoring Castle's suspicious look, waiting to see if he'd call her out on her totally fake accent and apology.

"Right, well, I'm going to head to the morgue and continue my exam on our vic, you guys do your cop thing." Lanie declared, signalling to her assistants to begin moving the body.

"And you, my dear little sister, are going home. Come on, I'll give you a ride before I head to the station." Kate told Cassie firmly, giving her the look that so reminded Cassie of the one her mother would give her when she was caught sneaking candy as a child.

"Chto? Vy dumali , ya prosto govoryu." (What? You were thinking it, I was just saying it.) Cassie defended herself innocently as Kate ferried her away from the crime scene.

* * *

"So, it turns out that our vic was British. We're working in conjunction with Scotland Yard to solve this one." Kate told Cassie over dinner the next evening. Cassie forced herself to swallow her mouthful of food.

"No. No, no, no. No, Kate. I can read your face. This is a bad idea." Cassie told her.

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Don't try and bullshit a bullshit artist, Katie. You're thinking that this guy is kinda cute, and you might just cling to his arm to make Castle jealous. Bad, bad idea." Cassie warned her. Kate sighed.

"Besides the obvious immature trying-to-get-back-at him-with-a-shiny-new-toy crap that this will denigrate to, British men are not very good kissers." Cassie said bluntly.

"And that is your chief concern for me?" Kate asked.

Cassie nodded. "Do you want to drown in his saliva? Like, really? Look at your life, Katie. Look at your choices, and realise, when it comes down to it, you don't want to make this one. What would I tell people at the funeral?"

Kate burst out laughing, before quickly sobering. "I should have told him. I just…I should have told him." Kate admitted. "He hates me now, and he's right to. I knew all along that this wouldn't end well. Either way, I've hurt him." Kate bit her lip to hold back tears. Cassie crossed the table and pulled Kate into the embrace she knew she desperately needed but would never ask for.

"Don't beat yourself up Katie. This goes both ways. He could have said something to you. He needs to man up just as much as you do."

* * *

Cassie was jamming on her guitar in the living room, still banned from work when she fumbled to answer a call.

"I'm gatecrashing a party tonight. Can you bring me a dress from the back of my closet, and my makeup kit?" Kate asked without wasting time on a greeting.

"Are you going with Castle?" Cassie asked as she put her guitar on the couch and stumbling up to Kate's room and flipped through her closet. She dismissed the slightly matronly dress she knew Kate had worn to Ryan's wedding, and the gold and red number from a benefit she'd attended with Castle the first year they'd worked together. Cassie sighed with indignation at the lack of options in Kate's wardrobe, and rushed down to her room.

"No, he has a date." Cassie could hear Kate's eyeroll through the phone. "I'm going with Colin."

"Kate, remember what I told you." Cassie reminded her.

"I've never been one to kiss and tell." Kate responded. Cassie flipped through her wardrobe and stopped at the vintage number she was looking for.

"And that, in a nutshell, is your problem. What is the fun of kissing if you don't tell?"

"Will I see you soon?" Kate asked.

"I'll grab my supplies and meet you at the precinct."

* * *

Cassie barricaded the bathroom in the locker room and turned her attention to Kate. Kate looked over from the dress that Cassie had brought.

"This isn't one of mine."

"I know that, but it is vintage, it is fabulous, and you are going to look like Audrey Hepburn when I am done with you. It is also mine, so damage it and I will rip your throat out with my teeth. Now go change your underwear and sit your ass down." Cassie ordered. Kate bit her lip.

"Do you think it'll cover my chest?" She asked hesitantly. Cassie hadn't even considered that.

"I'm sure it will be fine. I can cover anything up with concealer, otherwise." Cassie reassured her. Kate nodded, before picking up the bundle of undergarments Cassie had brought with her and slipping into a stall to change. She came out, moments later, pulling on the robe that Cassie had thoughtfully thrown in.

"Teperʹ toropitʹsya! Vy ne mozhete toropitʹ geniya!" (Now hurry up! You can't rush genius!) Cassie ordered, gesturing to the seat she'd stolen from the bullpen with a hot and deadly looking curling iron.

* * *

Kate looked at herself in the mirror. Cassie truly was a hair and make up genius. While she'd refused the Audrey inspired updo Cassie had pushed for, her hair was swept into an elegant chignon, a few wisps of hair curled gently around her face. Her mother's favourite diamond earrings hung gracefully, drawing the eye to her cheekbones. Kate inspected the neckline; careful to make sure that the scar marking her chest wasn't on show.

"You look beautiful." Cassie told her earnestly. Kate smiled.

"You really think so?" She asked, slightly bashful. Cassie nodded. She was well aware that Kate worked in an occupation where more often than not, her beauty was a stumbling block rather than a blessing. Cassie pressed a kiss to her cheek, careful not to smudge the makeup that had taken close to an hour to perfect.

"You are radiant. Castle is going to die when he sees what he's missing out on." Cassie whispered. Kate fiddled with the chain around her neck nervously. She slowly removed the necklace, and hung it around Cassie's neck.

"I don't think it matches the outfit." Kate murmured, voice thick with emotion.

"Hey, don't cry. You'll ruin your eyeliner and then I'll have to kick your ass." Cassie joked, hand wrapped firmly around the ring. "I'll take care of it. I promise." Cassie added sincerely. She checked the time. "You're going to be late. Yallah!" Cassie commanded, ushering Kate towards the door.

* * *

Cassie saw the awestruck look on Castle's face when Kate made her slightly hesitant entrance to the bullpen. She watched the awkward conversation between the pair. The tension was rampant. She hated that she couldn't just lock them into a room and refuse to release them until they'd grown the hell up and talked about their problems. Cassie wiped the wand of the espresso machine and walked into the bullpen.

"Is that the tattoo you told me about?" Castle asked, trying to find a way to ease into the teasing tension that was his comfort zone with Kate.

"Nope. That's the one she got with me." Cassie answered for Kate as she marched into the room. "Just looking out for you, big sis. I know you've had a long day." Cassie didn't break eye contact with Castle when she placed a steaming cup of coffee on Kate's desk.

"Thanks, Cass." Kate said gratefully, picking up the cup. "This looks too pretty to drink." She complimented, looking at the perfectly formed peacock that Cassie had created with the foam.

"Don't be silly. It's nothing. I haven't done latte art like that since I was a barista in Roma." Cassie said easily. The look Castle gave her made it clear that he realised that Cassie was laying down the gauntlet. Cassie shot the newcomer in the room a charming grin.

"Well, hello. You must be the Colin Hunt I've heard so much about. I'm Cassie, Kate's cuter and funnier little sister." Cassie introduced herself, certain to be more than a little bit over the top. She turned back to Kate and gestured for her to wipe her upper lip. She handed over a beaded black clutch.

"That should have everything you need. Don't do anything I wouldn't do, and remember what I told you the other night." Cassie said teasingly, shooting Kate a wink. She watched Castle seethe with jealousy as Kate took Hunt's arm and glided elegantly out of the room. Cassie looked over at Castle.

"And to think, if you weren't acting like a twelve year old, she could be on your arm." Cassie sniped. Castle frowned at her.

"Man the fuck up, Castle." Cassie ordered; picking up the equipment she'd brought with her to doll Kate up and striding out of the room.

* * *

Kate staggered into her apartment. The case was closed, she was exhausted and her brilliant idea of going out for a drink with Hunt had been a disaster. She'd quickly bailed, and was grateful to discover that she had the apartment to herself. She was just contemplating a hot bath when there was a knock at the front door. After checking her peephole, she swung the door open.

"Josh?" She asked incredulously. There, in the flesh, was Doctor Motorcycle Boy himself, holding a box at the entry to her apartment.

"Hey Kate. I just got back from Afghanistan, and I realised that I still have a few of your things."

* * *

Kate didn't quite know how, but she found herself sitting at her kitchen table, drinking coffee that she hadn't made, as she listened to Josh tell her Doctors Without Borders stories that she honestly didn't care for, with no idea how to force him out of the apartment. She truly hoped that she had managed to stifle her sigh of relief when she heard the door swing open and Cassie stumble into the apartment.

"Would you excuse me for a moment?" Kate asked Josh, making a beeline for the door. Kate hustled for the door, and grabbed Cassie by the shoulders.

"Help me." She breathed urgently.

"What's wrong?" Cassie asked.

"He's here!"

"Who is?"

"Josh. And keep your voice down!" Kate hissed. Cassie burst into giggles.

"Vy blin, shutishʹ? Malʹchik doktor mototsiklov zdesʹ? Kakoĭ osel." (Are you kidding me? Doctor Motorcycle Boy is here? What a jackass!) Cassie gasped.

"On priglasil sebya, i teperʹ on ne uĭdet. Spravka. menya."(He invited himself in and now he won't leave. Help. Me.) Kate begged.

"Oh, you owe me BIG for this," Cassie cackled. She indicated for Kate to lead the way into the kitchen.

"Oh, Kate, I didn't show you. This is Hannah." Josh held up his phone, and showed Kate an image of a blonde woman. Apparently she was a journalist, who had returned to her focus on stories from the Middle East and Central Asia after spending a short amount of time in DC, and apparently, she'd recently won herself the honour of being Josh's new honey bunny.

"Seems like she'd be in town as often as you are." Kate muttered under her breath. Cassie saw Josh finally notice her. She shot him a devilish grin.

"Hi, we haven't met. I'm Cassandra. I'm Kate's new lesbian lover." She introduced herself with a sugary tone. She gigged as she watched Josh blanch.

"I'm totally fucking with you. I'm her baby sister." Cassie explained. "Oh, did she not mention me?" Cassie asked with the same butter-wouldn't-melt-in-my-mouth expression dancing on her face. She smirked at Josh's slight shake of his head. Cassie pondered, pursing her lips.

"Really, that's not surprising. I'm sure Kate didn't mention a lot of things to you." Cassie soothed him condescendingly. "Like how crappy you are in the sack. Like how she used to regularly fake it, and then finish the job after you were asleep and drooling." Cassie knew where to hit a man where it hurt, and it looked like she was right on target with Josh. "I'm sure she also never told that you were basically a blow up doll." She added conversationally. Cassie's eyes flicked over to Kate, who was watching the showdown with fascinated horror.

"And look, let's face it. Kate is really far too polite to tell you what I'm about to." Cassie came to stand behind where Josh was seated, all pretence at squeaky clean dropped.

"Get the fuck out of my apartment." Cassie growled into his ear. Josh looked over to Kate.

"Do you want to explain what the hell is going on here?" Josh demanded. Kate shrugged.

"I'm pretty sure that Cassie said it all." Kate confirmed, coming to stand next to her sister.

"Look, you seem…" Cassie trailed off. "Yeah, I can't be bothered lying here. You seem like you should own a white van. The fact of the matter is, I just did my nails, and I really don't want to chip them, but I will snap my boots off in your asshole if you do not get the fuck out, now." She shot Josh a deathly glare, her arms crossed and she tapped her foot impatiently as she waited for Josh to get up.

"You know Kate, I was really hoping that we might be able to pick up where we left off." Josh implored.

Kate scoffed. "Why would I want to do that? You have Hannah, now, remember?" She reminded him innocently, hand coming to rest at the service weapon still clipped to her hip. She raised an eyebrow, and looked pointedly at the door.

"Don't let it hit you on the ass on your way out." Cassie glowered as she watched Josh skulk towards the front door. The door slammed with an echoing thud. Kate burst out laughing as she hugged Cassie.

"Where the hell did all of that come from?" She asked.

Cassie shrugged, her face the picture of innocence. "Moya Mama umerla, kogda ya byl malenʹkim, kak vy mozhete ozhidat', chtoby u menya khoroshie manery?" (My Mom died when I was little, how can you expect me to have good manners?)

* * *

**I'm approaching the most stressful time of year for teachers. Please, if you can, shoot me a review? It'll mean the world to me, and probably mean I'll be more likely to go without sleep to get you a new chapter :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**In honour of this being my take on the Headhunters episode, I've added my own little nod to Firefly. See if you can spot it. And if you've yet to see Firefly, take some time out to watch it. It is Joss Whedon perfection (is my fangirl showing?)**

**A massive thank you to Tadpole24, for pointing out to me that I'd missed the mark just a little bit in this chapter. You were right ;)**

**The winner of the prompt for a one shot is the lovely BlindAssassin. Keep your eyes peeled for when I post it :)**

**I'm not a writer on Castle. Nor am I Hayley Williams or Dave Grohl. Can I claim ownership to Australian cultural practice?**

* * *

Cassie sat in the living room, quietly strumming her guitar. She paused for a moment, before plucking out a melody. She played it a second time, experimentally. After a third time, she paused and groaned. She'd forgotten this part of song writing. The lyrics were perfect, but she just couldn't get the music to match it the way she could hear it in her head.

"Look at you Joan Jett," Kate greeted affectionately. Cassie rolled her eyes and began to play opening chords of _I Love Rock and Roll_. Kate stepped out of her high heels with a sigh, and stripped off her coat, before sitting down with Cassie.

"You've been playing a lot lately," Kate commented. Cassie shrugged, inspecting the calluses on the tips of her fingers.

"The guys from the band I used to sing with in Australia are in New York. They've decided to come to the Big Apple to hit the big time. The night that I had to save you from our unwanted houseguest, I'd met up with them for dinner and drinks." Cassie gently began to coax a melody out of the guitar. "I don't know… Hanging out with those guys has made me miss playing music. I felt like I needed to start spending some quality time with Vera here, smashing out some originals," Cassie ran her fingers down the neck of the guitar lovingly. "That, and I'm going stir fucking crazy sitting at home, not being able to work." Cassie's eyes widened. She quickly picked up her pencil, and scrawled down a few of the chords she'd been playing. "Eureka!" She mumbled under her breath.

"You planning on spilling water out of the tub?" Kate asked with a bemused smile.

Cassie shook her head, tucking her pencil behind her ear for safekeeping. "Nope. I think I finally figured out the music to this sucker. It's only taken all afternoon."

"Would you play it for me?" Kate asked. Cassie hesitated. Song writing was an intensely personal experience for her, and she very rarely played complete songs for people, let alone song she was still trying to figure out.

"Promise you won't laugh if it sucks?"

"Never."

Cassie drew a deep breath, counted herself in and began to pluck the melody she'd just managed to scrawl down.

_I'm going away for a while__  
__But I'll be back, don't try and follow me__  
__Cause I'll return as soon as possible__  
__See I'm trying to find my place__  
__But it might not be here where I feel safe__  
__We all learn to make mistakes_

_And run__  
__From them, from them__  
__With no direction__  
__We'll run from them, from them__  
__With no conviction_

_Cause I'm just one of those ghosts__  
__Traveling endlessly__  
__Don't need no roads__  
__In fact they follow me_

_And we just go in circles_

_Well now I'm told that this is life__  
__And pain is just a simple compromise__  
__So we can get what we want out of it__  
__Would someone care to classify,__  
__Our broken hearts and twisted minds__  
__So I can find someone to rely on_

_And run__  
__To them, to them__  
__Full speed ahead__  
__Oh you are not, useless__  
__We are just_

_Misguided ghosts__  
__Traveling endlessly__  
__The ones we trusted the most__  
__Pushed us far away__  
__And there's no one road__  
__And we should not be the same__  
__But I'm just a ghost__  
__And still they echo me_

_They echo me in circles  
_

Cassie looked up from the coffee table where her lyrics sat to look into Kate's glassy eyes. "Oh come on, it wasn't that bad, was it?" Cassie joked, trying desperately to put on a brave face after doing something so exposing.

Kate sniffled. "Oh, honey, no," She soothed. "That was beautiful. Lapushka (sweetheart), you have a gift. Don't hide it away."

Cassie managed a humble smile. "I've never really been big on sharing my songs. I mostly just write them as my own form of therapy. I'd much rather play somebody else's music if other people are going to hear it," Cassie admitted.

"I'm gonna say it, Cass. I think you're crazy. That was beautiful. You're depriving the world of something amazing."

"I had a few meetings with a producer when I was in England," Cassie admitted. "But when it became obvious that I was going to be promoting myself wearing lingerie and holding my guitar like a phallic object, I knew it wasn't for me. The music industry is just so insidious, and I wasn't going to go giving up parts of myself so that I could fit into somebody else's view of what was going to sell records."

Kate raised an eyebrow. "Were you ever a kid?" She asked. Cassie scoffed. "No, seriously. It's like you went from infant to adult. I hate that you're still a baby and you're more together than I'll ever be," Kate complained.

"Oh, I wouldn't say I'm more together than you. You've had a steady job for how long now? I have no idea what I want to do with my life, so I float, because the idea of getting trapped in something that I don't want to do makes me want to break out in hives," Cassie revealed with a grin. "And now that I'm done being maudlin, get your guitar," She ordered. Kate grinned, and moved to pick up her guitar from where it was stashed. She quickly checked that it was tuned. She began jamming. Cassie listened for a moment, and quickly began to jam along with her sister.

"What's Castle done now?" Cassie asked. Kate's jaw dropped open. "Oh come on, Kate. I am the one person on this planet you cannot lie to, and you have your Castle-is-being-an-ass face on. What did he do?" Cassie demanded.

Kate sighed. "He's shadowing another detective."

"What, like Ryan or Espo? C'mon Katya, you can't be that possessive."

"He's tailing Ethan Slaughter. AKA The Widow Maker," Kate breathed. "This guy…. Cass, he's such an asshole. He goes through partners quicker than you go through countries. And if I have to call Alexis and Martha and tell them that they need to go make an ID because Castle suddenly thinks he's Dirty Harry, I will resurrect his ass so that I can kick it back to a time long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away," Kate growled. She took a deep breath, and got a hold of herself. "Besides, I'm sick of looking at Ryan walking around like a kicked puppy. The guy is embarrassing himself."

"I'm sure that is exactly what the problem is, here. Ryan and Esposito must be _so_ distraught. It would have nothing to do with the fact that he's cheating on you with this Slaughter guy," Cassie hedged.

"He's not cheating on me." Kate argued.

"Oh my God, Katie. Stop defending him. Castle is being an asshole. You're allowed to be mad at him for it." Cassie encouraged. "Just try it out. I sang for you," She challenged.

Kate stood up, and began to pace the room. "Alright…Okay…He is. He is _cheating_ on our partnership. God, he is being such a jerk. I know he's mad at me, but I wish he'd man up and sever whatever it is we have going on," Kate ranted. "He is taking the coward's way out, and that is pissing me off more than I can express."

"Good work, Kate. Keep going. Lay it all out," Cassie encouraged.

"Yesli on ne khochet bytʹ moim partnerom bolʹshe, eto fine. I by on prosto chelovek i tak skazatʹ. YA ne mogu prinyatʹ yego podergivaniya vokrug menya gorazdo bolʹshe vremeni. YA khochu, chtoby on perestal bytʹ takoĭ mudak!" (If he doesn't want to be my partner anymore, that's fine. I wish he'd just man up and say so. I can't take him jerking me around much longer. I wish he'd stop being such an asshole!) Kate paced the room, muttering to herself in Russian. She flopped down on the couch with a groan.

"He's dead to me. Feel better?" Cassie asked. Kate shrugged.

"Mostly, I just feel like I need to hit something. I'm going to the gym."

* * *

Cassie awoke with a jolt. Years of living in backpackers hostels and one too many encounters with people accidentally walking into her room after one too many of the local beverage, or a few choice members of the male species wandering into her room thinking they could have a little bit of fun with a sleeping American girl (because hey, all American girls are easy, right?) had Cassie acclimatised to grabbing the closest thing she could to defend herself. An empty bottle of water wasn't particularly menacing, but it was all that she could manage under the circumstances (and the switchblade that had accompanied her from Sicily onward had been confiscated at Customs when she'd flown to Australia).

"Katie?" Cassie asked blearily. She sat up, and flicked on her bedside lamp. "What's going on?"

Kate bit her lip and deliberated. "It's… It's nothing. Sorry I woke you up." She apologised hastily, before stepping out of Cassie's doorframe.

"Oh hell no. You do not interrupt a REM cycle and then tell me it's nothing. Get your ass in here and start explaining before I feel the need to choke you." Kate deliberated, before climbing into the other half of Cassie's bed.

"Out with it," Cassie demanded. Kate retaliated by pressing cold toes into Cassie's leg. Cassie squealed. "C'mon Kate. What's got you so shaken up?" Cassie asked, more gently this time.

"I had a dream," Kate admitted. "I was back at Roy's funeral. But this time, the sniper didn't hit me. He hit you. And then instead of getting you to hospital, you were thrown into a freezer. A freezer with a tiger in it. Then I was at the morgue. I was showing Alexis and Martha Castle's body after he'd gone rogue with Slaughter," Kate paused, willing her racing heartbeat to subside. "I haven't had a dream like this in months. Therapy has been great. It's really been helping, and then I had this dream," Cassie reached out blindly, and grabbed Kate's hand, grasping it tightly.

"They used to be so much worse than they are now. Poor Dad bore the brunt of it. He used to have to wake me up when I was screaming, holding me down so I couldn't tear stitches when I thrashed," Kate's free hand snuck up to press on her sternum. "It was so bad at one stage that he ended up sharing a bed with me," Kate admitted. Cassie let her face remain compassionate. Now wasn't the time for her feelings about their father. She might maintain that he was a drug-addicted asshole, but she'd always be grateful that he was there for Kate when she wasn't.

"That was my biggest struggle when I came back here. I was so grateful to have my own space; but it meant that there was nobody around when I woke up."

Cassie scooted closer to her sister in the bed, so they shared a pillow. She began to gently run a hand through Kate's sleep tousled hair. "You don't have to be alone anymore, Katie," She whispered.

Kate nodded, her eyes slipping shut, her breathing becoming more measured. "I'm not alone anymore," She mumbled, sleep heavy on her words, still maintaining her tight grip on Cassie's hand.

It was a long time before Cassie slipped back into slumber that night.

* * *

It was a relief to be behind a bar again. Cassie was so glad to be back at work, even thought she knew that Annie had deliberately given her a week's worth of mid shifts so that she couldn't work herself to the bone again. She was good at being behind a bar. She understood which spirits could blend with mixers to create a taste of heaven. She could laugh, joke, and maybe even flirt a bit, and all it did was pad her tip jar a little more. She winked as she pushed several pints of beer at a patron, giggling when he moaned that he would "never hear the end of it" when she'd put different sized straws in the beers so he could recognise the difference between them when he got back to the table.

"Glad to be back?" Valentina, one of the other bartenders asked her.

Cassie nodded. "Val, you have no idea. I reorganised my closet, twice," She griped. Valentina laughed before going to serve two women who looked like they'd just finished a hard day's work in an office building. Cassie absentmindedly wiped down the bar before noticing the presence of people at the counter.

"Oh, hey Castle. How ya doing?" Cassie greeted, determined to at least play nice when she was at work, rather than bludgeoning him to death with a bottle of Jim Beam the way she wanted to. She picked up a bottle of Castle's preferred Scotch and began flipping the bottle around, flair bartending in the way she'd learnt working in a burlesque bar in Moscow. She noticed who was accompanying Castle. "Who's your friend?" She asked innocently, although she was relatively certain she knew who the lumbering mass of man muscle was.

"Detective Ethan Slaughter." Cassie resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the sleazy glance up and down her body that came along with Slaughter's introduction. She could practically see him undressing her with his eyes.

"Two of my usual," Castle ordered. Cassie nodded, picking up two seven-ounce glasses. She juggled them one handed for a few seconds as she continued to flick the bottle of Scotch around, before putting the glasses down on the bar, pouring two generous free pour servings (a trick she'd learned while working at O'Sullivans Irish Pub in Montmatre).

"I hope you know that the same rules are going to apply to you as they do to everyone else tonight," Cassie told Castle conversationally.

"What rules?" Slaughter rumbled, taking his time to check out Valentina's ass as she bent over to grab a pair of Coronas from the bar refrigerators.

"You get rowdy, you're out. You look like you're going to puke, you're out. You get handsy with the patrons or the bar staff, you're out. Basically, you piss me off, I kick your ass out of this fine establishment. Remember, Castle? It was, after all, your idea." Cassie said sweetly. She noticed a group of younger looking guys contemplating the beer selection further down the bar. "Excuse me." She added, grateful for the excuse to get away.

"Ah, come on. Do you really only have this American piss on tap?" One of the guys complained, his brogue thick and soothing.

"Excuse me, what the fuck are you doing in my place of employment?" Cassie demanded. She shot a wide grin at the guys that she'd fronted a band for back in Australia.

"C'mon Cass, you raved about this place the other day. We had to come check it out," Daz, the guitarist, and now lead singer of the band pointed out.

"We haven't found a place that has decent beer yet. Help," Shorty; the ironically tall drummer, whined.

"You're so full of crap, asshole. The place I took you last week had Pure Blonde on tap. You were happier than a pig in shit, and don't even try and deny it," Cassie shot back.

"Oh Cassie, you always were so polite when you were behind the bar. Please, oh fair barmaid, quench our thirst with but a pint of amber fluid," Tommo, the bassist (and the one guy always good to save your ass when getting hit on after a gig) complained. Cassie rolled her eyes and pulled three pint glasses from the refrigerator. She expertly flipped a tap on, and poured three beers without having to turn the tap off between filling each glass.

"Mahou Clasica. Probably the best Spanish beer I ever had. Now pay up, bitches," The boys all grumbled, but handed over the cash.

"Now, tell me the real reason you're here," Cassie ordered. The boys exchanged looks.

"You guys are starting a regular live music night. We got in contact with Annie, the bird that runs this joint, and would you look at that, we're the first act playing," Daz explained.

Cassie's jaw dropped. "Shut the fuck up!" She gasped. She lined up four shot glasses, and grabbed the vodka and peach schnapps, twisting the bottles in the air before pouring the shots.

"Bloody hell, Cass, you're not making us lady drinks, are you?" Shorty whined.

Cassie eyeballed him. "These lady drinks are on the house. You can either shut your mouth and enjoy the only Wet Pussy you're going to get tonight, or you can keep being a sooky la la and I'll have more than one Wet Pussy," Cassie winked, well aware of the innuendo she was playing with regarding the name of the shot (especially after her first Friday night bartending in Sydney when she'd punched a guy at the bar for asking if he could get a shot by such a controversial name).

"Top sheila award," Tommo declared, picking up a shot glass. She gave him a wink. The other boys picked up their glasses.

"Cheers, big ears," Daz intoned seriously. Cassie nodded, before tossing back the shot.

Cassie shot the guys a blinding grin. "Break a leg tonight, guys. I'll be the one dancing behind the bar."

"Aw, c'mon Cass. You've gotta jump up for one song with us."

"Guys, I'm _working._ I can't just run away from the bar whenever I want," Cassie hissed.

"You can, and you will," Annie interjected. "Hey guys, I'm Annie. It's nice to actually meet you in person," She greeted the boys, sticking her hand our to shake their hands.

"Sorry, Cass. I lied. Annie, you get the top Sheila award," Tommo told her seriously. Annie shot Cassie a quizzical look.

"It means that they like you. You're the best girl," Cassie interpreted. She shot the boys a look. "Since when do you actually talk like that? I have very clear memories of you boys telling me that most Australians don't actually speak like the Crocodile Hunter," Cassie raised an eyebrow. She could totally see through their little act; the boys thought they'd have more chance of pulling American tail if they spoke like stereotypical Aussie blokes.

"Oh, look, I think you have a customer," Shorty said quickly, gesturing to where Slaughter was standing.

Cassie rolled her eyes at him. "You know what, Shorty? That is a dollar in the douchebag jar," She pointed to her tip jar, before scooting down the bar to serve Slaughter.

"You look familiar." Slaughter told Cassie as she poured him two more Scotches (totally short changing him alcohol, but because she didn't use anything to measure, how was he to know that?). Cassie resisted the urge to shudder; she could tell Slaughter was totally trying to guess what colour panties she had on.

"My sister works at the precinct." Cassie informed him shortly, pushing the glasses toward him.

"I'll take two beers as well. Is your sister as hot as you?" Slaughter asked.

Cassie resisted the urge to throw the beer she was pouring in his face. "My sister is Detective Kate Beckett, so you tell me."

"I wouldn't throw her outta bed the next morning." Slaughter mused. "Does that make you Nikki Heat junior, then?"

"Actually, I think that just makes me Cassie." She was rapidly losing patience with this jerk, but she couldn't throw his ass out just yet, because she could tell he wasn't actually drunk; he was just a chauvinistic douche by nature. "It's on the house." She told him, malice floating just underneath her words. She hoped he would take the hint and leave. She shot him a totally fake grin as he leered at her and left the bar.

"He's a skeeve." Valentina declared.

"Yep." Cassie agreed. "But, he's a skeeve who is drinking with the boss, so I think we'll just have to put up with him for now."

* * *

These were the kind of nights that Cassie enjoyed working. It was busy enough that she didn't have to look at the time, her tip jar was overflowing, the live music was pumping, and she could dance as she worked. The only possible downside was that she had to let her boss and his new best friend slowly get paralytically wasted, and the more they drank, the more disgusting they became.

"I think Nikki Heat should have a hot little sister." Slaughter pondered, chatting with Castle as Cassie poured two more Scotches.

"You know, the kind that lives in some sort of commune, and somebody gets killed in an orgy, and Nikki has to solve it. An orgy scene would be fun to write, wouldn't it?" Slaughter leered as he stood, clinging to the bar.

Cassie grit her teeth. "At no point in my life have I lived in a commune, and I've certainly never been in an orgy. So try again." She shot Castle a glare, wondering if he was going to put a muzzle on Slaughter, but he just shrugged and avoided eye contact.

"Oh come on, a girl like you can't pretend she hasn't had some serious sexcapades."

"Given that you have had nearly half a bottle of Scotch, I'm going to let that one slide." Cassie told him primly. "And FYI? My sexcapades, as you so charmingly put it, are none of your damn business. It'll shock you realise that real life isn't a cheap porno, and I'm not actually gagging to fuck anything that moves. So put your tongue back into your mouth, and save it for your spank bank," Cassie snapped. She shoved the glasses into Slaughter's hands and gestured for him to leave the busy bar.

"Mr. Castle!" Cassie called out to Castle's retreating figure. She waited for him to return to the bar. "I'm getting really damn sick of this game. Why don't you stop pretending that this party hard lifestyle is what you're about. We both know you'd rather be at home, playing laser tag with Alexis," Cassie snapped at him. "You know, your daughter?"

"I think you should stop pretending like you know me at all. I think I'll take that bottle of Scotch back to my table," Castle said icily.

"I'm so sorry, Sir. That would go against the recent changes in bar policy. The ones you instigated, if you'll remember," Cassie reminded him, quasi politeness ringing through her tone.

* * *

"Hey, Cass, we'll just leave your till running for the night, so don't worry about cashing it up. I'll leave your share of the tips in the safe." Annie told her. Cassie nodded. She didn't even fight to work late. She ran out to the office, and quickly clocked off, before dashing to the bathroom to change out of her booze splashed clothing. She shook her unicorn hair out, before moving back out into the bar, slipping through the crowd as the boys played.

"Now, look guys, we have a bit of a story to tell you," Daz told the crowd as the band came on for their encore. "I'm sure all the locals know Cass, the world travelling barmaid extraordinaire. She's a top chick," the crowd interrupted to cheer, "but something that you may not know is that when she was living in Australia, she used to front this band," The crowd went nuts when they heard this. "So, I think that it would only be right if we brought Miss Cassie Beckett up on the stage to perform our last song of the night," Daz announced. Cassie shook her head rapidly. She might have been ok with it earlier in the evening, but now that she could feel the leering glare of Slaughter on her back, she really didn't want to do it.

"I think she might be a little bit shy. Help us get her on stage guys!" Tommo lead the crowd in a chant of "Cassie, Cassie, Cassie," before Cassie finally relented and allowed herself to be pulled onto the tiny stage. She locked eyes with Castle across the pub, before turning to face the guys and whisper a song to them. She grinned as she heard Daz start to play the intro.

_Keep you in the dark__  
__You know they all pretend__  
__Keep you in the dark__  
__And so it all began_

Cassie began to headbang along with the drum beat, a smile cracking onto her face as she saw the crowd start to go crazy.

_Send in your skeletons__  
__Sing as their bones go marching in again__  
__The need you buried deep__  
__The secrets that you keep are ever ready__  
__Are you ready?_

_I'm finished making sense__  
__Done pleading ignorance__  
__That whole defence_

_Spinning infinity, boy__  
__The wheel is spinning me__  
__It's never-ending, never-ending__  
__Same old story__  
_

Cassie wrenched the microphone from its stand as she began to rock out on the chorus

_What if I say I'm not like the others?__  
__What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays?__  
__You're the pretender__  
__What if I say I will never surrender?__  
__What if I say I'm not like the others?__  
__What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays?__  
__You're the pretender__  
__What if I say that I'll never surrender?__  
_

Even across the room, she could feel Castle's dark gaze on her. She really didn't care. She hoped he could see the bullshit he was peddling.

_In time our soul untold__  
__I'm just another soul for sale oh well__  
__The page is out of print__  
__We are not permanent__  
__We're temporary, temporary__  
__Same old story_

"C'mon, help me out!" Cassie called out to the audience, holding out her mike as she got the crowd to sing along with the chorus.

_What if I say I'm not like the others?__  
__What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays?__  
__You're the pretender__  
__What if I say that I'll never surrender?__  
__What if I say I'm not like the others?__  
__What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays?__  
__You're the pretender__  
__What if I say that I'll never surrender?__  
_

Cassie had a little bit of fun with the bridge, turning to eyeball Daz as she sang.

_I'm the voice inside your head__  
__You refuse to hear__  
__I'm the face that you have to face__  
__Mirrored in your stare__  
__I'm what's left, I'm what's right__  
__I'm the enemy__  
__I'm the hand that will take you down__  
__Bring you to your knees__  
_

Daz played on Cassie's actions, coming up close to her, joining into the staring contest the best he could while still playing the guitar.

_So who are you?__  
__Yeah, who are you?__  
__Yeah, who are you?__  
__Yeah, who are you?_

_Keep you in the dark__  
__You know they all pretend_

_What if I say I'm not like the others?__  
__What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays?__  
__You're the pretender__  
__What if I say I will never surrender?__  
__What if I say I'm not like the others?__  
__What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays?__  
__You're the pretender__  
__What if I say that I'll never surrender?_

Cassie stuck the mike back on the stand, moving slightly to share it with Daz as he harmonised the end of the song with her.

_What if I say I'm not like the others?__  
__(Keep you in the dark)__  
__What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays?__  
__(You know they all pretend)__  
__You're the pretender__  
__(Who dares)__  
__What if I say I will never surrender?__What if I say I'm not like the others?__  
__(Keep you in the dark)__  
__What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays?__  
__(You know they all pretend)__  
__You're the pretender__  
__(Who dares)__  
__What if I say I will never surrender?__So who are you?__  
__Yeah, who are you?__  
__Yeah, who are you?_

Cassie took a bow with the boys, grinning widely as she watched the bar get flooded with patrons. It was definitely a good night to be at work.

* * *

Cassie sat at one of the tables with the boys, enjoying a beer after their very successful show.

"Congrats, guys. You did a great job. Clearly you managed to survive without me." Cassie teased. Shorty gave her a filthy look, before lighting up a cigarette.

"You're getting it now, you bloody Yank." He growled, before gesturing at the boys. Cassie knew exactly what was coming next. She flicked her hair off her shoulders and picked up her beer glass.

"_Heeeeeere's to Cassie, she's true blue,_

_She's a pisspot through and through, _

_She's a bastard, so they say, _

_She tried to go to heaven but she went the other way!_

_She went down, down, down, down…"_

Cassie drank her beer as fast as she could upon the boys starting to chant "down." When she slammed her beer glass down on the table, the boys broke into cheers.

"I knew you hadn't lost your charm," Tommo crowed, planting an affectionate kiss on her cheek. Cassie shrugged. She honestly hadn't realised that Tommo was still carrying his torch for her, and she really didn't have it in her to break the guy's heart.

"Oh come on guys. I drank my way across two continents. Don't think for a second my drinking prowess disappeared because I came home," Cassie griped, before plucking the cigarette from Shorty's hand, and indulging her one truly terrible drinking habit... the social cigarette. She handed the cigarette back after a drag.

"I'm going back to the bar. Same again?" She asked. They all nodded. Cassie sauntered up to the bar.

"Having a good night?" Slaughter drawled in her ear.

Cassie shuddered. "I know you have."

"I'm a simple kind of guy. Good booze, good-looking women. I'm easily pleased," He trailed his fingers across her bare shoulder. It was time for drastic action.

Cassie turned to him, all doe eyes and coy expression. "I've noticed you watching me," She breathed, moving close to toy with the hair at the back of his neck. "You've spent this entire night thinking about my vagina," She continued, the same Marilyn Monroe voice floating from her lips. "You've been thinking about what it would be like to drag me out into the back alley, and fuck me against a wall," Cassie told him.

"You've spent this entire evening thinking about slamming me against the bricks between the dumpsters and the staff exit, and having your wicked way with me until I can't help but scream," Cassie wove the story elegantly, watching Slaughter's eyes light up. "Guess what…" she leaned closer, her lips at his ear. "It is _never_ going to happen," She growled. With that, her knee popped up, and slammed not into his groin, like one would expect, but instead into his bellyful of liquor. "Hey, Lou!" Cassie called out, gesturing to the security guard who had been watching the entire interaction with a discreetly hidden but none the less amused expression. "It seems Detective Slaughter has reached his limit for the evening. Perhaps you should get he and Mr Castle into a cab." She fluttered her eyelashes at Slaughter innocently as Lou escorted him and Castle out of the pub.

* * *

**If you're ever in Australia... make sure you experience the joy that is the Pisspot Drinking Song. Put that phrase into Youtube, and you should find a link to it. Like climbing the Harbour Bridge, or eating Vegemite, it's a cultural experience you can't live without. True story... Some friends and I sang it to an American kid in a pub in France... It was messy. **

**Please review :D**


	9. Chapter 9

**I'm so sorry about the delay, guys. RL and chapter 10 are both kicking my arse :(**

**For those who asked, the two songs in the last chapter were Misguided Ghosts by Paramore (the song I was listening to when Cassie was first conceived) and The Pretender, by the Foo Fighters. For those playing at home, the Firefly nod was the name of Cassie's guitar. Jayne's (Adam Baldwin's character) favourite gun was named Vera, and I thought I'd slip it in (not to be confused with the Noir episode)**

**In other news, the one shot celebrating 50 reviews is up. It's called Paper Roses and Gumbo, its shameless fluff, so check it out if you want to. Otherwise, I think I've reached 100 reviews, so I'll do the same thing: pick a review of chapter 9 at random and write a one shot based on that reviewer's prompt :D**

**As usual, thanks to Tad. **

**Disclaimer: All I own is Cassie. But I'd probably sell her to AM and co.**

**Also- if you read and enjoyed 50 Shades of Grey... I apologise in advance for this chapter :)**

* * *

Any bartender worth their salt knows that the mid afternoon slump is the time you spend gearing up for a big night ahead. Cassie stood at the bar, quartering limes as Steve, the guy who'd opened that day, meandered around, polishing wine glasses and restocking pints. Cassie dumped the pile of limes she'd been slicing into the trays that sat along the bar, before covering them in plastic wrap. She ducked out the back to the washroom, where she grabbed several large containers. Upon returning to the main part of the bar, she quickly served a regular patron a drink, before falling back to the rhythm of lime cutting, filling up the containers so that the bar would stay stocked with garnishes throughout the night. Cassie noticed another patron, and looked up to see Castle sitting in front of her at the bar. Wordlessly, she grabbed his favourite Scotch.

"Actually, I'm steering clear of that stuff for a while," Castle interrupted her pouring. Cassie gave him a dark look and grabbed a new glass. In seconds, she dumped a Shirley Temple in front of him, complete with an umbrella.

"Now, how did you know that these are my favourite?" Castle asked jokingly. Cassie's glare only intensified, and she gripped her paring knife more tightly.

"I was an asshole, last night, wasn't I?"

Cassie kept her head down, the only indication that she had heard him was the violent way she cleared her board, and the small scoff she gave. "No shit, dickhead," She muttered under her breath.

"Cassie, I'm sorry. I should have told Slaughter where to stick it. He has no right to talk to my staff the way he spoke to you," Castle apologised earnestly.

"You think I'm mad about that?" Cassie spluttered, all pretence of the silent treatment shattered. She shoved the lid on the container full of limes violently, before forcing it in the bottom of the bar fridge. She opened a punnet of strawberries, beginning to hull and put a slit in the berry for cocktails with more force than was strictly necessary. "Do you think he's the first guy to see long legs, tattoos, a piercing or two and technicolour hair and assume that I'm easy? I travelled alone for five years, Castle. I think I understand the way the male mind works. He's not the first guy to hit on me, and he won't be the last."

"I don't understand…"

"I'm mad because you're hurting my sister!" Cassie admitted, her voice far squeakier than she intended. "Kate trusts you. I think she trusts you more than she trusts me, and you're throwing that in her face," Cassie whisper yelled. "She's been doing so damn well, but now she's having flare ups, and the only change in her life is that you've started acting like she doesn't matter," Cassie's filthy look was more than a little accusatory. "I won't pretend that I know every in and out of your relationship," Cassie gave him a significant look; the murder board saved on Castle's laptop flashing through her mind. "But I do know that she asked you to wait," Cassie raised the hand holding the knife to ward off Castle's protests. "I know that was a huge ask. Believe me, I get that. But you've gotta ask yourself; are you a chicken, or are you a pig?"

"Those are my choices, a chicken or a pig?" Castle echoed.

Cassie nodded. "The chicken might be involved, but the pig is committed. She asked you to wait, and so far you have. So ask yourself, are you a chicken, or are you a pig? That wall isn't going to be there forever." She locked eyes with Castle, daring him to argue.

Castle broke eye contact after several seconds, moving to sip at his Shirley Temple. "Last night wasn't exactly the best way to broach the topic, but I have been thinking about writing a character into the next Nikki Heat book based on you."

Cassie raised an eyebrow, "Is that so?"

"But I don't think she'll be Nikki's little sister. I'm thinking more along the lines of protégé," Castle revealed. Cassie put the strawberries into the refrigerator with far more grace than the limes. She quickly served a patron, and then stepped back to Castle, gesturing for him to continue as she began slicing lemon wheels.

"I'm thinking young, brilliant. Her father was in the military, or perhaps international relations, so she lived all over the world. She worked for Interpol, before deciding to come back to the motherland and is made a detective at the NYPD. Detective Alexandra Snow. Or Rayne. I haven't decided yet," Castle painted the picture vividly.

Cassie pondered his words. "Call the book _Wet Heat_, and I will make sure you sleep with the fishes," Cassie gave him a mock fierce glare. "I met Mafiosi in Sicilia, don't think I didn't learn a thing or two."

Castle drained his glass, before tucking it behind the bar. "Like I said, Cassie, I'm truly sorry for the way I allowed Slaughter to act in here last night. But I best be off," He stood, and shrugged on his brown leather coat on.

Cassie's curiosity won the better of her. "What are your plans for the evening? Hitting the hard stuff with Sheen?"

"Laser tag. With Alexis."

* * *

Cassie looked up at the door as it swung open. Kate shot her a tired smile trudged into the house, carrying bags of spicy smelling Thai food.

"Thank God you're home!" Cassie cried out. She flung her hand out, holding out a book. "Take it away from me!" She begged.

"What is it?" Kate asked.

Cassie shuddered, "That Mommy porn Madison lent you. It has got to be the worst thing I've ever read, but I _cannot_ put it down."

Kate looked up from where she was dishing out servings of shrimp Pad Thai. "That makes no sense, Cass."

"Kate, you do not understand! This book is complete and utter crap. The male character is an abusive prick, and the female protagonist is so weak minded and servile that she just allows herself to be treated like shit," Cassie complained. "And it has some of the WORST descriptions of sex I've ever read."

Cassie cleared her throat. "I'll just give you a few of my favourites…" She thumbed through the book. _"__And then his girth was in my hand and I was like "Oh my…holy crap" and then he stuck his stick into my canal like a train full of cabaret dancing sperm and my vagina was Broadway."_ Cassie swooned back on the couch dramatically.

"Ay, dios mio." Kate muttered.

"Oh, no, no, no, it gets better," Cassie warned her, flicking to another page. _"__His pointer finger circled my puckered love cave._ _"Are you ready for this?" he mewled, smirking at me like a mother hamster about to eat her three-legged young,"_ Cassie read out in the same melodramatic tone. "What the actual fuck? As a proud owner of a vagina, I'm incredibly offended by that description!" Cassie ranted. Kate burst out laughing.

"Don't you laugh at me, Ekaterina Beckett. I'm making a new rule. If you can't call it by its proper name, you are not allowed to write about it!" Cassie decided.

Kate fought to restrain her giggles. "And this is published literature?" She confirmed.

"Well, apparently. I haven't read you my favourite yet," Cassie held the book up, sliding her glasses down the bridge of her nose, looking every inch the hard eyed librarian. _"__I eye Christian's toothbrush. It would be like having him in my mouth. Hmm… Glancing guiltily over my shoulder at the door, I feel the bristles on the toothbrush. They are damp. He must have used it already. Grabbing it quickly, I squirt toothpaste on it and brush my teeth in double quick time. I feel so naughty. It's such a thrill_… Oh Ana, you bad, bad girl!" Cassie mocked. She threw the book towards Kate, and picked up her bowl.

Kate squealed in disgust, "She used his _toothbrush?_ Oh my god! Gross!"

"I'm full of icky feelings right now, Katie. I never want to have sex again," Cassie whined, kicking her feet around, as if she could shake off the heebie jeebies. "Make it go away!"

"Oh, Maddy, I'm judging you so harshly right now. I can't read that," Kate muttered.

"Don't do it to yourself. Don't suffer as I've suffered," Cassie warned Kate wisely.

"Just hold onto the good times, Cass. Don't let one erotic novel destroy what is a beautiful and natural thing," Kate advised, with just a hint of sarcasm floating on her tone.

"You haven't read it, you can't understand the pain I've gone through," Cassie gasped, doing her best to hold back mock tears.

"Oh relax. Cast your mind back, think of the best sex you ever had, and hold onto that memory."

Cassie drew her legs up onto the crouch and crossed them, balancing her bowl on her knee, leaning her head onto the soft back of the couch. "Jacqueline, the French ballerina, without a doubt," she mused.

Kate choked on her noodles. "Excuse me?"

Cassie twisted her head so that she was looking at Kate, "Oh, come on Katie. You're not going to make me do the awkward coming out thing, are you?" Cassie sighed and put her bowl onto the coffee table.

She took one of Kate's hands. "Katie, I have something to tell you," She began seriously. "I'm bisexual. It's not a phase, I'm not greedy, and it isn't going to go away." Cassie bit her lip and looked for the right words. "I don't have a strict 'type'. I'm attracted to people who can make me laugh, and make me think. I've never understood why I should be constrained by something as trivial as gender." Cassie admitted.

Kate squeezed her little sister's hand tightly. "You brave little bear," She murmured with a gentle smile. She reached up to stroke Cassie's cheek. "I don't care if you love boys, girls, or Martians. You are my sister. I will always love and support you, no matter what," She shot Cassie a blinding grin. "No matter what. Do you hear me?" She stood and grabbed Cassie in a fierce embrace.

Cassie squeezed her back tightly. "Thank you."

Kate released her from the embrace and sat back down on the couch. "So… a French ballerina?" She inquired with a flick of her eyebrows.

Cassie swallowed her mouthful, "Oh my God, the chick was legitimately crazycakes, but damn, she could do this thing…" She trailed off, "I don't think you want those details, but you should know it was very _Black Swan,_" Cassie finished delicately.

Kate sighed when her phone went off. "Beckett," she answered, voice completely professional. She listened for a few moments, nodding along with the conversation, before hanging up. "Cass, I am so sorry to do this to you now, but a new lead has come up. I've got to call Castle and go check it out."

"I'm sorry, did I just hear you say you had to call Castle? Didn't we agree he was dead to us?" Cassie asked.

"I never agreed to that. And I don't know what happened, but he's different. It's like he's back to the old him. Before all the shootings, and conspiracies and the drama," Kate revealed. She sighed. "He says it's his last case."

"And he's never said that before? The guy is like a fly to honey. He can't help himself."

"I really have to go. I'll talk to you later, Cass," Kate said regretfully, pulling on her leather jacket and heading for the door, flipping through her contacts.

"Kate," Cassie called out. Kate turned around. "If you get the chance, you have to tell him. Don't leave him hanging. He's reacting like this because he loves you. He _loves _you, Katie. Don't throw that away."

* * *

Cassie perched herself on Kate's desk, content to observe. Even well after 10pm, the place was alive. She barely contained a giggle when she saw uniforms dragging zombies in for questioning. The interaction between her sister and Castle drew her attention. Kate was certainly correct in her assessment over dinner; there was a clear difference in the interaction between the two of them. It was like the angst had been hidden away, and they were back to the hard nosed cop who had her feet firmly on the ground, and the chronically immature writer who took pleasure in doing her head in.

Kate battered Cassie's feet off her chair. Cassie reluctantly obeyed.

"Cassie, if you were a mythological creature, what would you be?" Castle asked.

Cassie shrugged, taking a sip of her hot chocolate. "A maenad."

"Servant of Dionysius, the god of wine and theatre. Literally, the raving ones- often portrayed as being in a state of drunken ecstasy, mostly through public drunkenness and dancing. They were known for inciting rebellion, unrestrained sexual behaviour and when in this state, had superhuman strength, which they used to dismember humans and animals," Castle recited.

Cassie tipped her cup to him. "Just the fun stuff. Well played, good sir," Cassie took the lid off her cup, pausing to dip a cookie into it, and then looked back at Castle. "How do you even know that? And please, don't tell me you researched it for a book."

"Nah, just a mythology nerd," Castle confessed.

Cassie turned to Kate. "Excuse me, I would like to know why I was not informed about the zombies? I had to find out through Castle's Twitter feed. Be aware that I am deeply hurt by this experience."

"You are not, Castle shouldn't be tweeting about current investigations, which he knows, and there _are_ no zombies," Kate answered through gritted teeth; opening up Google to do some research.

"The hoards of decaying monsters traipsing through the bullpen would suggest otherwise," Cassie countered with a grin. She looked over at Castle, who was biting his fist to stop himself from laughing. Kate was way too easy to mess with.

"Oh come on, Katie. Open your mind. I went vampire hunting when I lived in Transylvania,"

"You can go vampire hunting?" Castle echoed, his eyes almost bugging out of his head, he pulled out his phone and began Googling.

"Hells yes you can. Greatest fun of my life, but camping out in the Carpathians? Not the smartest idea I've ever had. I nearly got eaten by a wolf," Cassie recalled.

"I beg your pardon?" Kate's head popped up when she heard that.

"That was mostly my fault. We'd been celebrating our victories over the undead creatures of the night with local spirits of several varieties, when nature called. I toddled out to a tree, and I swear I saw a wolf eyeing off my bare ass. Scared the ever loving crap out of me," Cassie explained. She looked over to where Captain Gates was observing the bullpen from her office with an expression of dismay at the circus her precinct was becoming. Cassie raised her cup and shot the Captain a wink. "You know, she is _lovely," _Cassie observed.

"Gates? Lovely?" Kate asked; eyes trained to the monitor, trying to learn as much as she could from Wikipedia's explanation of zombie walks. She stood and stretched. "See kids, read it and weep. They're not zombies, they're just brain dead. Castle, get moving," Kate ordered, picking up a file and moving towards an interrogation room.

* * *

"Urgh, I hate this," Kate complained. She flipped over the file. "The bastard's right. We can't get him on _anything._ This is pretty close to being the perfect murder." She looked over and saw Cassie saunter into the bullpen, container of cupcakes in hand.

"Food for the troops?" Cassie asked sweetly, perching herself on the edge of Kate's desk. She grinned when she saw how quickly both Ryan and Esposito jumped up and moved across the room.

"For real? Zombie cupcakes?" Esposito asked.

"I am nothing if not a sucker for a theme," Cassie replied. She smirked when Ryan bit into his, totally unprepared for the red jelly filling that squirted out of the middle.

"Guys, can we focus, please? Murderer about to go free here," Kate snapped, eyeing the murder board, willing a detail to jump out at her.

"What exactly is the problem here?" Cassie asked, scraping the icing off the top of her cupcake and licking her finger. "You know the guy did it, so just arrest him."

"The problem is that we have a significant lack of proof. This case is crazy enough as it is, we need something solid for it to stand up in court," Kate answered gruffly.

"So, the guy just won't admit he did it, right?" Cassie confirmed.

"Right," Ryan answered, using a napkin to dab at his tie.

"So can't we just _make _him admit it? You know, force his hand?" Cassie asked, as if the answer was the most obvious thing in the world. She groaned when nobody reacted. She stood up and stepped towards the murder board. "The guy who is going down for this, how tall is he?" She asked, sizing up the boys. She looked at the photo again. "Nope. You guys are no good," she muttered. She looked over at her sister. "Kate, I'm going to need a costume make up palette and Castle."

* * *

Cassie surveyed her team. She bounced a dry erase marker on her palm, and she was shamelessly playing dramatic music in her head for the moment. "Are we clear on the plan?" She asked. "Kate, you are going to go through the process of releasing this dirtbag, just like you would anybody else. Javi, you're the muscle. You escort the guy to the basement parking at his building. Keep him in the car as long as you can, where Castle and Ryan will be waiting, ready to attack. Kate will be there too, with uniforms on hand if things get messy. Clearly, Ryan, be on the look out for the right car. We don't want to go terrorising innocent New Yorkers," Cassie articulated the plan, channelling every single movie general and police leader she could think of. "And for God's sake, Castle. Keep picking at that makeup and I'll smack you."

Kate shot Cassie a half smile, radiating pride. "I think Cassie said it all. Let's do this, team."

* * *

Cassie couldn't help herself. She was a shameless voyeur. She could see the tender conversation happening between Castle and Kate. She hoped that it was them at least trying to reconcile. Cassie reminded herself that it was technically none of her business, and that she could probably force it out of Kate later. She took a furtive look around the break room, before sneaking into her handbag. She added a healthy dollop from her flask to the five mugs, before slipping it back into her bag and turning her attention to the jug of milk and the steam wand.

She waited until Kate had sat down at her desk, Castle perched next to her. She dumped mugs on the desks of Ryan and Esposito, before heading to Kate's desk. "Boosting my good ju-ju for the day, guys," she said lightly, placing mugs next to both Castle and Kate.

Kate smiled and took a sip. "Jesus, Cassie. What did you spike this with? Pure ethanol?" She spluttered.

"I'm offended you're not accepting the ju-ju. And keep your voice down! Gates likes me, and you can't go ruining that!" Cassie replied.

"How did you do that? I've been working on it for a year, and nothing," Castle enquired.

Cassie shrugged. "I'm just awesome, I guess. And because I'm awesome, I'm going to give you some advice," Cassie gestured for Castle to move closer. "If you want that thousand points playing laser tag? Now is the time to go for it," She advised sagely. She then grinned and held up Castle's wallet. "I'm taking Alexis graduation dress shopping with Martha next week. What credit card are you giving me?"

* * *

**I want to go on a Zombie Walk later this year in Sydney. HEAPS keen :)**

**Also, reviews would be awesome. I'm about to murder chapter 10.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hello my lovely people! I am officially on school holidays, meaning that I have lots more writing time! Now we should all cross our fingers real tight and hope my muse doesn't go on holidays as well :D **

**I got a rather interesting review, and because it was anonymous, I couldn't reply to it privately. Basically, somebody asked why I decided to make Cassie and Kate Russian (feel free to skip ahead to the chapter if you want to guys, this could be very long winded). I knew that I wanted Kate and Cassie to have some sort of heritage that wasn't American- I think culture is a really nice way to bind people together, and I really liked the idea of heritage as a link to their mother; something that could make them feel close to her even though she isn't with them anymore. I also think culture gives a sense of place, and time; which is really interesting for a character like Cassie, who is such a nomad. I also knew that I didn't want to cheat and use Stana's heritage, or one of the languages she speaks.**

**Speaking with my historian hat on, Russian history has always fascinated me, particularly in the Cold War period. In early drafts, I had both Cassie and Kate being big history nerds (Cassie with an ancient history fascination, and Kate being a modern historian), and I thought that the history of the Iron Curtain put an interesting spin on Kate's quest for justice- maybe seeing the injustice that the Russian people suffered under totalitarian rule impacted on her and gave weight to Kate's quests for justice beyond what happened to her mother (she was initially interested in studying injustice from the perspective of what happened in the past). It's an interesting coincidence that Kate's trip to Kiev happened at around the same time that the Russian archives from the Cold War were first opening for historians to access (and in my head, Kate's interest area in history was the Russian history from the Bolshevik uprising). **

**I also really liked that having a culture other than American really added another layer to both Kate and Cassie, and I've really been enjoying learning bits and pieces of Russian culture along the way.**

**As usual, thanks to Tad. You're the awesomest, even if you did go to Lady Gaga without me.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. If I did, I'd buy myself a pair of the shoes Alexis buys in this chapter. **

**Check out my Tumblr for links to shopping purchases and music used in this chapter :)**

* * *

Cassie felt like she was back in tourist mode. She'd actually pulled out a map of New York City; a source of both pride and disgust (pride at her show of dedication to getting Alexis a perfect graduation dress, and disgust that she, a native New Yorker, needed a map). She'd marked out the stores Alexis had already visited in green, before mapping out the must-visit locations of their shopping trip, and the route that would best serve them in terms of maximum shopping time and minimal location changing. Cassie was even rocking flat boots for the occasion.

"Oh for crying out loud, Alexis. Can you please get ready? Sitting here stressing about the fact you have not written your graduation speech isn't going to write it. I'd be far more concerned that you'll be graduating naked," Cassie complained. She shot Martha a grateful grin when a mug of steaming hot coffee and a plate of pastries were placed in front of her. "Lexi, I am not kidding. If you're not dressed in the next thirty seconds, I'll drag you into your bedroom by your pretty red hair and clothe you myself," She threatened through a mouthful of chocolate éclair. Alexis responded with a groan, before packing up her laptop, neatly highlighted copies of famous speeches and their corresponding colour coordinated notes and rushing to her room.

Martha looked up from her survey of Cassie's outline for their shopping trip. "Looks good, kiddo. I say we try Manhattan first, then branch out to Brooklyn if we can't find her anything."

"Works for me. But she has got to stop stressing about this speech. I'm pretty sure our valedictorian was on uppers when he gave his; and everything turned out _totally_ fine."

"Don't suggest that to Alexis. Her blood pressure is high enough as it is. I have no idea where she gets it," Martha warned Cassie with a grin.

Cassie bit into a blueberry turnover. "Martha, I would never dare do such a thing," she answered as primly as she could through a mouthful of food. "But I am about forty five seconds from coming up there and dragging you out kicking and screaming," Cassie called out towards the stairs.

"Cassie, threatening people is incredibly unladylike. I'm ready," Alexis announced sweetly.

Cassie swept up her handbag and slung an arm around Alexis in a move that was half headlock, half hug. "Lex, you're so cute. I have no idea where you got the idea that I'm a lady."

* * *

They'd been to at least eight stores. Shopping for a dress was becoming frustrating: Alexis had a very clear idea of what she didn't want, but couldn't describe what she was looking for.

"I am never going to find anything to wear. My valedictorian's address is going to be a disaster. I'm going to be a naked, speechless mess," Alexis looked absolutely heartbroken, and Cassie wasn't sure if she was supposed to slap her or hug her.

"Babe, it is going to be fine. We haven't left the East Side yet. We have the rest of Manhattan, and all of Brooklyn to go. If it gets really bad, we even have my wardrobe. Please, stop stressing," Cassie implored her.

"C'mon, kiddo. You've been running on empty for days. Don't think I can't hear you clack-clack-clacking on your laptop at all hours of the night," Martha added. "We are going to get some food in your system, and we're going to find you something to wear, I promise," Martha soothed her.

"Alright," Alexis finally relented.

"Fantastic, because I am _starving_," Cassie announced. She linked arms with Alexis, watching Martha take her other arm, and they frog marched Alexis out of the store.

"You ate like, four pastries before we left? How can you possibly be hungry again?" Alexis questioned.

"Kid, I'm always hungry. I've got hollow legs or something."

* * *

Alexis pushed her plate away with a satisfied grin. "Ok, I think I can keep shopping," she decided, beginning to stand.

"Whoa, hold your horses. We need to sit, and discuss styling," Cassie ordered, gesturing for Alexis to sit down. "We've established that your grad gown is dark green with some yellow; so no blues, or reds. You don't want a full-length gown. What else? Is there a style you want to avoid? Are there any cuts that don't look right? Talk to me."

"I don't think I want to wear anything pastel. No browns either,"

"I think we avoid green if we can. You'll look like a tree."

"Can the old lady interject?" Martha butted in. She ignored the raised eyebrows from both girls. "You don't want to look back at this dress and think about how dated it looks. You want to wear something classy. Something that will stand the test of time."

"I say little black dress," Cassie suggested. "And a statement shoe. Oh, how I love a good statement shoe."

Alexis seemed to inflate with the encouragement. "Ok, let's do this then," she agreed.

Martha insisted on paying the bill, waving both girls away with bejewelled hands.

"Where to next?" Alexis asked.

"I haven't actually been to this place, but I've heard amazing things. 11th Street East. Get off the subway at L at First Avenue," Cassie instructed, ignoring Martha's barely suppressed groan at the idea of using the subway.

* * *

Cassie smirked at the sign next to the counter. Her one disastrous experience working in retail made her wholeheartedly agree that unattended children should be given an espresso and a free puppy.

"I've got a good feeling about this place, ladies," Martha announced, her eye immediately caught by a rack of truly fabulous dresses that looked like they belonged to the Golden Age of Hollywood.

Cassie turned to Alexis; hand coming up to squeeze her shoulder. "We've got some good ideas going on. Let's do this," Cassie said encouragingly.

Alexis looked around the store, eyes flashing. "Divide and conquer," She ordered Cassie.

* * *

They finally had it narrowed down to two dresses. Alexis was tossing up between an eggplant halterneck number with a high neckline, and a gorgeous little black dress with a peachy coloured sash.

"I can't decide. I love both of them," Alexis deliberated, holding both dresses up in front of her, studying the mirror critically.

"How's the halterneck going to go under your academic regalia?" Cassie asked. "Don't look so shocked, once upon a time I was an honour roll student," Cassie defended herself against Alexis's surprised look. "Just because I have elected not to go to college, does not mean I am unintelligent. JK Rowling even thinks that I'm a Ravenclaw."

"Oh, good God," Martha muttered, taking a seat in the boyfriend chair that was so kindly provided near the change rooms.

"Pottermore?"

"I got selected for beta testing, got sorted and never went on again," Cassie admitted.

"Me too."

"What house are you?" Cassie asked, eyeing both of the dresses at the same time.

Alexis sighed, "I'm a Hufflepuff. But JK Rowling got sorted into Hufflepuff too!" she defended quickly.

Cassie bit her lip, but didn't laugh. "I didn't say anything. Hufflepuffs are just and hardworking. There's nothing to be ashamed of there, even if you are a badger."

"Intellectual snob."

"Edward Cullen."

"Oh for Pete's sake, ladies. If you're going to keep arguing, I'm leaving," Martha declared from her very comfy chaise lounge.

"She's such a Slytherin," Alexis stage whispered to Cassie. Cassie nodded vehemently, her technicolour hair (now shades of green and blue like a mermaid) flicking with the movement.

Alexis turned back to the mirror. She felt the fabrics of both the dresses. "As much as I like this one, I don't think the fabric will breathe very well under the gowns we have to wear," Alexis admitted, looking at the eggplant dress lovingly.

"I gotta be honest with you, sweets. I think that one is a little old for you anyway," Cassie disclosed, grabbing the dress and handing it back to the sales assistant.

"I approve completely!" Martha added from her chair.

Cassie snapped her fingers at Martha, still lounging. "C'mon, look alive. We have shoes, a handbag and jewellery to get yet!"

* * *

They were in heaven. Heaven lined with shoes. Martha had insisted that the only place to find appropriate footwear was the Upper East Side, and Cassie was barely containing her drool at being surrounded by such pretty, pretty high heels.

Alexis smiled gratefully at the assistant who was stepping away to bring her several styles to try on. "Cassie, I have a bone to pick with you."

"Moi? Whatever could I have done?" Cassie asked innocently, inspecting a pair of plaid pumps and nearly weeping when she saw the price tag.

"True or false? You were the one who made my father look like a rotting corpse; a disguise, I'll inform you, which allowed him to defeat me at an epic battle of laser tag that has been ongoing for over a decade," Alexis was giving an interrogation so freakishly similar to one Kate would give, it was almost scary.

Cassie raised her hands innocently. "I did nothing. Nothing. The zombie makeup was done in order to ensure that justice prevailed. If your Dad chose to use his powers for evil, then that's on him."

"Darling, that make up was fabulous. Where did you learn how to do that?" Martha asked.

"Make up isn't really all that different to art. It's just painting, with a face as a canvas," Cassie answered. "Nobody ever really taught me anything. I just experimented and figured it out."

"You wanna come run a stage make up course at my acting school?" Martha mused.

Cassie shrugged. "I guess I could. I used to do makeup for the girls before they went to work at the Moulin often enough."

The shop assistant came back with the shoes Alexis had asked for. She slipped her feet into a pair of black wedges, before standing and strutting in them.

"No. You look like a Clydesdale, darling," Martha decided. Alexis modelled several other pairs of shoes, all of which were instantly dismissed by either Cassie or Martha.

"Oh, those are it," Cassie sighed.

"They are perfect," Martha agreed.

Alexis looked down at the Swarovski crystal encrusted heels with a tiny, longing smile. "You really think so? I'm not going to tumble over in them, am I?"

"There is no question. You lit up the second you put those shoes on," Martha insisted.

"Cinderella is proof that the right pair of shoes can change your life. Those are life changing heels," Cassie insisted.

Alexis's hesitation was momentary, and most probably for Cassie's benefit. "I'll take them," Alexis announced to the shop assistant. Cassie resisted the urge to shake her head. She wished she had that kind of cash to drop on a pair of shoes.

"Alrighty, mi amore, I think you might finally be set. You've got a dress, you have a truly fabulous pair of shoes, and your jewellery is purchased. See, you have nothing to panic about," Cassie said as they trotted out of the Christian Louboutin store.

"I still don't have a Valedictorian's address," Alexis reminded her.

"You don't have a Valedictorian's address because you're overthinking it. You need to get out of your headspace, darling," Martha informed her breezily, every inch the acting coach. "You need to stop thinking, and start to feel."

"Gram, you make it sound so easy. But I'm no actress. I have to intellectualise everything!"

"Have you ever thought that could be your problem?" Martha asked with an enigmatic grin. "Oh, look at the time. I have a Lecoq master class in an hour, and I need to prepare!" Martha enveloped the girls in perfumed hugs, and disappeared into a cab in a flurry of silk and jewels.

"Looks like it's just you and me, Kid," Cassie announced with a lilt in her tone.

"Wanna do sushi?" Alexis asked.

"So keen for sushi. I'm about to pass out I'm so hungry."

* * *

Alexis looked at the spread that Cassie was setting out across her dining room table. "We cannot eat this much food."

"We're not going to. I messaged Katie and your Dad and told them to get their asses here," Cassie informed her with a grin.

"I'm certain that there is a method behind your madness."

"Always. There is always madness. Sometimes method. You know, however it goes," Cassie ruminated. "But in this case, there is something from column A, and column B," She paused to dish out soy sauce. "I don't know if you've noticed anything new, different and exciting, but I kinda have. Kate is like, way less jaded right now. She hasn't given me too many ins and outs as to exactly why, but I'm suspecting your Dad has something to do with it. I saw them talking at the end of the zombie case," Alexis pulled a face at the memory of having the living daylights scared out of her from Cassie's makeup job "And it was like all the crap between them got squashed down."

"What do you mean squashed down?" Alexis wondered.

"Oh, I mean, clearly, they haven't discussed all their issues. There was nowhere near enough theatrics for that. But, it's like they cut the crap. They've stopped the bullshit hurting each other because they can. It's like the past few weeks haven't happened or something."

"So you want to see them together to see a change in the dynamic?" Alexis confirmed.

"Oh, my young Padawan learner, I love it so much when we're on the same wavelength."

* * *

The sushi had been outstanding. Alexis gave Cassie a furtive look. Something had _totally_ changed. Cassie gave Alexis a mischievous look. Time for Plan Something Really Witty and Intelligent (they hadn't been able to agree on a name) to commence.

Cassie quickly excused herself from the table. Moments later, she reappeared with Vera in hand, and joined everybody in the living room, where Alexis had directed them to move. She sat herself on the floor. A few twists of the tuners later, Cassie had the guitar in tune, and began to pluck out a melody.

"You play guitar?" Castle asked.

Cassie nodded. "Since I was six years old. Had to do every cool thing my big sister did," Cassie shot Kate an evil grin. She began to strum a riff, resisting the urge to stick out her tongue at Kate.

"Did not pick you as an AC/DC fan."

"Oh, I'm not, really. Their stuff is really fun to play live, but I had my first experience of the awesomeness that is Bon Scott when I was in kindergarten. Katie went through this crazy hard rock phase when she was like sixteen, seventeen. I was the only kid in my class who knew every word to _Enter Sandman_."

"Jeez, Beckett. Child abuse much?" Castle joked. Kate jabbed him in the ribs swiftly with her elbow.

"You cannot talk, Dad. You used to sing me to sleep with _Guns'N'Roses," _Alexis interjected swiftly.

"You are joking! That is hilarious!" Cassie gasped. She immediately began to play the riff to _Welcome to the Jungle._

"It was the only music I knew all the words to!" Castle defended himself.

"And you accuse me of child abuse," Kate muttered darkly.

"I have nothing to complain about. I was a totally cool kid. And you and your greaser boyfriend only locked me in the bathroom like, three times, tops," Cassie started playing the opening chords of _Smells Like Teen Spirit, _tongue between her teeth, waiting for Kate's response.

"Ty vedeshʹ sebyauzhasno mnogo, kak kto-to, kto ne khochet, chtoby mesto, chtoby spatʹ nochʹyu," (You're acting an awful lot like somebody who doesn't want a place to sleep tonight,) Kate growled.

Cassie smirked. "Vy nikogda ne khoteli udaritʹ menya. Vy by golodatʹ." (You'd never kick me out. You'd starve.)

"Why do you have your guitar with you, anyway?" Kate asked, desperate to change the subject from her teenage delinquency. She was blushing way too much, and she knew she'd never live Castle's teasing down.

"Oh, last night after work I ended up jamming with the boys. They're playing pretty much any and every gig they can get at the moment, and I was helping them shift their repertoire from Aussie pub rock to _The Wedding Singer _and bah mitzvahs. Ended up crashing there and headed straight here in the AM." Cassie explained easily.

"You slept there?" Kate echoed.

"Urgh, not my brightest idea, I'll admit. Those boys have no idea about basic sanitation. But there was no way I was going to attempt to get my ass home from the ass crack of Brooklyn at 4am."

"So you went from bar music to wedding singing? How did that go?" Alexis asked. Cassie was relieved she was sticking to the plan.

"It was fun. The boys are all about changing up the classics, so we got a couple of sweet sounding covers."

"You just walked into that. You have to play something for us now," Castle challenged. Kate nodded along, her face mirroring Castle's tone.

"Well, there is no way you guys are getting a Cassie Beckett original. Your brains will explode from all the awesome," Cassie informed them decisively. "However, we fooled around with a stripped back, acoustic feel on this song. The boys hated it, but I thought it was pretty sick, and it goes a little something, like this," Cassie pulled a face before beginning to sing.

_Baby, can't you see__  
__I'm calling__  
__A guy like you__  
__Should wear a warning__  
__It's dangerous__  
__I'm fallin'_

_There's no escape__  
__I can't wait__  
__I need a hit__  
__Baby, give me it__  
__You're dangerous__  
__I'm lovin' it_

Cassie exchanged a look with Alexis. Her smoky cover of the Britney classic was having the desired effect. Cassie flicked her eyebrows before continuing.

_Too high__  
__Can't come down__  
__Losing my head__  
__Spinning 'round and 'round__  
__Do you feel me now_

_With a taste of your lips__  
__I'm on a ride__  
__You're toxic__  
__I'm slipping under__  
__With a taste of poison paradise__  
__I'm addicted to you__  
__Don't you know that you're toxic__  
__And I love what you do__  
__Don't you know that you're toxic_

_I__t's getting late_

_To give you up__  
__I took a sip__  
__From my devil cup__  
__Slowly__  
__It's taking over me_

_Too high__  
__Can't come down__  
__It's in the air__  
__And it's all around__  
__Can you feel me now_

_With a taste of your lips__  
__I'm on a ride__  
__You're toxic__  
__I'm slipping under__  
__With a taste of poison paradise__  
__I'm addicted to you__  
__Don't you know that you're toxic__  
__And I love what you do__  
__Don't you know that you're toxic_

_Don't you know that you're toxic__  
__Taste of my lips and having fun__  
__With a taste of your lips__  
__I'm on a ride__  
__You're toxic__  
__I'm slipping under__  
__With a taste of poison paradise__  
__I'm addicted to you__  
__Don't you know that you're toxic__  
__And I love what you do__  
__Don't you know that you're toxic_

_With a taste of your lips__  
__I'm on a ride__  
__You're toxic__  
__I'm slipping under__  
__With a taste of poison paradise__  
__I'm addicted to you__  
__Don't you know that you're toxic__  
__And I love what you do__  
__Don't you know that you're toxic_

Cassie sneaked a look at Kate and Castle. If she could bottle that sexual tension, she'd never have to worry about working behind a bar again. It was blatantly obvious that they'd both forgotten that there were other people in the room.

_I'm intoxicated now__  
__I think you'll love it now__  
__I think I'm ready now__  
__I think I'm ready now__  
__I'm intoxicated now__  
__I think you'll love it now__  
__I think I'm ready now_

Cassie let the last note of the song ring out. She bit her lip and caught Alexis's eye. The plan was a total success. Both Castle and Kate were eating out of the palm of their hands.

"So… What did you think?" Cassie asked innocently, chewing on her lip as she waited for a response.

"That was not what I was expecting," Castle admitted, when he was finally able to tear his gaze away from Kate.

"Oh yeah? How so?"

"Well, based on what I saw at the Old Haunt…"

"You know, both our perceptions were coloured that night. Don't assume that I'm a one dimensional artist," Cassie interrupted him hastily. She hadn't spoken a word to Kate about what had gone down the night that Castle had gone on his Slaughter motivated bender, and she really didn't want to bring it up again.

"I think I liked the song that you played for me the other night more," Kate interjected quietly. Cassie shook her head gently at Kate. There was no way she'd be playing anything like that tonight. And there was also no _way_ that Kate was going to turn the table on her.

"What, this one?" Cassie asked cheekily. She giggled when she heard the groans that echoed over the song's intro.

_You're insecure__  
__Don't know what for__  
__You're turning heads when you walk through the door_

"Oh, God! Make it stop!" Castle whined. Cassie only wrinkled her nose at him, deliberately making her tone more obnoxious as she continued to mock serenade him

_Don't need make up__  
__To cover up__  
__Being the way that you are is enough__Everyone else in the room can see it__  
__Everyone else but you_

Cassie turned to her big sister, a cheesy grin lighting up her face, giggling when Alexis chimed in for the chorus.

_Baby you light up my world like nobody else__  
__The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed__  
__But when you smile at the ground it aint hard to tell__  
__You don't know__  
__Oh Oh__  
__You don't know you're beautiful_

Cassie continued to play the melody of the song, but couldn't keep singing because of the chronic case of the giggles she'd developed.

"I'm sorry. The boys have a bat mitzvah lined up, so we were screwing around with this song," Cassie attempted to justify herself. "And you know what? The cover they came up with actually isn't _that _awful."

"How can it not be that awful? That band is worse than when Alexis went through her JT phase," Castle whined.

Cassie played a few chords threateningly. "You don't talk smack about JT. You just don't,"

"Dad, we talked about this. You don't talk smack about JT, and I won't say a word about your unrequited love for Molly Ringwald," Alexis added, blue eyes steely.

"You have a crush on Molly Ringwald?" Kate asked incredulously. "How do I not know this about you? Is _Pretty In Pink _or _Sixteen Candles _your favourite?"

Alexis flicked Cassie a secretive wink. Just like that, Plan Something Really Witty and Intelligent was back on track, and the girls could spend the rest of the night observing their subjects in their natural habitats.

* * *

Cassie tied a bandana into her hair and checked her phone. Nothing. She shot off a text.

"_You're ass deep in a case, aren't you? Haven't seen you for nearly two days."_

She slicked on a bright coat of lipstick and tossed it into her handbag. She was out of the elevator and halfway to the subway before she got a response.

"_Yeah, this one's taking all my attention."_ Kate's response was succinct, and it instantly got Cassie's feelers up.

"_I'm on mid shift. I'll swing by later tonight with food for the troops."_

Cassie stepped off the subway and was just about to sign on at work when her phone buzzed.

"_You really don't have to. I'm sure we'll crack something soon. I'll see you at home."_

* * *

Cassie leaned against the wall off the elevator. She hadn't stopped from the second she'd stepped through the door at work, and she was quite looking forward to a long, hot shower. She'd think about feeding Kate later. Cassie brightened when the doors of the elevator opened on her floor.

"Hey, Castle," She greeted cheerfully. She frowned when he pushed past her without a word. Cassie locked eyes with him as the doors of the elevator gently closed. His haunted expression said it all.

Cassie's stomach dropped. Fumbling through her bag, she ripped out her keys as she dashed towards her apartment door. She shoved the key in the lock, and burst through the front door. She'd had several visions of what would await her behind the door. Her imagination hadn't even come close.

She dropped her bag with a heavy thud on the hardwood floor. "Jesus Christ, Katie," her voice slipped out in a strangled whisper. "Wasn't once enough?" Cassie's insides tied themselves into knots at the macabre shrine.

"I never meant for you to see this," Kate rasped, moving quickly to close the shutters that housed her impromptu murder board.

"Don't try and hide it," Cassie demanded. Her shock faded, and anger bloomed in her chest, hot and heavy. "Do you have a fucking death wish, Katie? You've already been shot in the chest over this. Let the case go!"

"I can't," Kate confessed, the shrug of her shoulders undermining the severity of the seriousness of the situation. "I can't let it go. And I can't forget."

"You have to. I've already lost one significant woman in my life to these bastards. I won't lose another."

"Don't you see?" Kate demanded. "Don't you see this is why I _have to_ do this?"

"No Katherine. No, I don't see why you have to risk your fucking life like this. Please, explain it to me," Cassie's rage had turned sarcastic, and she desperately willed the hot tears in her eyes to go away.

"Mom didn't get to see you graduate high school. She didn't get to take you shopping for your first training bra. She never had to give you the talk about the birds and the bees, or explain to you how a tampon works. Mom will never see either of us walk down the aisle. She'll never see us graduate college," Kate reminisced. "Those bastards took something from us that day. They took so much from you. Something we can never replace. They have to face justice for that," Kate's growl was deep.

"And then what happens, Katie? You slay the Dragon, and what? Mom is still going to be dead." Cassie bit her lip, tilting her head upward to try and combat gravity as tears spilt down her cheeks. "Our mother was murdered, Katya. Murdered. It was brutal, and awful, and it chills me to the bone that she was slaughtered in an alley, alone; but it is what it is, and we can never change that."

"You can't do this, Katie. You can't. They are going to kill you. They've already gotten close. You have no idea what people have sacrificed to keep you safe. And you're throwing that in the face of the people who love you the most." Cassie gave up the fight, and looked her big sister in the eye, not even trying to staunch the flow of tears leaking down her cheeks. "Don't you understand? You are all that I have left," Cassie reached out and grabbed Kate's hand. "I am begging you here, Katie. Just leave it alone."

"Are you saying you _knew_ that Castle cut a deal for my life? Like I'm some kind of prize animal?" Kate demanded, her voice dark with unknown emotion.

"He has an entire board like this one saved on his computer. I found it by accident, and after he explained what Montgomery had done for you, the lengths that he was willing to go to in order to keep you safe; he swore me to secrecy," Cassie admitted. "And I'd do it again. If it means that you're alive for all those milestones Mom is going to miss out on, I would do it again in a heartbeat."

"You have _no_ right to decide that. None at all! This is _my_ life we're talking about," Kate snapped.

"But you have the right to decide to leave me completely alone in the world? Fuck. No, Katie. He didn't do this because he has some control freak issues. He did this because he loves you more than anything, and this was the only way he could keep you safe!" Cassie refused to react to Kate's hiss of anger.

"People live their entire lives looking for the kind of love that you're too chicken shit to accept! It is right there, in front of you, but you're too busy being a fucking martyr to a dead cause that you can't see it!" Cassie drew a breath, scraping a hand across a wet cheek. "Katie, I would give up everything for the kind of love that is right in front of you, but you just won't take it."

Kate slammed the shutters of the window closed. She stormed toward her bedroom and swung the door shut with a thud. Moments later, she re-emerged, dressed head to toe in black. She wordlessly stepped over to the safe, slipping her service weapon into her concealed shoulder holster, and clipping her badge to her belt.

"Katie, please," Cassie begged, eyes swimming with tears; the mirror of her fourteen year old self walking into Kate's tiny apartment all those years ago. "You're all I have left. You're all that I have left," she whimpered, curling into a ball on an armchair and smashing her head against her knees.

Kate stepped over to Cassie, running a hand through her hair. "Everybody I've gone up against in this case has ended up dead. The odds are ever in my favour," Kate's attempted at light heartedness fell flat against the ringing echo of Cassie's sobs throughout the apartment. "I will be fine," Kate reassured her. She dropped a kiss on Cassie's head. "I'll see you tomorrow," She promised. Kate walked out of the apartment without a backwards glance.

* * *

**So... you don't even have to press a button now to leave me some feedback. You even get a special message when you do (I'm not even joking. Leave a comment if you don't believe me). And I really do think you should leave me some feedback- this chapter was about ninety different types of challenging for me to write, and it would mean the world to me if you could let me know if you liked it or not!**

**Also, brookemopolitan dot tumblr dot com for all music, dresses and gorgeous SHOES!**


	11. Chapter 11

**I was truly touched by the amazing response I received for the last chapter. I'm so glad that you all enjoyed it enough to tell me so. Please, keep up the amazing feedback. It makes my time writing so much more enjoyable. **

**For those playing at home, I posted the one shot celebrating 100 reviews of this fic. It's called _A Mother's Treasure_and it features a few little offshoots from this world. It was also the first time I've written Johanna Beckett, which was fun.**

**As always, big props go out to my amazing beta. I actually doubt my ability to write a cohesive narrative without her holding my hand.**

**Disclaimer: No, really. I don't think AM has a possum named Fitzpatrick living in his roof.**

* * *

It was like time had stood still. Cassie sat, immobilised, staring at the shutters that hid the images of her mother's maimed body. She had no idea how much time had passed. She had no idea if she'd even been awake the entire time. Eventually, she forced herself to move. She quickly stretched out her limbs, before picking up her phone and speed dialling Kate's number. No response. Cassie forced herself to think rationally. There were a thousand reasons why Kate wouldn't answer her phone. It didn't mean she was lying in an alley, leaking blood from a hundred wounds. Cassie forced herself not to think about that. It was time for action.

Grabbing the iPod dock from the living room, Cassie wrenched it from the wall. She walked to the bathroom, shedding her work uniform as she went. She chose her loudest, angriest playlist, and cranked the hot water. As she waited for the room to steam up, Cassie ripped her hair into a braid, and stood at the basin, clad only in her underwear, and studied her features in the mirror. Her whole life, she'd been told she was the carbon copy of her big sister, but it was only now that she was beginning to see it. She had that same haunted look in her eyes. The same desperation, the pain of a loved one ripped away too soon.

Cassie watched; her chin jutted out proudly as the mirror slowly fogged up. If this was what it meant to idolise her sister, then so be it. If Kate continued down the rabbit hole, she'd be trapped there, and Cassie would be the next Beckett woman attached to a case that would never be solved; trapped by her own grief.

Satisfied with the amount of steam in the room, Cassie shut off the hot water, but flicked on the small heater in the room that she'd stowed in there. Throwing an old towel on the floor, Cassie stepped into the mountain pose, and concentrated on her Pranayama Breathing Series. Once she was satisfied that her breathing was on track, Cassie moved into the half-moon pose, before forcing her body into the twenty six poses that made up Bikram yoga. After an hour and a half of twisting her body into shape after shape, Cassie sat on the floor, dripping sweat and forcing herself to breathe correctly.

It hadn't worked.

Cassie's mind was still flooded with images of her mother, both alive and vivacious, and then in the stark, harsh images captured by CSU in meticulous, almost scientific detail; slumped in an alleyway, leaking blood into the grime of the asphalt. Cassie forced the bile that was rising in her throat down. In conjunction with the images that had haunted her dreams since she was fourteen was fresh horror. Visions of Kate; taken down by a sniper's bullet. Kate, alone in an alley way, a gruesome mirror of their mother, slaughtered like an animal for coming just that little bit too close to uncovering the truth.

Cassie pressed a fist to her mouth, before blindly reaching into the shower and cranking the hot water. She forced herself to step back into the Mountain Pose, and started all over again.

* * *

After three hours of Hot Yoga, and a brief but burning shower, Cassie was in a post exercise, slightly achey state of fluff. The endorphins from her workout had collided with the exhaustion from hours sitting, staring a hole into the wall. Blindly, Cassie collapsed into bed.

She shouldn't have bothered. The images she fought so hard to push away when she was awake swarmed her subconscious. She was powerless to stop them, each vision more vivid and gut wrenching than the next.

Cassie woke up, lathered in sweat. She tore the sheets off her bed, marching down to the laundry room and forcing them into a washer; heedless of the fact that she was clad only in an oversize Batman tee shirt she'd stolen from Tommo at one point or another.

She remade her bed with fresh sheets. She reorganised every bookshelf in the apartment, organising each shelf into sub-genre and alphabetical order. She did the same with the collection of DVDs. Any menial task that could possibly be performed around the apartment, Cassie attacked with gusto.

* * *

There was nothing left for her to do. Each surface in the apartment had been rigorously cleaned (except for the shutters that Kate had hidden her murder board in. Cassie avoided those like the plague). Any collection in the apartment had been meticulously organised. There was nothing that Cassie could do to avoid thinking. She certainly couldn't attempt something artistic; she wouldn't risk her broken heart spilling into music or onto a canvas. If she did that, her suffering would become all too real. She much preferred it in her head, where she could pretend it was all just a figment of her imagination.

She stood before her now colour co-ordinated wardrobe and gently slid a modest, dark dress from the hanger, before dressing with meticulous care. She slipped her feet into her sturdy black Doc Martens, before twisting her hair off her face, clipping it back with an accessory bought in a Turkish market years before.

Cassie was careful to lock the door after herself, and slipped into the elevator. She felt like a deflated balloon as she stopped at a local florist, before hailing a cab and whispering an address.

* * *

Cassie let out a sigh as she stood, head bowed, at the tombstone. She'd always found the notion of a graveyard a curious thing. Her mother wasn't there anymore. She was nothing but the sum of parts in a coffin, wasting away under the earth.

Cassie dropped the flowers she'd bought. She stared at them for a moment, before kneeling and propping them against the tombstone with more care.

"Privet, Mama," (Hi, Mommy,) Cassie whispered, fingers reaching out to trace the J carved into marble. She quashed the voices in her head that whispered to her about how stupid this was; that her mother couldn't hear her because she was dead.

"I know I haven't been along to visit in a while," Cassie whispered, fingers tracing along her mother's name.

"But I got that letter that you wrote me. The one from when I was born," Her voice hitched slightly, but Cassie refused to give into tears. "I just wanted to say that I've _lived_, Mama. I've lived as much as I can." Cassie's hand dropped to her side.

"I saw the world. I saw the places that meant the most to you. You know, I sobbed for an hour in the gardens at Versailles, after I read the journal entry you wrote there. About how it was the place that convinced you that you _had_ to be a criminal lawyer. That you had to stand up for the people who were voiceless." Cassie drew a breath.

"I've tried so hard to be a person. A person not formed by tragedy," Cassie paused, before leaning against the tombstone. "You know, I've forgotten what you smelt like? I've forgotten what it feels like to be hugged by you, and that feeling of being so completely safe. Like nothing can ever touch me," Cassie wrapped her arms around herself, her head leaning against the headstone, trying to recreate the feeling.

"I've forgotten a lot of things. But I've never forgotten you. I never will. Your loss was… Eto bylo samoe khudshyee, chto sluchalosʹ so mnoĭ," (It was the worst thing to ever happen to me,) Cassie sighed, "But I moved on. I miss you every day, and I wish you were here, with me, but I know you can't be," Cassie felt the vibration of her phone. She dumped it from her pocket into her handbag, not bothering to check the ID of the text message.

"I grieved you, Mama. It hurt then, and it still hurts now, and I miss you like fucking crazy. And it's all I can do. What I can't do is grieve all over again. Katya sobiraet·sya poluchitʹ sebya ubil, i net ni cherta ne mogu s etim podelatʹ," (Katya is going to get herself killed, and there isn't a damn thing I can do about it,) Cassie growled, her grief tinged with anger now.

"Ona v pogone za ublyudkov, chto sdelal eto dlya vas. Oni uzhe pustil sebe pulyu v grudʹ. Eto vsego lishʹ vopros vremeni, kogda oni perestayut yee postoyanno. I ya ne mogu perezhitʹ eto," (She's chasing the bastards that did this to you. They've already put a bullet in her chest. It's only a matter of time before they stop her permanently. And I cannot survive that,) Cassie's hands rolled into fists, her teeth clenched against her harsh words.

"Do you hear me, Mama? If she dies, I will not survive it. And I don't know what to do," Cassie confessed, the fear and confusion pouring out of her in waves.

"How do I convince her that this isn't worth dying for? The Dragon has already taken one Beckett woman off the earth; he has no right to take another," Cassie bowed her head, willing the answer to come to her from on high.

Cassie turned to face the headstone. She ran her fingers lovingly across her mother's name, before pressing a kiss to cold fingers and touching them to the Latin inscription.

"YA lyublyu tebya , Mama. Pozhaluĭsta, daĭte mne slovo, chtoby derzhatʹ yee bezopasnoĭ," (I love you, Mama. Please, give me the words to keep her safe,) Cassie whispered. She stood, her head bowed. After several moments of silence, she turned, and made her way to the street.

* * *

It wasn't until Cassie was in a cab that she checked that text message. She crumbled into the seat slightly when she realised it wasn't from Kate.

_Berry Pavlova, I don't know if anything is going on at your end, but my Dad is refusing to go into the Precinct, and he looks like a Dementor got his soul. Is Kate ok? Did something happen? Ginger Snap xx_

Cassie let out a mirthless chuckle at the text. She couldn't even begin to answer it. She shoved the phone back into her bag and leaned over to the cabbie.

"Change of direction," she announced. She rattled off the address of the 12th Precinct, and sat back in the cab, fresh determination in her chest. Surely, _surely_ she could get Kate to see reason from inside the precinct. If not, she could always have a few of the uniformed cops she'd seen checking out her ass barricade Kate in the break room if she looked like she was going to run off and do something stupid.

Cassie's attention was drawn when traffic screeched to a halt. She'd been in such a daze all day that she hadn't even realised the time. She was trying to take a cab across Manhattan in the middle of peak hour traffic. Bad, bad plan.

Cassie looked out the window and got her bearings. "Hey, boss," she addressed the cabbie. "I can run faster than this," she announced. She quickly checked the meter, and tossed a wad of notes at him, not waiting for the change. "Have a good one!" She called out, before sliding out of the cab and onto the sidewalk.

Cassie took every short cut and backstreet she knew, and made it to the homicide division of the 12th Precinct in record time. She skidded out of the stairwell (the elevator ride was too long), and dashed to the desk of the first detective she recognised.

"Where's Kate?" She rasped, slightly breathless from her run through Midtown.

Ryan looked up at her, a frown creasing across his brow. "Didn't she tell you?"

"Tell me what?"

"She quit."

Cassie stared at Ryan, her breath catching in her chest. "She _what?_" Cassie echoed.

Ryan grabbed Cassie by the elbow, pulling her over to sit down in an interview room. He quietly recounted the story of Kate and Espo pursuing the suspect alone. He spared her no detail; Cassie had to press her fist to her mouth to stop from crying out when she heard about Kate dangling from a rooftop.

"Thank you," Cassie interjected quietly, reaching over to gently squeeze Ryan's hand. The same hand that had been responsible for wrenching Kate to safety.

"Gates dragged Beckett and Esposito into her office. She reamed them out, and told them they were suspended. Beckett handed over her gun, and her badge. She stormed out and cleared her desk. I haven't seen her since," Ryan concluded the story.

Cassie pulled out her phone, quickly dialling Kate's number.

"Voicemail," she announced.

"She hasn't answered any of my calls, either."

Cassie dialled Castle's number. No answer.

"What the hell is she _thinking?_ She's completely unprotected now," Cassie muttered. She looked over at Ryan. "I'm going to swing back home. She might have gone there. Call Lanie, and keep trying Castle," Cassie ordered, picking up her bag and dashing out of the precinct, phone pressed to her ear.

* * *

Kate wasn't at the apartment. She wasn't down doing laundry, she wasn't at the gym, and she wasn't at her favourite little Greek café around the corner. Cassie sighed. She briefly considered checking out some of Kate's favourite haunts across the city, but instantly dismissed it. New York was way too big, and she didn't want to risk missing Kate if she came back here.

Cassie had tried calling every single mutual friend she and Kate had in the city. She'd even tried Dr. Motorcyle Boy, (his phone number found in an old address book of Kate's) only to have the call go to voicemail. She couldn't leave a message. It was just too ridiculous.

Cassie flipped through the address book. There was only one number left to call. She stared at the numerals, written down in Kate's favourite purple pen. The neat strokes mocked her. Cassie's eyes flicked from the page to the teacart that sat in the corner of the living room. Perhaps some Dutch courage would do the trick. Cassie was halfway across the room before she froze. She wouldn't do it. She wouldn't be like him.

She forced herself to sit back down on the couch. She could drown her sorrows later. She picked up her phone, and typed in the numbers and hit call before she could talk herself out of it.

"Hello?" The voice at the other end answered. "Hello? Is someone there?"

Cassie chewed on her lip hard enough to draw blood. "Hi…" She whispered. "It's…it's Cassandra."

There were several stunned seconds of silence after Cassie identified herself. The voice on the other end of the line proclaimed how glad he was that she'd finally called, and how much he wanted to work out the problems between the two of them.

Cassie attempted to stem the monologue several times. After her third attempt to cut him off failed, she snapped. "Jim! I did not call you for absolution!"

"Jim?" Her father repeated. "Since when am I Jim? I'm your Dad, Cassie."

"Don't try and change the subject. That isn't why I'm calling. All I want to know is if you've seen Kate today?"

"Why would I have seen Kate today?"

"It doesn't matter why. Just answer the question! Have you seen her or not?" Cassie demanded.

"No, I haven't. Cassie, what's going on? Why…"

"If you see her, can you please call me? It doesn't matter why, just do it," Cassie cut him off abruptly.

"Even if I don't see her, can I call you anyway?" Jim asked.

Cassie pondered. She was in no state to deal with her daddy issues on top of her big sister issues and dead mommy issues.

"I don't see why you would. I didn't call you so that you could wax lyrical about how sorry you are that you abused me for five years," Cassie stated coldly. "You couldn't be bothered to make amends all those years ago, I can't see why anything would be different now." She ended the call and threw her phone against the cushions of the couch with a huff.

* * *

The shutters were taunting her. No matter what Cassie did, she could see those shutters in the apartment. Calling to her. Cassie steadfastly ignored them. She'd long since given into temptation. She sat on the couch, a bottle of vodka loosely in her grasp. She was disgusted with herself. She'd spent a quarter of her life living with a man who'd used substances to escape his reality, and she hated him for it. Yet, she couldn't stop herself from doing the same thing. Cassie took another swig from the bottle, promising herself that she'd stop once she had a light buzz, and she wouldn't let herself get completely wasted.

She sighed heavily, before checking her phone. The last message she'd received had been one from Alexis, delighted that her Valedictorian speech had been a success. Nothing from Kate. No update from Ryan, who had his ear to the ground at the precinct for anything that even loosely matched a description of Kate, or the guy they'd had in their sights this afternoon. Cassie actually would have been grateful for a call from her father, if it meant that her big sister was alive and breathing.

Cassie started at the shutters. If she was going to be a Beckett and drown in addiction, she may as well do it properly. After draining a large mouthful from the bottle, Cassie screwed the top back onto the bottle, stood up and wrenched the shutters open. She refused to flinch, and she stared each of the images down. She forced the tears to remain at bay, and she gazed at the connections that Kate's neat handwriting had made.

Cassie felt the familiar squeezing of her lungs as she stared at the murder board. Her terror rose further, when she realised that this time, there was no Kate to talk her out of her panic attack. Cassie tried to force herself to take deep breaths, and stumbled her way to the kitchen. Her breathing was shallow and uneven as she took quick, sharp breaths. She grabbed a paper bag from the drawer that she'd neatly organised that morning, and quickly bunched it over her mouth.

Cassie sank to the ground, willing her body to calm down, and her breathing to regulate.

* * *

Kate was completely drenched. Not in a ran-from-the-car-to the-building-in-the-rain spattered, she well and truly resembled a drowned rat.

But there was no time to worry about that. She'd wasted way too much time. She gave a polite wave to the doorman as she stepped into the elevator. She unlocked her phone, barely acknowledging the notifications of missed calls and text messages. There would be time for those later. She couldn't allow herself to get distracted from the goal. Only one thing mattered now. She flicked to her favourite numbers and pressed call.

Kate pressed the phone to her ear and waited. When the call went to voicemail, Kate hit the end button. She watched as the flashing red of her dying battery faded to black. She really would have to worry about those missed calls later.

Kate stepped off the elevator, shoving her dead phone in her pocket. Walking to the door, she took a moment to gather her wits. This was it. This was her moment. She raised a fist and rapped at the door.

* * *

Cassie was slumped against the kitchen counter. Her breathing had returned to normal, but the lack of sleep and alcohol fighting the adrenaline buzz that was fading from her system left her floppy and exhausted.

There was no way she'd get a decent amount of sleep tonight. Looking at that murder board was the stupidest possible thing she could have done. It would plague her dreams for the rest of her life.

Cassie picked up her phone and dialled Kate's number. She'd lost count of how many times she'd called. The call went straight to voicemail. Cassie didn't have it in her to leave one more pleading message. All she wanted to do was forget. She wanted to burrow into the safety of her bed, and not be haunted by the images her subconscious had created.

Cassie forced herself to stand up, and stumbled her way to the bathroom. Grabbing her toothbrush, she squeezed a hefty amount of toothpaste onto the bristles and began to scrub viciously at her teeth, desperate to scour the taste of defeat out of her mouth. She rinsed and spat, before neatly replacing the brush and paste to their spot in the cabinet.

A small box caught her eye. Cassie picked it up, reading the label. _"Ms. Katherine Beckett. Take two pills every six hours for pain as necessary. Do not exceed four doses in a day. Do not consume medication when operating heavy machinery. Do not consume medication within eight hours of consuming alcohol."_ Cassie slid the medication from the box, inspecting the painkillers left over from Kate's surgery.

She stared at the little white pills in their foil tray. A voice in the back of her head warned her that this was a very bad idea. Cassie forced that voice to be quiet. What did it matter? There was nobody left to miss her.

Cassie turned the tap on and filled up the little cup that sat next to the basin. She popped one of the pills from its capsule. She stared at it for a second, deliberating.

"Na zdorov'e," (To your health) Cassie whispered to the empty apartment. Throwing caution and good sense into the wind, Cassie placed the pill on her tongue, and downed the cup of water. She shuffled back to her bedroom, deliberately avoiding the living room. She placed her phone on the charger, and stripped off her Doc Martens and dress. Cassie burrowed underneath her comforter, staring out her window at the lightening and tumbling rain, before gratefully succumbing to the fuzzy tendrils of black that made her limbs grow heavy and made her feel like she was floating in the same breath.

* * *

**I want to be very clear- just because I wrote that final scene, does NOT mean that I agree with Cassie's actions. Substance abuse is not a joke.**

**But I would love to hear what you think.**


	12. Chapter 12

**There was a very interesting mix of responses from people with the last chapter. Some people were angry at Kate, some people can't believe Cassie would do something so stupid. Either way, people had a REALLY strong reaction, which was a very exciting thing for an author to see. I have a few more detailed notes at the end.**

**Again, Tad, thanks for the support, and the squees ;)**

**Disclaimer: I don't think AM and co are sleeping on their little sister's top bunk right now**

* * *

Kate couldn't remember a time that she'd been so incandescently happy. She stretched out across the ridiculously soft sheets with a satisfied groan.

"I didn't get to say it," She murmured.

"Say what?" Rick asked her, his hand snaking out to trace the elegant line of her spine.

Kate scraped her hair off her face and let out a decidedly girlish giggle. "I had this whole speech planned. Then when you opened the door, it completely evaporated from my mind," she admitted, pressing her face against a pillow to hide her blush.

She'd piqued his interest now. "What were you going to say?"

Kate bit her lip, reaching out a hand to brush his cheek. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for everything I put you through. The worry, the guilt. And I am _so_ sorry for making you believe for even a second that I don't love you. Because I do," Kate leaned towards him and brushed a kiss against his lips. "I love you _so_ much, Rick Castle." Her smile was luminous, and she couldn't help the giggle that escaped her when Rick pulled her close and pressed smacking kisses against her throat and cheeks.

"Can I ask you a question that will probably make you laugh at me?" He asked. Kate wrinkled her nose playfully, but nodded.

"When did you realise?"

"Realise that I love you?" Kate clarified. She ruminated over the question for a moment. "I cannot fix on the hour, or the look, or the words, which laid the foundation. It is too long ago. I was in the middle before I knew that I had begun," with her answer, she placed a hand on his face, and kissed him soundly.

Rick broke the kiss. "Did you just quote _Austen_?" His tone was incredulous.

"I did. My taste spreads past pulp fiction," Kate teased.

Rick's jaw dropped. "You did not just accuse me of writing pulp fiction!" His eyes sparkled with mischief, and he flipped Kate onto her back, proceeding to blow loud raspberries on her stomach, spurred on by her squeals. Kate's fingers ran through his hair as she pealed with laughter, and he nuzzled his cheek against the soft skin of her belly, his stubble scraping against her flesh.

"I found your tattoo," he announced, lightly tracing the cherry blossom on her hip with the pad of his finger. He turned his head to look at her, silently wondering if he'd ever get the story behind it.

Kate's hand slipped through his hair, nails scratching lightly against his scalp. "I was seventeen, and the master of my own destiny. I had a fake I.D and an attitude I needed a wheelbarrow to carry around. When I decided that I wanted to do something, I was doing it, common sense, my parents' wishes, and the law be damned," Kate's eyes were alight with cheekiness with the memory, and she tweaked his ear playfully before continuing.

"I was a rampant little feminist, and in Chinese culture, the cherry blossom is a symbol of female dominance. It also represents feminine sexuality and beauty. I originally wanted a whole branch of them running up my side," Kate traced a line up the side of her body, from her hip to her ribcage. "But I didn't really take into account my fear of needles. Or the pain factor. I bitched out after this one."

Rick pressed a kiss on the inked image. "I like it," he whispered against her skin. He moved to trace the words that lined her opposite collarbone. "But I think I might like this one better," he confessed, pressing a line of kisses along the words.

"My whole adult life has centred around the fact that my Mom died. But what was going to happen when I slayed the Dragon? She's still going to be gone," Kate laced her fingers with Rick's, and she moved a hand to his face to get him to look at her.

"I quit," She confessed.

"Looking for him? God, Kate. I'm so relieved."

"My job," Kate clarified quietly. Rick wasn't quick enough to filter the shocked expression that crossed his face, and for that Kate was grateful.

"How do you feel?" Rick asked, voice hushed.

"I don't know." Kate pulled his face to hers, placing a lingering kiss on his lips.

"Right now, I'm feeling like I want you as close to me as humanly possible…"

* * *

Kate was a myriad of feelings. Parts of her had such a delicious ache it brought a faint blush to her cheeks, and other parts just felt like they'd been thrown off a building. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so light. It was like a giant anvil had been lifted from her chest. She let a satisfied sigh escape her lips, and stretched, catlike, against the pillows and sat up. She snagged Castle's shirt from where it had been tossed haphazardly over a lamp, and slid it on. She also grabbed a pair of Castle's boxers and pulled them on, before padding out of the room.

A memory of years gone by slipped through Kate's mind as she whipped up her mother's famous pancake recipe. Kate suppressed an unladylike snort in her coffee cup, and nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard the door swing open. Her hand flew to her hip, and her heart pounded when she realised she was unarmed.

Kate forced herself to relax when she recognised the red hair that walked through the door. A new wave of panic broke over her when she realised that Alexis was heading towards the kitchen, and Kate was in there alone, wearing her father's clothing, making freaking _pancakes_, the universal language of "thank you _so _much for last night."

Kate forced her breathing to regulate. She was a strong, empowered woman. She could deal with this.

"Detective Beckett?" Alexis greeted her incredulously.

"It's just Kate, now, actually," Kate replied quickly, her awkwardness magnifying a hundred fold as she actually started twisting the hem of her (his?) shirt, waiting for Alexis to unleash her daughterly fury of a thousand suns upon her.

Kate was preparing herself for a myriad of reactions. She had _not_ prepared herself for Alexis to pull her into a crushing embrace (no, really, Alexis was actually pressing her bruised ribs in a way that was slightly uncomfortable) and start squealing.

"I'm so _happy _for you guys!" Alexis squawked.

Kate was forced to improvise slightly. "I'm so relieved that you're ok with this," She confessed.

"You guys are like cookie dough and sleepovers. It would be wrong to not be ok with it," Alexis answered. "Can I help you make breakfast?"

"Only if you tell me all about your graduation."

* * *

Cassie groaned when she finally awoke. Her limbs were totally disconnected from her body, and her mouth felt like sandpaper. She could have slapped herself for being so fucking stupid last night. She quickly grabbed her phone. Nothing.

Cassie forced herself out of the bed. She threw on a pair of denim shorts and a white cheesecloth blouse (the first pieces of clothing she could find), forced on a pair of odd socks, and shoved her feet back into the Docs she'd left strewn on the floor. She hastened to the bathroom, where she brushed her teeth until she felt her gums start to bleed.

Cassie pulled a bottle of water from the refrigerator, and grabbed her handbag, tossing it in along with her phone. She shook it to make sure she could hear the jangle of her keys, and rushed out the door, not sparing a glance at the murder board she left behind.

* * *

Cassie fought off a wave of dizziness as she stumbled out of the cab. She rushed through to the floor of Castle's building and jabbed several times at the button for the elevator, but she was too impatient to wait.

Cassie took off up the stairs of the building. She lurched through the door onto Castle's floor, and pounded at Castle's door, heedless of neighbours who might be sleeping in. She bounded through the front door before it had fully swung open.

Cassie fought to breathe as she stood in shocked silence, observing the scene in front of her. Castle's dining room table had every imaginable pancake topping on it. Castle was staring at her, his hair slightly rumpled. Alexis was pale, frozen between the door and Cassie. And Kate- Kate was _alive._ Alive, and dressed in a burgundy button down. Alive, and she hadn't bothered to inform Cassie of the fact.

"I thought," Cassie's chest heaved with emotion. "I thought you were _dead,_" Cassie gasped out. Cassie spun on her heels, and tore out of the room.

* * *

Hot tears fell thick and fast down Cassie's cheeks as she rode the elevator. She couldn't quite nail the emotions she was feeling, but she was feeling them smack her in the chest like a freight train.

"Darling!" Cassie heard Martha's voice ring through the haze of emotion. A gentle hand grabbed her and pulled her out of the elevator.

"What on earth is the matter?" Martha asked her, bringing her around to sit on the surprisingly comfortable couches in the lobby of the apartment building.

"Kate… She isn't dead," Cassie gasped out. "She isn't dead, she was here, and I didn't know, and I thought the worst…and I don't know what my feelings are doing," Cassie panted between sobs. She felt hysterical; and she wondered if Martha would slap her to make her stop acting like such a moron.

A pair of arms wrapped around Cassie. Soft and firm, soothing her in a way that she hadn't felt since she was nine years old. Cassie allowed herself to relax into Martha's arms, to take the comfort that existed only in a mother's embrace, the comfort that she'd almost forgotten over the years. Cassie's sobs eventually quieted, and she clung tightly to Martha, absorbing the motherly smell that emanated from her.

"Darling, Kate's here, and she's looking rather anxious to speak to you," Martha purred into Cassie's ear. "But if you'd rather stay like this for a while longer, I'm sure I can convince her to go change."

Cassie shook her head. She pulled away from the embrace slightly. "Oh, God, Martha. Look what I've done to you. I'm so sorry!" Cassie's tears had soaked into the delicate linen of Martha's dress (and Cassie wouldn't have been surprised if there was a mix of snot in there too).

"Oh, don't you worry about that," Martha admonished her. She placed a kiss on Cassie's tear stained cheek. "I'll be right upstairs if you need me. And I mean it," Martha gave Cassie a matriarchal stare. "Anything you need, I'm there in a heartbeat, kiddo," giving Cassie's shoulder a gentle squeeze, Martha glided towards the elevator.

Cassie felt the weight on the couch change as Kate sat down. "Cass…" Kate started.

"What the hell was I supposed to think, Kate?" Cassie demanded, all the fight melting out of her tone. "The last thing I hear from you is that you'll be fine, and that I'll see you tomorrow, and then you drop off the face of the fucking earth. What was I supposed to think? That you were off on a spiritual retreat for your health?" Cassie sniffled, and continued her monologue.

"Do other people mean that little to you? If we're not directly related to Mom's case, then we can just hold our breath and hope that you come out of this in one piece? Katie, I thought you had _died!_ I had Ryan listening out to every call that came into the station, just in case a Caucasian female was found dead in an alley. I called every single person in your damn phone book," Cassie's voice faltered. "I even called Dad," her voice cracked, and Cassie had to look away from Kate's forlorn expression. She wrenched her hands away when Kate tried to reach for her.

"And then, just because I had to inherit a tiny bit of Becketty addiction, I started drinking, had a panic attack and topped it all off with some self medication left over from your surgery." Cassie curled herself up into a ball, and finally looked Kate in the eye.

"Oh, _Cassie_…" Kate shuddered at the thought of what Cassie had nearly done to herself, forcing down the bile that crept up her throat.

"You were dead. In my mind, somebody had murdered you. I was left behind. And then I found you here, playing happy families."

"Cassie," Kate interjected, reaching out to grasp her sister's arm. Cassie flinched, but didn't shrug her off.

"I'm not saying I'm not relieved that you finally got your shit together with Castle. I'm not saying that at all. I'm so happy for you," Cassie's eyes were wide, her chin resting on her knees.

"But would it have killed you to have told me you had an epiphany that all you need is love, and you were off to have lots of sex and babies with Castle?"

"I'm sorry," Kate whispered. She rested her forehead against Cassie's. "I am so, so sorry I made you feel that way." Kate tugged her legs up onto the couch to mirror Cassie's position.

"So I guess that you know about what happened on the roof?" Kate asked. At Cassie's nod, she continued. "Talk about a rude awakening. My entire life got put into startling perspective. You were right, Cassie. You were so right."

"I was?"

"Say I solved the case. Say I figured out who took Mom from us, and why. She still wouldn't be with us anymore. I would have just solved the case, and I would have pushed away everybody I love while I did it. And I've been alone for _so_ long, Cassie."

"I've been a nomad for years," Cassie admitted. "And it's been deliberate. It doesn't matter how much you love something, it can be ripped away in a heartbeat. Any time I felt too comfortable, like I might be putting down roots, I moved. That's why I broke it off with Jacqueline, and that's why I never stayed in a place for longer than two years. Coming back here was as much about escaping the roots I was laying in Sydney as it was seeing you again," Cassie ran a hand through her messy hair.

"I thought I was going to die overseas. I honestly didn't think I'd make it to twenty one," Cassie admitted with a heavy sigh. "I've done a lot of stupid shit in my life," Cassie looked Kate in the eye. "A _lot_ of stupid shit. I've jumped off bridges in Bosnia. I accepted rides off of strangers when I didn't speak their language. I experimented way too much in Amsterdam's red light district. I got held at knifepoint. I had one night encounters with people whose names I never bothered to learn. I just figured that I'd try one dumb stunt too many, and I'd be just another faceless backpacker who took it one step too far," Cassie shrugged, picking at the skin around her thumbnail.

"But I was lying in bed last night, after taking that stupid fucking pill when I realised that if I died, nobody would care," Cassie let out a mirthless laugh. "Sure, maybe a few of the kids I work with at the bar would be sad for like a week, but they'd get over it. My leaving this world wouldn't make a difference to anyone. I've spent so long avoiding making a connection with another person that I've made myself a ghost. I've been so scared of having something torn away from me that I've never let myself have anything in the first place."

"And you end up alone in a cage of your own choosing, looking out between the bars wondering what's wrong with you, because you don't get a happy ending," Kate supplied.

"Exactly."

"God, we are a _mess,_" Kate declared, wiping away a tear from her own eye.

"We are. But we've recognised our inherent messiness, and we're growing as people and accepting ourselves," Cassie declared.

"Speaking of acceptance…" Cassie trailed off. She raised an eyebrow at her sister.

"Somebody has a very happy ending indeed written all over them. Were they pancakes I spied on the table? A little thank you ever so much for last night?" Cassie teased, fluttering her eyelashes.

A blush rose on Kate's cheeks. "It was the best," she admitted with a girlish sigh.

"What, since college?"

"The best _ever._"

Cassie cracked a grin at that. "I knew it,"

"Oh, c'mon Cass. This isn't a tiny bit weird for you?"

"Watching you squirm? Hell, no."

"You are evil." Kate wrapped an arm around Cassie's shoulders, pulling her close. "Do you want to go upstairs? There's a family up there who just might adopt us."

Cassie sniffled and gave Kate a slightly watery grin. "I'm totally down with being the hot Aunty."

Kate's foot shot up and kicked Cassie's butt as they walked towards the elevator.

"Please keep that one between you and me."

"Are you kidding me Kate? Are we really still pretending that he's not your one and done?" Cassie asked.

Kate's hand paused over the button for the elevator. Cassie raised an eyebrow at her.

"No," Kate realised. "No, I'm not pretending that he isn't." She reached out and whacked the button. "But let's not scare him with that information right away."

* * *

Cassie hesitated. She hung at the doorframe, deliberating. She _had_ said anything she needed.

Cassie raised her fist, and tapped lightly on the doorframe.

* * *

Cassie hadn't even made it through a full explanation of what it was she wanted to do before Martha had picked up her handbag and collected Cassie along the way to the door. Before Cassie could fully comprehend what had happened, and the magnitude of her actions, she'd ridden across the city in a town car, and was standing in front of an eerily familiar door.

Cassie raised her hand to knock, before biting down on her lip and turning back to Martha. "I can't do this."

"Don't you dare chicken out now, kiddo. That's why you brought me along for the ride. I won't let you back down."

Cassie took a deep, cleansing breath. She looked at Martha, who simply raised an eyebrow at her. Cassie gently rubbed her collarbone, feeling the inked words of her mother, and knocked on the door before she could talk herself out of it.

"There's nobody home. We should go," Cassie declared quickly, turning to move towards the elevator, trying to drag Martha along with her.

Martha skilfully hooked an arm around Cassie and held her still. "That would be an example of chickening out," she murmured in Cassie's ear.

The door opened.

"Hi, Dad," Cassie whispered, her mouth feeling like cotton wool. She was suddenly glad that Martha had an arm around her; her limbs had suddenly gone to jelly, and the gumption she so prided herself on leaked out her pores.

"Cassie," Jim breathed. He leaned heavily on the doorframe. He reached out like he wanted to touch her cheek, but froze, his hand hanging in mid air, reaching for his baby girl.

"Could we come in?" Martha suddenly took charge, all the while secretly intrigued by the interaction between father and daughter.

"Of course, of course," Jim responded quickly, stepping away from the doorframe and gesturing for them to enter.

* * *

Cassie felt like she'd stepped into a time warp. She hadn't been in this apartment since she was eighteen years old (and even then, she'd only been there for Christmas and Easter once she started boarding school), but it was freakish how little it had changed.

Cassie could feel her father's eyes on her as she inspected the living room. She vaguely heard Martha say something about going to make tea.

Cassie's breath caught in her throat when she saw the mantelpiece. It had always been a source of pride for her mother; Johanna had dubbed it her 'brag wall', and for as long as Cassie could remember, it had been covered in photos of the family. First days at school, Christmases, birthdays, something particularly sassy that either Kate or Cassie had done when there'd been a camera around.

In the centre of the mantelpiece was Johanna's favourite photo of all time. It had been taken the day Cassie was born. Kate was holding her baby sister for the first time, and pressing a kiss to a tiny Cassie's forehead. Johanna had one arm around Kate's shoulders, her other hand playing with the clump of hair on Cassie's head, her forehead resting against one of Kate's schoolgirl braids.

It had been one of the first things to go after Johanna's passing.

The brag wall was back. Most of the photos Cassie remembered from her childhood were there. There were photos from Kate's graduation from the Police Academy, a few of Jim and the man Cassie assumed was his sponsor. Her eyes widened. There were several photos of an adult Cassie. A photo of her next to the Eiffel Tower. A shot of a rugged up Cassie in a snowy Red Square. The Berlin Wall, the Ruins of Troy, Pompeii, the Parthenon, the shoreline of the Great Barrier Reef. Cassie gazed at the images; there was one from nearly every major stop she'd made across the world.

"Katie mentioned to me that you were blogging. She set me up with the Internet so that I could read them all," Jim explained when Cassie whirled around to him.

"Those blogs reminded me _so _much of your mother. You talk like her. You inherited her passion, that Russian temper of hers. You're so beautiful in all those photos, that I had to have them up on my wall, so I could still see you," Jim added, his hand coming up to touch Cassie's shoulder.

Cassie recoiled, and stepped back. "Don't!" She bit out before she could stop herself. "Please, don't touch me," Cassie requested in a more measured tone.

She took a second to gather her thoughts. "In my head, you're still the mean drunk who made me too scared to come home," Cassie didn't miss the flinch that crossed Jim's face. She was aware that she could probably be filtering a little better, but she pushed that thought out of her mind and continued. "You're still the guy who threw beer bottles at me, and turned up to my school wasted and screamed about what a waste of space I was in the middle of the playground. And I'm not saying that to be a bitch," Cassie clarified. "I'm saying it because you need to understand. You need to understand that I've spent years terrified of you. Terrified for you. I used to lie awake at night, trying not to make a noise as I sobbed, wondering what would happen if my Dad died too. Would Katya take me in? Or would I end up in foster care? Or living on the streets? I used to sneak into your room at night to make sure you were still breathing. I was the only kid I knew who understood how important the recovery position was for somebody who'd passed out after drinking too much," Cassie bit her lip, willing herself not to cry.

"I never knew what Daddy I was coming home to. Was it the Daddy that existed before my Mama got stolen? Or this new, hideous breed who didn't care if I lived or died?" Cassie could see that her words were hitting home. She knew that she was probably breaking her Dad all over again, but she needed to get all the hurt out before she could even hope to heal.

"And then Kate sweeps in. I'd begged you for years to stop drinking. You never listened to me. You finally got sober, and all you could do was talk about how wonderful Kate was. About how she was a hero, and she was going to make sure nobody suffered like we suffered," Cassie ran a hand through her mermaid coloured curls.

"But you didn't care about how I'd suffered. You made amends with everybody except me. Was I not important enough? I don't understand what I did to make you decide I wasn't worth the effort," Cassie bit her lip hard enough to draw blood, and turned back to the brag wall.

"Cassie, sit down, please," her father requested. Cassie sighed, but moved to what used to be her favourite spot on the couch set that her parents had owned since before she could remember. Dimly, Cassie wondered what was taking Martha so long with the tea.

"I made so many mistakes," Jim began. "So many, many mistakes. But the biggest ones I made were the ones I made with you."

Cassie managed to hide her flinch at her father's words, pulling her legs up to curl herself into a ball (and tried not to think of the walloping she would have endured if her mother had seen Cassie's Docs on the couch).

"I'm your father. My job is to protect you. And I failed. I failed so miserably at the one thing that I swore to never fail at," Jim scrubbed a hand over his eyes. "And I didn't know how I could come back from that. I didn't know how I was supposed to face you when I'd made you feel like you didn't matter. That you weren't the centre of my universe. I treated you so deplorably, and I was so ashamed. I didn't know if I could ever make amends for that," Jim reached out and put a hand on Cassie's knee, and this time, she didn't shrug him off. "I know I don't deserve your forgiveness. The way I treated you was inexcusable."

Cassie finally looked up at her father.

"I know I'm asking too much of you as it is, but I would really love the opportunity to earn your absolution," Jim plead.

"I've spent a really long time shutting people out," Cassie told her father. She rested her chin against her knees. "I've pushed people away, because I'm too scared to let anybody love me. And it hurts," Cassie admitted with a slight pout. "It hurts too much to push people away," She fiddled with the laces of her boots.

"I don't know if I'll ever be able to forget those years," she admitted. "But I would like to try and have a Daddy again."

* * *

**I did quite a bit of research on the interaction between prescription pain killers and alcohol. I did attempt to show some of the milder side effects of mixing alcohol and pills (disorientation, dizziness, clumsiness, less inhibition with emotion), I didn't talk about some of the more serious effects- it can cause your respiratory system to stop (both drugs are depressants, and they can depress your system so severely it shuts down), liver failure and death. As I said before, the decision I made regarding Cassie was not made lightly, and it is NO joke. Do not try this at home kids.**

**In other news, I may be transitioning over to Extraordinary Lines. I don't write smut, but I'm really not too thrilled with the way some of the changes have been made on this server. With that in mind, I will most likely continue to post this fic on here (and double post there), but it is possible I'll stop posting here all together. **

**Want to give me a prompt for 150 reviews? Make sure you're in it to win it and tell me what you think! Good, bad or ugly, I want to know :D:D**


	13. Chapter 13

**Thank you all so much for all your kind words in your reviews. As it stands, I have yet to make the move over to Extraordinary Lines (I have quite a bit of editing work to do before I repost my work), however, you will be informed when I do. I will also continue posting the rest of this story on here, so if you're not keen to make the move, you can still get the stunning conclusion to this fic (which is still a little while off, don't worry!)**

**As usual, thanks to Tadpole24, who was jetting all over the country and still managed to beta this.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own it, okay?**

* * *

Cassie suppressed a grin when Kate opened the door to the Castle loft like it was her own. "Where the hell did you go? You and Martha disappeared hours ago, and she's been back for a good thirty minutes!" Kate demanded the second Cassie set foot across the threshold.

"I had something to take care of, and I dragged Martha along for moral support," Cassie explained, uncertain if she wanted to evade with what exactly she'd been taking care of. "And then, because I'm an awesome sister, and I figured you probably don't have any panties on, or a toothbrush, I went home and packed you a bag."

Kate took the duffle bag Cassie offered her with a wry grin. "Thanks, Cass," Kate offered sincerely. "But don't think you're getting out of telling me what it was you were up to."

Cassie followed Kate as she trotted back to the kitchen. "Have you told Lanie yet?" Cassie questioned, hoping to distract Kate.

"Not yet. My phone is still dead. And don't think because I handed in my badge, I can't see you evading my questions."

"Well, I told Ryan. He hadn't left the precinct in thirty-eight hours, just by the by. You should call him," Cassie informed Kate.

Kate responded with a grateful smile. She knew she had to talk to Ryan, but she was relieved her sister had given her a small window to collect her emotions before she did it. "You're still avoiding the question."

Cassie sighed heavily. This was going out at some point. She may as well get it over and done with. "Please don't make a big deal out of this?" She begged. Kate shrugged, moving over to the oven to check on whatever was in there.

"I went and saw Dad."

Shock visibly ran through Kate's body. "You did?"

"Yeah, it was time."

"How did it go?"

Cassie pondered the question, fiddling with the fruit bowl on the breakfast bar. "Okay, I guess. We're going to meet up for coffee some time next week."

"Did you see the wall?" Kate asked.

Cassie gave a low chuckle. "Yeah, I did. I was not ready for that, let me tell you."

"Dad was probably better informed of where you were than I was, even if I was the one you were actually talking to. He stalked your blogs."

"I got that," Cassie answered. She watched Kate crack the oven open.

"What are you doing? Trying to kill this entire family?" Cassie asked.

"I _can_ cook. I choose not to," Kate defended herself. "And nachos. Apparently we're invited to a Castle movie day."

"_We_ are?" Cassie echoed.

"I told you. This family is up for adopting a couple of stray sisters."

Cassie felt warmth spread throughout her body. She cracked a grin. "Sounds good to me. But for sobbing out loud, Katie, let me handle the guacamole. We do _not_ want a repeat of your Superbowl party in '06."

* * *

"So, we have a short list of movies," Alexis announced, gesturing to the pile of DVDs on the coffee table.

"I'm not fussy," Cassie decided, after inspecting the stack. Kate just shrugged. The reaction from the Castles was amusing. Alexis seemed to shudder, and Castle's eyes lit up.

"Eeeexcellent," he cackled, in a slightly creepy imitation of a B grade horror villain. Within minutes, he had _Monsters Inc._ in the Blu-ray player, and he proceeded to sit and quote the occasional line along with the movie.

Cassie looked up from her spot on the floor at her sister. Castle genuinely seemed traumatised by the argument between Mike and Sully in Nepal. Kate rolled her eyes, and attempted to look put out by the man child who had his arm slung around her shoulder, biting his fist as Sully attempted to find the right door to get back to Boo. Cassie could see straight through her sister's attempts at being serious. She was practically vibrating with happiness.

Kate looked down at Cassie as the movie finished. "I think it's time that we school these Castles in how to quote a movie," Kate declared.

"My dear sister, I thought you'd never suggest it," Cassie replied gallantly, standing up to change the movie. She accepted Kate's high five as the opening strains of _10 Things I Hate About You_ began to play.

Then they proceeded to quote every. Single. Line.

"There's a difference between like and love. I like my Sketchers, but I love my Prada backpack," Cassie sighed dreamily.

"But, I love my Sketchers?" Kate responded immediately, in tune with the movie.

"That's because you don't have a Prada backpack," Cassie answered helpfully.

"Oh," Kate intoned, her hand reaching out lazily to weave into Cassie's hair.

Cassie had to hide her smile when she saw Kate murmuring along with Kat's sonnet, her lips near Castle's ear.

Alexis stood and stopped the movie after the bloopers played. "How do you guys do that?" She wondered.

Cassie shrugged. "This was Katie's favourite when she was younger. We used to watch it all the time."

"I liked the main character," Kate defended lightly.

"Yeah, and you totally made me be the annoying little sister," Cassie whined.

"Clearly, not a lot has changed."

Cassie flipped Kate the bird. "Lex, pick the next movie," she ordered. "My nails are starting to gross me out something severe. You want a mani?" She asked.

Alexis shrugged. "Sounds good to me."

"Cool. Come with me for a sec?" Cassie dragged Alexis from the room.

"I think it might be safe to say that Operation Caskett was a success?" Alexis whispered when they hit the kitchen.

"We rule the world. We should have our own reality TV show."

"I like the sound of that," Alexis agreed. She pulled out a bowl and filled it with hot water, before dashing upstairs and grabbing a towel.

"We are coming in!" Cassie announced gallantly before entering the room. She set down her manicure kit on the coffee table, before gesturing for Alexis to sit with her hands in the warm water.

"'Bout time," Castle muttered, before pressing play on Alexis's choice of movie- _Remember the Titans_. Cassie barely watched the movie, her attention drawn by painting tiny black and white polka dots on Alexis's nails.

"Katya, vasha ocheredʹ. Speshite i sestʹ," (Katya, it's your turn. Hurry up and sit down) Cassie ordered as she returned to the room with a fresh bowl of water. Cassie steadfastly bit her lip as she worked on Kate's hands, ignoring the scrapes and broken nails (and the one busted knuckle), Kate's war wounds from the roof. She painted Kate's now short, neat nails with a heavy purple glitter, hoping to cover up some of the bruising from hanging off the ledge.

Kate settled back on the couch, careful of her fresh manicure.

Cassie raised an eyebrow at Castle. "Are you seriously pouting at me right now?" She asked as she sat back down on the floor to do her own nails.

"Are you really going to leave me out?" He asked indignantly.

"You really want a manicure?"

Castle wiggled his fingers. "These babies are the money-makers. I have to look after them."

Cassie shot Kate a look. Kate only rolled her eyes and blew gently on her nails.

"Alrighty then, Writer Boy. Get your ass down here," Cassie invited him.

He was actually surprisingly well behaved. Cassie quickly exfoliated his hands, before filing his nails down and working on his cuticles. Just to push her luck, she picked up a bottle of strengthener. She was millimetres from beginning to paint his nails when she heard Kate growl out an admonishment in Russian. Cassie pouted, but dutifully capped the polish.

"You're done, Writer Boy," Cassie proclaimed, nudging his shoulder.

* * *

Cassie shifted slightly in her position (she was seated on an armchair, her legs draped over Alexis's shoulders so Alexis could paint her toenails and still see the TV screen). She spotted the way that her sister and Castle were wrapped around each other as the credits rolled. It was time to move.

"Ok, decision made. Lex, go pack a bag. You're staying at my place tonight," Cassie announced. She moved her legs off of Alexis's shoulders and hustled her up to her room.

* * *

Cassie unlocked the door to the apartment. She rushed in and quickly forced the doors of the open shutters on the window closed, before Alexis could see them.

"Welcome to Casa Cassie y Kate. Feel free to dump your shit anywhere, and you can thank me anytime for saving you from the trauma of your Dad's shiny new sex life," Cassie pronounced gallantly, waving a hand to gesture around the living room.

"I love that everyone just assumes I'm completely naïve about what happens when a guy and a girl love each other very much," Alexis's tone was just a little bit saucy as she placed her bag neatly in a corner. "Believe it or not, I have actually been a willing and active participant in sex."

Cassie couldn't help her loud gasp. "Dios mio!" She exclaimed melodramatically. "It's always the quiet ones!" Cassie teased, coming over to poke Alexis in the ribs as she flushed scarlet.

"Just so you know, this is usually the point where I would ply you with cheap liquor to get you to tell me everything," Cassie informed her bluntly. Cassie cut off Alexis's protest. "However, I'm laying off the hard stuff for a little while, so I'll whip you up a virgin daiquiri and you'll just have to spill your guts without Dutch courage."

* * *

Alexis took a sip of the fruity drink Cassie placed in front of her.

"I don't know if Kate has told you anything about Ashley," Alexis started. She stirred the drink with her straw. "But he was my first love. He was super smart, a sweetheart and he was gorgeous. Everything a girl wants her first love to be," Alexis's face was fond at the memory.

"He was the year above me at school, and he got into Stanford. I'd been thinking about it for a while, and the weekend before he left, I figured, why not?" Alexis recalled.

"He was my first love, and I wanted him to have something from me I could never take back. And it was wonderful," Alexis flushed, and ducked her head.

"I got hell bent on getting into Stanford after that. I applied for early admissions, and got rejected. I was so crazy in love with this guy that I had to be with him, no matter what."

"So what happened?" Cassie asked.

Alexis sipped at her mocktail. "We grew apart. We live on opposite sides of the country, and our priorities are different. I broke it off with him a couple of months back," Alexis paused. "I don't regret it. Even if we weren't meant to be, I'm still glad I got to share that with him," She shot Cassie a bashful grin. "What about you?"

"My first time, or my first love? Because they're _not _the same thing."

Alexis shrugged. "Either. Both. You choose."

Cassie took a long sip of her drink. "I was thirteen," Cassie began. "My grandmother had just died, Kate was buried in Mom's case, and Dad's drinking… Well, it was pretty bad," Cassie cleared her throat at the forming knot.

"Ivan was a friend of the family. He was older, and he was _so_ cute, and he knew it. I don't know what it was that made him pick me, but he latched on, and he was determined," Cassie bit her lip, wondering how to phrase the rest of the story.

"I was such a mess. I didn't have my Mom, and I so needed her. I was terrified of my Dad, and when Babushka passed, I didn't have anywhere to hide from him. As much as I loved Kate, she wasn't really there for me. On top of that, I was SO insecure about how I looked. I stood head and shoulders above everybody else. I was like a baby horse, all long arms and legs, and my body didn't fit them. I had acne, I was gangly, and nobody knew how to be friends with the girl with the poor dead Mom. Kate was the only person I knew who could tell me anything about being a woman, and as much as I loved her, I was so intimidated by her,"

Cassie rolled her eyes at the memory. "I was this baby giraffe, all knobby knees and too-long arms, and I didn't have a clue of how to dress for my shape, so I looked like a teenage boy. Then there was Kate. And let's face it," Cassie gave Alexis an exaggerated wink, "My sister is gorgeous, and that intimidated the hell out of me. And she wasn't exactly in a healthy frame of mind, so it isn't like she was around to take me shopping for a training bra and explain why toner should be a daily part of my beauty regime."

Cassie took a sip from her drink. "Ivan paid me some attention. I was so lonely, and he made me feel special. And he told me that if I loved him, because, of course, a thirteen year old knows what love is, that I would do it. Then he started pressuring me. And then one day, I gave in. I thought if I had sex with him, he would love me the way I wanted to be loved," Cassie's throat became uncomfortably tight at the memory. "He didn't. He got what he wanted, and then he dumped me a week and a half later. On Mother's Day," Cassie appreciated Alexis's look of shock. "Then I found out he'd done the same thing to three other girls at the same time he dated me. By the time that happened, I'd transferred to York, found a pair of jeans that didn't leave my ankles sticking out at the bottom, and started using Pro Activ for my skin, but he'd still done a number on my self-esteem," Cassie finished her story, tipping her glass towards Alexis.

"What about your first love?" Alexis asked.

Cassie knew the question had been coming, but it didn't mean she was ready for it. She stared at her half empty (or was it half full?) glass, and she wished that it contained rum (and immediately regretted the thought, because she did NOT rely on alcohol for bravery or for avoiding her problems. She was _not_ an addict). "I finished up my year au pairing in England, and I wasn't sure that I wanted to come back to the US. There was an Aussie girl a couple of doors down who did the same job as me, and she told me about how her best friend had gotten a job dancing at the Moulin Rouge, so she was moving to Montmartre, and needed roommates. It seemed like as good an offer as any," Cassie shrugged, before moving to the pantry and seeing what snacks she had hidden away.

"So, I move to Paris. I'm working behind the bar at Sully's, and loving it. I had this whole motley crew of friends, some who were local, and some from all over the globe. It was great," Cassie sat back down at the table, plunking down a packet of Oreos. She might be avoiding alcohol like the plague, but she could certainly eat her feelings.

"I met Jacqueline through one of the locals. She was a student at the Paris Opera Ballet School, and she was unlike anybody I have ever met. She was passionate beyond all belief, and I'm pretty sure I fell in love with her the second I saw her," Cassie twisted open an Oreo and licked at the frosting.

"Our relationship was basically a combination of a lot of really good sex, and letting the good times roll. We were just going where the wind took us," Cassie mused.

"Until we weren't. Jacqueline and I had been talking about going on a Roman holiday. Just Italia, a Vespa, and us. She knew how much I wanted to see all Europe had to offer, and she was ready to come along with me for the ride."

Cassie blinked at the stray tear threatening to fall down her cheek. "Then she got an offer to dance with the Paris Opera Ballet. They're in the top five ballet companies in the world. It was an offer she couldn't refuse. And she didn't."

Alexis reached out and squeezed her hand. "So she picked dancing over you?" She asked.

Cassie gave her a small smile. "Not exactly. She asked me to stay."

"Stay?"

"In Paris. She would go on tour from time to time, and I could travel with her then and see the world that way," Cassie explained.

"And?"

"And I freaked. There was no _way_ I was going to let myself get tied down to somebody. Now I realise that it wasn't about being tied down. It was about being too scared to have somebody, in case somehow, someday, I lost her. I ran away to the South of France, and she stayed and danced. These days, I hear she's a prima ballerina," Cassie finished her story, and promptly drained her glass.

Alexis wrapped an arm around Cassie's shoulder, giving her a gentle squeeze. "You wanna play your music really loud and annoy the whole building?" Alexis asked.

* * *

**So, clearly, I'm moving into some VERY unchartered waters... but I'm having fun doing it**

**My one shot for 150 reviews should be up soon :)**

**I would really love to hear what you guys think of this... so drop me a review, hit up my ask box, or even tweet me :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**People had some really interesting reactions to the last chapter. However, I can very safely say that at no point will Cassie and Alexis be getting together. **

**I'm really appreciating all the support that I'm getting... but I certainly wouldn't say no to more! Please, just drop me a line and tell me what you think... I promise I don't bite!**

**As usual, thanks to Tad for her amazingly fast turnover with this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own. Like, c'mon guys... It's just getting mean now**

* * *

Clearly, Kate hadn't done the walk of shame in quite some time.

"You know, if you want to get in undetected, it usually helps if you take your shoes off," Cassie supplied helpfully. She licked the spoon she'd just pulled out of her coffee cup. "Nice to know you still remember where the apartment is."

"Shut your mouth, Cassandra," Kate retorted, the bite of her words completely undermined by the grin spread across her face.

"Looks like somebody has had a good couple of days. Back at sunset, before you turn into a pumpkin, I assume?"

"Oh, you have no idea," Kate replied with a quirk of her eyebrow as she poured herself a mug of coffee.

"So… you quit your job," Cassie stated bluntly.

"I quit my job," Kate echoed, coming to sit with Cassie at the dining table.

"Are you freaking out yet?"

"Why would I be freaking out?"

"Well, 1) You've had a job every single day of your life since you were sixteen, 2) by quitting your job you've essentially thrown away a thirteen year old vendetta, and 3) are you even qualified to work outside the police force? Need I continue?" Cassie drawled, ticking the items on her list off with her fingers.

"I don't know. I have no idea anymore, Cass. But I feel free," Kate replied. "Free like I haven't felt since I was eighteen years old. I don't know what comes next, and I don't care. I don't _care_, Cassie. Me. Kate Beckett doesn't care about the great big black hole hanging over her future."

"So you don't regret quitting?" Cassie asked.

Kate paused, stirring her coffee with a pensive expression. "Quitting my job was the only way I knew how to quit Mom's case. If I can ever figure out how to be a cop without touching Mom's case, then maybe I could go back. But until I figure out how to be at peace with Mom's killer never being brought to justice, I can't be a cop. The temptation is just too great, and I've finally got my priorities straight. I'm done putting my life on hold for justice, and if I can only have justice or have a full life, then I choose life. I choose to live the way Mom wanted me to," Kate tilted her head slightly, eyeing Cassie carefully. "Why?" She asked, slightly suspicious.

"Victoria Gates called the other day," Cassie admitted.

"Once she was satisfied that you were alive and reasonably healthy, she asked me if I thought you'd want to come back?" Cassie started to fidget with her coffee mug.

"I figured you probably wouldn't even consider going back because of the Mom thing, " Cassie told her gently. "I figured this might help." Cassie left the room, and returned carrying a brown cardboard box. Kate gave Cassie a dubious look, but cracked the lid hesitantly.

"What is this?" Kate asked, slamming the lid down on the documents inside.

"That's everything you had on the damn board. Plus some other stuff that shouldn't be lying around the house," Cassie replied. "I couldn't handle having Mom's case up on the wall. The thought made me sick, but I know this is something you need to deal with. Come with me," Cassie ordered.

* * *

Cassie led Kate to the roof of the apartment building. She set the box next to the large metal drum (once the belly of a washing machine) that had been smuggled up by the dreadlocked couple in 8C for rooftop parties in the fall.

"I was thinking about it the other day," Cassie told Kate as she dumped the box onto the concrete "We both have these crutches. Stuff that we've just allowed to become a part of our lives, and all they do is hold us back. Mom wanted us to have these awesome lives, and we can't have them because we're holding onto shit instead of ditching it for the gold that we really want. I'm not saying we forget our mistakes, but I do think we need to stop punishing ourselves with them. It's time that we clean the slate." With that explanation, Cassie pulled a Zippo lighter from her pocket. Hearing no protest from Kate, she flicked the lighter, and held the flame to the wadded up newspaper she'd tucked into the drum.

They watched, as the flame grew brighter, licking its way across the crumpled pages of the _Ledger_. Cassie rooted around in the box that she'd carried up. She unsheathed the foil tray of painkillers, dropping the box into the growing fire. She stared at the pills, memories of what had driven her to take them fluttering through her mind. Slowly and deliberately, Cassie popped each pill from the tray into the fire, a sense of satisfaction blooming in her chest when she saw each pill swallowed up by the flame.

Cassie turned to face her sister. "Ball's in your court, Katya," she invited.

Kate was motionless, her arms locked at her sides, knuckles turning white as she balled her hands into fists. She couldn't wrap her mind around her hesitance. She'd given up the case. Her crusade for justice was meaningless if it meant she ended up six feet under. Kate finally had everything she wanted. The box at her feet was the one thing that had the power to change that. If she didn't destroy everything in that box, everything that was worth anything to her could be ripped away in a heartbeat. Even having let her quest go, Kate would be forced to live with an ear to the ground, just in case a few scraps of leftover evidence was enough to have the Dragon put a price on her head.

If she truly wanted to be free of the case, then she had to rid herself of any tangible connection to it. Otherwise she'd live in silent fear that Pandora's Box would keep calling to her, and one day, the temptation to open the box and nail the bastard to a wall would be too great.

This ended now.

Kate tore the lid off the box. She didn't spare the evidence a second glance. She picked up the stack of papers, and dumped them unceremoniously into heart of the fire.

"Watch out," Cassie warned, bending over the box. She silently uncapped the bottle of cheap vodka that had been her partner that night, and emptied it into the fire, gasping as the flames jumped higher, eating the last of the Beckett vices along with it.

Cassie turned to Kate. "I want you to look after my passport."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, clearly we've established that when life gets tough, I run hard and fast in the opposite direction," Cassie explained. "Actually burning my passport would be a really stupid thing to do, but at least this way if I want to run away from my problems to India or something, I'll have to go through you, and I trust you to knock some sense into my hard head."

"Done," Kate agreed. She slung an arm around her sister, resting her head on her shoulder. They stood silently, watching until the last embers of their bonfire burnt out against the New York skyline.

* * *

"I think you could do it," Cassie whispered as she rolled onto her stomach and pressed her face into one of Kate's pillows as she sprawled diagonally across the bed.

"Do what?"

"Be a cop, without getting suckered into Mom's case," Cassie answered. "From what I hear, you're pretty fucking extraordinary. And you get it, Kate. You've been there, and you know what its like for those families that have been left behind. I know you say that you became a cop to get justice for Mom, but don't pretend," Cassie wrinkled her nose at Kate before continuing. "You became a cop because you didn't want anybody to suffer like we did. You wanted to be the cop that did their job like it was a damn mission from God. And even though we may never have that door shut on why we lost her, you can give it to other people. And you DO give it to other people," Cassie sighed, and rolled onto her back.

"You've always been empathetic, Kate. You've always known right from wrong, and you've stood up for it, even if it meant standing alone. I wish I could do what you spent thirteen years doing. When Gates called, she told me that if you go through with the resignation, New York was losing one of the best cops they've ever had. Not just from this generation. One of the best cops they've _ever_ had."

Kate came and sat on the end of the bed, back propped against the bed end. "And what if, one day, the temptation becomes too much? I get one lead, and I get sucked down that rabbit hole again. I've nearly died for this case, twice, and I've lost nearly everybody that I care about along the way. I don't have it in me to go down that path again."

"Isn't that what will make it different this time?" Cassie asked. Kate drew her knees up to her chest and gestured for her sister to continue.

"You've been in therapy since the shooting, right?" Cassie asked. Kate nodded.

"And all that time, you've been trying to make yourself better. Make the wall come down,"

"You know all of this, Cassie,"

"But you couldn't do it. You couldn't do it, because at the back of your mind, that murder board was still hidden behind the shutters. There was that little voice inside your head that whispered that if you got half a chance, you were going to take the bastard down, come hell or high water."

"Cass, where are you going with this?"

"The murder board is gone now. Any physical piece of evidence tying you to this case is in a pile of ash up on the roof. You decided that there was something more important. That you wanted Castle. Heck, that you wanted to be around for me. You _decided _that Kate. And that is what would stop you from going down the rabbit hole. You decided that something else was more important than vengeance. I think you can do it, Kate," Cassie nudged Kate's knee. "I think you can fight for the justice that we were denied, and know that it's okay to not be a superhero about it."

"Everything is so good now. It's so good. I don't know if I can bring myself to spoil it," Kate admitted.

"Kate, you can't live your life wrapped in cotton wool. Live bravely. If that bravery means you stay a cop, then do that to the best of your ability. If it means you do something completely different, then that's okay too. But don't let the rest of your life be dictated by something you're scared of possibly doing somewhere down the track."

"How did you get so smart?" Kate asked.

Cassie rolled onto her back and fluffed her pillow. "I've always been this smart. You just don't listen."

* * *

Cassie yawned as she unlocked the front door of the apartment to scoop up the morning paper. She smiled gratefully at Kate when she plunked a cup of coffee in front of her. Wordlessly, Cassie handed over the sports section and the headlining news to Kate. She flipped open the Arts section of the New York Times as her toast popped. Cassie stood and moved to the toaster, ignoring Kate's look of disdain as she smothered her toast with a healthy serving of Vegemite and avocado.

"Cassie, that is disgusting," Kate griped.

"I'm not asking you to eat it," Cassie responded glibly through a mouthful of toast. She picked up the paper and promptly choked on the food in her mouth. She coughed violently, and shot Kate a grateful grin when she placed a glass of water on the table.

"You okay?" Kate asked, hand on Cassie's shoulder blade.

"Fine," Cassie wheezed, her eyes watery. She pointed to the newspaper. "The Paris Opera Ballet is coming to New York," She explained.

Kate leant down to read the article, "_Returning to New York City for a four week run is the Paris Opera Ballet, fresh from a triumphant tour of Europe. Inspired by the critical success of Aronofsky's _The Black Swan_, principle dancer Jacqueline Prideux suggests that the POB's reinterpretation of the Tchaikovsky classic is far more organic and sexually charged than traditional imaginings of the ballet, with an increased focus on the struggle between love and lust within the piece…_ Cassie, is this…"

"The same Jacqueline I had a short and passionate affair with? The one and same," Cassie supplied tightly, her grip on the coffee mug tight enough that she was risking shattering the ceramic.

"And you're freaking out?"

"Just a little, yeah."

"New York is a huge city. What are the chances that you'll actually bump into her?" Kate said reassuringly.

"Right. You're totally right," Cassie replied, eyes clenched shut like she was trying to convince herself it was true. Cassie looked up at the clock. "Shit! Kate, you need to get dressed!" Cassie ordered.

Kate raised an eyebrow. "What do you have planned now?" She asked dryly.

"Just get dressed. Everything is going to become clear momentarily."

* * *

By the time Kate trotted out of her bedroom, Cassie was entertaining Ryan in the living room.

"No, seriously, Cassie. What is going on?" Kate demanded.

Cassie smiled charmingly, as there was a knock on the door. She waltzed over to the entry; fishing her keys out of her pocket to open the multitude of locks Kate had put on the door.

"Javi, I'm so glad you're here. Come on in," Cassie invited. The second Esposito had stepped through the doorframe; Cassie slammed the door shut and flipped all the locks.

"Oh, hell no," Esposito growled when he saw Ryan sitting in the living room.

Cassie stepped into his path. "Oh hell yes," She shot Javi a glare, daring him to push her out of the way. "I'm staging an intervention," Cassie announced to the room. "Clearly, there are some unresolved issues here. You're not going anywhere until the three of you sort out your shit and share bromantic hugs. I'll be in my room," Cassie explained, side stepping Kate and moving toward her door.

"And what's going to stop us from leaving once you're in your bedroom?" Esposito challenged.

"You need keys to get out the door from the inside," Cassie opened her palms, showing both sets of house keys looped around her fingers. "Good luck breaking that sucker down. You know where to find me if you need me," She sang out cheerfully as she strode out of the room.

* * *

Esposito refused to sit down. Ryan looked like somebody had kicked his puppy. Kate could feel her blood pressure slowly rising past acceptable levels. The silence in the room was thick with tension. Kate felt awful. Her tunnel vision had hurt _so_ many people, and she'd never forgive herself if she'd damaged Ryan and Esposito's friendship beyond repair.

"I am so sorry," Kate breathed, finally daring to break the silence. "This is all my fault. I put my blinders on, and I didn't care who I dragged down with me. I know an apology isn't enough, but it's all I can give you. I am so sorry, both of you. I was supposed to be your leader, and all I did was drag you into my nightmare."

"You're not the rat, here, Beckett," Esposito rasped, his tone so sharp that it visibly cut Ryan down.

"Take that back," Kate ordered. "Javier, I'm not joking. You're way out of line."

Kate ran a hand through her hair, her elbow on her knee. "We were the rats. We acted contrary to due process, to the ideals we swore to protect when we took on the badge. If Ryan hadn't had the balls to break the code, I'd literally be a smear on the pavement," Kate offered Kevin a weak smile. "It takes a huge amount of courage to stand up to your enemies, but an even greater amount of courage to stand up to your friends. I'm so grateful that you could be brave when I was so weak. I was scared of who I was without the case, and I let it blind me."

Kate turned to Esposito. "And I'm sorry I dragged you down with me. I took advantage of your loyalty. You have always had my back, no matter what, and I used that for my own advantage. That was wrong. It was so wrong. You might have had my back, but I didn't have yours."

"Of course I had your back, Beckett. What's a man got if he doesn't have honour?" Kate could see that Esposito wasn't going to be easily swayed on this.

"Do you really think we were honourable? We used the privilege the badge gives us to act like we were above the law. If we had succeeded in nailing Maddox, would the charges have even stood up in court? Honour is a good and noble thing, I agree with you, and Javi, you're one of the most honourable men I know. But honour is not being pigheaded. Honour is not belittling your brother because he was brave enough to act when we were in over our heads," Kate bit her lip.

"If anybody doesn't have honour here, it's me. So stop punishing him. Kevin is your _brother_, Javi, and he saved both of our asses."

"I'd do it again," Ryan said his first words quietly. "If I could go back in time, and do things over, I would do it again." He ignored the dark look he received from Esposito.

"You hate me right now. I get it. I broke the code. But at least you're alive to hate me. At least breaking the code means I don't have to face your family, and explain to them that because I wasn't man enough to stop you from charging head on at an impossible situation, and because of that, they get to put you in a hole in the ground and get nothing but an American flag for their trouble," Ryan said honestly. "And frankly, I'd rather lose your friendship and have you alive and hating me, than having to hate myself for letting you die."

"Beckett, you quit."

Kate smiled at the crestfallen expression on Esposito's face. "Not because of anything either of you did. And not because of the suspension."

Kate moved to sit on the arm of her sofa, balanced between her two former teammates. "I've been Kate Beckett: super detective, for thirteen years now. I've been completely defined by my job. I don't know who I am without that badge. I've hidden behind the job, and I've missed out on so much. I'm tired of missing out," she reached out to squeeze both of their shoulders. "So if you think I quit because of you two, I'm sorry, but neither of you are that special," she got a gruff chuckle out of them at her attempt to use cop humour to lighten the situation. "I quit because I'm sick of missing out on life because I've been too busy being trapped in a dead end case. Do not make me kick both of your asses for being stubborn. You guys need to start talking to each other… Unless you want Karpowski's team to overtake you for solve rates."

Kate stood and walked over to the other side of the room. There was nothing else she could do. It was up to the two of them now.

Esposito reached out a hand to Ryan. Ryan accepted it silently. In that typically male way, they needed no words to heal the rift between them.

Kate walked over to Cassie's door and tapped lightly. "You can let us out, now."

* * *

**So... there was no Castle in this chapter. However, I did feel like it was really important to start facing down some of the issues that the finale left us with. I don't know about you guys, but Rysposito breaking up was freaking heart crushing. Not kidding, I don't think I've ever been in that sort of emotional pain before.**

**So please... Use the review box. Rant at me for the lack of Castle. I don't mind :) just tell me what you think!**

**Reviewers also get cotton candy :)**


	15. Chapter 15

**Wow, chapter 15. Feels like such a milestone. In other exciting news, I bought myself a whiteboard, and used it to plan out the rest of the story. We're looking at 20 chapters, even guys :)... Which means we are officially on the downward slope.**

**Many thanks to Juliettaah for her wonderful French translations, and of course, thanks to Tad for her beta-ing work.**

**Disclaimer: If I was one of the Castle writers, I would have leaked promo shoots already. And I wouldn't let the cast tease the fangirls**

* * *

Cassie was just beginning to blow dry her hair after a session of Bikram yoga when her phone rang.

"Martha, my darling, my angel, my sweet. What can I do you for?" Cassie answered extravagantly.

"Get dressed, kiddo. We're going to the ballet," Martha announced down the phone. "Car will be there to get you and your sister in two hours."

Cassie wandered out of the bathroom into Kate's bedroom, where Kate was flipping through a selection of dresses.

"We're going to the ballet?" Cassie asked.

"We are," Kate answered innocently, holding up a dress against her figure.

"Why do I suspect you had something to do with this?" Cassie demanded.

"It's the gala. Dress appropriately," Kate replied.

Cassie flopped down on Kate's bed, heedless of the water dripping from her hair onto the comforter.

"I don't have anything to wear," Cassie complained.

"Nice try, Cass. Go check your closet."

* * *

Cassie pinned the last of Kate's hair into its elegant twist. "So, let me get this straight. You agreed to do this? Go to a big fancy event where there are going to be cameras, and people will see you on Castle's arm?"

"Paula said it would be a good idea. And besides, I'd rather have the media find out on my terms than having a covert shot wind up on Page Six."

"When are you going to tell Castle you're willing to marry him?" Cassie asked.

Kate blushed. "Is it that obvious?" She asked. Cassie smirked.

"Don't deflect," Kate ordered in a singsong, realising what Cassie was trying to do. "I am the master of deflection. You will never distract me. I know you're freaking out about going to the ballet of all places."

"There is zero deflection going on here. Sure, Jacqueline will be there. But she's going to be up on the stage, and therefore, unaware of my existence," Cassie quipped. "In all seriousness though, Kate. Does he know?"

"Cass, you're going to have to give me some context to play with."

"Have you told him that this is it for you?" Cassie asked.

Kate sighed, before turning to Cassie, adjusting the strap on Cassie's white Grecian style dress. "In not so many words," she admitted.

"So that's a no to telling him?"

"What am I going to say? Get a ring, I'm ready?"

"If you have to, yes!" Cassie replied. "Kate, the guy would marry you in a heartbeat. He's holding back because he doesn't want to scare you."

"He's had two divorces. Don't I have the right to be a little scared?" Kate asked.

"A little scared, sure. But third time is the charm. Just, think about it Katie. If he asked, what would you do?"

Kate paused, drawing her lower lip between her teeth. "I don't think… I don't think I'd say no. I've wasted so much time already. I don't think I want to waste any more," She admitted.

"Wow, Katie. You're growing up so fast," Cassie teased.

* * *

"Well, isn't this fancy?" Cassie mused when the limousine pulled up in front of their building. She shot the driver a charming grin when he helped her into the car.

"Don't you look gorgeous, Lex?" Cassie complimented, eyeing Alexis's floor length deep green gown with an approving nod.

"Thank you, Cassie," Alexis replied modestly.

"And I look fabulous," Martha chipped in. "Champagne?"

"Don't mind if I do," Cassie accepted the glass. "And Martha, you always look fabulous. Totally goes without saying," Cassie added.

"Oh, I know," Martha responded, slightly facetiously. She handed glasses of champagne to both Kate and Rick. "Don't look so shaky, Kate darling. You're made of sterner stuff than this," Martha admonished her gently.

"Just a little nervous. First public outing and all," Kate replied, knuckles growing tight around Castle's hand. Kate relaxed slightly when she felt Rick's thumb brush soothingly across her knuckles, and he pressed a soft kiss to her temple.

"At least you're outing yourselves though?" Cassie pointed out.

"Of course. This is a good idea. I'm just a little jittery," Kate reassured the group.

"Well, then. I'm gonna go ahead and suggest that somebody should propose a toast," Cassie announced.

Rick nodded, "To new beginnings," he toasted.

"Za lyubov," (To love) Cassie added, as she tapped Kate's glass with hers.

"And to me not falling on my ass," Kate proposed jokingly.

* * *

The ballet had been extraordinary. Cassie had been unable to tear her eyes from the stage.

"So, that's it? Off we trot before midnight and we all turn into pumpkins, right?" Cassie hoped she didn't sound too enthusiastic.

"She's joking, right?" Martha deadpanned. Cassie shrugged, still mostly serious. "The party's barely started, kiddo. Down to the ballroom. There's many a dancer with a tush I want to squeeze." Martha looped an arm around Cassie and pulled her along to the stairs.

"She's joking about the dancers, right?" Cassie hissed urgently to Kate. Kate only shrugged demurely, the picture of calm as she linked arms with Castle.

"I hate you _so_ much right now," Cassie snarled under her breath, looking over her shoulder to glare at Kate.

* * *

In a word, the ballroom was dazzling. Cassie had no idea why Kate had been so nervous; she was working the room like a pro, and the elegant black dress she'd again pilfered from Cassie's wardrobe had caught the attention of many a wandering eye.

"What are you thinking about?" Alexis asked.

"Just that my Mom used to love these kinds of events. She would force my Dad into a monkey suit and she always used to let me watch her get ready," Cassie reminisced, observing the dance floor. The few couples already lining the floor looked like twirling jewels as they waltzed around the room.

"She used to maintain that it was in her Russian blood. Her great, great grandfather was an advisor to Tsar Nicholas. The balls he used to host at the Winter Palace in St. Petersburg are literally legendary," Cassie murmured. She could almost see her parents on the dance floor. Jim was actually an excellent dancer (and he'd taught both his daughters the basics of ballroom), and he would dance with Johanna at nights like these until the band threw them out.

"What happened to this legendary Cassie I've heard so much about? The one that is always the life of the party?" Kate teased when she and Castle returned to the table.

"I'm keeping her under lock and key. This is your big debut, Katyusha. I wouldn't want to steal your limelight," Cassie responded with a cheeky grin.

"You're so thoughtful," Kate drawled sarcastically.

Their banter was interrupted by Martha's triumphant return to the table. "Look alive, kids, I've brought somebody over that you simply have to meet!" Martha announced. Cassie felt her breath freeze in her chest. Alexis stood up abruptly, blocking Cassie from view.

"This is Jacqueline Prideux. She danced both Odette and Odile tonight. Darling, you were simply marvellous. This is my son, Richard Castle…"

"The mystery novelist?" Jacqueline interjected, her voice throaty.

"How did you know?" Martha asked.

"A friend once recommended his work to me," Jacqueline replied, her French accent thick with mischief. She ignored Castle's handshake, and instead greeted him in the traditional French fashion, pressing a kiss to both his cheeks.

Cassie forced herself to breathe. She could handle this. She could. She had to pull herself together before Martha finished introducing Alexis and Kate.

"And this is Kate's sister…"

"Cassandre?" Jacqueline gasped. Cassie could feel the eyeballs of every single member of her screwball family on her as she stood and smoothed her dress. She knew the white Grecian style dress was flattering, and Jacqueline's gaze was scorching on her. Cassie exchanged bises with her, forcing herself not to shiver as she inhaled Jacqueline's familiar smell (hairspray, tiger balm, cigarettes and just a whiff of baby powder and the lavender oil she used to dress the blisters on her toes).

"Am I missing something here? Do you two know each other?" Martha asked, shattering Cassie's illusion that there were only two people in the room.

"We were intimate friends when Cassandre lived in Paris," Jacqueline answered. Cassie noticed Jacqueline hadn't relinquished her grip on her hands from when they'd exchanged bises. She made no move to pull away.

"It's a wonder you never mentioned it," Martha commented.

"Comment vas-tu après toutes ces années ? Ca fait si longtemps !" (How have you been all these years? It's been so long!) Jacqueline asked as she pulled Cassie to sit at the table.

"Je vais bien. Je vais même très bien. J'ai vu le monde, et maintenant je suis de retour à la Grande Pomme,"(I've been well. I've been very well. I saw the world, and now I'm back in the Big Apple,) Cassie replied quietly. "Et toi? Tu n'as pas du tout changé!"(What about you? You haven't changed a bit!) It was true. Jacqueline had the same petite dancer's frame Cassie remembered. Her corn silk blonde hair hung in the same ringlets, and her impossibly big green eyes still glowed out of her porcelain face.

"Tu était très belle ce soir. Vraiment. Tu étais faite pour danser ce rôle,"(You were beautiful tonight. Truly. You were made to dance that part,) Cassie complimented earnestly.

"Et toi tu es belle maintenant."(You look beautiful now,) Jacqueline replied without guile. Cassie was right. Jacqueline hadn't changed a bit. She was still refreshingly honest, and she had that look in her eye. That slightly predatory look that Cassie had remembered from in her first weeks in Paris, when Jacqueline was making it clear she saw something she wanted.

"Merci." (Thank you,) Cassie answered modestly, letting her hair fall over her face to hide her blush. She searched her mind for a less loaded topic of conversation and drew a blank.

"Aren't you supposed to be mingling with New York's elite?" Cassie blurted out. Damnit. What was it about this girl that reduced her to a babbling schoolgirl with no filter to speak of?

"Je n'ai pas envie de me mêler à l'élite new-yorkaise," (I don't want to mingle with New York's elite,) Jacqueline pouted. She brushed a lock of Cassie's hair off her face. "J'ai envie de me mêler avec toi." (I want to mingle with you.)

Fuck. There was that blush again.

"Mais tu as raison je suppose. Cependant, si tu veux me voir à nouveau..."(But, I suppose, you're right. However, if you'd like to see me again…) Jacqueline trailed off.

Cassie knew this was a bad idea. She knew it. It didn't make it any less tempting. "Eh bien, je suis plutôt occupée avec le travail la plupart du temps, mais je suis sûre que l'on pourrait trouver un moyen de se voir avant que tu ne repartes pour ta prochaine destination exotique,"(Well, I tend to be pretty busy with work most days, but I'm sure we could probably find a way to see each other before you jetset to your next exotic location,) Cassie replied in a tone she desperately hoped sounded blasé and not at all clingy.

Jacqueline held up a thin tipped permanent marker she carried with her for signing programmes. She quickly grasped Cassie's arm, before scrawling her phone number on there in her elegant handwriting. She blew gently on the drying ink.

"Profite bien du reste de ta soirée,"(Enjoy the rest of your evening,) Jacqueline murmured in Cassie's ear, before striding away from the table without a backwards glance.

* * *

"So, that's the famous Jacqueline?" Kate asked as she pulled off her shoes after the gala.

"That's her," Cassie replied, flopping onto the couch.

"She's gorgeous."

"That she is," Cassie agreed.

"She totally still wants you," Kate added in a singsong tone.

"Do you really think?"

"Oh, Malenkaya, (Little One) she has got you _so _hot under the collar," Kate teased.

"I know," Cassie groaned. "Which is ridiculous," She added, covering her face with a pillow. "I haven't seen her in four years. How the hell is she getting under my skin so quickly?"

"Maybe because of how things ended?" Kate suggested hesitantly.

Cassie pulled the pillow off her face. "What do you mean?"

"Let's face it. You guys didn't exactly have a clean break up. There's still a ton of unresolved feelings there, for both of you. Maybe now is time to resolve them?"

Cassie sighed. "Maybe," she agreed. She wandered to her room and pulled out her iPad. She quickly logged onto the Internet, and with a few clicks, had placed a floral delivery order.

"You're sending her flowers?" Kate asked with a raised eyebrow.

"She's big into the language of flowers. She'll know what it means," Cassie replied. "What are you doing here anyway? I thought you'd be staying at Castle's?"

"Big therapy session tomorrow. I figure I should get a decent amount of sleep before the ass kicking that is probably going to unfold."

Cassie nodded. "Well, I'm doing cellar tomorrow morning, so I'll be up super early and I'll probably miss you. But good luck for therapy? Is that the right sentiment?"

"I suppose?" Kate wondered. She stood and pecked Cassie's cheek. "Good night, brat."

"Night," Cassie replied as she wandered off to her room.

* * *

Cassie fiddled with her keys, trying to unlock the back door to The Old Haunt. She was a little early, but sleep had been somewhat elusive. She figured the manual labour of cellar work was probably going to be best for her- she stood a small chance of actually managing to switch off her brain and ceasing her overanalysing of the Jacqueline situation. She pushed the door shut, locking it behind her.

Cassie groaned when she saw the cellar. Clearly, nobody had bothered to roll the empty kegs out of the cool room when they had changed them over to full ones. Awesome. The beer delivery was due in an hour, and they were going to have to roll out all the empty kegs before they could bring the new ones in. Cassie sighed, but quickly got to work. She was about halfway through the job when she heard a clattering upstairs. Steve, the guy she was doing cellar with, had probably forgotten to use the back door to get in, again. She sighed, and began to make her way up the stairs to find him.

"Steve, you know Annie doesn't want us using the front entry before opening time. She doesn't want the bums thinking they can get an early drink," Cassie called out from the top of the stairs.

It wasn't Steve. Actually, Cassie didn't recognise any of the guys at the bar. All she recognised was a searing pain in her skull, before everything went black.

* * *

Cassie groaned loudly. Her head was fucking _throbbing_. She opened her eyes, only to get stabbed in the eyeballs by the bright light in her room.

"Gde ya?" (Where am I?) Cassie groaned. She gingerly touched her head and found an egg-sized lump.

"Hey, Cassie. Glad to see you're in the land of the living," Castle whispered soothingly.

Cassie forced herself to think in English, instead of Russian. "Could you… turn it down?" She asked eventually, after mentally checking her grammar.

"What do you mean?"

"The bright. Turn it down," Cassie requested thickly. She groaned again when she heard the dragging of the curtain across the windowpane

"Voices inside," she mumbled.

"What?" Castle asked.

"Sorry. Russian thoughts, making them in English. Not working so good," Cassie admitted. "What happened?"

"Steve found you. The Old Haunt had been robbed. You were unconscious on the stairs to the cellar," Castle explained.

"Ahh. That explains the poundy poundy in my head," Cassie ground out. She forced her eyes open and looked up at Castle.

"You came to pretty quickly, from what Steve said. He called the paramedics. Once they got you in here, they ran a head CT and MRI, just to make sure you didn't have any skull trauma. Everything was clean. You've got a grade three concussion," Castle explained.

"Can we make the bed up?" Cassie asked.

"Of course," Castle agreed. He quickly adjusted the bed so that Cassie was propped in an upright position. "How are you feeling?" He questioned.

Cassie shrugged. She felt more than a little overwhelmed. "Gde Katya?" (Where's Katya?) She asked in small voice, trying not to burst into tears.

"Kate?" Castle confirmed. Cassie nodded, realising that Castle probably didn't have a clue what she had just said. "I called her as soon as I found out. Her phone was turned off, but I left a message with her therapist's office to get down here as soon as she could," Castle reassured her.

Cassie nodded; her eyes screwed shut so that she wouldn't cry. She hurt, and she wanted her Mom, or her big sister.

"Hey Cassie, you're ok. I know you're probably feeling a little out of it right now, but you'll be fine. They gave you sedatives for all the scans, and they said they might leave you feeling a little emotional," Castle soothed her gently.

That did it. Cassie burst into tears. "I really want Katie," She confessed through her sobs. She felt Castle put a gentle hand on her head, softly stroking the side that wasn't sporting a massive goose egg. She hissed when the door swung open, flooding the room with light.

"Oh, Cassie," Kate sighed. She rushed to the bedside. She gently rested her forehead against Cassie's, reaching out to dry her tears. She reached out to grab one of Cassie's hands, quietly soothing her in Russian.

"What happened?" Kate demanded, looking up at Castle. She listened silently as Castle recounted the story, her expression slowly darkening.

"Explains why Demming is hovering outside," Kate rumbled quietly. "He needs to get her statement."

There was a loud knock on the door. Cassie whimpered at the sound.

Detective Tom Demming stepped into the room. "Hey guys," he greeted, his voice much louder than the hushed whispers Kate and Castle had been using.

"Hi, Tom," Kate responded in a pointed whisper. She slipped her hand into Castle's, bringing their linked fingers to rest on her lap as she perched on the edge of the bed.

"Do you think we could get that statement now?" He asked, his voice getting a tiny bit softer.

"Katya, ya nichego ne pomnyu. Pochemu on govorit tak gromko?" (Katya, I don't remember anything. Why is he talking so loudly?) Cassie ground out from behind clenched teeth from her spot on the bed.

"Tom, back off. She's just come out from under sedation, and she's got a grade three concussion," Kate warned, feeling herself slip into Mama Bear mode when she realised how brash the detective was being regarding her little sister.

"Yavlyaet·sya li on bytʹ chlen potomu chto on prikladom bolʹno, brosili yego na Castle?" (Is he being a dick because he's butthurt you dumped him for Castle?) Cassie questioned from her bed when she made the connection with whom Demming was.

"Basically," Kate answered, rubbing her free hand gently over Cassie's thigh. "Tom, she can't remember anything. Give her a chance to fight off the concussion and then you can have your statement. If I have to, I'll take it and pass it on."

"One problem with that, Kate. The grapevine suggests you're no longer counted among New York's Finest," Demming sneered.

"Regardless, you're not getting your statement today. You have all of The Old Haunt's video footage, and I'm sure you've got plenty of leads from CSU. Go chase those up, and you'll get her statement later," Kate ordered, her tone like ice. "I'll get Ryan or Esposito to take her statement if I have to. Now back off. You're not going to get anything useful out of her today." Kate glared at her ex, daring him to challenge her.

Demming closed the door with a lot more force than was strictly necessary.

"Spasibo, Katie," (Thank you), Cassie rasped.

"No problem, honey," Kate replied. "There's no way you can give him anything of value right now. He was just throwing his weight around because he could," Kate explained.

"I'm glad you broke up with him Katie. He seems like a real jerk," Cassie mumbled.

The door swung open, much more softly this time. "How's our patient?" the doctor asked cheerfully.

"Golova patsienta vot-vot vzorvatʹsya chertovski," (The patient's head is about to fucking explode,) Cassie growled.

"She has a pretty bad headache," Kate interpreted helpfully, censoring Cassie's words as she saw fit.

"That's to be expected. That could possibly last a few days," the doctor explained.

"She'll need to be monitored for the first twenty four hours. She should be woken up every two hours that she sleeps, and ask her a few questions when you do. Try and keep her awake for fifteen minutes at a time. Keep that egg on her head iced, but she's going to have a nasty bruise. I'll write you a prescription for pain. After a couple of days, you may find they're too strong, but make sure you don't take aspirin or ibuprofen, because they may increase your symptoms," The doctor handed Kate a sheet of paper with instructions on it. "She starts displaying any of those symptoms, bring her straight back in."

Kate took the list and began examining it, committing every detail to memory.

"Other than that, Cassie is actually fine to go home. I'll have a nurse bring in her discharge papers."

* * *

Castle had insisted on calling his car service to take Cassie home. He'd also insisted to the company that he wanted heavily tinted windows. He was clear with the driver to take it slow, and avoid jostling the back seat at all costs. Cassie lay in the back with her head on Kate's lap, a light coat over her face to block out some of the blinding sun.

"Stay with us," Castle suggested quietly.

"I can't do that now," Kate replied, gesturing to Cassie.

"No, both of you. We can all look out for her. We'll take shifts in waking her up," He maintained.

"Castle, trust me, you don't want to do that. Cassie is the worst patient on the face of the earth."

"Cassie can hear you," Cassie interjected from underneath the jacket on her head.

"Kate, it's the least I can do. She got hurt at work," Castle implored.

"You are _not _responsible for what happened!" Kate snapped.

"Kate, please," Castle pleaded with her, turning on his puppy dog eyes.

"Fine," Kate relented. She rolled her eyes at Castle's grin when he leaned over to tell the driver to change directions.

* * *

They settled Cassie in the guest room of the loft to get some sleep.

"Thank God you were there with her," Kate sighed as she plopped down on the couch.

"I got a call from Steve about the break in, and I went down. He didn't even mention anything about Cassie until I got there. It was the least I could do," Rick replied.

Kate leaned her head on his shoulder, relishing in the fact that she could rely on him for comfort. "She's my baby sister, you know? I'm supposed to be the one protecting her, and I can't anymore."

"You did a pretty good job protecting her from Schlemming," Castle countered with a wry grin, wrapping an arm around Kate, and slowly running his fingers up and down the skin of her arm.

"But did I really? In a couple of days time, I'm going to have to take her down to the Precinct and he'll take her statement, and he's probably going to be an even bigger ass to her than he was before, just because I managed to show him up." Kate shuddered slightly. "I'll have to go back to the Precinct. I don't know if I want to go back there as a civilian. I don't know if I can take all those pitying stares."

Rick pressed a kiss to Kate's forehead. "I can take her if you want me to," he offered.

"Oh no, it's not that," Kate responded. She didn't quite know how to put her thoughts into words.

"Therapy was good, today," Kate offered, attempting to change the subject. She felt Rick pull her closer.

"Was it?" Rick asked. He was so grateful Kate was being open with him, and he didn't want to push her into closing up.

"Yeah. I think I might have had a breakthrough," She answered, her teeth coming to rest on her bottom lip. She looked up at him, eyes sparkling. In one smooth movement, she flipped a leg over Castle's frame and straddled his lap.

"I'm just… I'm just _so_ happy," she confessed, pressing her forehead to his. His hands slid to span her waist, and she wasted no time in kissing him, weaving her hands into his thick hair.

"I didn't think people like me ever got to be this happy," Kate confessed when she pulled away from Castle to breathe. She shivered when she felt Castle's lips trace the column of her throat.

"You deserve every kind of happiness that comes you way," He rasped against her skin. "And if I'm a part of that, then I'm a very, very lucky man."

"You know how I said I had a breakthrough?" Kate asked. Castle nodded against her neck.

"There's something I need to go do," She told him. Very reluctantly, she peeled herself from his lap, and stood.

"I'll be back in a couple of hours."

* * *

Kate strode into the office with complete confidence. "My requalification results," Kate announced, dropping the forms on Captain Gates' desk.

"Does this mean what I think it means?" The Captain asked, peering over her glasses.

"I have a few conditions," Kate added.

"I wasn't aware that detectives that had resigned from their jobs were in any position for conditions."

"I know how badly your solve rate has dropped," Kate responded. "I also know of four different private investigation agencies who would take me on in a heartbeat, and I'm sure Agent Jordan Shaw of the FBI could find me a place in her team."

"Talk to me about your conditions," Gates sighed.

"I get my full team back."

"Done."

Kate bit her lip, but barrelled on. "You see me go near anything that even closely resembles my Mom's case, you kick my ass out of this precinct so fast my back teeth rattle."

"That can happen. Anything else?"

"You seem me go off the rails again, you tell me?" Kate asked, terrified at being so vulnerable in front of her boss.

"Without question. Welcome back, Detective Beckett. I'll expect to see you next Monday," Captain Gates decided, handing Kate her badge before turning back to her paperwork.

"Oh, there's one more thing," Kate added, clipping her belt to her waist.

Gates raised an eyebrow.

"Castle comes back with me."

Gates sighed, "If he must," she responded, without tearing her eyes from her paperwork.

Kate strode out of the bullpen on cloud nine. She couldn't be absolutely certain, but she suspected that Gates had only resisted Castle's return out of principle.

She was back.

* * *

**The amount of feedback I received for the last chapter was absolutely mind blowing. Please, keep it up, because it makes me super happy. Cotton Candy is on the way for you all. :)... you should also be very happy I didn't end the chapter with Cassie getting knocked out, like I was tempted to *cue evil laugh***

**For those of you wondering, I imagine that Jacqueline looks like a blonde Emma Stone.**

**Reviewers will receive my eternal love...and also Nutella.**


	16. Chapter 16

**Here we go guys... this is a little bit long, but I couldn't find a nice place to split it. And I'm sure you're really upset about a long chapter.**

**Disclaimer: AM is not sitting at his kitchen table in his uni hoodie, eating nutella from the jar posting fanfic. Me on the other hand...**

* * *

Kate tapped out a text to Castle as she got off the elevator, asking him to have the door open. She stepped through to the quiet loft, and greeted him with a kiss.

"Hey," she whispered, unable to help the smile that spread across her lips. Just because she could, she kissed him again on an impulse.

"Missed you," he mumbled against her lips. Kate chuckled, and wrapped her arms around his neck, resting her head against his shoulder.

"How was your breakthrough?" Castle asked.

Kate nipped at his neck. "It was good," she answered, her lips brushing against the skin of his throat. She reached for one of his hands, and guided his fingers to press against the badge that still sat on her hip. "Breakthrough," she whispered.

She felt Castle stiffen in her embrace. "You're going back," he muttered. It wasn't a question.

"Yeah," she answered.

He pulled away and sat down on the couch, wiping a hand over his face. "I don't understand. I thought you quit?"

Kate perched on the arm of the sofa. "I quit my Mom's case," she clarified.

"Aren't they the same thing?" Castle asked.

"You're kidding, right?" Kate's tone was ice cold. "I seem to remember being quite a successful detective before somebody reopened the case," she snapped. The second she said those words; she wished she could take them back. Shit.

"I'm going to check on Cassie," she muttered, striding out of the room.

* * *

"Hey there, egghead," Kate greeted gently as she walked into the guest room. Cassie groaned softly in response.

"Is the ice helping?" Kate asked, coming to sit on the other half of the bed.

Cassie shrugged. "I guess," she answered. "I still have a small jackhammer going off in my head."

Kate looked over at Cassie's bedside table. Sitting next to the half drunk glass of orange juice were two of the pills Cassie had been prescribed for pain.

"Cass, you have to take the painkillers the doctor gave you," Kate implored.

Cassie shook her head. "No."

"Cassie…"

"Kate, _no!_" Cassie pressed her lips together to suppress the groan she wanted to let out at being so forceful.

"Cassie, you are not an addict. You are not Dad, and you are not using these pills to escape something. You are in pain, and your doctor prescribed you medication to alleviate that. I'm not going to sit here and let you be in pain if you don't have to be. So if you don't take them willingly, I am going to force them down your throat. Decide," Kate ordered. Cassie closed her eyes and crossed her arms across her chest.

"Cass," Kate started more gently. "Do you really think I'm going to let you go down that path? C'mon. Please, just take the pills. Don't make me watch you suffer like this," Kate begged.

"Don't guilt trip me. That isn't fair," Cassie whispered.

"And neither is your head pounding when it doesn't have to."

Cassie slowly turned her head and looked at Kate. "Don't let me be stupid," she begged. Kate nodded. Cassie sat up gingerly, and swallowed the tablets.

"Happy?" She asked, forcing a tiny bit of bravado back into her tone. She lay back down and gestured for Kate to join her.

Kate bit her lip, and moved her hand to the waistband of her jeans. She unclipped the badge, and put it in Cassie's hand.

"What the hell, Kate?" Cassie breathed.

"I'm going back," Kate finally said the words out loud. "As of Monday, I'm back to being Detective Kate Beckett of the NYPD."

"What brought this on?" Cassie asked carefully, hyper aware that their last discussion had focussed very heavily on Kate not going back.

"A few things," Kate replied. She chewed on her lip. "I think that you were right. I made a decision. I decided to let Mom's case go. I'm not throwing my life away anymore for something that I'm never going to get," She blinked hard, trying not to cry. "I'm good at what I do. I'm a _damn_ good detective. I'm not going to be selfish and hide from that because there's a chance I could go off the deep end."

"So then why do you sound so upset?"

Kate should have known Cassie would realise something was wrong, concussed and bruised as she was. "I don't think Castle's so happy that I'm going back."

"Ekaterina Natasha Beckett, Vy mozhete bytʹ boleznenno tolstymi inogda," (you can be painfully thick sometimes) Cassie groaned.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Kate asked, not nearly as offended as she sounded.

"It means that he loves you, you idiot. He's scared you're going to get hurt. Honestly Katie, did you even tell him you were going to do this?"

"I was going to…"

"And then, let me guess. You went off, half cocked, as usual, and made a decision that affects both your lives without considering how he might feel. Are you surprised he was upset?"

"I was going to talk to him about it."

Cassie scoffed, giving Kate a perfect impression of their mother's famous eye roll.

Kate poked her in the ribs. "I was! I left my therapy session ninety nine percent sure I was going to go back."

"What changed?"

Kate hesitated. "I couldn't protect you," she whispered. "Cassie, you're my baby sister. My job is to make sure that you're always okay. Random scum hurt you, and I couldn't even make sure that you weren't going to get pushed around by a cop on a power trip."

"Katie, no. Please don't make me the reason you're doing this," Cassie begged, hazelly-green eyes wide.

"Well you are. You, and people like you. I have to stand up for the little people, Cassie. I thought I was going to do it in a courtroom, like Mom did, but it turns out that my place in the world is behind a cop's badge. I can make a difference. I can be the cop who doesn't take no for an answer. This is who I'm supposed to be."

"So tell him that. He always knew there was a chance you were going to go back. You need to communicate Katie. Be a big girl and use your words."

"You're right," Kate sighed. She stood up, and plucked the badge out of Cassie's hands. "Are you going to be alright up here?"

"Me? Oh, I'm just fine. I'm feeling a little loopy, though. You go. I even have earplugs up here, so you can have really loud make up sex if you want. It's the best kind," Cassie answered. Clearly, the painkillers were loosening Cassie's already blunt tongue.

Kate shook her head, pressed a kiss to her sister's forehead, and trotted downstairs.

* * *

Kate had some apologising to do. She had some big, huge, apologising to do. She found Rick crouched over his desk, pounding away at his keyboard hard enough to do some serious damage to the wiring underneath.

"I shouldn't have said that to you. It was wrong. I'm so sorry," she breathed.

"But you're right. I dragged all this up. None of this would have happened if I hadn't stuck my nose where it didn't belong."

"And Cassie wouldn't be back in the US, she never would have made up with Dad, and we certainly wouldn't be doing this, either," Kate retorted. "None of that matters. What I did was wrong. I have no right to ever use that against you in an argument."

She watched Rick's frame slowly become less tense. She slowly approached him, waiting for him to lash out at her.

"I didn't think about how this would affect you. I didn't even think to talk to you at all. I ran away, like I always do, played my cards close to my chest, and I actually thought you'd be happy about this." She approached his desk, and put the badge down in front of him.

"I don't have to go back."

Rick's head popped up. He reached out for her. "But you're a cop."

"Yeah, I am," Kate agreed. She stepped forward and leaned against the desk, her legs twisted between his. "I'm a daughter, too. A big sister," she added. She cupped Rick's cheeks. "I'm also a girlfriend. And a pretty crappy one at that."

Rick pulled her forward to sit on his lap. "You are so incredibly frustrating, you know that?" He whispered, before pressing a scorching kiss to her lips. "I love you, Kate Beckett. I love you," he told her seriously, before pulling away slightly. "But I need to understand. How are you going to do this? How can you be there, and not get sucked into the rabbit hole I opened up?"

"It's different this time," Kate answered simply. "I chose you." She ran a hand through his hair before explaining further. "I've been in therapy for a year now, working and waiting for that wall to come down. But in the back of my mind, the case was still open. I never really let it go, and I had the DIY murder board to prove it," she paused for a moment, and squeezed his shoulder gently. He nodded, with her so far, and she continued.

"But when I was hanging from that roof, everything changed. I didn't want vengeance for my mother's murder. I didn't want to watch the light fade from somebody's eyes, and be justified that it was a tooth for a tooth. I wanted you. I just wanted _you._ I wanted to live, and be the person my mother raised. _You _are what is important here, not a dead end case." She paused, and pressed a hot kiss to his mouth.

"That is what makes it different. I have a support network. People who care too much about me to let me start down a path of self-destruction. People who would gladly kick my ass if I ever forget where my focus should be," she tilted her head, giving him a softer version of her Beckett glare (the one she used when she wanted to laugh but knew it would only encourage him) "I hope that I can count you at the top of that list?"

"Always," he replied sincerely, hand resting over her scar like it was some kind of vow.

"Good," she whispered, leaning forward to place leisurely kisses across his stubbled cheek. "I told Gates that I would only come back if you came with me," she mumbled in his ear, before teasing his earlobe with her tongue.

"I'm surprised she gave the badge back, then," he muttered.

"I have the distinct feeling that she might not hate you quite as much as she used to." Kate turned, and hit save on whatever it was that Rick was working on. She extracted herself from Rick's lap, and strode towards his bedroom, stripping off her shirt as she went.

"You comin', Castle?"

* * *

There was no way of getting around it. Cassie Beckett was stoned.

"Hiiiii Castle," she greeted cheerfully from her bed.

"You're in a good mood," he commented, handing her a fresh ice pack.

Cassie wrinkled her nose at the cold sensation on her forehead, but nodded cheerfully none the less. "I'm shiny," she announced. She held her phone up. "Jacqueline got my flowers. Which means she got my phone number. She's been texting me allllll afternoon," she gestured for Castle to move closer. "And, they're the fun kind of text messages. Not the kind that mean she's still mad I dumped her in Paris," she sighed happily and continued her rambling. "You met Jacqueline, right? She's nice," Cassie said dreamily.

Castle took a seat on the edge of her bed. "Don't go working that crush too hard, mei-mei. She's only in town a month," Castle reminded her. He couldn't shake the protective instinct he had for Kate's crazy little sister.

"You're nice too," Cassie added.

"No I'm not. I'm a mean old man."

"Nu-uh," Cassie argued, sticking her tongue out like the drug affected five-year-old she currently was.

She sighed heavily. "When are you going to ask my sister to marry you?"

"Excuse me?"

"She'd totally say yes, you know. You're her one and done."

"You're stoned, Cassie."

"That's how you know I'm honest. But seriously," Cassie looked at him, staring at him as intensely as she could manage with her glassy eyes, "She'd marry you in a heartbeat. That's why you should ask her," she wiggled her fingers helpfully, and pulled off a ring and handed it to him. "I have the same size fingers as her if you need a guideline."

"You need to rest, Cassie," Castle reminded her. "And you should probably stop sending people text messages when you're high as a kite," he added as he moved towards the door, slipping Cassie's ring into his pocket.

The only response Cassie gave was to blow a large raspberry.

* * *

"Alexis," Cassie called out from her bed. "Alexis!" she called again, louder.

"Yes, Cassie?" Alexis answered patiently, sticking her head into the guest room.

"I'm bored," Cassie whined.

"You should try and sleep," Alexis suggested.

"Nope, tried that. It'll put me all outta whack."

"Want to watch a movie?"

"Hurts my eyes."

"You've been texting just fine."

Cassie flushed. "Yeah, well, Jacqueline's off warming up now, so that option's off the table."

"Is that a good idea?" Alexis asked carefully as she plopped down on the bed.

"Texting Jacqueline? Why wouldn't it be?"

"Because you've already had your heart broken over this girl once," Alexis pointed out.

"I'm going to be fine," Cassie said dismissively.

"Cassie," Alexis hedged.

"It's ok. I know she's only here for a while. What's the harm in chatting with an old flame?"

"I just don't want you to get hurt," Alexis told her honestly.

"I'm already concussed. What else could possibly go wrong?"

"I'm not going to list worst case scenarios for you. I'm doing an internship at the morgue, remember?"

"I bet Chocolate Truffle is just disgusting right now. I could hear her squealing when Katie called her with the big news."

"She's pretty happy for them," Alexis agreed. "But I think she's even happier now. I caught her and Detective Esposito making out on one of the autopsy tables last Tuesday."

Cassie gasped. "Don't lie to me, Alexis. I've already lost it sobbing once today. I don't think I can cope with this kind of torture."

"I've been sworn to secrecy."

"Oh, Lexi, I'm so flattered! Breaking girlcode like that. And to me?" Clearly, Cassie was still a little bit affected by the pretty white pills the doctor had prescribed.

"I had to tell somebody. But you can't tell ANYONE, not even Kate. Lanie is crazy scary when she's mad."

"Your secret is safe with me," Cassie promised, leaning the not injured side of her head on Alexis's shoulder.

"I think I might have thought of something to do," Cassie announced. "Do you think you could get me some loose paper and a pencil?"

* * *

"Hey, Cass, dinner is nearly ready…" Kate trailed off when she entered the room. "What are these?" She asked, holding up a sheet of paper with a detailed sketch of a man's face on it.

Cassie shrugged. "I felt like drawing."

"Did you just make these faces up?" Kate asked.

"I don't know," Cassie replied, clenching her pencil between her teeth as she smudged a line on the page in front of her. "I can't be sure… but I feel like these might be the guys who broke into the Haunt."

"Are you serious?" Kate breathed.

Cassie shook her head, before tilting the page she was holding to inspect it. "Like I said, not sure, but I think it could be."

Kate inspected the sketches carefully. "These are _really _good, Cassie. They'll really help in the investigation."

"If I've got the right guys," Cassie reminded her. "I could've just made them up."

"If you're feeling up to it, I'll take you down to the Precinct tomorrow to make your statement, and you can show them to the guys there. Maybe something will pop." Kate paused. "Even if they're just drawings of random people on the street- they're amazing."

"Thank you." Cassie slowly stood up and moved towards the mirror. "Oh, that egg is not a good look," she grumbled, gingerly poking the violet lump on her forehead. "My nurse was apparently badass, though," She added as an afterthought. All of Cassie's piercings had to be removed for her scans, however, one of the nurses had been kind enough to replace the metal bars with the plastic studs that kids at private schools wore to hide their body art.

"Come on, Cass. Dinner's nearly ready."

* * *

Cassie was comfortably situated in the dimmed living room when Kate placed a bowl in front of her. She felt Kate's hand rest on her shoulder and give it an affectionate squeeze as she peered into the bowl.

Cassie immediately felt her eyes well up. "Damnit, Katya," she squeaked from behind the lump in her throat. She managed to get the bowl onto the coffee table that had been pushed closer to her before Kate swept her in a tight hug.

Kate ran her hand through Cassie's messy hair (now faded to pastel shades of blue and green) soothing her quietly as she perched on the arm of the reclining chair.

Cassie eventually pulled away, sweeping a hand across her tear streaked face. "You guys probably think I'm a freak," she muttered and cleared her throat.

"Our Mom used to make us these when we were sick as kids," Kate explained quietly to the assembled Rodgers/Castle clan.

"And apparently, the drugs they gave me make me super emotional," Cassie added. "Though, I can't exactly see Katie finding the time to make pelmeni."

Kate rolled her eyes. "I ordered in from Dyadya Yuri's café down in Brighton Beach," (Uncle Yuri) Kate informed her. Cassie smiled. Yuri and his wife Olena were no blood relation to the Becketts, (or the Volkovs- their grandparents), but Cassie had several very fond memories of eating slices of black bread with a thick slathering of butter with her cousins (blood related and otherwise) in that very café.

"So it's safe to eat, then?" Cassie teased. Kate shoved her shoulder lightly.

"I don't want to be rude… but what exactly are they?" Alexis asked.

"Pelmeni are basically dumplings. Inside you'll find meat and vegetables," Kate explained. "I ordered a couple of other things as well," she added, opening up the boxes and pointing out the Russian style fish and chicken she'd ordered, quickly instructing the Castles to add the side order of potatoes to the meat.

"So this is pretty typical Russian food?" Alexis asked as they ate dinner.

Kate nodded. "Our Grandmother would cook enough of this stuff to feed an army whenever we visited for a meal."

"I ate stuff pretty similar when I was living in Moscow," Cassie replied. "Russian food is basically a shit tonne of meat, and potatoes. There are also a few million different types of soup."

"So how does caviar come into this?" Alexis wondered with a wrinkled nose.

"Not in any of this," Kate answered.

"You have caviar on blini, which are basically mini pancakes," Cassie explained. "And blini were invented for when you drink vodka. Basically so you can line your stomach between shots."

"Really?" Rick asked.

"Trust me, you need it," Kate muttered darkly. "I learnt that the hard way my first night in Kiev."

* * *

Cassie retired to bed fairly quickly after dinner. As much as she enjoyed the weird way she and Kate had been adopted into the fold, her head was pounding, and she was exhausted. Kate had watched her take another dose of pain pills (much to Cassie's chagrin), and had lain with her, playing with her hair until she crashed.

Cassie groaned, as she was shaken awake. "Why do you hate me?" She grizzled as she forced her eyes open.

"Leave the melodrama to me, darling. Doesn't suit you at all," Martha announced. She handed Cassie a bottle of water and gestured for her to start drinking. Martha picked up the baggie of studs the hospital had given Cassie when she was discharged, and perched on the bed next to Cassie.

"Now, why exactly was I not informed about the sordid history between you and that lovely ballerina?" Martha questioned as she began to replace the studs in Cassie's ears.

"Well, it didn't exactly come up," Cassie attempted to defend herself. She hissed in pain as Martha replaced the bar that went through her tragus.

"No, of course not," Martha agreed. "Would you like to tell me the real reason now?"

Cassie sighed. "It sounds dumb."

"Try me, kiddo."

"I didn't want you to think less of me," Cassie confessed.

"Oh, darling." Cassie felt herself swept into Martha's familiar hug, the soothing smell of Chanel and mother enveloping her senses. "Don't ever feel that way," Martha hummed in her ear. Cassie didn't know what to do when she felt Martha's lips press against her crown. "Besides, darling, I'm an actress!"

"Meaning?"

"Meaning I had a sassy gay friend _long_ before they were considered an essential accessory."

* * *

Cassie appreciated the efforts everyone had put in for her. She really did. But she needed to leave the loft before she snapped and killed someone.

"Are you _sure_ you're ready to do this?" Kate asked Cassie for at least the twelfth time.

"Yes, Katie," Cassie answered emphatically. She tied a scarf in her hair, disguising the fading lump on head. "Katie, I gotta get out of this loft. I can't be cooped up like this. If that means I have to go give my statement, then bring it on."

"How's your head?" Kate asked.

"I have a headache, but nothing unbearable. The Tylenol just hasn't kicked in yet." Cassie turned to face Kate. "Kate, I promise you, I'm okay. I know you've got your big sister bear face on, and I appreciate it, but I'm perfectly fine. Break ins happen. I shouldn't have actually been at work that early, anyway. Don't stress about me," Cassie reassured Kate.

"As long as you're sure," Kate finally agreed, picking up her handbag as Cassie dragged her out of the door.

* * *

"It was cellar day. I was due to start at 8am, but I got to work a little early. I came through the back door, and went straight into the cellar," Cassie recalled.

"Do you remember exactly what time you got to the Old Haunt?" Detective Demming clarified.

"Not exactly. Around 7.30 I think? But I would have had to shut the alarm system off at the back door, so shouldn't you know?" Cassie asked. She surmised that the look she received from Demming meant that he was just trying to match her statement to his already established timeline. Beyond that, Cassie _knew _there was a security camera right near the back entry. "I remember I was pissed, because nobody had bothered to move the empty kegs outta the cool room. I was about halfway through moving them before the delivery arrived when I heard noise upstairs," Cassie paused, taking a sip out of the glass that had been placed in front of her.

"Steve is kinda dopey, so I figured he'd forgotten that Annie asked us to use the back entrance before opening hours."

"Any reason for that?"

Cassie frowned. "A drunk sees you open the front door, he assumes you're ready to serve him his liquid lunch. It saves the argument. It also looks a little more professional," Cassie replied, proud she hadn't tacked a "duh" on the end of her statement.

"So you heard noise upstairs, then what?"

"I started going up the stairs to the bar, and I called out to Steve…"

"And then?"

"And then black," Cassie answered with a shrug. "Next thing I know, I'm in a hospital bed at Lennox Hill wailing at my boss in a combination of English, Russian and sobbing."

Demming sighed. "Are you sure that you can't remember anything else?"

"_No_," Cassie replied emphatically.

"Seems convenient that you can't remember the part of the story when you actually see the bad guys." Demming tossed a collection of photographs on the desk, clearly pulled from the security footage at the Old Haunt. All the figures were wearing hoodies, faces obscured from view. "Do you recognise any of these guys?" He asked.

Cassie did not like what Demming was insinuating, but she leaned over and studied the photos none the less. "You're kidding, right?" She asked. "I can't see any of their faces." She reached into her bag and pulled out her collection of sketches. "I'm an artist, okay? Post bump on the head, I'm drawing, because well, what else can one do when concussed? These are the faces that came out," Cassie calmly explained. "Like I said, I don't remember much from the period surrounding my concussion; which any neurologist will tell you is perfectly normal," She added smarmily, "But I've never seen these guys before, so I have no reason to dream up their faces. Take that however you want."

Demming picked up her sketches and began to inspect them.

"Well, I think we're done here," Cassie announced, picking up her bag. When Demming didn't stop her from leaving the room, she rolled her eyes and stormed out.

"How'd you go?" Kate asked. She'd clearly been waiting right outside the room.

"It was fine," Cassie answered. "I'm so glad you chose Castle. He's way more fun."

Kate managed not to roll her eyes at Cassie's typical bluntness. "Yeah, I'm pretty happy with my choice as well," She agreed.

Cassie's phone buzzed, and she danced along with the tone indicating that she'd gotten a text message. She quickly read the text, and fished her sunglasses out of her handbag. "Well, my favourite big sister, I'm going to love you and leave you," Cassie announced.

"You do know I'm your only big sister, right?" Kate teased Cassie with a gentle tug of her hair as they walked towards the elevator.

"Doesn't mean you're not my favourite!"

Kate bit her lip. "Hey, Cass," she called out to her sister's retreating form.

"Yeah, Katie?"

"I know I told you to take the chance to resolve your feelings, and I know how you feel about seizing the day and all," Kate prefaced her statement. Cassie raised an eyebrow.

"Just… Just protect your heart, okay? You're my favourite little sister, and I don't want you to get hurt."

Cassie rushed over to Kate, pressing a smacking kiss against her cheek, the same way she used to when she was four years old. "I'm your only little sister," she reminded her. With a wiggle of her fingers, Cassie strode confidently onto the sidewalk.

* * *

Sneaking into a rehearsal room and watching Jacqueline dance was like being a voyeur into her own past. Cassie couldn't count how many times she'd done the same thing when Jacqueline had been nothing more than the fiercely determined ballet student who was resolute about becoming a professional dancer if only to say "I told you so" to her stuffily traditional parents.

Cassie recognised the solo Jacqueline was working on as one of Odile's. She had no problems seeing her former lover as the seductress spurred on by an evil magician. Jacqueline had always had a certain charisma, and she had no problems using it to get exactly what she wanted. Cassie suppressed a shiver as she recalled her time in Paris. Jacqueline had been one of the very first people she'd met in the City of Lights, and she'd been completely overwhelmed by these new feelings that hit her in all her secret places. Jacqueline had been almost ruthless in her pursuit of Cassie. She still remembered the wolfish grin Jacqueline had given her when she'd politely informed her that she didn't get feelings like that for girls.

"_Then why are you looking at me like you've imagined me naked?" Jacqueline had whispered in her ear, her taut body pressed up against Cassie's. _

They'd kissed in front of the Théâtre de la Huchette two days later.

"This is a closed rehearsal," Jacqueline called out pointedly as she moved to the barre to take a sip of water.

"And that's stopped me before?" Cassie goaded her from her position leaning on the doorframe. "I always did like watching you dance."

"You liked looking at my ass in my leotard," Jacqueline quipped.

Cassie tilted her head, a lecherous glint in her eye. "Not much has changed."

"Is that so?" Jacqueline dropped to the floor and began to stretch her legs.

"Don't play coy."

Jacqueline stretched a leg over her head and gave Cassie a coquettish smile. "Whatever do you mean?"

"It's cute the way you think that I don't know that you saw me come into the ballroom at the gala in a big group," Cassie smirked when Jacqueline adjusted her position to sit spread eagled on the floor. "You approached Martha, knowing that she simply wouldn't be able to resist introducing you to her family. Face it, Ma Belle Peche, you want me." (My Beautiful Peach)

Jacqueline slowly stood. "You seem awfully sure of yourself," she commented.

"When you look at me like that, it's hard not to be."

Jacqueline stepped in front of Cassie, slowly rising onto her toes in fifth position. "It's a very, very good thing you're right," she breathed, before inching forward and pressing her lips to Cassie's.

* * *

**Just four more chapters, guys :) We're almost at the end.**

**Also- if you're that way inclined, please check out my latest one shot _Hymns Upon Your Lips, _which is my interpretation of just what happened in that last scene of Always. It's also my very first M rated fic... so have a look, and drop me a line.  
**

**Let me know what you think about this chapter, too! Your reviews rock my world!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Ahh! Guys, I am SO sorry about the delay in posting this! My life has been super crazy busy, and I've had the worst writer's block ever... (and I've been doing a rewatch of Alias... holy crap! that SHOW *faints from stress*)**

**And because I'm a goose... I forgot to thank Tadpole24 in my last chapter! So double thanks to you my darling girl! Also- big thanks to ****Juliettaah for her fabulous French translations. Follow both these beautiful girls on twitter :)**

******Mood music for this chapter is on my tumblr- Brookemopolitan dot tumblr dot com**

******Disclaimer: The writers of Castle don't have to worry about things like shitty Olympic medal tallies... **

* * *

This was just ridiculous. Cassie sighed and looked under the couch she was sure she'd sat on at some point or another the night before.

"Jacqueline!" She called out, as she ferreted around between the cushions. "Jacqueline, have you seen my panties?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Jacqueline replied over the whirr of the blow dryer.

"This isn't funny, Jacqueline! I have to go to work and I'm wearing a skirt. Can I please have my underwear back?" Cassie whined.

Jacqueline smirked and twisted her hair into the tight bun required for rehearsals (there'd been some disaster with the show last night, and all the principle dancers had been called in to work with the stage manager urgently).

Cassie huffed. "I'm stealing a pair of yours!" She called out, before rummaging through Jacqueline's neatly organised drawers. She noticed more than one of her shirts folded in amongst the leotards and leg warmers before spotting a pair that would probably fit her and she quickly slipped them on.

"Alright, let's go!" Jacqueline declared. She grabbed Cassie's hand, and pulled her out the door.

* * *

"Guess what?" Jacqueline asked as they swiped their Metro cards and made their way down to the subway platform.

"Your dad dyed his hair green."

Jacqueline raised an eyebrow at her.

"You said guess. You didn't say it had to be a serious guess."

"The stage manager said I could have some days off the show next week," Jacqueline pronounced. She leaned over and pressed a kiss to Cassie's mouth.

"Are you kidding? That's awesome!"

Jacqueline slid her hands from Cassie's waist to rest just below where was socially acceptable on the small of her back. "I thought you'd like that."

Cassie quickly kissed Jacqueline before their train pulled up. "I do. I like it very much." Cassie pulled Jacqueline onto the train and pulled them into the corner seat. Jacqueline wasted no time in pouncing on Cassie and kissing her thoroughly.

"You should move in with me," Cassie breathed when they finally pulled apart for air.

"Pardon?"

"Why shouldn't you?" Cassie asked. "We're pretty much always together, anyway, and I'm sure you're sick of living in a hotel room."

Jacqueline pondered for a second. "Screw it. Let's move in together."

The rest of their subway trip was spent making out, much to the chagrin of the tourists with the loud squawking accents three rows over from them.

Cassie eventually broke away from Jacqueline to duck off at the subway stop closest to The Old Haunt. Jacqueline waved from the window, before holding up a very familiar scrap of cotton fished from her bag.

Cassie only shook her head before heading out the exit.

* * *

Cassie pinned a flower into her hair and adjusted the hem of her cocktail dress.

"Is this acceptable?" Jacqueline asked from the doorway, clad in coral coloured dress, slipping a pair of turquoise earrings on.

"You look gorgeous," Cassie answered honestly. She checked her phone, and quickly stepped into her navy high heels. "Now we have to motor, because we were supposed to be there like, five minutes ago."

* * *

The taxi dropped them off just before the entryway to the launch party for _Frozen Heat._

Cassie grabbed Jacqueline's hand and pulled her back slightly. "I um…" Cassie bit her lip; heedless of the lipstick she was probably smudging. "I haven't exactly told Kate that you're crashing at our place. So if it's no big deal… maybe don't tell her just yet?"

"Cassandre, are you ashamed of me?" Jacqueline enquired, one hand perched on her hip.

"_No!_ God, no, not at all. Nothing like that," Cassie reassured her. "Kate's just… she can be really stubborn, and if she finds out about this in the wrong way, she's going to be against it from the start. So just let me talk to her, okay?"

"I can do that. But you will tell her, won't you?"

"Of course I'll tell her. Just not tonight."

"Why not?" Jacqueline demanded.

Cassie took Jacqueline's hand and started walking with her towards the entry.

"Tonight isn't about us. This is Castle's night. I don't want to ruin that. That means we need to keep out hands to ourselves, I'm afraid. Now stop pouting, and be your usual charming self," Cassie ordered as they reached the pale blue carpet.

This truly was Jacqueline's world. She had no problem smiling for the camera, pouting demurely as she clung to Cassie's hand. Cassie couldn't hide her shock, when close to the end of the carpet; Jacqueline grabbed Cassie and pulled her in for a kiss. Cassie didn't need to have her eyes open to know the cameras covering the event were going wild.

Cassie quickly broke the kiss, shooting a grin to the still madly flashing cameras.

"Mais qu'est-ce que tu fais, Jacqueline ?"(What the hell, Jacqueline?) Cassie hissed under her breath, slipping into French so there was less chance they'd be overheard as they moved from the red carpet to the person marking their names at the door.

"Comment ça?" (What did I do?) Jacqueline asked innocently.

"Tu sais ce que tu as fait ! Tu te souviens que j'ai dit que ce soir ce n'était pas à propos de nous ?" (You know what you did! Do you remember me saying tonight isn't about us?)

"Et ça ne l'est pas. C'est vraiment un crime d'embrasser la femme que j'aime ?" (And it isn't about us. Is it such a crime to kiss my lover?) Jacqueline pouted.

"Ça l'est quand tu es Jacqueline Prideux, connue pour être une danseuse étoile lesbienne fière de l'être et une dragueuse effrontée. Tu penses vraiment que ça ne va pas se retrouver dans tous les magazines à ragots de la ville ?" (It is when you're Jacqueline Prideux, notably out and proud lesbian prima ballerina and shameless womaniser. Do you really think this won't end up in every gossip rag in town?) Cassie growled under her breath. She strode into the ballroom and snagged a glass of champagne from the first tray she saw.

"Qu'est-ce que ça peut bien faire si ça finit dans tous les magazines de la ville ? Au moins, on parlera plus du lancement du livre,"(Who cares if it does end up in every magazine in town? If anything, it will raise the profile of the book launch,) Jacqueline pointed out as she sipped on a glass of champagne.

"Moi ça me dérange ! Parce que, comme je l'ai dit il y a une seconde, ce soir n'est pas à propos de toi ou de moi. C'est à propos de Castle." (I care! Because like I said a second ago, tonight is not about you or me. It is about Castle.)

"Je vais me repoudrer le nez," (I'm going to go powder my nose,) Jacqueline announced coldly, before turning tale and marching towards the bathrooms.

Cassie sighed, and placed her empty glass down on a table. She didn't know who'd done the decorating for the event, but the ice sculpture of the New York City skyline that was the focal point of the room (gently glowing with multi-coloured lights beneath it) was stunning.

"Hey, stranger!" Cassie felt a pair of arms wrap round her waist, and she felt the familiar squish of an Alexis Castle patented hug.

"What's cracking, ginger ninja?" Cassie asked cheerfully.

"I'm keeping busy. Between the Columbia summer programme and my internship, I'm barely at home."

"And I'm sure you have no complaints about that," Cassie teased.

Alexis wrinkled her nose. For all her mature talk about knowing what a serious, adult relationship entailed, it didn't mean that she actually wanted to be at home for long periods of time as the honeymoon phase of Operation Caskett unfolded.

"What about you? How's stuff with Jacqueline?" Alexis asked; one copper eyebrow raised.

Cassie shrugged. "It's a tempest in a tea cup. It always was, though."

"Oh no. What happened now?"

Cassie rolled her eyes. "She's having a hissy fit because I told her to keep her hands to herself for the night."

"Are you kidding me?"

Cassie sighed. "Here's the thing about Jacqueline. She's a prima ballerina, right? That means she's used to being the centre of attention. And if you tell her she can't be… well," Cassie shrugged. "She's probably out on the balcony, sucking down half a package of cigarettes as we speak."

"Should you go after her?" Alexis asked curiously.

"Now? No _way!_" Cassie answered. "She'd eat my face. I'll let her cool down first."

"I'm kind of glad I like boys exclusively. I don't know if I could deal with girls who don't say what they actually mean," Alexis mused.

"It is a tough cross to bear, I won't pretend otherwise, but somebody has to do it."

A random socialite Cassie didn't know (and frankly, didn't care for) drew Alexis into conversation about college acceptance letters. Cassie quietly slipped out of the conversation, and after snagging another glass of champagne, made her way over to the artistically stacked copies of _Frozen Heat. _She picked up a copy of the novel, flipping over to read the blurb. Cassie scanned the room. There was no way she'd be able to smuggle a copy of the book out of the room, even with the empire cut of her white dress. She'd have to wait another week, like some kind of plebeian commoner.

On a whim, Cassie flipped to the dedication.

_For the Babushka dolls who have filled the spaces I didn't realise were empty- CB, the uninhibited nymph of a little sister I never knew I needed, and KB… always. _

Cassie jumped at the hand on her shoulder.

"Privet," (Hi,) Kate greeted her cheerfully.

Cassie sniffled back her happy tears, before pulling her sister into a hug. "Katie, you are a babe! You look like a Bond chick!" Cassie exclaimed, taking in her sister's silver cocktail dress that glistened in the light of the million fairy lights around the room and curled hair.

"You don't scrub up so badly yourself, kid. Even if you did steal my shoes," Kate replied.

"You would have said yes if I asked!" Cassie defended herself. She thrust the copy of _Frozen Heat _she'd kept hold of into Kate's hands. "Look at the dedication," Cassie ordered.

Kate flipped over the front cover, a fond smile sneaking onto her face as she took in the words of the dedication.

"I take it you found the dedication?" Castle asked. The lovesick expression on Kate's face only grew when she looked up at him.

"You know, I always wanted a big brother," Cassie commented. She stuck her tongue out at Castle playfully.

"Really? I hear that big brothers are supposed to play pranks on their little sisters and torment their dates," Castle teased.

"Pull a prank on me, I freaking dare you," Cassie challenged. "You have no idea the shit storm I will unleash in response. And you've met Jacqueline. Do you really think you can torment her?"

Castle pondered the steely ballerina who looked like a strong breeze would knock her over. "Maybe not."

Cassie winked. "Thank you, though," she said sincerely. "For the dedication. And for being my big brother. It's really cool." Cassie wasn't shocked in the slightest when Castle pulled her into an affectionate hug. He pulled away and pressed a kiss to Kate's cheek. "I'm getting the evil eye from Gina _and _Paula. I better go before they lock me in the cage."

"So," Kate began. Cassie knew what was coming. "Where's Jacqueline?"

"She's sulking," Cassie answered. "She didn't like that I told her that we had to behave ourselves tonight. I refuse to indulge her behaviour."

"Wow, that sounds healthy," Kate commented with an eyeroll.

"I'm totally going to pretend you didn't just try and give me relationship advice," Cassie quipped, trying not to let her hackles raise. "She's throwing a temper tantrum. You always ignored mine." Cassie took a long sip out of her champagne glass. "This night is all about the love of _your _life. I'm being considerate!"

"Alright, Cassie, relax!" Kate soothed her.

* * *

The night had been fun. Alexis had introduced Cassie to a whole bunch of trust fund kids (ones who weren't as awful as Cassie had initially imagined them to be), Kate had shown true personal growth as she smiled and actually acknowledged her role as Richard Castle's muse, and she'd danced gracefully with Castle at the request (read: order) of Paula, all for the sake of good publicity.

Cassie knew she had to suck it up. Jacqueline Antoinette Prideux was at least as stubborn as Cassie, and more than once in their time together in Paris, they hadn't spoken for days at a time because of a disagreement about something so insignificant they could never remember what they were actually having make up sex about.

"Would you like to dance?"

Jacqueline regarded Cassie primly. "Won't that draw too much attention to us?"

Cassie gave her a sharp look. Jacqueline was just being sour for the sake of it now. Jacqueline accepted Cassie's hand, and followed her out to the dancefloor.

Cassie knew it was the right move. The soft smile that spread across Jacqueline's face was luminous as they slowly swayed while the jazz singer that had been hired sang about how he fell in love with a girl who was in love with the world.

"You wanna go do something crazy?" Cassie breathed.

* * *

Cassie opened her eyes blearily. The lack of windows in her room meant she actually had no idea what day it was. The last few days had been a blur of Jacqueline. She fumbled on the floor for clothes, eventually finding one of Jacqueline's slightly too small and too tight tank tops, and a pair of her denim shorts.

Cassie took a quick shower, before making her way to the kitchen. Jacqueline, of course, was still sound asleep. The girl could sleep like the dead.

Cassie had just finished brewing a pot of coffee when the front door swung open.

"Hey," Kate greeted her breathlessly, clad in sweaty gym clothes. "I need a quick shower," Kate declared, gliding past Cassie towards the bathroom.

"Morning," Cassie greeted dubiously; taking in her freshly showered and dressed sister. "You've emerged from the love den," she commented with a grin, thumbing through the mail for anything addressed to her.

Kate accepted the cup of coffee with a grateful smile. "You make Castle's place sound like a brothel or something."

"Well, you clearly don't have a case, and you're not coming over for more clothes," Cassie surmised. "Oh, for fuck's sake, Katie, you aren't running away, are you?"

"No!" Kate replied emphatically. "I'm not running away. Everything is great. Everything is just _so _great."

"Oh my God. You're freaking out about the fact that you're not freaking out," Cassie gasped.

"I am not!" Kate argued. "Oh my god… I totally am, aren't I?" She realised, her cheeks crimson.

"Katie, it would be funny if it weren't borderline pathetic. Now text him, and let him know you needed some sister time." Cassie commanded, mock seriously. She stood up, and reached into the pantry to snag a box of cereal.

"What the hell is that?" Kate demanded, pointing to Cassie's exposed side where the tiny shirt she was wearing had ridden up.

"What's what?" Cassie asked.

"Don't try that with me Cassie. I know what a new tattoo looks like. When did you get it?"

Cassie resisted the urge to scratch the scabbing skin of the week and a half old angel wing that sat on her left side, at the spot where her hips tapered into her slim waist. "The night of the book launch," Cassie admitted. "It was late, we walked past the tattoo parlour, and one thing led to another…"

"Is this your way of telling me you and Jacqueline have hers and hers tattoos?" Kate inquired.

Cassie rolled her eyes, "Yes, Babushka," she answered sullenly, plunking a cup of coffee in front of Kate.

"Cassie, I want you to stop and think for a second…"

"Oh my God, Kate, would you relax? I am fine!"

"Really? Because a couple of weeks ago you were the one telling me about your psycho ex the French ballerina. As I recall, the only thing that worked for you was your sex life, and now as far as I can see, all the two of you do is argue and sleep together. Cassie, I'm worried about you!"

"Well, _don't!_ I'm fine. Go back to your happy place with Castle, and leave me alone!" Cassie snapped, instantly slipping into Beckett defence mode; saying the most hurtful thing you can think of in the hopes of pushing the other person away.

Kate was way too smart for that. "Nice try, Cassie. I'm not leaving." She watched the violent way Cassie was pouring muesli into a bowl, and quietly stood and moved to the refrigerator, intent on grabbing the yogurt for Cassie.

"What the hell is all this vegan shit in my refrigerator?" Kate demanded, observing the soymilk and tofu with a curled lip. Kate very clearly remembered the night she'd announced to her entire family at a Sunday meal at her grandparents that eating animals was inhumane and revolting, and from that day onward she was vegan. Babushka had slapped her, before placing a plate of beef stroganoff in front of her, making it clear in no uncertain terms that "Ona ne riskovala svoyeĭ shyei izbezhatʹ sovet·skogo ublyudkov v matushku-Rossiyu kontrabandnym putem iz Moskvy , zavernutye vkover vnuchkoĭ nastolʹko nyeuvazhitelʹno i prevratitʹ yee nos na yedu ona lyubovno podgotovlennyĭ dlya nyee."(She hadn't risked her neck escaping the Soviet bastards in Mother Russia by being smuggled out of Moscow rolled in a carpet for her granddaughter to be so disrespectful and turn her nose up at the food she'd lovingly prepared for her.) Then she'd made it clear to the whole family that nobody would be leaving the table until Kate had finished her meal. She'd been seventeen at the time.

It only took Kate's detective mind to put together the clues. "How long has she been living here?" Kate asked, her voice quiet and tone icy.

"Katya, this isn't a big deal…"

"The hell it isn't!" Kate exploded. "It is MY name on the lease, Cassandra. I don't have a clue who the hell this girl is, and you invite her into _my _house, without telling me, and you expect me to just be okay with it?"

"Vy by potishe? Ona v sosednyeĭ komnate!" (Would you keep your voice down? She's in the next room!) Cassie hissed.

"Nu, ona zhivet zdesʹ , ne tak li? Ne dolzhna ona bytʹ prichastnym k tomu, chto proiskhodit, kogda sestry sporitʹ?" (Well, she lives here, doesn't she? Shouldn't she be privy to what happens when sisters argue?) Kate growled back, her use of Russian doing nothing to hide the venom in her words.

"Pochemu on dazhe imyeet znachenie? Eto ne to, vy na samom dele zhivut zdesʹ i syeĭchas , v lyubom sluchae."(Why does it even matter? Its not like you really live here right now, anyway.)

Kate refused to rise to the bait. "Dazhe ne pytaĭtesʹ otvlechʹ menya i syeĭchas. YA ne mogu tratitʹ stolʹko vremeni, zdesʹ , kak ranʹshe , no ya vse yeshche plachu arendnuyu platu vovremya, i v kvartire po-prezhnemu pod svoim imenem . YA imyeyu pravo znatʹ, kto zhivet zdesʹ, i yego osnovnye vezhlivosti, chto vy, mozhet bytʹ, govoritʹ ob etom mne."(Don't even try and distract me right now. I may not be spending as much time here as I used to, but I still pay my rent on time, and the apartment is still under my name. I have the right to know who is living here, and it's basic common courtesy that you'd maybe mention it to me.)

Kate paused, and softened her tone. "Cassie, I know you've been alone for a long time. I know you're not used to having somebody care about you. Let me be clear; I am not going anywhere. And I'm so worried about you, Malenkaya (Little One). I'm telling you, moving this fast is a bad idea. Cassie, she's only in town for a few more days. What is going to happen when she's gone?" Kate's phone buzzed. She quickly answered, murmuring quietly as she scrawled down an address.

"A body dropped," Kate explained. "Don't think this conversation is over." Kate moved towards the safe, quickly pulling out her gun and badge. She crossed back over to Cassie, dropping a kiss on her forehead. "I love you."

Moments after Kate had cleared out of the apartment, Jacqueline floated into the kitchen.

"What was all the angry sounding Russian about?" She inquired. Cassie's only response was to pull Jacqueline into an aggressive kiss, before forcing her back towards the bedroom.

* * *

Cassie sighed happily as Jacqueline ran her fingers through Cassie's sweaty magenta hair.

"Jacqueline," Cassie began quietly. "What exactly are we doing?" She asked finally.

"I should think it's quite obvious," Jacqueline responded with a chuckle, pressing a kiss to Cassie's temple.

"Well, besides the obvious," Cassie responded, rolling away slightly so she couldn't be distracted by Jacqueline's hands in her hair. "What are we doing? The ballet only has a few more days in town. Then what?"

Jacqueline rolled onto her back, pondering Cassie's words. "Come with me!" Jacqueline suggested, her eyes sparkling with delight. "Pack up, and come. We're going to Vancouver next." Jacqueline grabbed both of Cassie's hands as she sat up. "Cassandre, we could get married!"

Cassie sat up. "I've just built a life for myself here. I have a good job, a place to stay, and I even have a family. I can't just leave." Cassie fiddled with the thin sheet on the bed. "You could stay?" She suggested quietly. "Any ballet company in New York would be lucky to have you!"

Cassie dared to look up. Jacqueline's eyes said it all.

Cassie felt like the sudden flood of emotions was strangling her. "You won't stay, will you?" She took a deep breath. "Please, Jacqueline. I love you, damnit!"

Jacqueline pressed a soft kiss to Cassie's mouth. She tasted like regret and farewell. "Go run yourself a bath," She ordered quietly. "By the time you get out again, I'll be gone. It'll be like I was never here."

* * *

Cassie walked into the Precinct, her tears barely kept at bay. She stepped over to Kate's desk. "So, I know you probably hate me right now," Cassie bit out, fighting the knot in her throat. Kate looked up, and saw the tormented look on her little sister's face.

"I just really need my big sister now," Cassie gasped, before bursting into tears.

Kate dropped her pen, before throwing an arm around Cassie's shoulder, and urging her toward the break room. She pulled the blinds shut, before turning to Cassie. "What happened?" Kate asked.

"We broke up," Cassie replied miserably. Kate quickly threw her arms around her, and let Cassie cry into the collar of her crisp white button up. "She was perfect, and we broke up!"

"Oh, Cassie, she was far from perfect," Kate soothed.

"I asked her to stay, and she wouldn't. I asked her for one thing, and she can't give it to me!"

Kate ran a hand through her sister's hair, trying hard not to think of the dark nights after their mother's death that they'd spent in this very position. "Cassie, do you want your passport back?" Kate asked.

"I can't just leave," Cassie replied. "She wanted me to go with her. She even suggested we elope, but I just can't."

"Because of me?" Kate asked.

Cassie shook her head. "Not entirely. Don't flatter yourself, Katya." She reached into her handbag and handed Kate an envelope. "I got into college," She explained with a watery grin. "I start at NYU in the fall."

"Congratulations!" Kate trilled, kissing Cassie's cheek. "You'll love NYU. Do you know what you're going to study?"

"Art major, definitely," Cassie answered. "And I'll have to talk to a couple of professors to work out the balance, but I need to do courses in criminal justice, psychology and probably forensic anthropology."

Kate raised an eyebrow. She couldn't imagine why Cassie would need to study such an unusual spectrum of subjects.

"I'm going to be a forensic sketch artist," Cassie explained. "I want to do something that makes a difference, you know? I can't be a super cop like you, but those sketches I did helped with The Old Haunt case, right? I figure this is a way I can do something I'm good at, and help people get justice."

"Sounds like the perfect career for you. Maybe someday we'll work on the same case," Kate replied. She sighed when she heard a knock at the door.

"Kate, we've got Hamilton in for questioning," Ryan called out through the door.

"Cass, I'm sorry," Kate apologised.

"No biggie," Cassie replied easily. "I've gotta get to work anyway. Annie wants me to start early because the boys are playing. She seems to think people spend more at the bar when I play with them," Cassie explained. She fumbled through her bag for a compact, and cringed when she saw her tearstained face. "If you wrap the case, you should come."

"Yeah, well I'm pretty sure Hamilton is our guy, so if he confesses quickly, you never know." Kate squeezed Cassie tightly, before kissing her cheek.

"I'm really sorry that she hurt you," Kate said sincerely, before striding out of the room to an interrogation.

* * *

It didn't take an idiot to realise that Cassie wasn't her usual self at work. She kept her head down, and she worked hard, but she was missing her usual sparkle. She provided good service, but that was it. She didn't playfully semi-flirt with the regulars, and she barely cracked a grin at the antics behind the bar.

"One Shirley Temple, please." Cassie rolled her eyes when she saw Castle sit down at the bar. She pushed a Scotch towards him with a hint of a smirk.

"Kate told me about Jacqueline. Are you alright?" Castle asked sincerely.

Cassie shrugged. "Oh yeah, I'm cool. I'm a rolling stone. Give me a week and I'll be asking Jacqueline who?"

Castle nodded and took a sip of his Scotch. "Well, if you need anything, let me know, okay?"

Cassie nodded. "Thanks, Castle."

Castle gestured for Cassie to move closer. "I wanted to give this back to you," he whispered, holding up the ring Cassie had given him a few weeks back. "You do remember giving me this, don't you?" Castle teased, recalling Cassie' reaction to the painkillers she'd been given for her concussion.

"Don't make me come over there and kick your ass," Cassie yapped playfully. She plucked the ring out of Castle's open palm and slid it back onto her finger. "Does that mean you have the ring?" She squealed at Castle's nod. "Can I see it?"

"Not before she does," Castle replied.

Cassie shot him a vicious grin. "Well, I guess it's time I welcome you to the family." With that, she grabbed two shot glasses, and a bottle of vodka.

"If you're going to marry a Russian, you need to learn how to drink like one," Cassie announced, pouring two shots. "Now, you need to look me in the eye for the toast and when you shoot this. It has to go down in one mouthful," Cassie explained. She picked up her shot glass. "Za krasavitsu nevestu!" (To the beautiful bride) she declared, before tapping her shot glass against Castle's and swallowing it quickly, not spluttering at the taste the way Castle did.

"Gotta keep eye contact, Castle. If you don't, you're cursed with seven years of bad sex," Cassie teased, pouring another shot. "It's an old tradition that if you keep eye contact during the toast and shot, you can see the other person's soul," Cassie explained. "So make sure you blow out before you do the shot. You lose most of the taste that way." She pushed the shot towards him. "Ypʹem za lyubovʹ!" (Let's drink to love!) This time, Castle managed to get the shot down without choking on the bitter taste.

"We'll make a proper Russian out of you yet," Cassie told him with a wink, before turning away to serve at the bar.

* * *

As it turned out, Hamilton was the man that Kate was after. It had taken less than five minutes to get a confession out of him, and she'd managed to convince Esposito and Ryan, plus Lanie and Jenny to join her and Castle (along with Alexis) at the Old Haunt for a few drinks. Cassie could see Kate loosening up and getting a little bit giggly with the Cosmos she was continually sending over to the table.

She handed Tommo a jug of beer and a stack of glasses, before taking the sheet of paper her offered her. "Set list for tonight?" She confirmed.

Tommo nodded. "Just for when you come up and join us. But we can be pretty fluid with it, if you want to change it up."

Cassie nodded. "Sounds good. I'm just going to go count my till before I change, and then I'm up with you guys."

Being on stage was good therapy. Cassie was running on adrenaline, asking Evie to let her hair hang down, and breaking out her spazziest dance moves for their cover of _Hey Ya_ by Outkast.

She only wished that she'd asked the boys to change the Gaga cover they'd wanted to do. She should have known better than to think she could sing _You And I_ after her rollercoaster day. She had finally gotten a handle on her emotions when she saw a petite blonde step into the pub and stand quietly by the bar. Cassie finished the song, and quickly said something to Daz.

"We're going to take it down, just for a couple of songs," Cassie called out as slung Vera across her frame, before plugging in her faithful semi acoustic into the sound system. She waved the boys offstage. "So, this one goes out to a special person. They know who they are."

Cassie began to strum the guitar, praying that she'd be able to handle her emotions along with this stripped back song

_Summer after high school, when we first met  
We make-out in your Mustang to Radiohead  
And on my eighteenth birthday, we got matching tattoos_

Cassie bit her lip as she watched Jacqueline's fingers brush against her side.

_Used to steal your parents' liquor and climb to the roof  
Talk about our future like we had a clue  
Never planned that one day I'd be losing you_

Cassie felt tears fill her eyes, but she powered through the song none the less.

_In another life, I would be your girl  
We keep all our promises, be us against the world  
In another life, I would make you stay  
So I don't have to say you were the one that got away  
The one that got away_

_I was June and you were my Johnny Cash_  
_Never one without the other, we made a pact_  
_Sometimes when I miss you, I put those records on, whoa_

_Someone said you had your tattoo removed_  
_Saw you downtown, singing the blues_  
_It's time to face the music, I'm no longer your muse_

She wouldn't cry. She _wouldn't. _She also wouldn't think of lazy naked Sundays where she'd play guitar for Jacqueline for hours

_In another life, I would be your girl  
We keep all our promises, be us against the world  
In another life, I would make you stay  
So I don't have to say you were the one that got away  
The one that got away_

_The one, the one, the one_  
_The one that got away_

_All this money can't buy me a time machine, no  
Can't replace you with a million rings, no  
I should'a told you what you meant to me, whoa  
Cause now I pay the price_

Cassie paused for a second, the tears slowly beginning to slip down her cheeks. There was no point holding anything back. She changed the song up slightly.

_Never mind, I'll find someone like you_

_I wish nothing but the best for you, too_

_Don't forget me, I begged,_

_I remember you said_

_Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead_

_Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead_

Cassie dared to look over at Jacqueline. Apparently she wasn't the only one crying.  
_  
In another life, I would be your girl  
We keep all our promises, be us against the world  
In another life, I would make you stay  
So I don't have to say you were the one that got away  
The one that got away_

_The one (the one)_  
_The one (the one)_  
_The one (the one)_

_In another life, I would make you stay_  
_So I don't have to say you were the one that got away_

Jacqueline dropped a tiny bunch of flowers on the bar, and blew Cassie a kiss, before melting into the shadows and out the door.

_The one that got away._

Cassie took advantage of the commotion of the boys coming back onto the stage to wipe her eyes. It was done now. She'd said her final goodbye to her first love.

"You guys are going to have to help out a little bit with this one," Cassie told the crowd. "I'll tell you when," Cassie promised, before beginning to play the opening chords of the song.

_This is the greatest and best song in the world . . . tribute._

Cassie giggled when she heard the enthusiastic response of the crowd_Long time ago me and my buddy Tommo here... __  
__we was hitchhikin' down a long and lonesome road. __  
__All of a sudden,__  
__there shined a shiny demon...__  
__in the middle... __  
__of the road._

* * *

The rest of the show had been a rousing success. To Cassie's eternal joy, Castle had forced Kate onto the dancefloor when they'd played _Are You Gonna Be My Girl_ by Jet (he insisted that the song had been a pretty good metaphor for their relationship), and the group of Aussie expats from Melbourne who'd found the joint by accident went totally batshit crazy when Daz had shoved his electric guitar into Cassie's hands and jumped down to the piano, and they'd played a rousing rendition of _Khe Sahn,_ an Aussie anthem that Cassie found privately hilarious because Australia hadn't even fought there during the Viet Nam War.

The bar had shut, and Castle had insisted that the group from the 12th stay behind for a few hours. Cassie had taught both Ryan and Esposito how to pour their own damn beers, and she was balanced on a stool, beer in front of her, clutching her guitar as she acted as their personal jukebox. _  
_

"You can't possibly sing that many types of music," Jenny (an accomplished pianist, who'd just finished playing _Piano Man_, leading to Castle, Kate, Ryan and Esposito having a weird quiet bonding moment that Cassie didn't really understand) argued playfully with Cassie after she'd belted out some Aretha with her guitar.

"I don't always sing them well!" Cassie replied. "But I love all music. Even country. You should emotionally prepare yourself now. And all the happy couples in the room should get their asses up and get ready to dance!" Cassie ordered. Cassie made a show of cracking her knuckles and neck. "Now ya'll are gonna find out about my soft spot for two different kinds of music… Country, AND Western," Cassie joked in a faux Southern accent as she began to play.

_There's a new wind blowin' like I've never known.  
I'm breathin' deeper than I've ever done.  
And it sure feels good, to finally feel the way I do.  
I wanna love somebody,  
Love somebody like you. _

Cassie had a soft spot for Keith Urban, and she'd never be ashamed.

_An' I'm lettin' go of all my lonely yesterdays.  
I've forgiven myself for the mistakes I've made.  
Now there's just one thing, the only thing I wanna do, mmm, mmm.  
I wanna love somebody,  
Love somebody like you. _

Cassie was still heartbroken, and she knew it, but the three dancing couples in the room gave her just a little bit of hope that she'd get over it, and find something real.

_Yeah, I wanna feel the sunshine,_  
_Shinin' down on me and you._  
_When you put your arms around me,_  
_You let me know there's nothing in this world I can't do._

Castle caught Cassie's eye. There was no way… Cassie tried not to gape, and kept playing.

_I used to run in circles goin' no-where fast.  
I'd take, uh, one step forward and two steps back.  
Couldn't walk a straight line even if I wanted to, mmm, mmm.  
I wanna love somebody,  
Love somebody like you._

Cassie quietly strummed the guitar solo, curious to see what Castle was going to do.

"I wanted to wait," He said, slowly pulling Kate to a stop. "I was going to do something romantic, and intimate, and perfect. So this could be something that you look back on for the rest of your life."

Kate's jaw dropped open.

"But this ring has been burning a hole in my pocket all day. And right now, this is everything I need for it to be perfect." Rick dropped to one knee.

"Kate," He crooned. "Katherine," he tested as he pulled a box from his pocket. "Ekaterina," he murmured, holding up the box. "I love you. All I want to do for the rest of my life is love you. Will you marry me?"

Kate didn't even hesitate. "Yes," she breathed. Her grin was uncontrollable he slid the ring on her finger. She pulled him up to stand so she could kiss him properly. Cassie chanced a look over at Alexis. She had a smile so huge it was threatening to crack her face as she snapped photos on her iPhone.

"Cassie, put your tongue back in your head and keep playing! I want to dance with my fiancé!" Kate ordered, her own grin huge.

Cassie nodded, still shocked but totally happy as she kept playing.

_Yeah, I wanna feel the sunshine,  
Shinin' down on me and you.  
When you put your arms around me,  
Well, baby there ain't nothing in this world I can't do. _

Cassie had chosen this song on a whim to play, but she was shocked at how perfect a choice it was for the happy couple.

_Sometimes it's hard for me to understand,_  
_But you're teachin' me to be a better man._  
_I don't want to take this life for granted like I used to do, no, no._  
_I wanna love somebody,_  
_Love somebody like you._

_I'm ready to love somebody,_  
_Love somebody like you. oooh._

_An' I wanna love somebody,_  
_Love somebody like you, yeah._

Cassie finished playing, and carelessly threw the guitar back into its case before dashing over with everybody else to congratulate the happy couple.

Cassie watched with a grin as Ryan and Esposito crushed Kate in a group bear hug. She grabbed Alexis's hand. "Now, you should know, I'm not a regular aunty, I'm a cool aunty," she declared with a grin.

"A cool aunty would let me stay at her place tonight," Alexis responded instantly.

Cassie vaguely considered teasing Alexis about what her Dad would be doing that night. Then she realised that Alexis wasn't just asking because of the proposal. Cassie grabbed Alexis into a bone-breaking hug, grateful that she'd befriended somebody with such a heart of gold.

"Done."

* * *

**No, this is not the way the show will be going. No, I don't care... this fic is my happy place, and damnit, I want to write a wedding!**

**Favourites and follows are really cool, guys... but reviews are better. To the point where every reviewer will receive an ANZAC biscuit... which is an Australian classic and it tastes like heaven!**

**Remember to follow me on twitter and tumblr!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Thank you all for all the love for the last chapter :) I'm glad you like the disgustingly fluffy way I'm taking this baby.**

**This chapter was written under the influence of red wine and copious amounts of cookies'n'cream ice cream.**

**As usual, a million thanks to Tad... And fair warning, for those who have never watched _Alias_1) You should, and 2) there is a spoiler in this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing by my car and my insanity :)**

* * *

Kate transitioned from sleep to being alert slowly. She stretched luxuriously, before the thin beam of light coming out from underneath the heavy curtains in Rick's room cast a shimmering reflection across the room. She couldn't believe she was actually _this_ girl. She chanced a glance over at Rick, making certain he was still asleep, before holding out her hand to inspect the piece of jewellery she'd wear for the rest of her life. It fit perfectly on her left hand. As usual, her gorgeous fiancée (no more vacillating between boyfriend and partner to describe their relationship) had gotten it right. She held up both her hands to inspect. Fleetingly, she toyed with the idea of heading back to her Eastern European roots and wearing her ring on her right hand. It took her all of thirty seconds to decide that her ring would be staying exactly where Rick put it, on her left hand.

The ring was gorgeous. Rick had shown extraordinary restraint in not picking the largest, flashiest diamond the jeweller could find him. Instead, there was a single round diamond set in the middle, sitting on a thin band of black stones. They were hugged on either side by a halo of flawless diamonds. The setting was platinum, naturally, darling. A disgustingly girlish giggle escaped Kate's lips before she could stop it. She was so happy she wanted to go screaming from the rooftops. She wanted to race down to her Crown Vic, and go driving with the gumball wailing, using her loudspeaker to announce to the world that she'd officially taken Rick Castle off the market. Permanently.

Kate twisted to look at the clock. She carefully slipped out of Rick's embrace, before snagging her phone and his shirt from the night before padding gently out to the kitchen.

She headed toward the coffee machine and carefully measured out the right amount of ground beans, before gently frothing milk with the wand of Rick's fancy machine (despite what he thought, Kate was more than capable of making her own coffee. She had simply enjoyed the puppy dog smile she got along with her morning cup of Joe).

She moved into the living room, setting her cup down next to the cup she'd made for him before unlocking her phone and making a call.

"Gates,"

"Good morning, Sir," Kate enunciated, suddenly nervous for no apparent reason.

"I don't have all day, Beckett."

Kate took a deep breath. "I was just calling to let you know that I won't be in today," she announced.

"You've taken quite a few personal days since your sister arrived in town," Captain Gates remarked.

Kate bit back the sharp response about the amount of vacation leave she had backed up.

"Is there something I should know about?" Gates inquired, razor sharp as always.

Kate sighed. She couldn't begin to imagine what would happen if Gates found out the big news via Page 6 (or whatever grating and gratuitous press release she and Rick would have to give). It was time to bite the bullet. "I got engaged last night."

There was a pregnant pause on the other end of the line. Despite willing herself to stay calm, Kate could feel the beginnings of stress related sweat breaking on her brow.

"I see," Gates responded evenly.

"It was as much of a surprise to me as it was to you," Kate offered meekly, before mentally slapping herself. Why did she suddenly care so much about what her superior thought?

"Well, congratulations, I suppose."

"Thank you," Kate responded sincerely. She couldn't fathom why she was so relieved that Gates wasn't reaching down the phone and slapping her silly, the way Kate _knew_ she was capable of. She went to hang up the phone.

"And, Beckett?" Gates added loftily. "I don't want to see you in this Precinct until Monday," Gates informed her, her tone both steely and soft.

"Sir?" Kate questioned. "It's Wednesday."

"I'm aware of what day of the week it is, Detective Beckett."

A dial tone resounded in Kate's ear as Gates forcefully hung up the phone.

Kate stared at her phone for a few seconds, stunned. For a second there, it actually sounded like Gates could be happy for her and Rick. Kate locked her phone, before being distracted again by her pretty, shiny ring.

"Kate?" Rick called out urgently. "Kate!" he called again. He emerged from his bedroom, pulling on a pair of pyjama pants, his hair in disarray. Kate knelt up on the couch, wondering what the commotion was.

"You're still here," Rick breathed, relief evident in his tone. He flopped down next to her, before pulling her to his side in a crushing embrace.

"I was just calling Gates to tell her I wouldn't be in today," Kate informed him. "Where would I have gone?" She wondered, running a hand through his messy hair. Rick shrugged, before pressing a kiss to her temple. "I made coffee," she added, gesturing to the table.

He didn't even blink. Something was definitely up. "Rick?" she questioned, moving to curl closer to him. The faint stain of a blush on his cheeks, and the way he wouldn't meet her eye told her everything she needed to know. "Oh, Baby," she murmured, the endearment slipping out of her mouth before she could stop it. Generally she reserved pet names for family, but she found that the nickname didn't feel as sickly sweet as she usually found them when couples used them.

"You thought I'd run away," she articulated, placing a hand on his cheek, turning his face to look at her. She leant forward and bestowed a soft kiss on his downturned mouth, linking her arms over his shoulders. "I can't believe you thought you'd gotten rid of me that easily," she teased, nose nudging his cheek as she desperately tried to lighten the mood. He still had the same relieved but terrified look in his eyes.

"Hey, look at me," Kate ordered. She waited until she finally had his attention. "I have waited four years for this," she enunciated slowly. "I'm done with waiting. I'm done with giving you loaded looks, and hoping you'd stick around while I wasted time. I'm in this," she lifted her hands and cupped his cheeks. "Always," she informed him seriously. She could have cried when she saw the darkness leave his eyes.

"Really?" He asked, little boy wonder edging into his tone as his hands moved to span her waist. He really must have been terrified when he'd woken to an empty bed. Kate couldn't help but hate herself for giving him reason to question whether or not she'd be there in the morning.

"I'll say it in another language if it'll convince you." Kate grinned when she saw the curiosity light up on his face. "Postoyanno," (Always) she clarified for him.

"Are you going to teach me Russian?" Rick asked her.

Kate shrugged, before standing up and offering him her hand. "If you want me to," she responded. "But not here." She tugged on his hand, leading him back into the bedroom. She shed his shirt like a snake, before sliding between the disgustingly comfortable sheets.

She gave him her half smile as he followed suit, slipping into bed next to her and pulling her into a warm embrace. "This is how I always imagined the morning after my engagement would go," she mumbled, gently nipping at his collarbone. He lifted her hand, pressing a kiss to the knuckle above her ring.

"It is _so_ beautiful," she sighed.

"So are you," Rick rebutted, feathering kisses against her hairline.

"Be serious for a second, Castle," Kate ordered, a whiff of Detective Beckett colouring her words.

"I am," he answered. "I'm being entirely serious." He linked their hands so that Kate's left hand was facing upward. "When I met you, I met Detective Beckett," he explained, his finger lightly tracing the halo of stones on the ring. "Detective Beckett was like nobody I've ever met. Strong, brave," he paused to press a kiss to her neck, "Detective Beckett had a clarity about her that was like a beacon. It drew me in. It challenged me. Forced me to stand for something. To become a better writer, and a better man." He paused for a moment, and simply looked at Kate. She was enraptured by his story.

"Please, continue," she beseeched him softly.

"I think I loved Detective Beckett first. I loved her from the second that she hauled me into interrogation and refused to fall prey to my charms."

"You were attracted to me, you did not love me," She interjected.

"I'm telling the story," he admonished her gently, poking the tip of her nose. She playfully went cross eyed, and patiently waited for him to continue. "But as extraordinary as Detective Beckett was; and as honoured as I was that she didn't club me to death with her stapler, I realised there was a plot twist ahead. As amazing Detective Beckett is, she isn't the end of the story. Underneath Detective Beckett is this whole other woman," Rick gently thumbed the band of black diamonds. "She's warm. She's tender. She's bottomless; the more you look, the more you realise there's so much more to see. She took time out of her life to give my kid advice. Drank wine with my mother. She's Daddy's Little Girl. This extraordinary woman named Kate. A woman with a heart so deep I couldn't find the bottom if I tried. A woman who wanted nothing more than my happiness, even if me having my happiness caused her pain. Kate is a big sister, a loving daughter. She giggles. Detective Beckett protects Kate from the darkness the world puts forward. Kate and Detective Beckett may seem like polar opposites, but I've been privileged enough to be given the opportunity to realise that she's two sides of the same coin, and I love them both." His thumb brushed against the diamond at the centre of the ring, and he shot her a crooked grin.

Kate sniffled. "I always thought I needed somebody who took life as seriously as I do," Kate began. "I've always been so focussed. My Mom needed justice, what was there to laugh about?" She paused. "Mom would have loved you. She was always telling me not to take life so seriously, because nobody gets out of it alive. And she was right." Kate squeezed Rick's hand, the fingers of her right hand moving to caress his knuckles. "I need your light, and your goofiness." She stopped for a second, and groaned. "I can't get the words to sound right in English," she confessed. "Ty mayo solnishko" she purred.

Rick's brow furrowed. "A year of Spanish in high school just isn't cutting it," he mumbled.

Kate chewed her lip, ruminating on the best way to interpret what she meant. Screw it. She'd go for the simplest translation. "You are my sunshine," Kate supplied helpfully.

"Sunshine?" Rick asked.

Kate nodded. "You make all the clouds go away." She leaned towards him, giving him a long, luxurious kiss.

"What other Russian can you teach me?" Rick asked.

Kate quirked her eyebrow, before catching his earlobe with her teeth. "YA tebya lyublyu," she whispered.

Rick carefully repeated her words, stumbling over the pronunciation slightly. "What does it mean?" He questioned.

Kate's gentle half smile grew. "I love you." She slid her leg over his, deftly straddling his frame. "YA khochu zanyatʹsya s toboy lyubovʹyu" she murmured. She didn't wait for Rick to ask for a translation. "I want to make love to you," she whispered. Rick flipped her onto her back, her delighted squeals echoing through the empty loft.

* * *

Alexis twisted her hair into a ponytail, before walking out of the bathroom into the living area.

"That is it!" She declared, before marching over to the TV, flicking it off at the wall. "I am staging an intervention!"

"I was watching that!" Cassie complained.

"Yes, I'm aware that you were watching that. You've spent the last two days on the couch, watching _Alias_. I don't think you've moved," Alexis argued.

"Not true!" Cassie countered, aghast. "I had to get up to change the discs."

"Cassie, this is not a healthy way to deal with a break up," Alexis argued, sitting at Cassie's feet on the couch.

"I disagree," Cassie grumbled. "I haven't booked tickets to Brazil, even though I've heard its lovely at this time of year. I also haven't had meaningless hate sex with an attractive but probably inappropriate biker, and I haven't even cracked open that bottle of Jack that's been staring me down since I got home. I think we should focus on the positives here."

"How can you call sitting on the couch in your underwear for two days focussing on the positives?"

"Because no matter how much my life sucks, at least my mother wasn't a KGB agent ordered to marry my Dad, who then faked her own death and eventually shot me in the chest after I became a spy as the result of my father's brainwashing," Cassie pointed out.

"Oh my god, get up, and get your ass in the shower, now," Alexis ordered. "I'm not kidding, Cassie. You stink," Alexis tickled Cassie underneath the kneecap (a trick she'd learnt from Kate), and watched her jump up.

"Go wash your hair, and then pack a bag. We're getting out of the city."

Kate couldn't believe she was doing something so domestic as helping Rick make his bed. She was helping her fiancée make the bed. Her _fiancée._

"So she really said don't come in til Monday?" Castle confirmed.

"That is what she said," Kate replied, tucking the top sheet into a neat hospital corner.

"Do you think she has a brain tumour?" Castle asked seriously.

"I guess it's possible. Maybe she just thinks I'll be too distracted to concentrate on policing and forget to read someone their Miranda Rights or something."

Together, they shook out the duvet and fitted it over the bed. Rick immediately flopped onto the bed once the coverings were settled.

"We _just _made the bed!" Kate admonished him.

Rick just shrugged. "Let's head out to the Hamptons. Take a little time out before we have to head back to the real world," he suggested, tugging on Kate's arm and pulling her onto the bed.

Kate paused for a moment, before kissing him softly. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah," Kate smiled softly. She ran a hand through his hair. "I would love to go to the Hamptons with you."

* * *

Cassie flicked through her wardrobe, trying to decide what she should take on her roadtrip with Alexis. She'd thrown a few bikinis along with some underwear into her overnight bag, before pulling on her favourite crocheted two piece, pulling on a pair of shredded denim shorts and a white peasant style shirt she'd found in left in her hostel room in Croatia. Shrugging, she threw in several maxi dresses, flip-flops, and a pair of wedge heels that she could wear anywhere that had a serious dress code. On a whim, she tossed in a few more pairs of shorts and a shirt or two. Cassie dashed to the bathroom, quickly gathering her toiletries and scrunched some product into her hair, before dumping a hat on top. She walked back towards her bedroom and nearly dropped her makeup case.

"Jesus, Katie! Don't sneak up on me!" Cassie hissed, hand pressed on her chest. "What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be having some I just got engaged sexy times?"

"Do you always have to be that vulgar, Cassandra?" Kate sighed.

"It's all a part of my charm," Cassie shrugged. "You didn't answer my question."

"Rick and I are going to head to his house in the Hamptons for a couple of days. Gates forbad me for heading into the Precinct until Monday," Kate answered, heading toward her bedroom. She tugged an overnight bag from underneath her bed and began to neatly pack her things.

Cassie flopped onto the bed. "That's mighty interesting," Cassie commented, picking at a hangnail on her thumb.

"What makes you say that?" Kate asked as she folded a sundress and placed it in the bag.

"Alexis demanded that I pack a bag, because we're getting out of the city. I have a funny little feeling that she wants to head to the Hamptons as well." Cassie rolled her head to stare at Kate, upside down. "Apparently living vicariously through _Alias_ isn't a healthy way to deal with my break up."

"Probably not, no," Kate agreed as she rifled through her drawers, looking at bathing suits.

"Take both," Cassie ordered. "But now I'm going to ruin your sexy getaway."

Kate playfully shoved Cassie off the bed. "I'm sure it's a big house."

* * *

Cassie had steadfastly refused to drive in New York City traffic. She maintained that she hadn't driven since returning to the US of A, and there was no way that she was going to drive in one of the busiest cities in the world when she'd spent the last two years driving on the wrong side of the road.

They swapped drivers right before they pulled onto the highway. In seconds Cassie had flipped a switch and the soft top was down.

Cassie sighed happily, revelling in the sun beating down on her shoulders. "Oh, this is bliss."

"Says she who isn't lily white," Alexis mused, adjusting her large sunglasses, hoping that her lathering of sunscreen would protect her fair skin from the late morning sun.

"You can put the top up if you want to," Cassie replied.

Alexis looked over at Cassie. She was smiling for the first time in days. "I'll be fine for a little while," Alexis assured her.

"Sweet!" Cassie scanned the road ahead. Zero traffic. Brilliant. She tugged off the hat she'd swapped with a German tourist when in Madrid and dropped it on Alexis's head. "Alexis, hold the wheel a second!" Cassie ordered.

"What?" Alexis squeaked.

"Just do it!" Cassie quickly let go of the wheel, and Alexis grabbed it, demanding to know what Cassie was doing. Cassie adjusted her seatbelt so that the top strap was behind her shoulder, before tugging her shirt over her head. She leaned back into the seat, before reaching over and grabbing her hat back. She plunked it back on her head, grabbed the wheel from Alexis, before leaning over and flicking the stereo up, the tune of _Call Me Maybe_ blasting across the highway.

* * *

The house was gorgeous. It really was. Kate inspected the open plan setup and turned to her fiancé with a soft smile on her face. "I can see why you like to come out here to write. This place is beautiful," she told him sincerely.

He brushed a kiss on her cheekbone. "Thank you."

"You have no idea how pissed off I'm going to be if I find out that one of your ex-wives designed this place."

"Detective Beckett! Is that jealousy I detect in your tone?" Rick asked her teasingly, his hands coming to rest on her ribcage.

"You're right, I'm incredibly jealous that they were stupid enough to let you go," Kate purred, leaning in to nip at Rick's lower lip.

The silence of the moment was broken as strains of Taylor Swift's _We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together_ blasted up the street.

"Sounds like the kids are here to join us," Kate grumbled. She stole another kiss before separating herself from Rick's embrace.

Seconds later, the door swung open to reveal a messy haired Cassie and a pink cheeked Alexis.

"First family vay-cay! How exciting is this?" Cassie greeted them, her tone thick with forced excitement.

"Hey, Milaya," (Sweetie) Kate greeted her. She could see straight through the façade that Cassie had thrown up, and she knew that she'd have to get her little sister alone for a few minutes to break through the mask and talk to her.

"I'll show you up to your room, Cass," Alexis offered, linking arms with Cassie and pulling her towards the stairs.

* * *

Kate walked out onto the back deck, where Cassie sat on a lounge chair overlooking the ocean. Her iPod, a tattered copy of _To Kill A Mockingbird_ and a bottle of coconut oil sat on a wooden table next to her. Kate wordlessly handed her a beer.

"Cheers," Cassie murmured quietly, gripping the frosted neck of the bottle and taking a sip. Kate remained silent. She knew pressuring Cassie into talking was a bad idea. All she had to do was wait.

"I know what you're doing, Kate. I'm fine. Don't kill your newly engaged buzz stressing about me."

"Cassandra, you can be incredibly frustrating at times, you know that?" Kate pointed out, reaching out and snagging the coconut oil. She stripped off the cotton kaftan she was wearing over her bathing suit, and began to slather with the oil.

"And if you didn't waste your time worrying, you wouldn't have to be frustrated."

"Ne zastavlyay menya udaril tebya," (Do not make me slap you,) Kate threatened darkly. "I haven't always been there for you, Cassie. I know that and I'm _so_ sorry for it. But Lapochka, (sweetheart) I'm here now. I know you've had your heart broken. I know you thought she was the one, and I want to be able to look after you. It's okay to need somebody, you know."

"I've never had anybody to need," Cassie quietly admitted.

"You've got me," Kate informed her, reaching out to squeeze her hand. "You're never going to get rid of me."

"Spasibo," (Thank you) Cassie sighed. She reached out and grabbed Kate's left hand, inspecting the ring carefully. "Castle did good," She eventually decided.

"He called Paula during the drive here," Kate mentioned. "Apparently she wants to get a statement out to the press, soon. When she found out we're here on vacation with you and Alexis, she booked a photographer to come out in two days time."

"This marrying your favourite author thing isn't all it's cracked up to be?" Cassie asked, taking a swig of her beer.

Kate sighed, carefully planning her words. "I don't like that I have to justify my life to the press. I really don't. But I can't pretend I didn't know it was going to be a reality of my relationship. And I'm _really _not looking forward to the rumours that are sure to fly around with how quickly we got engaged."

"Who says rumours are going to fly around? You could get married two years from now."

"I don't want to wait," Kate admitted. She bit her lip, blushing slightly. "We tiptoed around each other for four years. I don't want to waste another four on that crap."

"Katherine Beckett!" Cassie gasped. "You are evolving as a human being! I am so proud of you!"

"Cassie," Kate uttered quietly. "Cassie, I want you to be my maid of honour."

Cassie dumped her beer on the table and launched herself onto Kate's deckchair. She flung her arms around her sister, the combination of her momentum and Kate's instinct to curl into a ball to prevent injury led to them becoming an oily pile of giggling limbs.

"Are you sure?" Cassie asked.

"Nothing would make me happier," Kate replied.

"I could do this for you," Cassie mused.

"Do what?"

"Plan your wedding," Cassie answered. "If you wanted to be, you could be married by the end of the summer." Cassie watched as Kate bit her lip. "Too fast?" Cassie asked.

Kate shook her head. "I don't think so," Kate deliberated. "Rick and Alexis went out to buy groceries. I think we need to talk to them as soon as they get back."

* * *

It had only taken a few hours in the sun, but Kate and Cassie were already noticeably tanner than when they'd arrived. Alexis's cheeks were slightly pink, her freckles standing out more than they usually did.

Cassie had a stack of notepaper and a pen, as well as her iPad open on the outdoor table setting that sat on the balcony of the first level of the house.

"We're really doing this," Rick mused.

"We really are," Kate replied, giving him a warm smile.

Alexis walked out onto patio, a plate of sliced watermelon in her hands. "You are fearless, Kate. I can't believe you're diving into this so fast," Alexis commented.

"Neither can I," Kate agreed. She wondered if it would be all right to reach out and squeeze Alexis's hand the way she did to Cassie.

"So, step one. You gotta pick a date," Cassie pointed out, all business as she flicked open her calendar app.

"The second last weekend in August," Kate said definitively. She stood and perched herself on the arm of Rick's chair. "I'm tired of waiting," She whispered to him. Screw propriety, she leaned over and kissed his temple.

"Okay, the second last weekend in August it is," Cassie declared, scrawling the date at the top of her notes. "Are we doing an engagement party?" Cassie asked, reaching out and grabbing a slice of watermelon.

Rick looked up at Kate. "I don't think so," He answered. "I've got a book tour coming up that will have me out of town over a few weekends in the coming months. I doubt we could find a weekend that would work that wasn't the weekend before the wedding."

Cassie nodded, scrawling another note on her page.

"I want to get married at St. Michael's," Kate declared.

Rick frowned; he didn't know that the Becketts were particularly religious. He couldn't recall a time where he'd heard Kate say anything about believing in a higher power.

"Our family is Russian Catholic," Kate explained. "St. Michael's is the church my parents were married in."

"I'll call them right away," Cassie volunteered. Kate nodded her thanks.

"Obviously you'll need to look for dresses and such," Alexis hedged in.

"I'll have to call Lanie and we can find a date that works for the four of us," Kate replied.

"The four of us?" Alexis asked.

"You're kidding, right, Alexis?" Kate asked. Alexis just shrugged.

"I want you in my bridal party, Lex," Kate told her, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Really?" Alexis questioned hesitantly.

"Of course," Kate replied. "Which means you need to come shopping. The dress is going to need to look good on all three of you."

"Alright," Alexis agreed.

"The last thing we need is a reception venue. Meaning the two of you need to need to figure out a guest list so we know how big a location we're looking at. I can't do anything with invites until then," Cassie declared, capping her pen. Cassie shot a grin at her ragtag family. "I'm off to the beach!"

* * *

Kate hesitated at the door. She was a cop, for god's sake, and she was freaking out about talking to a college student. She knocked on the door.

"Hey Alexis," Kate greeted her, leaning against the doorframe. "Can we talk for a second?"

Alexis neatly slid a bookmark into the pages of the novel she was reading. "Of course," she replied.

Kate trotted into the room, perching herself on the edge of the bed. "I know this is probably weird for you. Your Dad and I aren't wasting any time, but I'm not going to insult your intelligence and pretend I feel bad for that," Kate began. "But I do know that I'm incredibly happy right now. I also know that I probably haven't considered your feelings as much as I should have. I can't imagine you're thrilled about stepmother number two."

"Kate, stop," Alexis requested. "I know that you've been in love with my Dad for a really long time. I also know that you both did some really shitty things in a misguided attempt to protect each other because you love each other so much," Alexis paused for a second. "My Dad has always been really good about protecting me from the women in his life. I guess he always knew that some women would think nothing of using me to get to him. It was fine with me that he was like that. Let's face it, the kind of woman who would use me to get to my Dad is the kind of woman who probably isn't all that interested in the ups and downs of being a teenage girl," Alexis surmised.

"He never really protected me when it came to you. He let me get to know you myself, and he trusted that you wouldn't do me wrong. I was really mad for a long time when I saw how caught up he was over you."

"What changed your mind?" Kate dared to ask.

A smile cracked on Alexis's mouth. "Cassie did."

"Of course she did."

"She convinced me the reason that you were keeping Dad at arm's length was because you were scared that you were too broken to love him like he deserved."

"Unfortunately, Cassie is generally right when it comes to these things," Kate admitted.

"You were willing to give up everything that made you, you to have my Dad. You were so brave, quitting your job like that. Heck, you were so brave, being strong enough to know what you wanted and what you needed were two different things," Alexis murmured. "When I realised that, I realised what a bitch I'd been to you. Then I realised that you probably didn't like me very much, and you probably had a pretty good reason not to…"

"Alexis, stop right there," Kate ordered, cutting her off sharply. "I like you very much. In fact, you were the very first thing that convinced me that your father may not be a conceited jackass," Kate reached out hesitantly, grasping Alexis's hand. "I'm not going to try and be a replacement Mom to you. I'm not going to try and force a relationship with you, just because I'm marrying your Dad. But I don't want you to think that I don't care about you. And I _really_ don't want you to think that the only reason I care is because I think I should because of your Dad. Alexis," Kate brushed a strand of red hair off her face. "I think you are an incredible young woman. I'm going to be really proud to be able to call myself your stepmother and I care very much about you."

Alexis shot Kate a watery smile. "Thank you," she rasped. "For being honest with me. And for not treating me like an idiot."

"You're too smart to be treated like an idiot, kid," Kate teased.

Alexis hesitated, indecisive. She decided to trust her instincts. She leaned forward and pulled Kate into a hug. "I think you're going to be my favourite stepmother," She confessed.

Kate chuckled, squeezing Alexis tightly. "I'm glad."

* * *

Alexis took charge of the shopping trip. Paula had insisted that Kate be dressed up in at least a cocktail dress for the photos that would be going along with the press release about the engagement, and "preferably something tight, so we can make it clear you're not in the family way."

"Katie, did you tell Dad about the engagement?" Cassie asked as they picked through dresses in a tiny boutique.

"Of course!" Kate replied. "He's totally thrilled. Expects grandbabies to spoil within a year."

"Don't I count?" Alexis asked innocently.

"Of course you do," Kate answered easily. "But you'd look a little ridiculous in the onesie that both Cassie and I wore when we were three months old."

After the boutique failed to yield any results, Cassie suggested they stop off at a café, insisting she needed a strawberry and kiwi smoothie ASAP.

Alexis opened her emails up on her phone, before gasping loudly.

"What's wrong?" Cassie asked through a mouthful of frozen fruit juice.

"I just got an email from Columbia," Alexis answered. "Apparently one of the biggest dorms on campus has been discovered to have termites. The entire thing is going to be unliveable for at least a semester. Administration has decided that any student who has family living within a reasonable distance to the college is now lowest priority for student housing. They're basically telling me that there's no way that I'm going to be able to live on campus in my freshman year," Alexis interpreted.

"Aw, c'mon Lexi, it isn't that bad, is it?" Cassie asked, looking at Alexis's glum face.

"I chose Columbia so I wouldn't have to be quite so far away from home. I didn't mean I still wanted to live there," Alexis groaned. "I love my Dad, I do, but there is just no way I can live there and be a college student!"

"You know, there is a solution to all of this," Cassie hinted. She looked over at Kate, who gave an encouraging nod. "Alexis Harper Castle, would you like to move in with me?"

"Are you kidding?"

"Not even a little bit," Cassie replied. "Kate isn't going to be living with me much longer, and there is no way I can afford the rent on that place on my own, especially now that I'll be at college myself."

"You don't want to live on campus?" Alexis asked.

"Hell, no!" Cassie hissed. "I have done my time living with weird strangers, thank you very much," she declared. "Seriously, Lex. It would be great. You'd be living with another freshman, but at least this way, you know she doesn't eat her own toenails, or sell cones out of her window."

"Are you sure?"

"Alexis, I will even let you have the big bedroom."

"Okay," Alexis agreed.

Cassie squealed. "Oh, this is going to be so much fun!" She quickly drained her drink. "And we have shopping to do! Let's move!"

* * *

They came along to a tiny boutique on the corner of two streets. Kate was rapidly losing patience. She shrugged before striding through the door, determined that this would be the store she'd find a damn dress for this damn photo shoot.

"Hello, ladies. Can I help you with anything today?" the shop assistant asked.

"Yeah, actually, you can. My stepmom is going to have some photos taken with my Dad, and we need something appropriate for her to wear," Alexis replied, trotting after the shop assistant, describing the situation.

Cassie flipped through the racks, before pausing. "Katya, Vam nuzhno priyekhatʹ syuda pryamo seychas!" (You need to come here right now!)

Kate approached Cassie, before inspecting the dress Cassie was admiring. "Cassie…" she trailed off.

"Kate, just try it on," Cassie implored. She gave Kate a wide-eyed expression, fluttering her eyelashes slightly before Kate sighed and gave in. She plucked up the hanger, striding towards the fitting rooms.

Kate stepped out of the fitting room, biting her lip as she made eye contact with her sister and soon to be stepdaughter.

"Oh my gosh," Alexis breathed.

"Katya, it is perfect," Cassie sighed.

Kate admired her reflection in the four-way mirror. The dress was divine. It was clearly vintage; though it had gone through some modifications in order to keep the dress classic, but still current.

"It's rare that you'll find a dress like that from the 1940s," the shop assistant piped up. "Silk was scarce because of the war, so most women simply didn't have a dress like that. I found it, and made a few alterations. The biggest one was taking off the sleeves, and changing the neckline."

It was in mint condition. The neckline of the dress flattered Kate's slim frame, and covered the scars on her chest perfectly. The halter neck was made out of the same delicate gossamer that flowed over the skirt of the dress, billowing out into a gentle train.

"We're looking for a dress for the photo shoot, remember," Kate pointed out.

"Screw that," Cassie dismissed. "Katyusha, we just found your wedding dress."

* * *

**Pictures of Kate's dress and ring can be found on my tumblr (brookemopolitan dot tumblr dot com)**

**Cookies'n'cream ice cream in exchange for reviews :)**

**Two chapters to go!**


	19. Chapter 19

**I cannot believe this is the second last chapter. Delay courtesy of the most stressful period of my working life :) (Seriously... work has been NUTS lately)**

**Enjoy my crazy take on a girl's last night of freedom. **

**As usual, many thanks to Tadpole24 :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't think AMW has stress related ulcers because of teaching drama**

* * *

Swapping the living arrangements of two different apartments was surprisingly easy. It had involved roping in the boys from the band, as well as Ryan and Espo, a hired truck and a day's work to move Alexis from the Castle loft, and vice versa with Kate's things. Cassie's boys had a gig they had to attend to and Kate's boys had been suckered into another double date that Jenny had promised to behave at.

"This is going to be a little weird, right?" Cassie mused to Kate from where she sat on the floor, her head resting against Kate's knee. She nodded over to Alexis, who was sitting with her Dad, listening to him with more rapt attention than she normally did as they set up Castle's poker table.

"I think so. Alexis has been ready to leave the nest for a while now, but now that it's actually happening, I think she's a little nervous. So be gentle for the first couple of days," Kate replied.

Cassie pondered her words. "It's gonna be weird not having you a few steps away. If you get suckered into a case, I may forget what you look like," Cassie pondered.

Kate shoved Cassie's head gently. "I know you way too well, brat. You won't let it happen. If you think we've gone too long not seeing each other, you'll bust into the Precinct and drag me out."

"Accurate," Cassie agreed. She stuck her tongue out at Kate. "I won't miss you shoving your cold toes on me in the middle of the night, though!"

"Yeah, well… I won't miss you getting home from work in the middle of the night, stomping around the hardwood floor apartment in boots!" Kate shot back.

"Because you never, ever woke me up with bodies dropping at all hours of the day and night."

"I guess it's a good thing I'm leaving then," Kate snapped.

"It is," Cassie growled in agreement. Her snarky silence lasted about thirty seconds. "You can't move Katie! I'm going to miss you too much!"

Kate looked down at Cassie who was clinging to her leg, chin resting atop her knee. "Cassie, you have to let me leave the nest sometime. How else am I going to grow and become a whole human being?"

"Yeah, but now you're going to forget you even have a little sister, and I'll never see you, and that will just suck. You totally don't need to grow as a person. You can live with me forever, and you'll never have to worry about the toilet seat not being left down."

Kate wove her fingers into Cassie's hair, pressing gently against her scalp. "Cass, listen to me. It isn't going happen. We are going to meet for coffee at least once a week and I'm sure we'll end up talking most days. This is not going to be like when I was in the Academy."

"I hope not," Cassie admitted.

"Hey! I mean it. We're going to be fine. YA obeshchayu," (I promise), Kate swore.

Cassie nodded seriously, green eyes wide. "Okay," she agreed, finally. She looked over at the poker table that had been set. "Oh, c'mon Katie! Do what you like when we're gone, but you do not need to set up for strip poker when Lexi and I are still here!"

Kate raised an eyebrow. "Are you serious, Cassie? Do you have to be so…" she trailed off and made a disgusted noise.

"Hard not to when I'm seeing a poker table get set up on the first night of you living with your fiancé! What am I supposed to think?"

"Oh, Cassie, relax!" Alexis chided. "It's Mystery Writers Poker Night."

"You say that like it's a thing and I should know what that means."

"Whenever the big boys of mystery are in town, Dad has them over to play poker. Exactly what it sounds like," Alexis explained, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Right. Of course. How silly of me not to realise that James Patterson and co are regular household visitors. Lex, you do realise that you have a slightly skewed perspective on normal, right?"

"They're just people, Cassie. They're normal guys who do their jobs well."

"I'd like to interject and point out that they're not all men, either. Whenever Tempe is in New York, she'll come and play a couple of rounds with us. Usually wipes the floor with us, too."

Cassie sat up straighter, eyes almost bugging out of her head. "I beg your pardon. Did you just inform me that you know Temperance _Brennan_?" Cassie demanded.

"Is that a big deal?" Castle asked, slightly taken aback by Cassie's reaction.

"Ah, _yeah!_" Cassie gushed. "I have to take forensic anthropology classes, remember? She's like, a total freaking _rockstar_! I seriously considered moving to DC so I could go to her guest lectures at American University. I'm freaking out, here. Is she coming to the wedding?" Cassie gushed, without thinking. She froze, remembering the news report from a few weeks ago, stating that Temperance Brennan was a wanted fugitive.

"There's no way that Tempe did what they're saying she did. There's no way," Castle swore, face darkening. "I'm sure she'll be cleared and I hope that it's in time for the wedding. If you promise to behave yourself, I'll even introduce you," Castle ribbed, his tone severely lacking its usual teasing lilt. Cassie's cheeky reply was cut off by a knock at the door.

"I suppose you can come visit me, if you like," Cassie allowed, barely restraining her grin. She looked over to where Castle was leading a younger guy into the loft. "Alex, you remember my daughter, Alexis. I'm sure you also remember Kate," Castle rattled off, nodding to each woman.

"Don't worry about me, Castle, it's cool," Cassie interjected, her cadence teasing as she scooted up onto the couch.

"Well, if you hadn't interrupted me, I would have been able to introduce you properly. Alex Conrad, please, meet Cassandra Beckett. Alex is a fellow mystery writer, recently returned from a research stint in South Africa," Castle explained gallantly. "Cassie is Kate's younger sister. She's about to start studying at NYU, and she's in the bridal party with you."

Cassie stood up, sticking out her hand to shake Alex's. "Hoe gaan dit?" (How are you), she queried, a sparkle in her eye.

Alex shook her hand in response, slightly stunned. "Goed, dankie," he responded.

"And that is exactly how far my Afrikaans goes in polite society, unless you want to hear me curse your mother's hairy back?"

"I'm surprised you speak that much. Mine isn't much better," Alex confessed.

"I had a South African workmate when I was in Australia," Cassie explained. "What brings you all the way over here tonight?"

"I always try and get to poker night when I'm in the Big Apple, even if they do give me shit for being the baby," Alex explained.

"What a tough burden for you to bear," Cassie soothed, her sympathy slightly tongue-in-cheek. "I'm sure you deal with it as best you can."

"I get through it. I guess I'll just remind them that they were passed over for best man duty for the third time."

Cassie raised an eyebrow. "Ahh, you're the elusive best man," she purred. "Maid of honour," she identified herself. "Hope you've got your dancing shoes ready for the wedding. And we'll have to compare notes as to who throws the best bachelor party," Cassie looked over at her brother in law to be. "Our night is totally going to be better than yours, just saying."

"I doubt that," he retorted.

"Is this the part where you give me a list of rules about all that we can and can't do? Don't worry, a strip club is so cliché."

"And gross," Kate interjected.

"Exactly. Besides, bridal party tattoos are so much more extreme," Cassie added, tongue between her teeth.

"You are not branding my daughter," Castle growled.

"It is _so_ happening," Cassie countered.

"Oh come on, Dad. It's not like they're really permanent, with laser therapy and all," Alexis added, stifling a giggle when she watched the blood drain from her Dad's face.

"I feel like I'm missing something here," Alex interrupted.

"Cassie has a few million tattoos," Kate explained. "She's running out of space to put them."

"Which is why you shouldn't be getting anymore," Castle exclaimed.

"Are you really telling me that you don't want to come and get a tattoo with me? We could get matching clouds for Derrick Storm. Book dedication tattoos have to be the most hardcore. Mine totally hurt the most," Cassie shot back.

"Because it was a book dedication?" Alex asked.

"Nah," Cassie shrugged, "Because it;s on my ribcage," she answered, bunching up the cotton of her shirt to expose the messily artistic scrawling on the right side of her chest.

"Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure," Alex read out. "Harry Potter nerd?"

Cassie nodded, smoothing out her shirt. "Since I was nine years old." She shot him a charming grin. Behind Alex's head, Kate and Alexis exchanged looks that could only be described as scheming.

"Do you want to head off soon?" Alexis asked Cassie. "I want to get some of my stuff unpacked tonight," she added, fluttering her eyelashes, her tone saccharine.

"I'm coming, too," Kate added quickly, false innocence ringing from her tone. "There is no way I'm sticking around here for Mystery Writers Poker Night," she defended herself. "There is some stuff between writer and muse that should remain a mystery."

"If you open a few boxes, I can't see why you couldn't come visit our humble abode," Alexis replied gallantly.

Cassie shot them both a death glare. "It was really nice to meet you, Alex. You should get my number off Castle. I'm sure we have some important wedding related stuff to talk about," She looked over at Castle. "I swear I'm not going to corrupt your only baby _too_ much," she added with a wink.

"Good night, Cassie," Castle droned, before pulling Alexis into a tight hug.

Alexis and Kate shared knowing looks as they strode to the elevators. Cassie steadfastly ignored them for as long as she could manage. She didn't even last the entire ride to the ground floor. "For the record, I hate you both."

* * *

"Cassie! Are you going to come help, or not?" Kate called out over the music.

Cassie strutted into Alexis's new room, clad in a tee shirt, a pair of red and white polka dotted panties and chunky brown heels. She was holding a tub of peach sorbet. "You know, I was all excited about helping settle you in, Lex, but then you decided to team up with Dr. Evil there, and now I think I'm going to settle down here and watch instead."

"Get used to this. She does it a lot," Kate deadpanned, neatly placing hardback books onto a shelf.

"Not wear pants? Or viciously overreact to everything?" Alexis asked cheerfully.

"Both, actually. She's the resident drama queen and she does the housework pretty much dressed like that," Kate answered.

"I can deal with drama queens. The pants thing I can work on."

Cassie leaned back on her elbows, the spoon in the tub perilously close to falling out of the tub and splattering melted sorbet on the hardwood floor. "I'm finding this very amusing," she commented.

"And what are you finding amusing, Cassie?" Kate humoured her.

"The two of you. The pair of you are SO uncertain about how the other person feels about them and yet you have no problems in joining powers for evil and ganging up on me."

"How is this any different to what you did to me? Don't think I didn't know the two of you were scheming with Lanie. I'm a detective, remember?" Kate drawled.

"That was different. It was for your own good!" Cassie defended herself, waving the spoon dramatically. "What are you complaining about? You're getting married in three weeks time,"

"And if you don't fight us, maybe you'll find yourself married, too," Alexis piped up, neatly folding shirts before placing them in her drawers.

"Yeah, except I've only got a fifty-fifty shot at actually getting married," Cassie pointed out. "And even if I end up with that shot, I won't. Not until every American can marry whoever they want to."

Kate shot Cassie a fond grin. She'd been a crusader since she'd been able to talk. "Don't think you've distracted us. Start talking, brat."

Cassie sighed dramatically, dumping the carton on Alexis's bedside table. "He's cute, alright," she admitted, desperately hoping her tone was nonchalant.

"How cute?" Alexis queried.

Cassie groaned, flopping back onto the bed and covering her face with a pillow. "Really, really cute," she confessed.

"We didn't notice," Kate teased.

"Oh, shut up, Katie!"

"So, he's cute," Alexis coaxed.

"Yeah," Cassie agreed. "Cute enough not to consider having a one night stand with."

"Oh, but you had no problems with flashing him your tattoos!" Kate retorted.

"It's not like I showed him the one on my ass," Cassie retorted. "Besides, aren't the best man and the maid of honour supposed to have a fling?"

Kate looked over at Alexis's slightly stunned face. "Don't worry, Alexis. She doesn't have a tattoo on her ass," she reassured.

"Are you sure?"

* * *

"Cassie, I do not understand why we have to be at the hotel so early!" Kate complained, stripping her clothes off as she was ordered to by the scary sounding Swedish girl at the door of the day spa.

"Don't question. Just go with it," Lanie answered, her tone somehow both soothing and firm.

"I told you, Katenka. I couldn't narrow down what would be the best bachelorette party activity, so I figured we'd just do them all. Now go enjoy your massage!" Cassie ordered.

"And you're SURE this will be off in time for the wedding?" Kate asked for the third time.

"Yes, I'm absolutely sure," the Henna artist reassured.

Kate chewed on her lip, before extending her right hand. She'd already had designs painted on her left foot, and Cassie's coaxing (and the generous cocktail she'd mixed for her) had encouraged Kate to have Henna designs put on her hands and lower arms (the tradition involving Rick's name being incorporated into the design to find that Lanie had sneakily mentioned had helped).

Alexis inspected her stained leg, having already scratched off the thick layer of paint. "Exactly how much do you think Dad will flip out if I send him a picture of this?" She mused to Cassie.

Cassie turned from where she was inspecting the still slightly wet design that spread over her shoulder, upper back and chest. "Please can we do it?" She begged. Cassie whipped out her cell phone, before shoving one of her extra potent cocktails into Alexis's hand. "Camera loves you, darling!" Cassie cooed, snapping a shot and texting it to Castle.

"Girls, I gotta say, I'm a little disappointed," Kate commented. "I thought this was going to be some kind of crazy ass, I could lose my badge for the shenanigans bachelorette party."

Cassie raised an eyebrow. Challenge accepted. "Oh, Katya," she sighed. "My dear, sweet Katya. You have no idea the shenanigans I have planned for your last night of freedom. Enjoy the downtime while you can."

* * *

"No. No. No. _NO!"_

"Lanie, you can say no as many different ways as you like. You're wearing the accessories. I'm pulling rank, here. As maid of horror, I command it," Cassie replied, draping Lanie in a feather boa and plunking a plastic tiara on her head. "Besides, we are more likely to get free drinks this way."

"Well, you guys are," Alexis agreed, adjusting her tiara so that her red curls spilt from underneath it. "Cassie, I think we have to have a conversation about your shorts. They're _very_ short," Alexis articulated, looking down her nose at Cassie's bare legs.

"But they're not!" Cassie pouted, tugging at the hemline of her black leather shorts. "My vagina is here," she gestured, "and the bottom of the shorts are here. Notice the gap! My legs are just really long, and they make everything look short. So you can spare me the look, Principal Castle."

"She's right," Kate defended.

"Thank you!" Cassie called out. "I can't believe nobody noticed my awesome shoes," she whined. Once you got past the long expanse of golden leg, a pair of red high heels that had been carefully decoupaged with old comic book strips sat on Cassie's feet.

"Very cool," Lanie humoured Cassie, as she strapped on her own black heels. The bridesmaids had agreed on wearing all black outfits, and had individually bullied Kate into picking a coloured dress for the evening.

"Okay, I think we might be ready to go," Kate announced, picking up her silver clutch as she strutted out of the bathroom.

"Kate, you are going to cause a riot tonight. You look _hot_!" Lanie crowed, eyeing Kate's sinfully short and tight red dress appreciatively.

"You look amazing, Katie, but you're not ready yet," Cassie added. She grabbed the veil she'd fashioned for Kate, plunking it on her head and pinning it in place before she could protest. Cassie picked up the almost empty champagne bottle, draining it in a mouthful. "Okay, now we're ready. Let's go."

* * *

Kate raised an eyebrow when the cab pulled up at a small warehouse in Brooklyn. "Are you taking me here to murder me? Because I'm pretty sure a few people will notice if I'm gone."

"I'm sure I could find a way to rule your dismemberment an accident. Could you just trust us?" Lanie appeased.

"Alright, alright. What are we doing here, anyway?" Kate asked.

"Dinner, for one. And I have a treat planned," Cassie explained. "After that, we hit the town." She looked over at Alexis. "My plans to host the bachelorette party hinged fairly heavily in gaining access to the X-Jet. So when it comes to getting into a club…"

"I'm Meredith Kingston and Richard Castle's daughter. I think I'll be okay. I'll just have a diva spit otherwise," Alexis shrugged.

Cassie's jaw dropped. "This whole sweet and innocent thing is just an act, isn't it?"

"I wanted to see if the "my parents are famous" thing would actually work," Alexis said innocently. "They also said not to worry about paying at the bar."

"Alexis!" Cassie gasped as they walked through the doors of the warehouse. Alexis just shot her a cheeky grin.

"Cass, this is Jenny," Kate called out. Cassie came over and greeted Ryan's diminutive wife, taking an instant liking to her. She linked arms with Kate, before they were both dragged over to greet several of their cousins (Cassie enduring squeals in both Russian and English that generally amounted to "I haven't seen you in forever! You look so different!" or if she was really lucky "You look just like your Mom!").

Eventually, Cassie was saved when the owner of the warehouse (that looked as if they'd stepped into Dita Von Teese's dressing room) approached her. They had a brief conversation, before she led Cassie up to a stage to greet everyone. Cassie eyed the 50s style microphone with a grin. "Good evening ladies!" She called out.

"I'm sure you all know me, but for those who may not, I'm Cassie, and I'm the Maid of Honour slash coordinator of shenanigans for this evening. Just so you delectable divas know what's going down this evening, I'll give you a brief run down," Cassie flipped her fading pink curls (her hair was going to be redyed to match the dress three days before the wedding), and cleared her throat.

"We're going to start out with canapés3 and a few little ice breakers led by my fellow bridesmaid, the delicious Dr. Lanie Parish. This is your time to carb load for the evening ahead, ladies. After that, we're going to have a lesson in the language of burlesque courtesy of Ms Dahlia Belle. After that, if you're still standing, we dance until the sun comes up. Sound good?" Cassie winked when the girls all cheered, Kate looking absolutely delighted. "I always say that the best way to start the night is with a Screaming Orgasm. What do you say, ladies?" More cheers echoed around the space, and a few waitresses clad in bustles and stay up stockings walked around carrying trays of shots.

Cassie picked one up, holding it aloft. "Za krasavitsu nevestu!" (To the beautiful bride!) She crowed, before tapping glasses with the bridal party, and swallowing it.

"That's actually kinda nice," Alexis commented, setting the shotglass down on a table. Cassie raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, one time Paige and I broke into her stepdad's liquor cabinet. All he had was gin and it was disgusting."

"That's because gin smells and tastes like hairspray. Stick with me, Little One. I'll keep you safe."

* * *

They'd already forced Kate to drink out of a penis shaped straw. They were loose, giggly and punch drunk, and had learnt a dance number that involved gloves, giant feather fans and a Christina Aguilera song with filthy lyrics.

They made their way down the busy streets of the East Village, enjoying the occasional honk and appreciative leer. Cassie waggled her eyebrows at Kate. "My sister is getting married!" She hollered at the cars stopped at a set of traffic lights. She cheered and curtseyed when a Jeep full of frat boys honked their horn loudly, and a cabful of girls in their mid-twenties squealed congratulations.

Cassie linked arms with Kate. "This is the only time I get to do this, Katie. Don't think I'm not going to love embarrassing the shit out of you."

"It's fine. Like, whatever. It's not as embarrassing at the fact that my wedding is going to be in a fucking magazine." Kate grumbled. "This is supposed to be our perfect day, and I have to share it with People magazine."

Cassie thought back to the conversation that Kate had regurgitated to her. Paula had basically advised that they should sell a few shots of the wedding, (the money generated to be donated to a charity supporting the widows of cops, ad shots mostly from the reception that was being held at Coney Island- the press would go nuts for the slightly kooky vintage crime novel wedding they were having) and give a statement, and they'd be home free. Paula insisted that they were better off giving information to the press every now and again. By remaining secretive, that's when they would become sought after and their privacy would be invaded.

"It'll be fine. If we see one photographer tonight, I'll moon them, thereby taking any attention off you. I've got your back, Katya."

"Well, I hope that we don't see a pap, then."

Cassie called for Lanie, Alexis and Jenny to stop before they walked up to the club's entry (her cousins had all decided to call it a night and Cassie couldn't be more grateful. Nosy bitches). "Now, ladies, here's the deal. In my purse, I have a series of dares. We'll take turns drawing them out at random. You don't want to do the dare, you do a shot instead. We clear?" At everyone's nod, Cassie grinned. "Great!" she quickly ran a hand through her hair, mussing up the locks slightly, before slicking on some lipgloss and walking up to the bouncer. She fluttered her eyelashes and pouted as she chatted with him, and in minutes, they were guided into their own exclusive pod. Moments later, a large jug of sangria and glasses were deposited on their table.

"Nice work, Cassie!" Jenny crowed. Cassie had taken an instant liking to the petite blonde, sensing that they shared the same mischievous streak.

"You should never, ever doubt the power of a wink and a smile," Cassie teased, deftly pouring glasses of sangria.

"I would like to propose a toast," Kate announced loftily. Clearly the bottle of champagne, and several cocktails and shots with dirty names Cassie had forced down her throat were starting to have an effect. "I'm so glad you guys are here, celebrating the fact that I am actually getting married. Like, how crazy is that? And you guys are here, and you all mean the world to me, and this is so awesome."

Cassie quickly cut Kate off (she was a notorious drunken rambler). "And we're going to be the last ones standing! Party til the sun comes up!" with that, they tapped glasses, and Cassie drained her glass in a mouthful, before nibbling on the fruit in her cup (which she had learnt the hard way in Madrid, does not replace food when you haven't eaten all day). "Let's dance!"

Cassie grabbed both Alexis and Kate, dragging them both towards the dance floor. In seconds, Cassie had whipped her phone out, videoing them as they moved to the music.

Three songs later, Jenny's face was nothing short of impish. "We need a dare!" She squealed over the music.

Lanie's grin was devilish. She'd been the instigator of most of the more out there dares. "The youngest goes first!" She added.

Alexis sighed heavily, before reaching into Cassie's clutch, and drawing out a dare. She opened up the slip of paper and skimmed what it said. Her jaw dropped. "I can't do this!" She gasped.

"Well then I guess it's time we get you a Cock Sucking Cowboy," Cassie retorted.

Alexis's eyes widened. She sighed heavily. "Fine!" She took a look around the room, before spotting someone. She marched up to a younger looking guy on the dancefloor. The girls watched her have a brief conversation with him, then finally lean forward to bite off a button of his shirt. Alexis gave him a wink, before sauntering back over to the girls. "Usually, I'd make a guy buy me dinner first, but here you go… I got a guy's shirt button without using my hands."

Cassie snapped a picture of Alexis holding up the slip of paper with the dare on it and the button. "Very impressed, Alexis," she stated loudly.

* * *

The night had been the kind to go down in history. Lanie was carrying a pair of boxers she'd bargained for like a badge of honour, Jenny clinging to her, the veil made from toilet paper (she'd insisted she didn't want to be left out) slightly askew. Kate and Alexis had seemed to have sorted out any rift that was between them, from the way that Kate was drunkenly teaching her Russian curse words.

The lock to their hotel room door presented several challenges, but they eventually got into the room, with enough time to order eight servings of nachos off the room service menu (a whole new challenge, with the fun discovery that Cassie lost the ability to speak English when intoxicated).

Cassie tugged off her heels and flopped into bed next to Kate. "Katya, are you happy?" She asked sleepily.

"You bet, milochka. I've never been this happy before," Kate yawned, lazily playing with Cassie's knotty hair.

"Good."

* * *

**One more chapter guys! How intense is that? And I'm determined it will be up before the premiere of SEASON FOUR (holy shit! the spoilers, the spoilers! I'm dead. DEAD)**

**If you haven't said hey yet, now would be a really cool time. Reviews totally help motivate me :)**

**ANNNDD... I have a slightly cracky, out there idea for a sequel, that I'm not sure I'd be forgiven for writing. With this in mind, if you're curious... PM me for details, or to convince me to write it.**

**Reviews are love, guys. Sweet, Casketty love.**


	20. Chapter 20

**Oh my gosh, you guys. This is it. This is the very last chapter of Cassie. Somebody hold me. Yay for me finishing my very first multichap fic in Castle land :D**

**Also- Anyone else got craaaazy post After the Storm feels? I think my 5.01 hangover is worse than my Always hangover :|**

**A huge, massive, giagantic thank you to Tadpole24. This fic would honestly be a voice in my head if it hadn't been for her encouragement. She is the best beta an author could ask for.**

**Disclaimer: I am not Andrew Marlowe. Clearly. If I were, there would be no cases, ever, and just meaningless fluff.**

* * *

She might have moved house, but one thing had remained the same… her house was alive with sound. It was either the steady tap-tap-tap of a keyboard and the accompanying murmurs it took to bring a story to life, or the reciting of a lengthy monologue written by Chekov. Here, her roommate either blasted music until the walls shook, or strummed a guitar until her fingers bled.

Alexis dropped her keys into the decorative bowl near the door and neatly hung her bag on the hatstand. "You really have a problem with wearing clothes, don't you?"

Cassie leaned over and paused the 1940s track she'd been blasting (and singing along to) before stepping away from the canvas she was working on to appraise her work. "It's hot!" Cassie whined. She gestured to her running shorts and cropped yoga top. "Besides, these are actual clothes. This is really not a big deal, Lex."

"I know. You're just easy to rile up." Alexis tilted her head and inspected the canvas Cassie was working on. "Is this a wedding present?"

"It's not finished yet," Cassie replied sheepishly.

"I really like it." Cassie had taken one of Alexis's numerous iPhone shots from the night that Kate and Rick had gotten engaged and had started the task of transforming it into a black and white acrylic on canvas painting.

Alexis moved over to the corner of the living room dubbed the "boom box" (it was where all the instruments were stored), before picking up her violin. "I want to talk to you about the music for the wedding," Alexis propositioned, slinging her bow across her shoulders.

"And what exactly did you want to talk about?" Cassie asked, flicking at her iPad to take another look at the photo.

"Well, I know Kate asked you to look after music and I assume that you booked your old band for the reception."

"I don't hear a question yet."

"That's because there is no question. I know what songs Dad wants played and I have an idea," Alexis replied. She positioned her violin underneath her chin, before beginning to play.

"Baby Castle!" Cassie gasped. "You are bad_ass!_ I'm calling the boys right now."

* * *

Lanie was giving the nail lady death glares as the Dita Von Teese red shellac was applied to her fingernails. "My fingers do _not_ bend this way," She hissed, when she caught Cassie giggling at her.

"Pain is beauty," Cassie retorted, wrinkling her nose when she saw that the nail technician was exfoliating her feet. She managed to shoot the girl a polite grin, but shuddered when the pumice stone hit her instep.

"I forgot you have ticklish feet," Kate teased, standing up and stretching after spending over an hour in a hairdresser's chair. Her stylist had insisted that the only way to get Veronica Lake waves that would last the whole day of the wedding was a wet set into pin curls the day before. Kate currently had a headful of tightly rolled curls held with neat metal pins.

"That's a really attractive look you're rocking right there, Kate," Alexis joked, waddling over to dry her toenails under the UV light.

"Hey, show a little respect. This time tomorrow I'll be your stepmother."

"She's been watching _Cinderella_ to make sure she does it properly," Cassie added smarmily.

Kate death stared her sister through the mirror, where she was wrapping a silk scarf around her hair, to protect the curls from being mussed.

"Kate hasn't made me clean the house, or tried to buy my love. I'm sure she'll do great," Alexis soothed.

"I have absolutely no need to buy your love. And it clearly didn't work on that one," Kate replied, jerking her thumb towards Cassie.

Cassie looked up from her argument with the nail lady (no, there was no way she was having nail extensions attached to her nails. She kept them short for a reason), and shot Kate a cheeky grin. "Eto sharf zastavlyayet vas vyglyadetʹ kak Babushka," (That scarf makes you look like Babushka), she chirped.

"Eto potomu, chto on yavlyayetsya odnim iz Babushka avtora," (That's because it is one of Babushka's) Kate replied as she sank her feet into a basin of hot water.

"Now come on. It isn't fair when you two do that," Lanie interjected.

"Do what?" Cassie and Kate echoed.

"I have to agree with Lanie," Alexis chipped in.

"When the two of you start babbling in Russian and leave us looking like dumbasses because we can't keep up," Lanie pointed out.

"Sorry, guys. I don't even realise I do it. I was just telling Kate she looks like our Grandma. She actually used to pin her hair like that all the time when we were kids."

"She did too! I'd forgotten all about that!"

* * *

Cassie had one hand wrapped tightly around the handle of her handbag, the other twisted with Kate's fingers. They hadn't made this visit together since she was fifteen years old.

"Hey, Mama," Kate whispered, her fingers tracing the outline of her Mom's name on the tombstone.

"I really hate that you're not here for this," Kate sighed. "I'm getting married tomorrow." Kate dropped the bouquet of purple Singapore orchids and gardenias against the headstone, before sitting down in front of the smooth granite stone. "I really think you'd love what we have planned. The ceremony is at St. Michaels and my dress is just divine."

"She's going to look really beautiful, Mama. And the guy she's getting hitched to… let's just say you'd be a big fan," Cassie joked.

Kate managed to shoot Cassie a withering glare. "Momma, I'm marrying Rick Castle," she confessed. "Which is insane, right? I remember you joking with me way back when you read his first novel that he was perfect for me," Kate paused, feeling happy tears well up in her eyes.

"He is, Mom. He really is exactly what Katya needs. I don't think I've ever seen her so happy," Cassie added, her hand coming up to rest on Kate's shoulder, squeezing gently.

"And now Cassie's gone and found herself a writer too. Honestly, Mom, you ruined the pair of us with the amount of books you forced us to read as kids."

"Cassie has not found herself a writer. Cassie met a gentleman, who happens to be a writer, whom she has had coffee with one time. There is no need to get ahead of ourselves and there is absolutely no indication that he sees me as anything other than Kate's annoying little sister," Cassie clarified.

"You should see how Cassie lights up when she's around him, Mama."

Cassie elbowed her sister in the ribs lightly. "You know, this visit isn't about me," Cassie twisted and rummaged through her giant handbag, fishing out her ukulele. "The visit is about Katie and her fiancé. They're pretty awesome. They're the kind of couple that people like, write stories about. I don't really write stories, but I do write songs."

"You wrote us a song?" Kate interjected, her voice hushed.

"Well, kind of. You guys totally inspired some of it. It's not quite finished yet, but I hope that's okay?"

"I'd really love to hear it," Kate whispered, bumping Cassie's shoulder.

"That was the idea, you dork," Cassie teased. She looked over at the headstone. "I don't really write many songs. And when I do, I don't play them for people. So this is kind of a big deal." Cassie gave Kate a wink, before picking her ukulele up. She paused for a second, and then started to play.

_I'm just a little bit caught in the middle__  
__Life is a maze and love is a riddle__  
__I don't know where to go I can't do it alone I've tried__  
__And I don't know why_

Cassie bit her lip playfully, swaying along with the sunshiney tune of the song

_Slow it down__  
__Make it stop-__  
__Or else my heart is going to pop__  
__'Cause it's too much__  
__Yeah, it's a lot__  
__To be something I'm not_

_I'm a fool__  
__Out of love__  
__'Cause I just can't get enough_

Kate smiled fondly at her little sister. She didn't quite know how Cassie managed to smush so much of her optimism into one song, but Kate was quite certain that Cassie was the only person who could make the fear of the unknown sound exciting.

_I am just a little girl lost in the moment__  
__I'm so scared but I don't show it__  
__I can't figure it out__  
__It's bringing me down I know__  
__I've got to let it go__  
__And just enjoy the show_

Cassie played the final note of the song, and then let silence settle over the graveyard.

"It's not quite finished yet," Cassie shrugged. "But I guess I was inspired by you guys being able to let go of all the dark and the crappiness and all the stuff that kept you apart, and you were both brave enough to fight for what you wanted, and you were okay with the fact that you didn't know what was going to come next."

Kate moved so that she was behind Cassie, the pair of them facing their mother's tombstone. "Mama, you were so right. Having a little sister is the best thing in the world."

* * *

Cassie was clearing the table, mentally spinning out at all the changes that had taken place in the last few months of her life. She'd spent quite a bit of time on the plane from Sydney trying to imagine what life would be like when she got back to New York. Eating dinner at her father's house on the night before her sister's wedding was not one of the scenarios she'd had in mind.

"Katie, I thought you might want to look at this," Jim suggested, gesturing to the white leather photo album on the coffee table.

"Is that your wedding album?" Kate asked.

"Just don't laugh at the monkey suit."

Kate waited for Cassie to finish loading the dishwasher, before opening up the album.

"Wow," Cassie breathed. "Mom was a big Farrah Fawcett fan, wasn't she?" She traced the close up of her mother, hair blowdried into the loose waves that had been made so famous by the Charlie's Angel.

"Huge. She adored her," Jim interjected quietly.

"Oh, her dress was gorgeous. It totally looks like something you'd wear, Cass," Kate commented.

Cassie shot Kate a look. She didn't want to get into her own politicised views on marriage with her father. Not when they were having such a lovely, civilised evening.

"I actually have it up in storage, if you ever want it, Cassie," Jim added, perching himself on the arm of the couch the girls were sharing.

"I just need to find someone to wear it for," Cassie joked.

Kate flipped through the pages of the album, commenting quietly on the various photos (particularly on the fairly hideous shade of Jaffa the bridesmaids wore). She flicked over to the first photos of the church.

"Holy shit, Daddy! You had a porn star moe! That is disgusting!" Cassie gasped. She bit her lip when she realised what she'd said. She hadn't called her father Daddy since she was ten years old. She looked up at him and saw him giving her the same gentle smile Kate often did.

"It was the 70s, sweetie. We all had moustaches," He teased, squeezing her shoulder. Cassie noticed that he didn't move his hand from her shoulder. She didn't say a word.

They continued flicking through the photos, Jim recounting the occasional anecdote from the day.

Kate looked up from the final photo to shoot her Dad a grin. "Looks like you guys had an amazing day," she rasped.

"It was perfect," Jim answered. "Katie, your Mom would be bursting out of her skin tonight if she were still with us. She'd be so proud of you."

"Thanks, Dad," Kate whispered in response, her voice hoarse.

"Now you girls better get home. Your Mom would've had my head if she knew I was keeping you from your beauty sleep!"

Cassie checked the time on her phone. "Lex and Lanie will be back at my place soon. We should get moving."

"No problem. Would you excuse me for a second?" Kate said quickly, dashing down the hallway.

"Did you have a lot of toasts at your wedding?" Cassie asked.

Jim nodded. "Oh yeah. Nobody warned me that it was vodka from the old country," He recalled fondly.

Cassie opened her mouth, but paused as she searched for the right words. "Katya's been kinda discerning about the old school Russian traditions she wants as part of the wedding. We're not ransoming the bride or anything like that, but we are going to have at least a few toasts," Cassie explained. She took in her father's reaction, but stopped him before he could speak. "Clearly, that isn't really something you're going to want to get in on, but believe me, the family will talk if you don't."

"Your aunts still haven't gotten over the fact that your Mom married outside of the cultural circle."

"Yeah, so, I spoke to the venue. They're going to carry trays around and you need to make sure you grab the glasses that have the green rim on them. They'll be water, or sparkling grape juice. Nobody will know a thing."

"I appreciate the thought, Cassie," Jim said quietly.

"No problem." Cassie bit her lip, before throwing caution into the wind. She reached out and pulled her father into a hug. She felt her father stiffen for a second, before he wrapped his arms around her waist, squeezing her into a Daddy bear hug. Cassie smiled against his neck when she felt his lips brush against the crown of her head.

Kate walked down the hallway, her face paler than usual, bearing all the signs of having had water splashed on it to wash away the evidence of tears. She took a look at the embrace happening in front of her, before hastening over and slipping each arm around her father and sister.

The three of them stood there, locked into an embrace, quietly commemorating, before Jim insisted that the girls get home and get to bed.

* * *

Cassie bustled around the kitchen, throwing together her and Kate's signature breakfast. She rinsed the blender, before assembling a tray and sneaking back into her bedroom.

Cassie managed to get the door open one handed, entering the room with her back on the door where she saw Kate wide awake, leaning against the headboard with a pillow behind her back.

She looked up from where she was inspecting her ring. "I'm getting married today," she murmured, incredulity colouring her tone.

"You are getting married today. I am so excited for you, Katie," Cassie reiterated sincerely.

Kate bit her lip to hide her smile. "I'm really excited too," she glanced over at the dress hanging behind her door. "Will that fit me if I eat all of this?"

"Don't be a fat bitch. Half of that is for me."

* * *

Kate had just managed to drag her butt out of the shower and was applying moisturiser when there was a knock at the door. She slipped her robe on and wandered to the door. She smiled when at the foot of the door, four grande coffees sat in their paper tray, a note sitting innocently on top.

_Just wanted to put a smile on your face this morning, even if I won't be around to see it. _

Kate plucked her coffee out of the tray (conveniently marked out with a K on top), a smile creeping on her face unbidden as the taste of espresso and vanilla hit her tongue.

"Kate! What are you doing? The makeup artist is going to be here any minute!"

* * *

The bridesmaids had all had their hair rolled into vintage perfection, a large white gardenia decorating a victory roll.

"Now, that Russian Red isn't going to go anywhere with the blotting I did and not with that sealing coat over it, but just for your own peace of mind, keep this tube in one of your handbags," The makeup artist instructed, waving the black tube of Mac lipstick. Alexis intercepted it, and tossed it into the beaded purple clutch that was being shared by the girls for the day.

Kate's hair was given one last spray with hairspray. After that, her cage veil was delicately set over her curls, a branch of Singapore Orchids pinned atop the headband holding it onto her head.

"Oh, Katie. You look like Rita Hayworth," Katie breathed.

Kate couldn't help but twirl around, a giggle escaping her lips.

"C'mon, let's get you dressed."

* * *

The photographer had arrived and had damn near broken the button on the camera with the amount of snaps he'd taken.

Kate and Cassie piled into the 1940s model Rolls Royce, bound for the church. Cassie had taken great delight in waving to other cars like Julie Andrews, giggling at the cheers and honks.

Kate grabbed Cassie's hand. "Look at me for a second, milaya," (sweetie) Kate ordered.

Cassie turned from the window to face her sister. "What is it, Katya?"

"Thank you," Kate spoke. She grabbed both of Cassie's hands. "For everything. For coming back here like Cyclone Cassandra and shaking up my whole life. I never would have been brave enough to fight for this moment if you hadn't kicked my ass about how far I've come."

"I just want you to be happy, Katya. You kidded the world for so long that you were, but you never had me fooled."

"I'm happy. I'm happy in a way that I didn't think was possible after Mom," Kate leaned forward and rested her forehead against Cassie's. "I want this for you, Lapushka. You deserve to be this kind of happy."

The car slowed to a stop, and Cassie sighed. "C'mon, Katie. Let's get you married. Then you can worry about me laying a big wet one on the best man. Not that he's actually interested in me." She shot Kate a charming grin before sweeping up their bouquets, darting out of the car and stepping into the lobby of the church.

Cassie snuck a look down at Castle and couldn't help her giggle at how visibly nervous he was.

Alexis darted forward and pressed her cheek against Kate's (too scared of smudging her lipstick to kiss her properly), "I'm really excited to be your stepdaughter," She chirped.

Kate caught her in a swift embrace. "Can't wait to be your stepmom," she shot back.

The opening strains of _Songbird _by Eva Cassidy began to play throughout the small church. Lanie turned to Kate. "You ready for this, girl? We've still got time to go _Runaway Bride_."

"Oh, go walk down the aisle!"

Cassie snuck a look at her father. She hadn't ever seen that look on his face.

"Come on, Katie. Let's get you hitched," He whispered, linking arms with his daughter. His other hand briefly brushed Cassie's shoulder.

Cassie straightened the skirt of Kate's dress. She gave Kate a smile, before cradling her flowers. "See you on the other side," Cassie whispered, before stepping out into the aisle of the church.

The energy in the room was palpable. She couldn't help it. Cassie gave Castle a cheeky wink when she saw him bouncing on the balls of his feet, impatiently waiting. And Kate…

Kate was radiant. She beamed the entire way down the aisle, her eyes trained at the altar, where her-husband-to be waited. For a few moments, she looked as though she might burst into tears; instead, she got the giggles when Castle stuck his tongue out at her.

Kate stopped at the end of the row with her father, slipping her arm out from his. Jim rested a hand on Kate's shoulder, the other coming up to brush the ring that hung around Kate's neck. "Be happy, Katie," He whispered, leaning forward to brush a kiss against her cheek. Kate's cheeks coloured, and she held his hand, ready to take her final steps as a single woman.

"Take care of her, Rick," Jim uttered quietly, placing Kate's right hand in Rick's.

"Always," he answered solemnly.

Kate beamed radiantly at him, gently squeezing his fingers.

Most of the ceremony was a blur. Cassie was far more interested in watching the happy couple than listening to the readings and she dutifully fixed Kate's train as she moved from place to place. She accepted Kate's bouquet of Singapore orchids and lilies, sitting in the front pew with Alexis and Lanie, gripping both of their hands.

Cassie listened intently as the pair exchanged their vows. Rick had insisted that they write their own for when they exchanged rings; and Cassie had spent hours listening to Kate try and perfect her own.

The priest was a surprisingly young man, his face was generous, and he gave off the sense of being fully consumed by the joy of his vocation.

"I invite you then to declare before God and his Church your consent to become husband and wife," The priest indicated for Rick and Kate to hold hands.

"Richard, do you take Katherine as your wife, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, all the days of your life?"

The whole church could have disappeared for Rick, with the way he seriously committed himself. "I do," He answered, eyes fixed on Kate's face.

"Katherine, do you take Richard as your husband, for better, for worse, or richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, all the days of your life?"

The smile on Kate's face was so big it threatened to split her face in two. All traces of Detective Beckett were gone, Kate Beckett standing in her place. "Always," she swore.

That was the straw that broke the camel's back. Fat, manly tears began to slip down Rick's cheeks as the priest offered a blessing.

Cassie and Alex both took that as their cue. They both stepped forward, each of them holding a wedding band. Cassie wasn't so sure where she stood on the blessing thing, but she pushed as many positive vibes out into the universe as she could.

Kate plucked Rick's ring out of the box Cassie held. "I, Kate, take you, Rick, to be my partner, loving what I know of you, and trusting what I do not yet know. I eagerly anticipate the chance to grow together, getting to know the man you will become, and falling in love a little more every day. I promise to love and cherish you through whatever life may bring us. I promise to be there when you need me, to fill your days with sunshine, to comfort you and encourage you, to help you reach your goals, to be your best friend ever and to love you all my life with all my heart," Kate managed to hold back her own tears, looking up at Rick through the fine web of her veil, eyes dancing with merriment as she slid the ring onto his finger.

"You were my new chance. My new opportunity to stand up, to challenge myself to be a man. You make all the stories make sense. Where there has been cold, you have brought warmth; where there was darkness, you have brought light. Our miracle lies in the path we have chosen together. I enter this marriage with you, knowing that the true magic of love is not to avoid changes, but to follow the path together, hand in hand. Let us commit to the miracle of making each day work, together.

"Whatever lies ahead, good or bad, we will face together. Distance may test us for a time, and time may try us. But if we look to each other first, we will always see a friend. For better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and health, in joy and in sorrow, to love and to cherish, to be faithful to you alone."

Kate closed her eyes as his words washed over her. The words that had first drawn her to him, like a moth to flame. Her eyes opened when she felt him slip her wedding band onto her finger, quickly moving her engagement ring to match.

"By the power vested in me by God, and the state of New York, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You many kiss the bride," The priest intoned.

A collective laugh rang throughout the church at the slightly lecherous waggle of Rick's eyebrows, before he grabbed his bride, dipped her and kissed her. The photographer jumped up and snapped the shot as the church rang with applause.

The marriage licence was signed and a traditional blessing for a married couple was given in Russian, before the bridal party made their way out of the church to the chirpy tune of _I'm Yours_ (Cassie had tried to cajole into a bridal flashmob, including dancing down the aisle; Kate had told her to have her own wedding for it).

* * *

Like all proper Russian weddings, photos had been taken all over the city, (including Central Park, a very specific set of swings, at Kate's insistence, plus a recreation of the famous kissing photo taken in Times Square celebrating the surrender of the Japanese troops), before making the trip across the city to Coney Island Amusement Park.

Kate couldn't get the grin off her face. "We're married," she repeated for the umteenth time. She leaned forward and grabbed her husband's face, pressing a smacking kiss against his lips.

"You look beautiful," Rick told her sincerely, his lips brushing across her cheek, slowly moving down her neck.

"We are not having sex in the Rolls," Kate informed him, gently pushing at his chest.

"Why not?" Castle whined.

"Because the entire reception would know it. Besides, anticipation is half the fun," Kate reasoned.

"That picture you sent me earlier today was mean," Castle pouted.

Kate thought of the cheeky snap of herself in her retro inspired underwear she'd picture messaged to Castle, and giggled. She gently bit her lip, looking up at him, doe eyed. "There is one thing that could change my mind," she hinted, tongue coming to poke out between her lips.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah," Kate agreed. She leaned close to his ear. "Tell me where we're going on our honeymoon."

Rick had insisted that he be allowed to plan the honeymoon, without input from his bride. Kate had figured out that because he had asked if she had a current passport, it was A) most likely overseas, and because she hadn't been ordered to the doctor's surgery for nasty vaccine shots (the thought made her shudder), B) they were most likely going to a developed country.

Kate hadn't even been allowed to pack her own bag. She'd been whisked out to a romantic dinner three days before the wedding and she'd returned back to the loft to find Cassie sitting on top of a packed bag that she hadn't been given access to. Not even forty five minutes of tickle torture had gotten Cassie to reveal what she knew.

Rick feathered kissed across her cheek, working his way across to her ear. "Never going to happen," he replied.

Kate growled, before pushing him back against the seat and kissing him furiously. She didn't let him escape her grasp until there was a knock against the Perspex that separated the driver from the happy couple.

"We're just pulling up on the venue now. Just thought you'd want to know!" The driver called out in his thick New York accent.

"Thank you," Rick responded. He looked out the window and saw all the flashing lights of Coney Island's amusement parks. "Coolest wedding ever," he sighed happily.

Kate rolled her eyes affectionately at the man child she'd permanently hitched her wagon to. "Come here," she beckoned. "You have red lipstick all over your face."

* * *

The bridal party lined up to be introduced at the reception. Cassie couldn't help fluttering her lashes a little as Alex set his fedora at a rakish angle on his head. "Gosh, it's warm," he commented. "I can't wait to take off this jacket," he added, adjusting the coat of his 1940s style suit.

"Now, Alex, are you just saying it's hot because I'm around?" Cassie asked teasingly, testing the waters with her flirtation. She gave him a wink when he spluttered. She trailed her fingers up the inside of his wrist before gentle resting her palm against the inside of his elbow. "Come on," she gestured to the door. "Let's go host the shit out of this night."

Cassie and Alex made their way into the room, stepping up to in front of the bridal table. Martha gave them both a wink, before gesturing for them to be given microphones.

"And now, let's welcome the happy couple… Mr. and Mrs. Castle," Martha boomed, raising a hand to where Kate and Rick walked in.

Cassie smirked when she heard chants of "gorko, gorko, gorko!" come from the tables that had Russian family members sitting at them. She giggled, chiming in. The chants got louder and louder, before Kate finally caved. She grabbed her husband and planted a bold kiss on his lips. She didn't stop until the chanting did. She leaned over and whispered something in his ear, before turning to her family members and giving them a mock salute.

The bridal party moved to their table and Cassie and Alex took to the floor, microphones in hand.

"Good evening everyone," Alex greeted.

"I'm Cassie, and this is Alex, and in addition to being the greatest maid of honour and best man team on the planet, we are going to be acting as your MCs for this evening."

"We're in charge of everybody having a good time tonight, so please, if you haven't already, turn to someone you haven't met yet and introduce yourself," Alex instructed.

Cassie nodded to the bar and the staff began to move around the room, trays in hand.

"My role tonight is to be the translator of all things Russian. So I apologise to half the room for the chanting earlier. Gorko basically means bitter in Russian. The idea is that when it gets chanted at a wedding, the couple has to kiss until they get rid of the bitter taste of vodka in their mouths," Cassie explained. She nodded to the staff, who began to hand out the shotglasses of vodka on their tray. She looked over at her Dad, who gave her a wink.

"And let's face it, what is a Russian wedding without toasts?" She asked.

"Now, I was told that smashing your glass after the toast is a good thing, right?" Alex asked.

"Absolutely!" Cassie answered. "It's a really old tradition, but basically, it smashes away any bad luck. So you should all knock that baby back and smash the glass on the ground," Cassie instructed.

Alex raised his glass. "There is a wisdom saying that the wife is the heart and the husband is the head of a good marriage. May you never suffer a heart attack or have a headache!" He toasted, quoting an old Russian fable Cassie had mentioned to him.

"Vypʹyem za lyubovʹ! Gorko!" (Let's drink to love! Gorko!) Cassie added. She tapped her glass against Alex's before swallowing the shot, and tossing the glass against the ground, grinning when it shattered.

"Take a seat, everybody. First course is on its way," Alex invited.

* * *

Somewhere between courses Alexis snuck up to Cassie's chair. "So. I don't know if you've noticed… But take a look at your Dad and my Gram," she pointed out. "Don't make it obvious!"

Cassie picked up her glass, casually taking a sip as she looked over at the table. Jim and Martha were sitting far closer than in laws who didn't really know each other all that well should sit and both had pink flushes on their cheeks.

"Oh my God!" Cassie spluttered. "What? How? What are we going to do?"

"We're going to make that happen," Alexis answered, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Cassie stared at the two, pondering the idea. "What would we even call them? Operation Jartha? Rogett?"

"Operation Jimtha," Alexis decided. She raised her hand for a high five.

Cassie slapped her hand, waggling her eyebrows. "Let's do this."

Several wedding traditions had been played around with. Speeches had been given. The floor had been swept and delicate mood lighting was coming into play.

"You've got this, right?" Cassie asked Alex.

"Yes!" He answered. "Now go, get yourself ready," he ordered, shooing her away.

Cassie rolled her eyes, but scooted away none the less.

"This is a wedding tradition that we're all familiar with," Alex began. "I'd like to invite Rick and Kate to the floor for their first dance as husband and wife."

The wedding guests hushed as Kate and Rick stepped out on the floor. The sound of Big Band began to echo around the room and Rick began to lead Kate in a smooth foxtrot.

_I've got you under my skin.__  
__I've got you deep in the heart of me.__  
__So deep in my heart that you're really a part of me.__  
__I've got you under my skin.__  
_

Both the bride and the groom looked up when the lyrics began. Cassie gave them a wink from behind the microphone she stood behind on the tiny stage set up for the band, before gesturing for them to keep dancing.

_I'd tried so not to give in.__  
__I said to myself: this affair never will go so well.__  
__But why should I try to resist when, baby, I know so well__  
__I've got you under my skin?__I'd sacrifice anything come what might__  
__For the sake of havin' you near__  
__In spite of a warnin' voice that comes in the night__  
__And repeats, repeats in my ear:__  
__Don't you know, little fool, you never can win?__  
__Use your mentality, wake up to reality.__  
__But each time that I do just the thought of you__  
__Makes me stop before I begin__  
__'Cause I've got you under my skin.__  
_

Kate couldn't believe this moment had come. She'd found the guy that made the songs make sense, and now she got to keep him. Her day couldn't be any more perfect.

_I would sacrifice anything come what might__  
__For the sake of havin' you near__  
__In spite of the warning voice that comes in the night__  
__And repeats - how it yells in my ear:__  
__Don't you know, little fool, you never can win?__  
__Why not use your mentality - step up, wake up to reality?__  
__But each time I do just the thought of you__  
__Makes me stop just before I begin__  
__'Cause I've got you under my skin._

_And I love__ you under my skin._

Cassie curtseyed from the stage. "Could I invited Alexis Castle and Jim Beckett to the floor for the father daughter dance, please?"

Cassie looked over at the boys, and then winked at Alexis. She grinned when she heard the opening notes begin to play.

_She's got a smile it seems to me__  
__Reminds me of childhood memories__  
__Where everything__  
__Was as fresh as the bright blue sky__  
__Now and then when I see her face__  
__She takes me away to that special place__  
__And if I'd stare too long__  
__I'd probably break down and cry__Oh, oh, oh__  
__Sweet child o' mine__  
__Oh, oh, oh, oh__  
__Sweet love of mine_

Cassie could see Rick make Alexis giggle uncontrollably as they danced. _Guns'N'Roses_ songs had been the only ones Rick knew all the words to when Alexis was born, and he'd sung her to sleep with _Sweet Child O' Mine _since she'd arrived home from the hospital. He was absolutely stoked when Kate had agreed to have it as the father daughter dance. (Gina had flat out refused and had insisted on something completely saccharine and awful for wedding number two.)

_She's got eyes of the bluest skies__  
__As if they thought of rain__  
__I hate to look into those eyes__  
__And see an ounce of pain__  
__Her hair reminds me of a warm safe place__  
__Where as a child I'd hide__  
__And pray for the thunder__  
__And the rain__  
__To quietly pass me by_

_Oh, oh, oh__  
__Sweet child o' mine__  
__Oh, oh, oh, oh__  
__Sweet love of mine_

Cassie saw the look of surprise when Martha came and cut in on their dance, but Alexis was quick to scoot away, and dash up to the stage.

_Oh, oh, oh, oh__  
__Sweet child o' mine__  
__Oh, oh, oh, oh__  
__Sweet love of mine_

Cassie watched as Daz bounced on the balls of his feet. Alexis counted herself in, and the pair of them began to play a violin and guitar duet of the greatest guitar solo of all time. Cassie was content to bounce on the stage, until she felt someone grab her hand. She found herself tugged onto the dance floor with her Dad and sister. She grinned, grabbing both their hands and dancing with them the way she did when they were little. She barely made it back onto the stage in time to finish singing the song.

_Where do we go?__  
__Where do we go now?__  
__Where do we go?__  
__Oh, oh__  
_

She leaned out on the stage, bending forward to grip Kate's hand.

_Where do we go?__  
__Oh,__  
__Where do we go now?__  
__Where do we go?__  
__Oh, (sweet child)__  
__Where do we go now?__  
__Oh,__  
__Where do we go now?__  
__Oh,__  
__Where do we go?__  
__Oh,__  
__Where do we go now?__  
__Oh,__  
__Where do we go?__  
__Where do we go now?__  
__Where do we go?__  
_

She and Alexis were probably the world's most strangely dressed rockstars, both wearing their purple vintage cut dresses and black heels.

_Oh,__  
__Where do we go now?__  
__No, no, no, no, no, no__  
__Sweet child,__  
__Sweet child of mine_

Cassie added a few extra head bangs with the dying notes of the song, before grabbing Alexis's hand and bowing.

Alexis carefully stowed away her guitar, before linking arms with Cassie and making their way down to the happy couple.

"Happy wedding present?" Alexis offered with a grin.

"Oh yeah," Castle agreed, grabbing both of them by the necks and pulling them into a hug.

* * *

"May I have this dance?"

Cassie looked up at Alex. His face was so wide and eager. "Alright," she agreed.

She followed him out onto the dancefloor, her hand held in his. She gave him a smile, internally cringing when the boys saw them, and instantly began playing _Kiss from a Rose_ by Seal.

They danced for a few moments in amiable silence. "I like you," Alex blurted out.

"What?" Cassie breathed.

"You're like… chocolate ice cream on a hot day. I think you're awesome."

Cassie stared at him, slightly open mouthed for a second. "Why are you telling me this?" She asked.

"Because somebody should. Because you're awesome. Because I really want to take you out for dinner and I really want you to say yes."

What the hell. "Okay," Cassie agreed.

"Really?"

"Really." Cassie froze. "Wait, this wasn't some kind of dare or something, was it? You know, let's be cute because we're maid of honour and best man, or something? Because if that's the case, I'll just kiss you now and you don't have to worry about dinner," She growled, her hackles slightly raised as she jumped to conclusions.

"Cassie! Relax!" Alex soothed her. "I just thought that I'd never have a shot with a girl like you. I figured it would take a lot more convincing to get you to consider it."

Cassie refrained from rolling her eyes. "Coffee was my idea, remember?"

"I just thought you wanted to talk about the wedding."

"I talked non-stop about the wedding because I was worried I'd end up saying something about how much I like the shape of your butt."

Alex laughed out loud, before spinning and dipping Cassie. She squeaked, clinging to his arm. Maybe there was something to be said for American writers, instead of French ballerinas.

* * *

The bouquet had been tossed (Alexis had caught it, much to Rick's chagrin). The garter belt had been retrieved. Cassie had stolen the mike from Daz at one point, proceeding to sing _Shake It Out_ by Florence and the Machine on the dancefloor, shaking what her mama had given her with Kate and Lanie.

"Have an amazing time," Cassie whispered to Kate, squeezing her tightly.

"Thanks for everything, Cass," Kate whispered back.

"Remember that when you're buying presents, capiche?" Cassie joked. She gave Kate one last squeeze, before stepping away and hugging her new brother in law.

"Look after my sister or I'll kick your ass," she threatened.

"Look after my daughter and we're square," He replied. Cassie pulled him into a hug, accepting his kiss on the cheek.

"Now will you tell me where we're going?" Kate asked. Castle only smirked, pulling her into the Rolls.

Cassie stood with Alexis, her arm slung round her as Cassie rested her chin on her shoulder. "So, Operation Jimtha?" Cassie proposed.

"I don't think we're going to have to do anything," Alexis pondered.

"What do you mean?" Cassie asked.

Alexis pointed over to where Martha had grabbed Jim, planting a kiss on his lips, completely oblivious to any of the wedding guests around.

Cassie gaped. "We are so good at this."

_fin._

* * *

**Aaaaannnd... that's a wrap, folks.**

**I just want to say a massive thank you to anybody who took the time to read it, put it in their story follows, their favourites, and especially all those who sent a review. Your kind words have meant more to me than I can say. **

**Photos of the dresses, and links to appropriate Youtube clips can be found on my tumblr. Feel free to follow me there, and on twitter (brookemopolitan)**

**Next up for me is a Bones/Castle crossover, cowritten with the lovely AnnieXMuller (if you haven't read any of her work, go and read it right now. She's amazing). There's a possibility of a sequel to this (essentially a pregnancy fic on crack) if there is enough interest. So if you're keen... let me know.**

**This is the last time I'll remind you of this... but reviews are love. Anyone sending me a review gets a Stana hug :D**


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